"Because I hate that you're doing this stupid thing. And I hate you." The last word came out as a sob.

"No, baby, you don't."

"Don't call me that!"

"Sierra. Come here."

"No! Don't touch me."

"You don't mean that either." Boone crushed her to his chest.

Sierra fought him for a few seconds, swinging punches that didn't land, yelling and thrashing, but he just held on. She gave up fighting the pull of him and clung to him as she cried.

How many times had she imagined Boone holding her, stroking her hair and murmuring sweet things to her? Hundreds. But never like this.

Her voice was m.u.f.fled against his chest when she finally spoke. "When do you go?"

"Tomorrow morning."

She froze. Then she squirmed away. "You're just telling me now now? When did you sign up?"

Boone looked away.

"Tell me."

"Three days after your accident."

Sierra felt all the air leave her lungs. The blood drained from her face and she was drowning. Her lips formed the word why why.

"Because that night at Tyler's party when I told him we were together? I wanted it to be real."

"You think I would've shot you down, Boone?"

"No." His eyes were locked on hers. "I know you would've said yes."

Her cheeks burned with mortification; he'd known how she felt all along.

"You understand my history. Since I was twelve years old I've been counting off the d.a.m.n days until I can get the h.e.l.l out of Wyoming. Last fall, the start of my senior year, I was taking the prep cla.s.ses I needed and I was getting a year of practical experience as an EMT and moving on was finally within my grasp. And then you showed up.

"From the moment we met on the bus, you sucked me in. You were so gorgeous, feisty, funny and sweet-and so easy to talk to. I tried to stay away from you, but something about you, Sierra, just kept pulling me back."

She stared at him, absolutely speechless.

"That night at the party I wanted to kill Tyler for thinking he had the right to put his hands on you. After the accident, I about lost my f.u.c.king mind because you were hurt... That's when I knew you could keep me here. If I got involved with you, like I wanted to, I wouldn't leave. And I have have to leave. I had to have a solid plan to go so I enlisted." to leave. I had to have a solid plan to go so I enlisted."

"No." Sierra found her voice and said it louder. "No." Then she was screaming at him. "No, no, no, no, no! You don't get to do this to me, Boone. You don't get to treat me like a friend, and then tell me you've always felt more for me...the night before you f.u.c.king f.u.c.king leave! You don't get to make me feel guilty for you joining the army because I have some kind of magical hold over you. That's total bulls.h.i.t and it's not fair!" G.o.d. This could not be happening. leave! You don't get to make me feel guilty for you joining the army because I have some kind of magical hold over you. That's total bulls.h.i.t and it's not fair!" G.o.d. This could not be happening.

"Not fair? You think this has been easy for me? Especially the last four months? When we've been together all the d.a.m.n time because I couldn't stay the h.e.l.l away from you? And I had to act like it's not f.u.c.king killing killing me when you look at me like your world would be perfect if I just kissed you." me when you look at me like your world would be perfect if I just kissed you."

She slapped her hands on his chest and shoved him. "The only thing you can kiss, Boone West, is my a.s.s." She spun around and considered kicking over his stupid bike as she skirted the back end of her car. Jerk. a.s.shole. Jerkoff. a.s.shat. He wanted to leave her? Fine. He could leave her. She'd be better off.

Such a f.u.c.king liar you are, Sierra.

"So that's it?" Boone shouted. "That's how you're gonna say goodbye to me?"

Sierra whipped a U-turn and marched back up to him. "How did you expect I'd say goodbye? Strip my clothes off and let you take my virginity in a field of wildflowers under a full moon? Screw that. I'm saving my virginity for someone who deserves it. And. That. Is. Not. You." She punctuated each word with a poke on his hard chest.

Boone said, "You do that," in a throaty rasp she'd never heard from him. "In the meantime, I'm taking this." He wrapped one hand around the back of her neck and clamped the other on her b.u.t.t, pulling her in for a kiss.

She should've shoved him away. But his kiss was like a drug. Intense, determined, amazingly seductive-as if he was trying to convince her that his pa.s.sion for her was real. That he'd been imagining this kiss for as long as she had. That he'd wanted it as much. Mouths and tongues clashed and she slipped her arms around his waist, her hands clutching his shirt.

The kiss was beyond anything she'd ever experienced. Rough and s.e.xy, bringing alive things inside her she'd heard about but had never felt.

Then Boone slowed it down. The kiss became soft. An unhurried tease, as if they had all the time in the world to explore. To learn each other.

But they didn't. By this time tomorrow, he'd be gone.

Sierra kept kissing him even as her tears fell.

Then Boone's hands were on her face, trying to wipe away the moisture but her tears ran over his fingers.

He moved his mouth back; she felt his lips against hers and his breath in her mouth as he whispered, "Sierra. Baby, please don't cry." He planted tender smooches on her lips. His mouth wandered down her neck and her entire body erupted in goose flesh. He nuzzled the sweep of her shoulder and stopped, breathing against her skin.

She had to bite her lip to keep from sobbing when he strung soft kisses along her collarbone, right where the injury had hurt the most. But that pain was nothing compared to the pain she felt now.

Boone's fingers entwined in her hair and he tipped her head back. His beautiful eyes were dark with remorse and something else, something that made her pulse quicken. "I knew it'd be like this between us."

"But it's still not enough."

He didn't answer. He just consumed her mouth again.

While kissing him was better than she'd dreamed, she still felt like someone was stabbing her in the gut with a rusty knife as Boone took the kiss deeper until she feared she'd never get out.

She broke away, resting her forehead to his.

"Sierra-"

"Don't say anything."

They stayed like that for a long time. Not looking at each other, clinging to each other, so close but so far apart.

She whispered, "I have to go."

"Not like this."

"There's no other way. This was your choice."

He placed one last soft kiss on her lips.

Sierra pulled away from him. "Goodbye, Boone."

"See you around, McKay." His hands fell away.

Sierra didn't look at him. Not even in her rearview mirror as she b.u.mped over the cattle guard and drove away.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Ben and Quinn had enlisted Gavin's help moving cow/calf pairs from one pasture to another. Helping wasn't entirely accurate-he'd been designated the gate opener. But it'd been a great morning. Cruising around on four wheelers and watching his brothers work cattle. Listening to Charlie tell stories.

He climbed out of his Lexus, in desperate need to ditch his dirty clothes and hit the shower, when Rielle yelled at him from the closest garden. He met her halfway down the road and stole a kiss. "Hey, s.e.xy lady. What's up?"

"Have you talked to Sierra today? She swore she wanted to help me and I haven't seen her."

"No. But it's summer vacation. She mentioned it was her right to sleep in until noon, at least the first week." He couldn't believe how early the school year ended in Wyoming. In Arizona, Sierra would be in school at least another month. "I'll check on her."

After brushing off the ever-present dust, he scaled the stairs and knocked on Sierra's door. "Sweetheart? Are you up?" He heard a thump. But no answer. Then another thump. He turned the handle and opened the door.

Boxes were stacked beside her bed. Everything had been stripped off the walls. She stood by the closet, dumping winter clothes into a box.

"I told you not to come in without knocking first," she snapped.

"I knocked. You didn't answer." His gaze moved over the organized destruction. "Are you planning to redecorate?"

"No. Just getting ready to leave."

"Leave?"

Sierra whirled around. "Yes, leave. I'm done with the living-in-Wyoming experiment."

Gavin stepped in the room, avoiding a pile of papers. "Whoa. You want to rewind and tell me what's going on?"

She crossed her arms. Her face distorted into the sneer that indicated he'd just entered the battle zone. "Whoa? Enough with the fake-cowboy shtick, Dad. It's embarra.s.sing."

He ignored the verbal jab. "What are you talking about, going home?"

"I promised you I'd stick it out an entire school year. School ended. You promised me if I hated it we could go home. I freakin' hate it here and I cannot wait to get back where I belong."

"Now wait just a d.a.m.n minute. Nothing was set in stone. We were going to discuss it."

"Nothing to discuss. I held up my end of the deal, it's time for you to hold up yours."

"What the h.e.l.l happened? You didn't hate Wyoming two d.a.m.n days ago. I don't get where this is coming from, so will you please explain it to me?"

"No. My mind is made up."

"You change your mind about everything, Sierra. So you have to give me more than, I hate Wyoming I want to go home I hate Wyoming I want to go home."

She glared at him.

"Really? I'm just supposed to drop everything and move back to Arizona because you want to?"

"You made me drop everything to move to Wyoming. How is this any different?"

"It's a h.e.l.luva lot different." Do not remind her you're the adult and you make the decisions. Take a different tack. Do not remind her you're the adult and you make the decisions. Take a different tack. "You want to tell me what happened to you in the last day? Because this change of heart or mind, or whatever, came completely out of left field." "You want to tell me what happened to you in the last day? Because this change of heart or mind, or whatever, came completely out of left field."

She vehemently shook her head. "If you think this is sudden then you haven't been paying attention. But that's not a surprise since most your time is spent with Rielle."

"You're really going there, Sierra? Making Rielle the root cause of your problem?"

Her cheeks colored with guilt. But that didn't keep her from snapping back, "Rielle is is the cause of this problem-your problem-you don't want to leave Wyoming because of her, which is not the cause of this problem-your problem-you don't want to leave Wyoming because of her, which is not my my problem." problem."

His daughter had him there.

"Anyway I thought she was building a new house so she didn't have to live with us."

"Plans change. She's living with us permanently."

"And you didn't even think to tell me about that? Great. Well, it doesn't matter because I won't stay here and you can't make me."

"What are you going to do? Drive to Scottsdale by yourself? You certainly can't live there by yourself."

"You're forgetting Scottsdale isn't my only option."

His stomach pitched.

"Mom has been asking what my plan is for the summer."

"Why is this the first I've heard of it?"

"Maybe because you only hear what you wanna hear," she shot back.

Hadn't Rielle accused him of the same thing? "I would've remembered that. What did your mother-"

"Are you going to move us back to Arizona or not?" she interrupted.

"I have to decide right now? Then fine. No. This is ridiculous, Sierra. Let's just take a step back and discuss this rationally."

"No. I haven't seen my mom in almost six months. I miss her. I want to be with my mom. You don't care about that at all. You hate her and you're trying to keep me away from her." She started to cry. "I don't want to be here anymore. I hate it here."