CHAPTER.

TWENTY-SEVEN.

Ashley wAS NOT SURPRiSeD when she looked out the window the morning of her wedding day. The skies across Bloomington were bluer than she'd ever seen them.

As if God himself had peeled back the cloud layers so the angels would have a better view of today's events.

She lifted the window and breathed in the sweet summer air. Most of the time she did her praying at night or while she painted. But the slow and wondrous realization that today she would marry Landon Blake, that her mother would be at the ceremony, that all of them would be there together, was more than she could hold in her heart.

There was nothing she could do but drop to her knees, and she did so, staring into the blue and knowing that every moment, every second of that day would be forever etched on her soul.

God... you did it. All those weeks and months when I thought I couldn't have Landon, when my past hung over us like a dark cloud, an. d yet here we are. You and me, God.

Tears filled her eyes, tears of joy and certainty and a glorious feeling she'd never known before. She'd always wondered about 298 REUNION.

heaven, and as she stared into the sky she thought about Irvel. Was she watching even now? Did she have a front-row seat to watch Ashley give her heart to Landon the way she, Irvel, had once given her heart to Hank?

Ashley hoped so.

She liked thinking that people in heaven had a window to earth, a way to see what they needed to pray about, but through the tearless veil of heaven's understanding. If that was the case, then her mother was certainly not going to leave them one of these days. She would watch over them forever. Not in the way of an angel, of course, because people and angels were entirely different. But in a prayerful way that would stand as a reminder to each of the Baxters that their mother could go, but she could never quite leave.

Ashley smiled. Irvel would be one of the first people to find her mother, once she passed from this world to the next. They would share tea, no doubt, and talk about the joys of loving one man for all their earthly days.

A breeze sifted through the window and dried her cheeks. It would be the best day ever, a day when for just a little while longer they could all be together, the day when God in all his loving mercy would have the last word in the drama that had been her and Landon.

Lord, thank you. I know you'll be smiling on us today; I can already feel it.

Please, God, let my mother.feel it, too. Take away her pain so she can enjoy every moment. You say to ask anything in your name, according to your will, and you will hear. Please, God...

She glanced around the room and saw it standing in the corner. The painting she'd been working on since she found out the good news about her health. In the foreground were the backs of her and Landon-she in a flowing white dress, he in a dark suit. Between them was Cole, his little-boy, towheaded look, the one he was losing a little more each day. The three of them were holding hands, walking toward a brilliant sunrise that took up most of the painting. The colors were breathtaking, bright oranges and stun 299.

ning yellows, colors that represented the future they would have together.

She would give it to Landon tonight, when they were alone after the wedding. It would be one more moment to spend a lifetime remembering.

She rose to her feet, her eyes still on the brilliam blue sky. Then, as if she might burst if she didn't take action, she sprinted into Cole's room, threw her hands in the air, and squealed.

Cole moaned and the sound became a giggle. "Mommy, you look silly." He sat up and rubbed his eyes. "What are you doing?"

Ashley did a little circle dance and raised both fists into the air. "Come on, Cole, get up! We're getting married today!"

It was the strangest thing.

Elizabeth was sitting in the chair near her bed, watching her daughter's slip on their dresses, listening to their sweet conversation, and still she couldn't get over it. Ever since she'd awakened, the pain in her body was gone. Not diminished or lessened, not that she was merely getting used to it.

Rather it was completely gone.

She was tired and weak; no doubt she'd lost more weight. That much was obvious when John helped her into her gray linen dress, tire one she'd picked out sometime after her surgery. She was dressed, ready to go, but with none of the pain she'd expected to feel. She could sit there with the girls, watching them get ready for Ashley's wedding, without feeling anything but complete joy.

Ashley was the first to ask her about it. "You look better today, Mom."

"I am." Elizabeth lifted her hands and let them fall back to her lap. "I can't explain it, but I don't hurt like I did yesterday." The expression on Ashley's face changed. "Really?"

"Really." She ran her hands over her arms and legs. "The pain is gone."

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"Well, then-" Ashley bent down and kissed her cheek "let's have the best day ever."

Kari and Brooke and Erin and Reagan all had their dresses on. They worked each other's straps, helping with adjustments and making sure no undergarments showed. Earlier in the morning, a hairdresser from a small shop near the university had come and put the bridesmaids' hair up.

Each one of them looked like a vision, but none of them compared with Ashley.

Her hair was a cascade of ringlets, pinned up in a way that was soft and delicate, with tendrils framing her face.

"Okay," Kari made a final shift of her dress. "It's your turn, Ash."

"Right." Ashley pulled a white garment bag from Elizabeth's closet, unzipped it, and took out the dress. She held it out as each of the girls gathered around, touching the skirt and admiring the needlework on the bodice.

Elizabeth coughed twice and held her hand out toward Ashley. "I'm feeling well enough; can I help you, dear?"

The room fell quiet for a moment, and Kari sniffed.

"I'd love that, Mom." Ashley and the others moved the dress closer to Elizabeth.

At the same time, Erin was at her mother's side, helping her to her feet. They all lifted the dress and eased it over Ashley's hair. But Elizabeth wanted to do the buttons. She'd been thinking about this, practicing the move in her mind.

Since her hands didn't hurt, she set to work on the bottom button and gradually worked her way up.

"Can you believe it, Mom?" Ashley had her back to her, but she angled her face so they could see each other.

"I know I can." Kari dabbed at her eyes. "Landon has loved you since the first day he met you."

Brooke smiled. "Sort of like you and Ryan."

"Yes." Kari's cheeks glowed and sloe smiled at Ashley. "You're beautiful, little sister. Wait till he Sees you."

Elizabeth kept working the buttms, steady by Erin's side.

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kin gs b u r y s m a lie y "When you left for Paris, Ashley, I didn't know if you'd ever come back." Her words were thoughtful, drenched in the memory of those long-ago emotions. "And when you came home, I wondered the same thing."

"I'm sorry.' Ashley held her fingers to her eyes and murmered a sad-sounding laugh. "Glad my makeup's not on yet."

"No, I don't mean to make you sorry/' Elizabeth struggled with the buttons. She was tired, but nothing was going to stop her. She had dreamed about this moment too long to let anything get in the way. "I just mean look at how amazing God is. He kept Landon from going to New York City too early. If he would've gone when he was supposed to, he would've been in the twin towers that day."

"Like my dad." Reagan's eyes were damp also.

"Yes." Elizabeth paused and held her hand out to Reagan. "Like your dad."

Ashley breathed in and straightened herself. "I've thought about that."

"You see ... God had a plan for you all along." Elizabeth looked at the other girls. "He always has a plan for us; either to give us a hope and a future here in this world. Or-" she smiled and waited for her emotions to level out-"or in the next."

"It is amazing how things work out." Brooke sat on the edge of the bed near Elizabeth. "'Hayley is doing so much better. Drinking from a cup, eating solid food. We could've lost her, but God wasn't finished with her yet."

"That's what it comes down to." Elizabeth worked the last few buttons together.

She stopped to cough, but only for a moment. "He alone knows the number of our days, and until that moment, he always has a plan for us."

She fastened the last one and then held her breath. "Okay, turn around."

Kari picked up Ashley's train and fluffed it out behind her. Ashley made a slow spin to face Elizabeth. As she did, she smoothed out the front of the skirt and their eyes met. "Well..."

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Elizabeth covered her mouth, but only for a few seconds. "Ashley... you're absolutely gorgeous." She gave a slow shake of her head and put her hands on her daughter's shoulders. 'Remember what I said about God having a plan for us?"

"Yes." Ashley's eyes glowed, much like the rest of her. "You've always taught us that. God has a plan for his people as long as they draw breath."

"This" her voice grew tight and almost too silent to hear- "this is my miracle, Ashley. Seeing you get married. I'm still alive because God allowed this day to be part of his plans for me." She kissed Ashley's cheek. "What else could I ask for?"

Even as Elizabetb said the words, the answer came to mind. She could ask God to help her find her firstborn. But she quickly dismissed the thought. Here and now, seeing Ashley marry Landon would be more than enough.

The girls were talking a once again, marveling over the dress and the way Ashley looked in it. Whereas at one time in her life Ashley had worn beatnik clothing and refused anything even slightly mainstream, now she looked like she'd stepped off the cover of a bridal magazine.

They were all saying so when Cole burst into the room. He stopped when he saw Ashley, and suddenly his steps became slow and dreamy. "Mommy... you look like a princess."

"Thanks, honey." Ashley lowered herself to his level. "And look how handsome you are!"

The wedding was an hour away, and John had already dressed Cole in one of the upstairs rooms, the one where all the guys except for Landon were getting ready.

"I know. Papa says I look good and grown-up." His face fell some. "'Cept I'm a little nervous about my wedding."

Around the room the girls did a good job of hiding their smiles. Of course Cole would think it was his wedding. He'd wanted it even longer than Ashley had.

Ashley crooked her finger and rubbed it against Cole's chin. "What are you worried about, sport?"

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kingsbury smalley He angled his head and blinked. "I don't have the words yet." Kari, Brooke, Erin, and Reagan gathered closer. Ashley lowered her brow. "What words? You're the ring bearer, honey. You don't have to say any words at all."

Cole nodded his head emphatically. "Yes, Mommy. Landon said so."

Elizabeth pressed herself back into her chair, trying to keep from giggling.

"What did Landon say?" Ashley stood and took Cole's hands in hers.

They were a vision, facing each other that way. Cole drew circles on the floor with the toe of his shiny dress shoe. "He said after we say the vows, he'll be my daddy forever." Cole paused. "So what if I don't know the vows, Mommy. I haven't practiced like I practice my ABCs."

'Cole..." Ashley pulled him into a hug. "Landon and I say the vows, silly. You don't have to do anything but walk up with the ring pillow and stand there looking cute."

"Really, Mommy?"

She kissed the top of his head. "Really."

"Goody!" He raised a fist into the air, all boy despite the fancy clothes. He started to turn around, but he stopped himself. "After the vows part, can I call Landon my daddy?"

Elizabeth felt a rush of tears, but she held them back. Name or not, Landon had been Cole's father for years now. Ashley had told them that Landon already had the papers filled out to officially adopt Cole once they were married. He couldn't have loved Cole more if the boy had been his own.

"Yes, Cole." Ashley's voice was thick when she finally found the words to answer him. 'Yes, you can call him Daddy."

John could feel the presence of God around them.

It had been that way since this morning when Elizabeth first re 304 REUNION.

ported that for no reason at all, her pain was gone. But it was more than that.

In some ways, Ashley's wedding represented a coda on the past years of Baxter life. Just four years ago there were more questions than answers making up their family. Questions concerning Kari and Luke and Brooke and Erin. Even the harder questions regarding Ashley. Now the questions had been answered. God had come through on every front except one.

Elizabeth was dying. She wasn't getting the miracle they'd prayed for, and one day-when the wedding was over, when everything was over-he would spend some time with God and try to figure out why. Why it was necessary for her to die when everything in their lives had finally worked out.

The questions he had for God didn't leave John angry, just confused.

But that time would wait. For Ashley was getting married and in spite of all the ways he couldn't understand what God was doing with Elizabeth,John could feel his presence all around them.

The ceremony was set to start in twenty minutes. All the other guys had gone on to the church, so just the women remained. John had hired a limousine for the occasion, a stretch that would seat him and Elizabeth, the bridesmaids, and Ashley and Cole.

He stood near the front door and cupped his mouth. "Time to go." Familiarity surrounded the moment. This was how he'd felt when Kari and Erin and Brooke got married. This rushed, exhilarated feeling that they'd entered a countdown. That in less than an hour he would give away his daughter, that when the day was over, she would bear another man's name.

And now he was doing the entire routine for the last time.

Erin led the way down the stairs with Elizabeth on her arm. "We're all coming."

A trail of his daughters and Reagan followed, each of them stunning. His eyes locked on to Elizabeth's and held. They had always been able to speak without words, and this moment was no different. As beautiful as the girls around her were, Elizabeth was the most striking. With her fashionable beret-this 305 kingsbry smalley blue-gray like her dress-and her delicate features, she was still the only woman who could take his breath away.