I was pacing back and forth wondering how I could get in touch with him. I meant to ask Phenomenon if he had spoken to Lorenzo but Sway sidetracked me with the show he put on. Oh, how things had changed in less than twenty-four hours. Last night I was embarra.s.sed and p.i.s.sed but now if I had the money, I would send Sway a bouquet of flowers, thanking him for the unintentional generosity he bestowed upon me.

After printing out the plug in Page Six I taped it on my kitchen wall. I tried calling Lorenzo one last time and since I couldn't get him on the phone, I decided to finally make myself something to eat. Between bites of my veggie omelet and drinking orange juice I continued to read the write up and smile at the same time. For the first time in a while I was feeling good. I turned my music on and brought some much needed life into my apartment.

"Dior, you are on your way," I said out loud as I stood in front of my full length mirror. "No matter how hard he may try, Sway will not be able to stop me. Pretty soon, I'll be back to walking the red carpet in the best designer clothes and it won't be because Sway paid for them. The designers will be giving me clothes for free and will be begging me to wear their s.h.i.t because I'll give them press. Sway will regret the day he ever dumped me. I'll be on all the blogs, magazines, doing television interviews and it won't be as Sway's girlfriend, it will be because I'm Dior.

I'll show Sway and everybody else who thought I wouldn't make it. I will be a star, I will be a star," I repeated over and over again because I felt if I said it enough times, I would convince myself that it would come true.

Lorenzo.

h.e.l.l Of A Life.

"How is she doing?" I asked the doctor as I watched my mother sitting in her wheelchair staring out the window.

"We feel optimistic that we've found the right combination of medications but of course we won't know for sure until we give it some time."

"Has she started talking at all?"

"No, she's still withdrawn in herself. As I told you before, Mr. Taylor, your mother may never speak again."

I walked in my mother's room and stood next to her but it was as if I wasn't even there. Every time I would come to visit her the only thing that gave me peace of mind was that the doctor a.s.sured me she wasn't in any physical pain but mentally my mother was gone. I didn't know which one felt worse, when she was a drug addict or when she was diagnosed with being schizophrenia.

After her diagnosis I found the best private psychiatric treatment center in the state of New York but in the three years she'd been here instead of getting better she seemed to be fading further away. She went from hallucinations, delusions, disorganized speech to finally not speaking at all. At first I blamed the doctors, nurses anybody but it had nothing to do with them. My mother had been sick for a very long time but n.o.body noticed because her erratic behavior was blamed on her crack addiction. By the time I found her, my father was dead and I barely recognized her as being the woman that gave birth to me but she was. And even though she had been out of my life since I was a little boy, when I found her again, I still loved her as if she had raised me and never abandoned me.

What I hoped for each time I would visit was that my mother knew I was here and felt my presence. That never seemed to be the case but I think that's what kept me coming back week after week. I was praying one day she would give me a sign that she did. So when she stared out the window I would stare too, wondering in my mind what she was thinking about, if anything at all. Did she notice when it would rain or when the sun would come out; did that make a difference in her mood? Did she appreciate the garden view she had from her room?

All these questions I had but I wasn't able to accept I would never know the answers to any of them.

"Yo, what's good?" I answered, as I got in the car leaving my mother's treatment center.

"We have a situation."

"I see. I'm headed back that way, I'll be in touch." I ended the call thinking that I wasn't in the mood for the bulls.h.i.t today. When I would come see my mother it literally drained all my energy. It would be as if I left it in the room with her. Having to go home and deal with business bulls.h.i.t wasn't what I needed right now.

"d.a.m.n, who the f.u.c.k is this?" I moaned feeling the vibration of the phone. I saw Lala's name and remembered I hadn't been by there the last couple of weeks. "What's up, Lala."

"Hey, Lorenzo."

"Is everything ok? You don't sound good."

"Tania's been asking for you. Last time you were here you told me to tell her you would be back soon to visit but you've been a no show."

"I apologize. I've had a lot going on these last couple weeks. I have some business I have to handle tonight but I'll be over there tomorrow afternoon."

"Are you sure? I don't want to tell Tania and then you not show up."

"Lala, I'll be there."

"Ok, we'll see you tomorrow. Bye." As my call was wrapping up with Lala, Dior was beeping on the other line. I simply ignored it like I had been doing all her calls for the last few weeks. The crazy part was I really did want to speak with her but my life was on overload right now. Darnell used to handle a great deal of business for me and now that he was dead I had to oversee a lot of s.h.i.t. I hadn't found anybody that was knowledgeable enough to maintain some of my important dealings that I also trusted. So the s.h.i.t was all falling on me. And when my mind was consumed with business the last thing I could make time for was a woman like Dior. She took high maintenance to another level and I didn't mean simply materialistic wise, but emotional too. If I got on the phone with her she'd drill me about getting all her s.h.i.t done and although I had every intention of coming through for her, right now it wasn't a priority for me. It wasn't even on my top five and I had no plans of talking to her until it was.

When I pulled up to my office building in Jersey City, I had this twinge of uneasiness. I wasn't sure if it was due to the edge not wearing off from the visit with my mother or something else. When I entered the building two of my security guards were in the lobby waiting for me. They nodded their head for me to go back outside so I made my exit and they followed behind me.

"What the f.u.c.k is going on?"

"We're not sure if the offices are secure."

"You think someone put a bug in the office?"

"We have our people up there checking now."

"So is that the situation?"

"That's part of it."

"What's the other part?"

"Alexus has been kidnapped and is being held for ransom."

"How much?"

"Two million."

"Who kidnapped Alexus and why do they think I would pay two million to get her back?"

"From my understanding this s.h.i.t all goes back to Darnell. The money he was stealing from you, he wasn't giving it to anybody. He was keeping it for himself. The two guys he was partnering up with, he took their money too."

"So if he was stealing from all of us, where is all the money?"

"n.o.body knows but them dudes want their money back and they somehow found out that Alexus wasn't Darnell's girl like they initially thought but that she actually worked for you."

"That's why you think the office might have a bug because they know this."

"Yes."

"How did they make contact?"

"It all went down right here."

"You talkin' 'bout today?"

"Yeah, right before I called you."

"Ok, Brice, I need you to take me through this s.h.i.t step by step."

"Michael and Roy were upstairs. Me, Tony and Alexus was coming into the building. What looked like a delivery truck pulled up. Two guys came out in uniforms carrying boxes. By the time I realized something wasn't right they had pulled out guns and told us to get on the ground. They called us out by our names. Then a third guy came out the back of the truck and grabbed Alexus. He said Darnell stole their money and they wanted it back. He told us if we didn't give them two million the next time we saw Alexus she'd be floating in the Hudson River."

"Did you get the plate number?"

"Yeah, as soon as we heard them drive off we jumped up and got the information. I was tempted to start blazing on they a.s.s but I knew they might end up killing Alexus and in this area, people hear gunshots they most def calling the police. I know we don't want them involved. "

"Nah, we definitely don't want that. So what did you come up with when you ran the plates?"'

"Nothing, they were bogus."

"I figured that. d.a.m.n," I huffed. "Even if I pay them cats, they might still kill Alexus. That foul n.i.g.g.a Darnell making problems for me even from the grave."

"So what do you want us to do?"

"Get the money together but something ain't adding up."

"What do you mean?"

"If Darnell had gotten that much money together, that s.h.i.t ain't just lying around somewhere. Where the f.u.c.k is it? The average n.i.g.g.a can't just hide two million dollars unless they just making up an amount tryna pinch me."

"Lorenzo, we found three bugs," Roy informed me as soon as he came out the building.

"How the f.u.c.k did they get up in my office and have time to do that s.h.i.t." I noticed Tony put his head down. "Tony something you need to say?"

"Last week I did allow a new cleaning crew to come in. I'm sorry. They told me the regular company had outsourced them because they needed a fill in. Everything seemed legitimate so I didn't second guess them. That had to be when they did it. Lorenzo, I'm so sorry."

"Thank f.u.c.kin' goodness we don't discuss no real business in that b.i.t.c.h 'cause the way you just opening doors to m.u.t.h.e.rf.u.c.ka's the feds would be hauling all of us off to jail! Fuuuuck!" I screamed out ready to put a bullet in Tony's head for being so careless.

"Lorenzo, I...."

"Yo, don't say s.h.i.t to me right now. All I want you to do," I said pointing towards Brice, "is get the money together and let me know when they contact you. When they do, inform them that you ain't giving them s.h.i.t until you get Alexus back alive. Then you find out what the f.u.c.k happened to that money Darnell stole and how much he got from them. You also find out who Darnell had partnered up with because after they give us Alexus, we will find them, take my money back and kill 'em. Now all of you get the f.u.c.k out my face."

"Lorenzo, what are you doing here? I thought you weren't coming until tomorrow."

"Can I come in?"

"Of course, I'm sorry, come in." Lala moved out the way and I came inside. When I left my office I didn't feel like going home and I found myself driving around thinking. I no longer wanted to think so I decided to come over and see Tania.

"Where's Tania?"

"Upstairs getting ready for bed."

"Can I go see her?"

"Yes, she'll be happy to see you." I went upstairs and Tania was in her bed, under the covers watching The Princess and the Frog. I sat down beside her and her entire face lit up.

"Uncle Lorenzo, I missed you," she hugged me and said. When her arms wrapped around me it felt like healing power. Her innocence sent calmness through me that I needed. I knew it would and that's why I came. In my world, surrounded by h.e.l.l right here on earth, having a child like Tania share the purity of her love was the only thing that saved me.

"I missed you too but now I'm here and I'm not leaving until you fall asleep."

"Then I'm never going to fall asleep because I don't want you to ever leave me."

"It's okay for you to go to sleep because I'll be back again."

"No you won't. You'll leave me like my daddy did and never come back."

"Tania, I put this on everything, I'll always come back for you."

"You promise?"

"I promise." She held on to me for dear life and I didn't let her go until she fell asleep in my arms. When I went downstairs Lala was sitting on the couch as if she'd been waiting for me.

"You were up there for a long time."

"Yeah, I wanted to stay until Tania went to sleep."

"That was sweet of you to do that."

"No, it was sweet of her to let me. I needed that time with her more than she probably needed it with me."

"What's going on with you?"

"Typical stress from work."

"There's nothing typical about your work, Lorenzo. Sit down. Let me get you something to drink."

"That would be good. And a shot of Hennessy would be even better."

"You're in luck." Lala came back out with a double shot of Hennessy and that s.h.i.t went down my throat so smoothly."

"I needed that, thank you."

"Let me make you feel better, Lorenzo." Lala was on her knees in front of me. Her face was so angelic as if she had never been through pain but I knew that wasn't true.

"You've already made me feel better."

"Let me do more," she said unb.u.t.toning my shirt.

"Don't do that," I said grasping her hands.

"Why won't you let me in?" I moved her hair from her face and glided my finger down her cheek.

"Because I have nothing to give."

"Well I do." Lala then pressed her lips against mine and the softness further relaxed me. I pulled her sweater over her head and my hands cupped her b.r.e.a.s.t.s as I let my tongue lick her hardened nipples. Lala's seductive moaning made my d.i.c.k even harder.

"I want to be inside of you."

"I've always wanted that," Lala said in a breathless voice before taking off her jeans and panties. As she stood in front of me I let my hands gently caress the thickness of each curve before I laid her down on the couch. At that moment I was pleased I stayed prepared by always keeping condoms in my wallet because I was ready to go in when she spread her legs open as if begging to let me in. "Ahhhh," echoed through the room as I filled her insides and her wet juices coated my d.i.c.k. Her p.u.s.s.y wasn't too wide or too tight, it was just right. As I went deeper and deeper and Lala's moans and groans of pleasure grew louder I knew since I went there, I could never turn my back on her.

Dior.

All Of The Lights.