[Prays, crossing himself.

FIRST PEASANT. If only by G.o.d's help we get our business settled!

(Lies down.) Then to-morrow, after dinner, we'd be off by the train, and on Tuesday we'd be home again.

SECOND PEASANT. Are you going to put out the light?

SERVANTS' COOK. Put it out? Oh, no! They'll keep running down here, first for one thing then another.... You lie down, I'll lower it.

SECOND PEASANT. How is one to live, having so little land? Why, this year, I have had to buy corn since Christmas. And the oat-straw is all used up. I'd like to get hold of ten acres, and then I could take Simon back.

THIRD PEASANT. You're a man with a family. You'd get the land cultivated without trouble. If only the business comes off.

SECOND PEASANT. We must pray to the Holy Virgin, maybe she'll help us out. (Silence, broken by sighs. Then footsteps and voices are heard outside. The door opens. Enter GROSSMAN hurriedly, with his eyes bandaged, holding SAHaTOF'S hand, and followed by the PROFESSOR and the DOCTOR, the FAT LADY and LEONiD FYoDORITCH, BETSY and PETRiSTCHEF, VASiLY LEONiDITCH and MaRYA KONSTANTiNOVNA, ANNA PaVLOVNA and the BARONESS, THEODORE IVaNITCH and TaNYA.)

[PEASANTS jump up. GROSSMAN comes forward stepping quickly, then stops.

FAT LADY. You need not trouble yourselves; I have undertaken the task of observing, and am strictly fulfilling my duty! Mr. Sahatof, are you not leading him?

SAHaTOF. Of course not!

FAT LADY. You must not lead him, but neither must you resist! (To LEONiD FYoDORITCH.) I know these experiments. I have tried them myself. Sometimes I used to feel a certain effluence, and as soon as I felt it....

LEONiD FYoDORITCH. May I beg of you to keep perfect silence?

FAT LADY. Oh, I understand so well! I have experienced it myself. As soon as my attention was diverted I could no longer....

LEONiD FYoDORITCH. Sh...!

[GROSSMAN goes about, searches near the FIRST and SECOND PEASANTS, then approaches the THIRD, and stumbles over a bench.

BARONESS. Mais dites-moi, on le paye?[6]

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Je ne saurais vous dire.

BARONESS. Mais c'est un monsieur?

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Oh, oui!

BARONESS. ca tient du miraculeux. N'est ce pas? Comment est-ce qu'il trouve?

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Je ne saurais vous dire. Mon mari vous l'expliquera.

(Noticing PEASANTS, turns round, and sees the SERVANTS' COOK.) Pardon ... what is this?

[BARONESS goes up to the group.

ANNA PaVLOVNA. (to SERVANTS' COOK). Who let the peasants in?

SERVANTS' COOK. Jacob brought them in.

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Who gave Jacob the order?

SERVANTS' COOK. I can't say. Theodore Ivanitch has seen them.

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Leonid!

[LEONiD FYoDORITCH does not hear, being absorbed in the search, and says, Sh....

ANNA PaVLOVNA. Theodore Ivanitch! What is the meaning of this? Did you not see me disinfecting the whole hall, and now the whole kitchen is infected, all the rye bread, the milk....

THEODORE IVaNITCH. I thought there would not be any danger if they came here. The men have come on business. They have far to go, and are from our village.

ANNA PaVLOVNA. That's the worst of it! They are from the Koursk village, where people are dying of diphtheria like flies! But the chief thing is, I ordered them out of the house!... Did I, or did I not? (Approaches the others that have gathered round the PEASANTS.) Be careful! Don't touch them--they are all infected with diphtheria!

[No one heeds her, and she steps aside in a dignified manner and stands quietly waiting.

PETRiSTCHEF (sniffs loudly). I don't know if it is diphtheria, but there is some kind of infection in the air. Don't you notice it?

BETSY. Stop your nonsense! Vovo, which bag is it in?

VASiLY LEONiDITCH. That one, that one. He is getting near, very near!

PETRiSTCHEF. Is it spirits divine, or spirits of wine?

BETSY. Now your cigarette comes in handy for once. Smoke closer, closer to me.

[PETRiSTCHEF leans over her and smokes at her.

VASiLY LEONiDITCH. He's getting near, I tell you. Eh, what?

GROSSMAN (searches excitedly round the THIRD PEASANT). It is here; I feel it is!

FAT LADY. Do you feel an effluence?

[GROSSMAN stoops and finds the spoon in the bag.

ALL. Bravo!

[General enthusiasm.

VASiLY LEONiDITCH. Ah! So that's where our spoon was. (To PEASANTS.) Then that's the sort you are!

THIRD PEASANT. What sort? I didn't take your spoon! What are you making out? I didn't take it, and my soul knows nothing about it. I didn't take it--there! Let him do what he likes. I knew he came here for no good. "Where's your bag?" says he. I didn't take it, the Lord is my witness! (Crosses himself.) I didn't take it!

[The young people group round the PEASANT, laughing.

LEONiD FYoDORITCH (angrily to his son). Always playing the fool! (To the THIRD PEASANT.) Never mind, friend! We know you did not take it; it was only an experiment.

GROSSMAN (removes bandage from his eyes, and pretends to be coming to). Can I have a little water?