One Hundred Merrie And Delightsome Stories - Part 62
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Part 62

As soon as he was lodged there, the good knight drew the cord tightly, and said aloud,

"Ha! scoundrelly priest, is that the sort of man you are?" The priest tried to run away, but he could not go far, for the instrument he had tried to tune to the girl's fiddle was caught in the noose, at which he was much frightened, and did not know what had happened to him. His master pulled the cord more tightly, which would have given him great pain if his fear and alarm had not conquered all other sentiments.

In a few moments he came to himself, and felt the pain and cried piteously for mercy to his master, who had such a strong desire to laugh that he could scarcely speak. He pulled the priest into the room and said;

"Get out, and never come here again! I pardon you in this occasion, but the second time I shall be inexorable."

"Oh, monsieur," he replied, "I will never do it again. It is all her fault," and with that he ran away and the knight went to bed again, and finished what the other had begun.

But you must know that never again was the priest found trespa.s.sing on his master's preserves. Perhaps, as a recompense for his misfortunes the girl afterwards took pity on him, and to ease her conscience lent him her fiddle, and he tuned it so well that the master suffered both in goods and honour. But now I will say no more, and end my story.

STORY THE SEVENTY-SEVENTH -- THE SLEEVELESS ROBE.

By Alardin.

_Of a gentleman of Flanders, who went to reside in France, but whilst he was there his mother was very ill in Flanders; and how he often went to visit her believing that she would die, and what he said and how he behaved, as you will hear later._

A gentleman of Flanders had a mother who was very old and much weakened by disease, and more sick and infirm than any woman of her age. Hoping that she would get better, and be cured, he often came to see her, although he resided in France, and each time that he came he found her suffering so much that he thought her soul was about to leave her body.

On one occasion that he came to see her, she said to him at his departure.

"Adieu, my son; I am sure that you will never see me again for I am about to die."

"Devil take it, mother, you have said that so often that I am sick of it. For three years past you have been repeating that, but you have done nothing of the kind. Choose a day, I beg, and keep to it."

The good woman, when she heard her son's reply, smiled, though she was so sick and old, and said farewell.

One year, then two years, pa.s.sed, and still she lingered on. She was again visited by her son, and one night when he was in bed in her house, and she was so ill that all believed she was about to go to Mortaigne, (*) those who watched her called her son, and told him to come to his mother quickly, for that certainly she was about to die.

(*) Mild puns on the names of places were very common in the Middle Ages.

"Do you say that she is about to die?" he replied. "By my soul, I will not believe it; she always says that, but she never does it."

"No, no," said the nurses; "this time it is certain. Come quickly for it is sure that she is dying."

"Very well, you go first and I will follow you; and tell my mother that if she must go, not to go by Douai, for the road is so bad that I and my horses were nearly swallowed up yesterday."

Nevertheless he rose, and put on his dressing-gown, and went off to see his mother give her last grin. When he came he found her very ill, for she had been in a swoon which all thought would carry her off, but, thank G.o.d, she was now a little better.

"Did I not tell you so?" said this good son. "Every body in this house declares, and she does herself, that she is dying--but nothing comes of it. For G.o.d's sake choose a day--as I have often told you--and see that you keep to it! I am going to return whence I came, and I recommend you not to call me again. If she does die she must die alone, for I will not keep her company."

Now I must tell you the end of this history. The lady, ill as she was, recovered from this extreme sickness, and lived and languished as before for the s.p.a.ce of three years, during which time her good son visited her once, and that was just as she was about to give up the ghost. But when they came to seek him to come to her deathbed, he was trying on a new habit and would not come. Message after message was sent to him, for his good mother, who was nearing her end, wished to recommend her soul to her son's care,--but to all the messages he replied;

"I am sure there is no hurry: she will wait till my habit is finished."

At last so many remonstrances were made to him that he went to his mother, wearing a doublet with no sleeves to it, which, when she saw, she asked him where were the sleeves.

"They are within there,--waiting to be finished as soon as you clear out of the place."

"Then they will be soon finished," she replied; "for I go to G.o.d, to whom I humbly recommend my soul; and to you also, my son."

Without another word she rendered her soul to G.o.d, with the Cross between her arms; on seeing which her good son began to weep so loudly that no one had ever heard the like; he could not be comforted, and at the end of a fortnight he died of grief.

[Ill.u.s.tration: 78.jpg The Husband turned Confessor.]

STORY THE SEVENTY-EIGHTH -- THE HUSBAND TURNED CONFESSOR. [78]

By Jehan Martin.

_Of a married gentleman who made many long voyages, during which time his good and virtuous wife made the acquaintance of three good fellows, as you will hear; and how she confessed her amours to her husband when he returned from his travels, thinking she was confessing to the cure, and how she excused herself, as will appear._

The province of Brabant is a fair and pleasant land, well provided with pretty girls, who are generally clever and good; but as for the men, it is said of them, with a good deal of truth, that the longer they live the greater fools they become.

There was formerly a gentleman of this land who--being thereunto born and destined--travelled much beyond seas to various places, as Cyprus, Rhodes, and the adjacent parts, and at last came to Jerusalem, where he received the order of knighthood.

During the time that he was away, his good wife was not idle, but took her _quoniam_ with three lovers, who like courtiers, each had audience in turn and for a certain time.

First came a gentle squire, fresh and frisky, and in good health, who spent so much upon her, physically and pecuniarily (for in truth she plucked him well) that at last he was sick of it, and left her altogether.

The one who came after him was a knight, and a man of a great reputation, who was very glad to have acquired the succession, and worked her as well as he could, paying his _quibus_ (*), which no one knew better than this l.u.s.ty wench how to get out of a man. In short, if the squire, who had previously held the position, had been plucked, the knight was not less so, until at last he turned tail, took leave of her, and left the place open to the next comer.

(*) Property or wealth; the expression is still used in familiar conversation.

As a t.i.t-bit to finish with, the damsel made the acquaintance of a rich priest, and although he was cunning enough, and not over liberal with money, he was despoiled of rich gowns, vessels, and other valuables.

Now it happened, thank G.o.d, that the husband of the wench let her know that he was coming home; and how he had been made a knight at Jerusalem.

His good wife had the house cleaned and prepared as well as possible.

Everything was ready for his return, except the lady, and she was somewhat disturbed on account of the vast quant.i.ty of booty--tapestry, furniture, vessels, and other valuables--which she had gained upon her back.

When her husband arrived, G.o.d knows what a joyful reception he had, especially from the one who cared least about him, that is to say his worthy wife.

I pa.s.s over all the welcomings, but her husband, although he was a fool, could not help quickly noticing the heap of furniture, which was not there at his departure. He went to the coffers, the buffets, and a number of other places, and everywhere he found his store increased, and the sight of all this booty filled his mind with evil thoughts, and in a hot temper he called for his wife, and demanded to know whence had come all these goods I have already-named.