Pegasus: A Novel - Part 3
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Part 3

"I'm not," she confirmed, "but neither are you, in any real way."

"That's not what they believe, or exactly correct. I'm part of the race they want to stamp out. According to them, it's a race of criminals and half-breeds."

"Will I ever see you again?" she asked sadly, and he looked at her for a long moment before he answered.

"Probably not," he said quietly. "I don't see how. You'll have a nice visit with your sister and her baby, when it's born. And you'll go back to Germany, to the life you know, that your husband gave you. And I'll be here, in the circus. Not *at' the circus, in it, just like the clowns."

"Don't say that," she scolded him with a catch in her voice. She felt so sorry for him.

"Why not? It's true. And I'd better get used to it quickly. That's not a life you want, Monique." She didn't deny it because what he said was correct. "We can write to each other. But for now, that's the best I can do." She realized now that the reason he had held back till then, even from kissing her to any great extent, was because of everything he had just explained, not because of her. He had been so distant with her at first, except on the dance floor, and now she knew why. He had been nothing but a gentleman with her, out of respect and kindness. He didn't want to pull her into his mess, or the life he was about to lead. He didn't even want her to see it, and he knew she never would. She would go back to Germany in a month and lead the life she had, since marrying her husband. A life that Nick would never live again. He had been born into it, and she hadn't. But she had been allowed to stay and he was a refugee now. The irony and unfairness of that did not elude either of them.

Nick liked Monique, and the fact that she was straightforward with him. And she liked him for being truthful as well. He hadn't tried to cover up what was happening to him, and he was bitter about it, but not with her. He was as lovely as she had thought at first. Even better now. He wasn't just a handsome, dashing aristocrat, he was a real human being. And she was sorry to hear everything that was happening to him. She felt now as though she'd made a friend. He kissed her again then, but there was no pa.s.sion to it. She was a pretty woman, but suddenly their lives were too different. As a circus performer, he didn't feel very dashing. He felt anything but, as he kissed her on the cheek, chastely this time, and then walked back to his own cabin. It was hard to imagine what his life would be like now, but surely like nothing he had ever known. And he wasn't anxious to find out.

He lay awake in his bed for a long time that night, and finally he put a coat on over his pajamas, and went outside to stand at the rail. It was nearly daybreak by then, and the sun came up slowly as they steamed into New York Harbor. The rest of the pa.s.sengers were asleep, and he watched as they slid by the Statue of Liberty. The tugboats had come to lead them in, and at seven o'clock in a bright morning sun, they pulled into the dock. They had arrived. And whether he felt ready for it or not, their new life had begun.

Chapter 7.

Nick made sure that the horses were all safely tethered, and Toby helped him clean out their stalls before they disembarked. Lucas gave them all water, as his father had shown him how to do, and oats in their feed bags. Nick commented that the three of them had become able stable boys during the long trip. And he watched closely, once he was dressed, as the crane lowered the boxcar carefully onto the dock.

From the pier on the Hudson River, the boxcar would be taken to the station, and their trip to Sarasota would begin. Nick barely had time to find Monique to say goodbye, before he left to join the boys in the car he had hired to take them to the station. He found her as her endless stack of steamer and cabin trunks was being removed by cabin boys and porters. She was wearing a heavy fur coat, and a spectacular hat with a veil, and white kid gloves.

"You look very beautiful," he said, smiling at her. "Thank you for our lovely evenings. I haven't danced that much in years." And he realized that, mostly thanks to her, the respite from reality on the boat had done him good. It was his final farewell to a life he had been forced to give up, and he had enjoyed spending time with her.

"Take care of yourself," she said, looking longingly at him, wishing things were different, but they weren't. "Write to me sometime."

"I will," he promised, but neither of them was sure they would, and he thought it unlikely. What could he possibly have to say that would interest her now, in her safe world in her husband's schloss in the Tyrol, once she returned from Boston? In a strange way, she had inherited the life he had been born to, and he had lost it. They were ships pa.s.sing in the night. He kissed her gently on the cheek through her veil, smiled, and then was gone, as she stood watching from the rail as he got into the car with his boys. Lucas was hanging out the window, looking up at the ship they had just left, and a flatbed truck was carrying the boxcar with the horses. Nick had stolen a minute to thank Beauregard Thompson for his kindness and support during Pluto's experience of nearly dying. They shook hands, and the horseman from Kentucky wished him luck.

As they drove to Penn Station, Lucas was gazing out the window, fascinated by everything he saw and chattering excitedly, while Toby drifted into pensive silence. Nick kept a lookout to make sure that the boxcar was stable and the luggage car was following with their trunks. He had never had to handle so many details and arrangements on his own. Until then, servants and underlings had handled everything he had to cope with now himself, and he had a new respect for how talented and dedicated they had been, and how complicated it was to manage all the details, particularly with the horses. And as they hurried to their train, he stopped at a Western Union office in the station to send telegrams to his father and Alex, saying that they had arrived safely in New York. Lucas was insisting that he wanted to see the city, the Chrysler Building, and the Empire State Building, which was the tallest building in New York, and Nick said they didn't have time.

It seemed like a herculean feat to get the boxcar onto the Seaboard Air Line Railway train, and half an hour later they were settled into their compartment with their trunks all around them. It was a relief when they finally left the station, even though they had seen nothing of New York. Nick couldn't help thinking of Monique, on her way to Boston, and how simple her life was. She could return to Germany whenever she wanted, and he and his sons had fled. The cruelty of fate didn't escape him, but it was the way of the world now. He thought, too, about his mother, as they rode south on the train. He would have liked to try to find her before he left Germany, but he hadn't had time. And in an odd way, for the first time he felt angry at her for abandoning him, but she'd been a young girl, probably with no choice in the matter. He was determined to find her one day, and meet her, but he knew that now it was a long way off, if he could ever return to Germany at all. If Hitler remained in power, Nick would be a man without a country for the rest of his life.

"We're not going back, are we?" Toby said softly, once Lucas fell asleep from the rhythmic motion of the train, several hours out from New York.

"I don't know," Nick said honestly. He didn't want to lie to him and give him false hope. "It depends on what happens in Germany. For now, we have to make our home here." They had no other choice.

"With the circus? Forever?" Toby was appalled.

"For a while."

"I miss Opa," Toby said sadly, and Nick nodded. He missed his father too. Terribly. And Alex. And their comfortable home and life.

"So do I. I'm sure he misses us too," Nick said sadly, as the train to Florida rolled on.

It was long after dinnertime when Nick's telegram arrived at the manor house at the schloss that night. Paul had decided to remain where he was-the main house would be too lonely now without Nick and the boys, so he didn't move back. And staying in the manor house was a way of convincing himself they would return. The main schloss was their home.

He was relieved to read in the telegram that they had arrived safely in New York, and were on their way to Florida with the horses in good condition. Nick had signed it from him and the boys, and Paul had tears in his eyes when he read it. His life had been bleak for the past five days without them. He couldn't even imagine a whole lifetime without them now, and he had aged visibly ten years overnight.

When Alex got Nick's telegram at Schloss Altenberg, he showed it to Marianne, who had been sitting in the library with him. And they had been nearly as lonely as Nick's father. Nick and the boys' absence was sorely felt in everyone's life. Alex was relieved to read that the horses had traveled without mishap. Nick hadn't told him that Pluto nearly died. It would only have worried Alex for no reason, since all was well now, and Pluto seemed healthier than ever. At least for now, their future was safe.

When the train made several stops as it wended its way south, Nick got out and checked the horses, and gave them fresh water. The boys were excited to have dinner in the dining car, and afterward the porter set up their sleepers. They weren't due to arrive in Sarasota until the next morning, and would be traveling through the night. And Lucas loved the little blue light over his bed in the compartment. He thought everything about the trip was exciting. And Toby cheered up a little after dinner, as they watched the countryside slide by. Nick was exhausted by the stress of their travel, and constantly worried about either his sons or the horses. There seemed to be so much to take care of now. He had had no idea how complicated running one's own life was, and he was not enjoying the process. No matter how bad it was, it would be good to get to Florida, and finally stop moving around. He felt as though they were coming from the far end of the earth to get there. And they hadn't arrived yet. He was grateful that they wouldn't have to travel again for the next three months, since the circus was settled in its winter quarters, and wasn't leaving on tour until March. After that they would be on the move, going from city to city, for nine months. But they would have time to adapt to their new life now, with only a light schedule of occasional performances in Sarasota. It would give him and the boys a chance to adjust and settle in, and perfect their act. He wished Alex were there to help him improve further, and tried to remember everything Alex had taught him about putting the Lipizzaners through their paces.

And after not sleeping at all the night before on the ship, Nick fell into a deep sleep on the train, with the hypnotic rhythm and the sounds of the wheels on the track. It was morning, in a bright sun, when they finally got there. Nick had woken the boys an hour before, so they could dress and have breakfast, in the dining car again. Lucas ordered nearly everything on the menu, and tried to order in German. Nick forced him to use his halting English instead of translating for him. Toby had learned enough English to speak a little, although not well. He had to struggle for his words, but the people he spoke to were patient about it. Nick let Lucas order for all of them, and he did a decent job of it, and got everything right, except for the pancakes, which he called "crepes" and confused the waiter. Both boys spoke a smattering of French, which they'd learned from a nanny they'd had when they were younger and still remembered, and enough English to get by.

When the train finally stopped in the Sarasota station, they felt as though they'd been traveling for weeks or months, not a mere six days on the ship and twenty hours on the train. There were roustabouts from the circus removing the boxcar, when Nick got off the train with the boys, and two porters carrying their trunks. He had no idea what to do next, when a man in a shiny blue suit, a lavender shirt, and a red tie came up to them, wearing a fedora pushed back on his head, and brandishing a foul-smelling cigar like a magic wand.

"Mr. von Bingen?" he asked, and the two boys stared at the man, silently echoing their father's unspoken thoughts. They had never seen anyone like him. The man smiled broadly the moment Nick acknowledged who he was. It was obvious that the man in the shiny blue suit was from the circus, and had come to meet them. And he confirmed that the moment he spoke.

"Welcome to Florida and the Greatest Show on Earth," he said grandly, waving the cigar in Lucas's face. The boy scrunched up his nose at the evil smell and turned away, while his father shook the man's hand.

"Thank you for coming to meet us," Nick said sincerely, grateful for the help.

"Of course. Joe Herlihy," he said, pumping Nick's hand until Nick thought his arm would fall off. Joe instructed the handlers to load the boxcar onto the flatbed truck he had brought with him. The logo of the circus was emblazoned on the door of the panel truck he was driving, and it was strange to see it now. It made everything suddenly seem more real. "How did the horses do on the trip?"

"Surprisingly well," Nick said in the clipped British accent he had when he spoke English, because that was where he had learned it, in boarding school. The man with the cigar spoke in a Southern drawl that was hard for Nick to understand.

"Do the boys speak English?" Joe asked with interest and a friendly glance over his shoulder at the boys in the backseat of the truck. The boxcar was following on the flatbed.

"A little. They're learning. We came over on a German boat, so they really haven't had to speak it yet," Nick explained.

"They can go for years without ever learning it here," Joe said with a grin. "We have thirty-two nationalities at the circus, and over thirteen hundred performers and workers. It's a small village, or actually not so small, maybe more like a small city." When he spoke, he did so with obvious pride. "I've been with them for twelve years. I'm usually a scout, in the States anyway. Mr. North does the scouting and hiring himself in Europe. And they use me to meet and greet sometimes, for people like you. We have a lot of Germans, as well as Czechs, Poles, and Hungarians-they all speak German too. You should feel right at home there." Nick knew it was going to take more than a common language for him to adjust to his new colleagues and surroundings, but if many of them spoke German, it would be nice for the boys, and he knew Lucas would be relieved. He wanted to make friends quickly, he always did. Toby wanted to practice his English, and so did Nick. There were a lot of American expressions he didn't understand. "There are many French, Italian, and Spanish too. We have a group of j.a.panese acrobats, and a family of Chinese gymnasts and jugglers. They speak English, although I can hardly understand them. And almost all of the big cat acts are German. It must be very popular in your country." Nick smiled as he said it. If it was, Nick had never heard about it. He had never known any lion tamers at home, nor acrobats or jugglers. He couldn't even remotely imagine what they would be like. But he was about to find out.

Both boys were wide-eyed as they drove through Sarasota. It was a pretty little town, and Joe pointed out minor landmarks to them. As it turned out, it was a short drive to the winter headquarters at the fairground, and when they got there, Nick saw a huge spread of land of many acres that was teeming with activity. There was a gigantic tent, a big top, where their performances would be while they were there. There were menageries, tents, practice rings, workshops, railroad yards, and what looked like a sea of trailers in several vast parking lots. There were hundreds of them. And they rolled past the gates of an enormous structure that looked like a house, only bigger, which Joe said was Ca' d'Zan, and appeared to be a Venetian palace sitting on the bay.

"The Ringlings live there," he explained. Nick already knew that they owned the circus, and that John Ringling North had become president the year before, after his uncle John Ringling died. It was entirely a family-run business, with six of the actual Ringling brothers presiding. They had bought the Barnum & Bailey Circus many years before, in 1907, and the Ringlings were now in full control. They had merged two powerful, successful circuses and turned them into an astounding whole, with more than thirteen hundred employees, more than eight hundred animals, a hundred and fifty-two wagons, and a fifty-nine-car train. And everywhere Nick looked were people in odd costumes, women and young girls in tutus and ballet clothes, and men and women in gymnastic clothes. There had been a rehearsal for the clowns that day, and Lucas stared at them as they walked by. They were talking animatedly with each other, followed by dogs in varying shapes and sizes, in funny outfits, that were part of their act.

"We have more horses than any other animal. But yours are the only Lipizzaners in the country," Joe explained to him. Nick looked around when they got out of the car-it seemed more like ten or twelve circuses banded together in one location. It was more circus and everything that went with it than any of them could have dreamed.

"Wow! It's so big!" Toby whistled softly, and his father was thinking the same thing. It looked as though one could easily get lost there. Lucas was jumping up and down, wanting to meet the clowns.

"You'll meet everyone eventually," Joe rea.s.sured both boys. "And there are lots of kids for you to play with. You'll all be tutored together once we're on the road. When we're in Sarasota, all the performers' children go to the local schools. There are too many of them for just one school. And you two boys will be going to school too." It suddenly appeared to be a real community, with families, not just all the odd characters in the circus.

"We're actually here for the winter early this year. We had an actors' strike that shut us down till almost July. So we came down to our winter quarters earlier than usual, although we did a few extra shows in the Midwest." It had turned out to be a blessing for Nick, since they were already there and not still on tour when they arrived. "And I think we're going to leave later this spring, which will give you plenty of time to rehea.r.s.e and settle in before we tour. We usually start in February or March. We're planning on early April now. We open in New York."

Joe checked a note he had in his pocket, and looked up the number of their trailer, and consulted a map in order to find it. It was in the third enormous parking lot, and when the truck pulled up next to it, Nick noticed that it was particularly long, although not very wide. And when they stepped into it, it looked like an inexpensive hotel room, but it had everything they would need.

His breath caught as they walked into the trailer. This was their new home, and he had never seen anything like it, with two tiny bedrooms and a miniature kitchen. His parking s.p.a.ce for the Duesenberg had been bigger than this, and he tried not to let what he was feeling show on his face. The boys peeked into the bedrooms, exploring. Lucas seemed satisfied, and was anxious to go outside and meet the children he'd just seen wandering around. They had just come home from school on several school buses. Toby collapsed on the trailer's only couch with an exhausted, dazed expression. Everything was simple and clean, but none of them had ever realized that people actually lived like this. Nick reminded himself that if they had been sent to a labor camp, it would have been far worse. Or if they had been forced to leave their estate, as Jews. Where would they have gone?

"We have a tent set up on the fairgrounds for your horses. We got it as close to your trailer as we could. It's warm, so they'll be fine in a tent. We'll use a trailer for them when they're on the road. We can store your boxcar here, or put it on one of the trains," he informed Nick, who nodded. He was feeling overwhelmed by all the information and the tiny trailer they'd be living in, which was generous by circus standards. The two bedrooms were the size of the beds. It was all so vastly different from anything they'd ever known, and Toby looked like he was about to burst into tears, which Nick hoped he wouldn't. It would upset Lucas if he saw his older brother distraught. And Nick had to worry about both of them now. He tried to put a good face on it for their sake. He then asked Joe to show him to the tent where their horses were, so he could tend to them. He suggested that Toby and Lucas come with him, to keep them busy.

"Mr. North wants to see you at four this afternoon," Joe told Nick. "I'll pick you up and take you to meet him. And you have rehearsal at ten tomorrow morning. He'll be attending that as well. You're an important act for us," he said generously. "He likes to see all the acts when they come in. He particularly likes horses, so I'm sure he'll enjoy yours. He's a very accomplished horseman himself. And he wants to see your Lipizzaners."

"I hope he likes our performance," Nick said vaguely. He couldn't imagine being able to find his way around the maze of trailers, tents, workers, performers, and roving bands of people who swarmed the area like ants. He had never seen so many people in one place in his life. The boys were fascinated by it. Nick saw Toby watching a group of girls in ballet costumes with sparkles on them. They were pretty girls with good figures, and he hoped that would cheer them up a little. And Nick suddenly found himself missing Monique, who was at least familiar with his world. He felt as though he had been dropped on another planet, nothing looked like anything he'd ever seen before. Even the tropical landscape was strange and different, and it was warm.

Joe pointed out the cookhouse in another huge tent, where they could get their meals, or they could cook their own in the trailer if they preferred, but none of them knew how. Nick had never cooked in his life, and he'd have to learn that, too, if he was going to feed the boys. Going to the mess tent with hundreds of people for every meal sounded exhausting to him. And he realized quickly that the one thing they would lack here was privacy. There were so many people, living so close, seemingly on top of each other. He could touch with his hand the next trailer from his own. It would be hard to get away for a quiet moment alone, or have a family life that hundreds of people weren't encroaching on.

After Joe left, they walked a short distance to the tent where their horses had been put in stalls and safely tethered. They turned their heads when Nick and the boys entered, and Pluto shook his fiercely the moment he saw Nick, as though to say h.e.l.lo to him, and Nick smiled. Here was something familiar at last. He went quickly to the big stallion and stroked him, deriving more comfort from touching him than he was giving. He needed to see Pluto at that moment, and Nina, and the others. They were the final gift from his lost life, a last piece of Alex, a tiny remnant of the world they had known that had disappeared so quickly and so totally, on the other side of an ocean, in a country where they weren't welcome anymore. This was all that was left. Eight horses, and his two children.

They decided to stay and curry the horses before they went back to the trailer. He put a bridle on Pluto that someone had taken out of the boxcar and hung on a hook near his stall. There was a makeshift tack room in the tent, and their feed had been put in it.

A moment later Nick slipped onto the stallion's back, and suddenly as he sat there, life felt real to him again. Whatever else happened, or wherever they went, they had this. Each other and the horses Alex had given him. He had Pluto who had come back to life for him, and as he leaned down close to the horse's head, he whispered "thank you," and knew that for now, the Lipizzaner was his only friend in this frighteningly unfamiliar world. The Lipizzaner stallion would carry them through. He already had, when he decided to get back up on his feet again. And for that, and for this opportunity, Nick was infinitely grateful, no matter how strange it all seemed.

Chapter 8.

Although he made every effort not to let it show, Nick was nervous before his meeting with John Ringling North, "Mr. John," as Joe called him. He had no idea what to expect, any more than he knew what life in the circus would be like. He felt like he'd been dropped onto a different planet, as he watched hundreds of circus performers and employees milling around, talking to each other in groups, or heading for rehearsals in costumes or workout clothes. He had heard the tigers roaring that afternoon, and a string of elephants had walked by when he and the boys went back to the trailer. Everything they saw was unusual, new, and different.

Joe Herlihy came to meet Nick at the horses' tent later that afternoon to pick him up for the meeting. And he looked admiringly at the beautiful white stallion.

"The two Lipizzaners are incredible," he said, as he watched Toby brush Pluto. The stallion tossed his head back with a loud whinny, as though saying thank you. "They do a liberty act, don't they?" he inquired, which meant they responded to voice commands and signals.

"Yes, but I also ride them," Nick answered. Nina was easier to ride, she was older and calmer and had had more training. But Pluto was more exciting.

"That must be a sight to see. Your older boy too?" Nick nodded. Alex had worked with Toby before they left. He was no circus performer, but he rode very well, and had all his life. And he had taught Lucas a few simple tricks so he could join the act if the circus wanted him to.

"The Arabians are all liberty trained too." Nick smiled at Joe, who, if possible, was wearing an even louder suit than the one he had worn that morning. It was gray with a silver sheen to it. He was portly, and there was a lot of it, and he was wearing a bright blue tie and a pink shirt. But it looked almost normal against the backdrop of the circus and the oddly clad people all around them, many of them in bright colors and costumes. Nick was wearing an impeccable suit from his tailor in Berlin for his meeting with John Ringling North. He had no idea what to expect or why the president, who was the owner of the circus, wanted to meet him.

Before they left, Nick told Toby he'd meet him at their trailer afterward, and to keep an eye on Lucas. He had been exuberant all day and said he wanted to meet all the clowns. To Nick it felt surreal that he now lived among them, and they were about to become part of his everyday life. Lucas, of course, was thrilled, and Toby didn't know what to think. He had barely spoken since they'd arrived. He seemed to still be on some kind of emotional overload from the trip, and the strange place where they'd landed.

Nick rode in Joe's panel truck with the circus logo on it, and a few minutes later they got out and walked into a building on the fairgrounds. Joe led him to North's office, where two secretaries looked as sober and respectable as they would have in any lawyer's office or bank. And a moment later, when John Ringling North came out, he was wearing a dark pinstriped suit, similar to Nick's although not as well tailored, a white shirt, a dark blue tie, and impeccably shined shoes. He had a good haircut and wavy black hair and a wide smile as he greeted Nick pleasantly and shook his hand and invited him in. At least here Nick felt as though he were in a familiar world. John Ringling North was serious and well spoken, and looked like an intelligent man. He invited Nick to sit down across the desk from him. Joe had vanished when they walked in.

"Welcome to Florida, and to Ringling Brothers," the president of the circus said kindly. "I hope you had a good trip, and your horses traveled well."

"They did," Nick a.s.sured him, trying not to think of Pluto's nearly dying during the storm. But he was fine now, and in good health. "I wanted to thank you," Nick said quickly. "I am very grateful to you for sponsoring me and my sons. You saved our lives, literally. Germany is not a safe place to be these days. For us, anyway. It all happened very quickly for me and my family, and we were warned to leave as soon as we could. You helped us do that."

"I understood that from your letter," John North said carefully. "I have to admit, I was a little confused though. People with a last name like yours, with a *von,' are not usually subject to religious persecution. What's going on now in Germany? Were there some political issues I don't know about? Were you vocally opposed to the current government?" He knew that some were, with potentially disastrous results.

"I only discovered a few weeks ago that my mother, who I've never met, was half Jewish. It changed everything for us overnight. We were at great risk. We received a private warning from the Wehrmacht, the army, from a friend of my father's, to leave. He's a general and he did us a great favor by alerting us to the impending danger. He said things are going to get much worse. And if you are a Jew they're already pretty bad." He had begun to learn that firsthand. "And with my ancestry, that I never knew about, my boys and I were suddenly at great risk. You can't predict how far that kind of hatred and prejudice will go. They might have wanted to make an example of me and my boys, and show that even aristocrats who turn out to be Jews won't be tolerated and aren't welcome in Hitler's Germany." John Ringling North looked distressed by what he said, but not surprised. He had heard similar stories recently, and they had hired other Jewish performers who had left Germany in the past few years. Despite all they had left behind, after 1935, they thought it was safer and wiser to get out.

"You and your horses will be a great addition to the show. We've never had Lipizzaners before, there are none in this country, although I'm familiar with them. They'll be a treat for our audiences to see. Beautiful beasts. I'm anxious to see yours. You'll go on before the intermission with the animal acts. The high-wire acts and performers go on afterward. We generally open with the big cats in the center ring. I'd like to bring you out right after that, also in the center ring." It was a great honor, which Nick didn't yet know. "Which also brings up the matter of your name. We travel all over the country, to big cities and small towns. Americans aren't good with foreign names, and we'd like to give you a name they can remember. I was wondering if you'd mind shortening your name to Nick Bing-just as a stage name, of course. And I was also wondering if you have a t.i.tle." The "von" suggested that he did, or might. Nick looked embarra.s.sed when North asked, and startled by the change of name. But Nick Bing certainly did sound American, and would be easier to remember than von Bingen.

"Actually, my father has a t.i.tle, but he doesn't use it. He's much more modern in his thinking, and he finds it unnecessary. He's a count."

"We could use that," North said pensively. "Count Nick Bing. The count," he tried it on as he said it. "Would you prefer duke?"

"Actually, no," Nick said modestly about claiming to be a duke, which sounded embarra.s.singly pretentious to him. "Do I really need a t.i.tle?" He was horrified at the dishonesty and arrogance of it. He was a viscount, thanks to his father, but seldom if ever used the t.i.tle.

"It's theatrical, and Americans love royalty. Let's settle for count. The Count, Nick Bing. I think that'll work. And what about your horses' names, the two Lipizzaners?" North was responsible for the successful financial operation of the circus, but he was also acutely aware of all the more important performers, who they were, and what they did. He knew everything about the circus, and attended performances often. And he traveled with them when they were on the road, in his ornate private Pullman car with a silver dome. He had become president a year before, and was doing an excellent job running the complex operation. And he intended to watch Nick's rehearsal the next morning in the main tent. It was a command performance.

"The stallion is Pluto Petra, and the mare is Nina. They follow tradition in that the stallion is named for his sire and dam, mares only have one name, but their names always represent their bloodlines. They're easier to follow that way. And in the purist tradition, there are six names of the original stallions that date back to the eighteenth century. Breeders of Lipizzaners are very proud of their ancestry, and very solemn about their names."

"I'm sure that's true," North said respectfully, "but we don't want your stallion sounding like a cartoon character. And I'm afraid that Pluto will remind them of the dog in the Disney cartoons. We want something a little grander. Maybe you can think of a better name for each of them. We want to start advertising and putting out stories about your stallion as soon as possible. Maybe some press interviews and photographs with you, before we go on tour. It won't be for another five months, but I like to plan ahead. See what you can come up with for both of them. What about the Arabians?"

"They all have Arab names, which relate to their bloodlines too."

"That'll work," he approved. They discussed salary then, and what he offered Nick was respectable, although not staggering. But Nick hadn't expected it to be. It would be enough for him and the boys to live on, and the circus provided them many benefits, the trailer to live in, free food at the cook tent, and health care when needed. There would be no luxuries, but they would be protected and secure, and he was employed, which seemed miraculous to him.

"Thank you very much," Nick said with considerable emotion. He was grateful for all of it, and particularly that he and the boys were safe, no matter how unusual their situation was. He had never expected to join a circus, but his life had been full of surprises recently. And Ringling Brothers was the least of them. He had given up a country and a way of life, left his family and his home, become a criminal due to circ.u.mstances beyond his control, and discovered that the mother he had mourned all his life wasn't dead after all and had relinquished him at birth. It was a lot to digest and absorb.

"I'm looking forward to your rehearsal tomorrow morning," John Ringling North said warmly as he escorted Nick out of his office. "I'll have the contract ready for you. We'll give it to you after the rehearsal." Nick was well aware that he was still on trial, and there would be no contract if the president didn't like their performance. He was going to have Toby ride with him, and have Pluto go through everything Alex had taught him so carefully. He just hoped that the stallion would be willing to give it his utmost in the unfamiliar surroundings. Nick was going to have a talk with him that afternoon. He was nervous about the circus president watching the show. What if he didn't hire him after all? Then what would they do? It didn't bear thinking. He couldn't go back to Germany now. His performance with Pluto was going to have to be outstanding if there were to be a contract.

After the meeting, Nick found Joe in the parking lot, leaning against his truck and smoking a cigar. He was wearing a light gray fedora to match his suit, which, as always, was pushed back on his head. It was a perfect look for him, and he smiled at Nick as he approached.

"How did it go?"

"Well, I think. He's coming to our rehearsal. And he changed my name." Nick grinned wryly-he had expected none of this. He hadn't known what to expect at all. "I'm Nick Bing now."

"It suits you. Sounds a bit British, like your accent when you speak English." They both laughed.

"I hope he likes our act," Nick said nervously as he got into the truck with him. Joe was about his age, and seemed to understand how Nick felt, and he was trying to make Nick and the boys feel welcome and at home.

"Don't worry. He'll like it, I'm sure." Joe tried to rea.s.sure him.

"He wants me to change the Lipizzaners' names too. The man who bred them would kill me for that, but I don't have much choice, do I?" Nick glanced at Joe questioningly, and Joe looked sympathetic. This was a whole new world for Nick, and it showed. Most of the performers they hired, except a few very young ones, had been in circuses before.

"The circus is all about drama and excitement, *hype' we call it. Everything is bigger and better and more dramatic, or smaller and more exotic. I figured he'd want you to change Pluto's name," Joe commented as he started the truck.

"I'll try to think of something." But he had no intention of telling Alex once he did. It would seem like a sacrilege to him. Alex had no way of knowing or understanding that this was a whole different world, which had nothing to do with their own.

Joe drove Nick back to his trailer then, and they saw women in the now-familiar costumes on the way. Joe recognized several of them as trapeze artists, but to Nick they were just pretty young women in short skirts. He noticed them, but for now he didn't care. And none of them were the kind of woman he would ever have looked at. He had always been attracted to the women in his own world. These girls were young, all foreign, and giggling like schoolgirls. But Joe gaped at them, as he always did, and nearly hit a young boy practicing on tall stilts in the road. There was constant foot traffic on the fairgrounds, everything from midgets to giants. Nick couldn't help staring as an enormously fat woman, who Joe said was very well known, and a man covered with tattoos walked past them, deep in serious conversation. It was a totally exotic crazy world.

And when they got back to Nick's trailer, he saw Lucas laughing and talking to a dwarf, and a man in clown makeup, dressed as a mime and wearing a beret, short pants, ballet shoes, and white tights. Once out of the truck, Nick approached them with interest, as Lucas smiled up at him with wide eyes and introduced his new friends.

"Papa, this is Pierre. He's a clown. And this is Thomas. He's a clown, too, but he doesn't have rehearsal today." Lucas said it as though he'd been there forever and knew their routines perfectly and what they meant. Nick wasn't even sure Lucas knew what a rehearsal was.

Nick shook hands with the young Frenchman, who smiled broadly. He'd been having fun with Lucas, and the dwarf had been laughing when Nick arrived. The threesome were having a good time. It was odd to think that these people would be their friends now, and that Lucas and Toby would grow up among freaks, acrobats, and clowns. Lucas had been begging to see the tattooed lady since they arrived. Joe had made a point of saying there were no "freaks" in the circus, only "acts," "artists," and "performers."

"They said I could be a clown," Lucas said, "and ride in the little car with them during intermission, and Thomas is going to take me to see the elephants." They had seen several in the parking lot that morning, including two babies following their mothers with a handler running alongside.

"That sounds like fun," Nick said with a tired smile. He had a lot to adjust to since they'd arrived that morning, and he didn't have a signed contract yet. It would all depend on his performance at rehearsal the next day, and if John Ringling North liked what he saw. "Toby and I have rehearsal tomorrow morning, for the president of the circus. He's coming to watch us. Where is Toby, by the way?" Nick asked, looking around. His older son was nowhere to be seen.

"He's inside," Lucas said, pointing to the trailer, just as a little girl walked up. She had golden curls that danced all over her head, and big blue eyes. She looked like a doll in a pink dress, and she was about the same age as Lucas. She had wandered over from her trailer nearby. She looked him over with interest, and smiled, as Nick watched.

"Do you speak English?" she asked Lucas boldly, and he nodded, although he wasn't fluent yet. But he had been managing well with the dwarf and the clown. The French clown spoke a few words of German, which helped. "Where are you from?" she asked him with a curious look, as the clown and the dwarf left, promising to visit Lucas the next day. He was already making friends.