"You don't like it?"

"It's a bit strong. What is it?"

"It's coffee fusion, actually."

"What does that even mean?"

Justin sauntered over to the cabinet and took out a can and a package. "It's my own recipe. Cuban coffee mixed with this one." He pointed to the black packaging that had a white skull and crossbones on it.

"What the h.e.l.l is that?"

"It's coffee. I order it online. Nothing else is caffeinated enough for me."

"That's why you wanted to serve it to me, wasn't it? You knew I'd hate this...concoction."

Instead of answering, he simply let out that raspy laugh of his again, except this time, he was laughing way harder than before.

Jade entered the kitchen, wearing a long black t-shirt that must have been the one he wasn't wearing. "What's so funny?"

Justin's mischievous eyes peeked from behind his mug. He snickered. "We were just having coffee."

Jade shook her head. "You didn't drink his mud, did you? I don't know how he likes that stuff."

I reminded myself of my plan to kill him with kindness. Taking another sip of the coffee, I nodded. "Actually, at first taste, it was pretty strong, but I actually think I really like it."

It was disgusting.

"You'd better be careful. That s.h.i.t is potent. Justin is immune to it, but the one and only time I drank it, it kept me up for like four days."

Justin chuckled. "Apparently, we kept Amelia up last night."

Jade turned to me. "Oh, s.h.i.t. I'm sorry."

Shrugging, I said, "It's no big deal. I got used to it after a while."

"Was that when you decided you wished you could join in?" he cracked.

f.u.c.k him.

I was not going to respond to that.

The more I looked over at his smug expression, the more determined I became to finish the entire d.a.m.n mug of coffee to spite him. "I'm really surprised at how much I'm actually liking this," I lied.

Jade chose to ignore Justin's earlier comment. "What do you say after breakfast we head to town, Amelia? I'd love it if you could show me around the island."

"Alright. That would be nice."

She walked over to him and wrapped her arm around his waist. "You want to come with us, babe?"

"No. I have s.h.i.t to do," Justin said before finishing off the last of his coffee and putting the cup in the sink.

"Okay. Just the girls then."

The coffee had turned me into a spaz. As Jade and I walked around Newport that morning, she kept having to tell me to slow down. Apparently, in her heels, she couldn't keep up with me.

At one point later in the afternoon, we stopped to rest our legs. Jade and I sat on a wooden bench overlooking the dozens of docked sailboats as the sun shined over the water.

"So, how did you and Justin meet?" I asked.

"I was in the audience at this club called Hades in the city. Justin was performing there that night. He was eyeing me the whole time he was singing and after the show, he came to find me. When he said he was thinking of me while he was singing the last song, I nearly died. We've been inseparable since."

My face felt hot. I wasn't willing to admit to myself that it was jealousy. The thought of them connecting so intimately while he was in the middle of performing made me uncomfortable for some reason. Maybe because it reminded me of the songs he used to write for me. You'd think nothing would bother me after having to endure their f.u.c.king last night.

"What kind of music does he play now?"

"Well, he does some covers of artists like Jack Johnson, but he also writes a lot of original stuff. He mostly plays clubs, but his manager has been trying to get him a music deal. Of course, the girls all go crazy over him. That part has taken some getting used to for me."

"I'm sure it's hard."

"Yeah. Big time." She tilted her head. "What about you? No boyfriend?"

"I just got out of a relationship."

I spent the next half-hour rehashing to her what happened with Adam. Jade was really easy to talk to, and I could tell it really upset her to find out about Adam's cheating on me.

"Well, better to find out these things now while you're still young than to waste a decade with someone like that."

"You're very right."

"We'll have to find you someone this summer. I've seen a lot of hot guys walking around here today."

"Really? Because the only ones I've seen were holding each other's hands."

She laughed. "No. There were others."

"I'm really not looking to get into another relationship."

"Who said anything about that? You need to get laid...have some fun, especially after what that d.i.c.k of an ex did to you. You deserve a hot summer fling, someone who knocks your socks off, someone you can't stop thinking about even when they're not around."

Sadly, it's your boyfriend that I can't get out of my head at the moment.

She meant well, so I just smiled and nodded even though I had no intention of sleeping with anyone this summer.

On our way home, we pa.s.sed Sandy's on the Beach, a restaurant that was known for live music at night and really good food. A sign out front read, Temporary Summer Help Wanted. Since there was a university just over the bridge, a lot of the students went home in the summer, leaving some of the local restaurants in need of temporary wait staff.

I stopped short in front of the entrance. "Do you mind if I go in and inquire about this?"

"Sure. I'd actually like to check it out, too."

It turned out that Sandy's was desperate for summer help. Both Jade and I had waitressing experience, so we sat down and filled out applications. By the time we walked out of there, we each had a job. The manager basically told us we could work any night we wanted. The extra money and flexibility was impossible to pa.s.s up. Jade was particularly happy that he'd told her it was no problem if she had to suddenly cancel a shift in the event she got called back to Manhattan for an audition. We were each going to start tomorrow.

That night, Jade thought we should celebrate our new jobs over dinner and drinks on the upper deck back at the house. It hadn't dawned on me how peaceful being away from Justin all day had been.

When we walked in the door, b.u.t.terflies started to swarm in my stomach again as soon as I smelled his cologne. Justin was standing in the kitchen drinking a beer when Jade ran over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. Justin was tall-over six feet-but Jade wasn't that much shorter than him. Next to both of them, I was basically a midget.

G.o.d, he cleaned up nice.

Justin had changed out of his camouflage shorts from earlier into dark jeans and a gray shirt with black stripes that hugged his chest. He'd done something to his hair that I couldn't pinpoint. Maybe washed it? Whatever it was, it brought out the blue in his eyes-eyes that were now gazing into Jade's.

She ran her fingers through his hair then kissed him. "I missed you, babe. Guess what? We both got jobs at this restaurant on the beach."

"Did you tell them you could get called back to New York anytime?"

"The guy said it didn't matter. He said I could basically just work whenever I want."

"Really. That sounds a bit shady to me. But whatever. You sure he doesn't just want in your pants, Jade?"

"He said the same thing to me," I interrupted.

"Well, then it can't be that."

It took me a bit to realize that he'd just insulted me.

Jade intercepted before I could muster up a comeback. "It's mild out. How about we all have dinner on the upstairs deck tonight. We could barbecue that steak I have marinating in the fridge."

I didn't have the heart to tell her I don't like red meat, so I just kept quiet. He would probably think I was looking for an excuse not to have dinner with them.

Kill him with kindness.

"I'm not that great of a cook, but I can make a big salad."

Justin smacked the counter. "Great. I'll start the grill while Amelia tosses her big salad."

He started to walk outside when I yelled after him.

"You know what Nana would say to you right now? She'd tell you to go wash your dirty mouth out with soap."

He turned around and lifted his brow. "Soap wouldn't cut it."

I suppose I should have been happy that he was talking to me as opposed to pretending I wasn't there. I guess we were making progress?

After chopping up lettuce, carrots, red onion, tomatoes and cuc.u.mbers, I dressed the salad with homemade honey mustard vinaigrette.

I carried it upstairs where Justin and Jade were already sitting down at the table. Jade had poured three gla.s.ses of Merlot, and Justin was sipping one as he looked over at the waves, which were rough tonight.

Once we started eating, Justin wouldn't look at me or make conversation. I filled my plate with salad and bread, and it took a while before anyone noticed that I wasn't eating anything else.

Jade's mouth was full when she said, "You didn't even touch the steak."

"I don't really like to eat meat."

Justin chuckled. "Is that why you can't find a man?"

I dropped my fork. "You're a p.r.i.c.k. Seriously. I don't recognize you anymore. How were we ever best friends?"

"I used to ask myself that all the time before I stopped giving a s.h.i.t."

I got up from the table and went downstairs. Leaning against the kitchen counter, I breathed in and out slowly to calm myself down.

Jade came up quietly behind me. "I really don't get what's going on between you two or why he refuses to talk about it. Are you sure you guys never dated?"

"I told you, Jade. It wasn't anything like that."

"Will you tell me what happened?"

"I think he should be the one to explain it to you. Honestly, I don't want to p.i.s.s him off any more than I already have by overstepping my bounds. Besides, I can honestly say that if he's mad, it's because of the way I left...my running away. Anything that happened before that is irrelevant now. He's p.i.s.sed because of how I handled it."

"Let's just go back upstairs and try to have a nice dinner."

Back on the upper deck, Justin was stone-faced, pouring more wine into his gla.s.s. A part of me wanted to slap him across the face, but another part felt guilty that I had caused so much anger in him. He said he didn't care, but I refused to believe he would be acting up like this if he didn't.

I touched his arm. "Will you just talk to me?"

He whipped his arm away. "I'm over it. I'm not talking about anything."

"Will you do it for Nana?"

His head flipped up, and his beautiful blue eyes darkened. "Stop f.u.c.king bringing her into this. Your grandmother was a wonderful woman. She was the mother I never had. She never turned her back on me like pretty much everyone else in my life. This house is a representation of Mrs. H., which is why I'm here. I'm not here because of you. You want me to talk, but what you don't seem to understand is that I don't have anything to say about anything that happened almost a decade ago. I've erased it all. It's too late, Amelia. I don't care if you and Jade become friends, alright? But don't bother trying to get through to me because we're not gonna be friends. You put me in a s.h.i.t mood, and I don't want to spend this whole summer in a s.h.i.t mood. We're roommates. Nothing more. Stop pretending there is something more to it. Stop pretending to like the G.o.dd.a.m.n coffee. Stop pretending everything is just great. Cut the s.h.i.t and see things for what they are. We don't mean anything to each other." He got up and took his plate. "I'm done, Jade. I'll see you in the room."

Jade and I sat in silence, listening to nothing but the sound of the waves crashing beneath us.

"I'm so sorry, Amelia."

"Please. Don't, okay? He's right. Sometimes, you can't fix things." Despite the complacent words that had come out of my mouth, a tear fell down my cheek.

Eleven Years Earlier