But she doesn't really know him.

'What's really going on with you and Sylvain, Allie?' Rachel asked at last. 'Do you fancy him? I mean, nobody would blame you. What happened between you the way he saved you from the fire and now,' she swirled her hand, 'all of this. It must have created a connection between you. A kind of bond. And that can be hard to resist. Anyone could confuse that in their head with love.'

'No,' Allie said instantly, although her heart sped up, and she wasn't certain anything she was saying was true. 'No. I don't fancy him.' And then ... 'Oh God. I don't know.' Pulling her bare feet up on to the bed and wrapping her arms around her knees, she said, 'I feel attracted to him, I guess. But that's not why things went bad with me and Carter. I think ...' She stopped to really consider how she actually felt. 'Rach, I miss Carter so much but at the same time I feel like now I can breathe. When he's around I can't breathe.'

'Why? Because he's too overprotective? He suffocates you?'

Allie nodded miserably. 'I love him, I really do. But he tells me what to do. He argues with me all the time. I think he doesn't believe in me and it makes me doubt myself. And I know why he does it I've been thinking about it a lot and I know. He doesn't have anybody. No parents, or brothers or sisters, no aunts or grandparents. He's alone and I'm all he's got and so he hangs on to me. He wants to protect me. But when he does that I can't breathe.'

'It was that bad?'

'I don't know. Yes ... No ...' Allie held up her hands helplessly. 'I'm making it sound worse than it is. There was so much good stuff too. But as much as I miss Carter and I do I feel free without him.'

Rachel let her breath out slowly. 'Then you have to stay broken up, Allie. If you feel like that, no matter how hard it is to move on, I think you have to do it.'

'But I don't know how.' Tears returned as suddenly as they'd left. 'All I do is think about him. All day I'm like, Carter and I stood here and Carter and I laughed here. It's so stupid.' She dashed the tears away with an angry gesture. 'But I can't stop. It's like my mind is obsessed with him.'

'This is why breaking up sucks, Allie.' Rachel's tone was gentle. 'This is why people don't like to do it. It takes time. And I think you need to distract yourself. All you ever do any more is work. So do some things you didn't ever do with Carter. Hang out with Jo, even if she's as mad as a box of chickens. Or me. Or Zoe. Avoid Carter ... and Sylvain,' she added hastily. 'The last thing you need is a sloppy rebound. You need to find out who you are now so you'll know what you want. Maybe you do want Sylvain, I don't know. But maybe that's just your heart looking for a replacement model. And I don't think replacement models ever work out as well as the real thing. So, take some time to row your boat down the River Allie.'

Almost laughing through her tears, Allie said, 'I can't believe you just freakin' said that.'

'Me neither.' Rachel grinned. 'This therapy session is over. I'll invoice you later.'

Allie tried to take Rachel's advice. Forcing herself to hang out in the common room playing chess with Jo. Or, rather, losing to Jo at chess. Going to a kick-boxing class with Zoe, who passionately loved kicking things. Sitting with Rachel and Lucas at dinner talking about classes she didn't really care about.

She practised not searching for Carter in every room. Getting through classes they had together without once looking his way. Not looking up until he'd walked out the door.

It helped that Carter had taken to sitting across the dining hall with Jules and her friends. But everybody still walked on eggshells around the two of them, trying not pick sides, though loyalties were inevitably divided.

'I'd really hate for things to become Team Carter and Team Allie,' she told Jo one night as she lost a speedy game of chess in the crowded common room after dinner. 'But that's happening anyway.'

They were sitting on the floor around a low chess table, hidden away on one side of the room. At the piano, a boy was playing a jazz version of a rock song. Some students were dancing in front of the bookcases. The room was cacophonous. And Allie found herself almost enjoying the anarchic feel.

'It always happens,' Jo said loftily. 'Check. You really need to learn to use your rook. It's just sitting there. But this isn't the worst case I've seen. When Lucas and I broke up ... Oh my God. What a mess. Because we were really mad at each other, so it was like ... Palestine around here.' The drama in her voice made Allie smile. Jo had been holding steady for a week now; it was nice to see her acting like herself again. 'Everybody picked a side and people didn't talk to each other. Grimness. But you guys ...' As instructed, Allie moved her rook and Jo rolled her eyes. 'Checkmate Jesus, Allie, you're pathetic at this. You two don't seem so mad. Mostly you just ignore each other, which makes it easier. For your friends, I mean. Sucks for you, I know.'

'Have you,' Allie helped reset the board, 'talked to Carter?'

'Of course! I talk to him every day. That's the crappy thing about break-ups the only people not talking are you guys.'

This had never occurred to Allie. She sat still, holding her king in one hand. 'How is he?'

Jo's eyes were sympathetic. 'Sad. Lonely. But totally fine. He's like you he's getting on with things. Lucas is helping him. He wants to kill Sylvain but Jerry Cole is keeping them apart.' As she finished arranging the pieces, though, she brightened. 'Hey, are you going to the party next week? Up at the castle ruins?'

Never had Allie wanted to do anything less, but she tried to sound like she cared. 'What party? I haven't heard anything about it.'

'It's a thing they do it every year. It's next Friday. I'm definitely going. It's fun and spooky up there. We'll have a bonfire. Roast marshmallows. Drink wine, tell ghost stories ...'

'Is it ...' Allie bit her tongue. She'd almost said, Is it safe? Meaning, safe from Nathaniel, safe from Christopher. Approved by Raj Patel. But she couldn't talk about that with Jo. 'Is it legal?' she asked instead. 'You know, is Isabelle cool with it?'

'It's for all advanced students.' Jo's tone was evasive. 'Of which you are one. Everyone will be there. You should definitely come.'

'I'll think about it,' Allie said, not wanting to think about it.

Every few days she met with Isabelle. Each time, Allie asked about Nathaniel and, each time, Isabelle told her there was nothing new about him or the spy among them. In return, Allie could tell her that there'd been no word from Christopher, either, even though, every single time she walked into her bedroom, her eyes were drawn first to her empty desktop, searching for the envelope in thick ivory paper with her name written in left-slanted handwriting. But it never appeared.

Throughout it all she stuck zealously to the rules. In her room by eleven every night. Never late for any meal or class. And as Night School resumed, she focused on training and strategy her back straight and her eyes on Raj Patel. Blocking out Carter and Sylvain and anything that could not be used to save her life in the woods, in the dark. She poured her sadness, confusion and anger into learning to fight with her hands and feet. It was satisfying.

This was just what Isabelle wanted and, little by little, Allie thought the headmistress was beginning to forgive her.

As she made her way down the grand staircase to meet Isabelle one afternoon, she saw Katie Gilmore's distinctive red ponytail bouncing in her direction. As always, Allie moved to avoid her but, to her surprise, Katie made a sharp turn to intercept her.

'Hey, Allie.' Her bright smile showed off her even, white teeth.

Jesus, Allie thought, even her lipstick is perfect. How does she do it?

'What's up, Katie?' She tried to keep the suspicion out of her voice.

'A few of us are going to go out on Friday, up to the tower for a bonfire,' Katie said. 'It's a tradition for senior students. You should come.'

'Let me get this straight.' Allie stared at her in disbelief. 'You're inviting me to a party?' She paused for drama. 'Katie, are you off your meds?'

'Oh, Allie, don't be silly.' Katie's smile was disturbingly angelic. 'It's a big party. I know you and Carter are having problems so I just wanted to make sure you weren't just sitting around moping. Will you come?'

At mention of Carter, Allie bristled. Something about the way Katie said his name set her nerves on edge. She said it with intent, as if she had plans for him.

Remember you're on probation, Allie told herself, and from somewhere she produced a bland shrug.

'Maybe. I've got some studying to do.'

'Brilliant.' Katie looked pleased. 'We've even got special dispensation to stay out past curfew. I hope you'll come. It'll be fun.'

As Allie watched her go, suspicion uncurled in her belly.

What are you up to, you evil red-headed cow?

TWENTY-THREE.

When she walked in to Isabelle's office that afternoon and asked the usual question with her eyebrows and, looking at her over the top of her glasses, Isabelle gave the usual answer with a shake of her head, Allie plopped into the chair in front of her desk with a sigh.

'Katie Gilmore wants me to go to that party at the castle on Friday night. I guess that means I shouldn't go.'

Isabelle took off her glasses and set them down on the stack of papers in front of her. 'I don't think,' she said, 'that you should set your social calendar so that you only do what Katie Gilmore doesn't want you to do.'

'She says it's legal,' Allie said. 'Is it? For girls on probation, I mean?'

Isabelle waved her hand. 'It is "legal", as you put it, in that nobody is punished for going. It's a tradition. The students are trusted to go up and not burn the entire forest down. Teachers don't go up and hover. Students are given an extra hour after curfew. If everyone minds their manners, it happens again next year. It's been going on ever since the castle fell down; we certainly did it when I was a student here.'

Allie tried to imagine a sixteen-year-old Isabelle hanging out with her own sixteen-year-old mother and failed. 'But is it,' she shrugged, 'you know ... safe?' It still felt weird talking about security and she mumbled the words. 'Like, will Raj Patel be there?'

A melancholy smile flashed across the headmistress' face. 'It is both a sign of your progress and our lack of progress that you ask that question. But the answer is yes. Raj's guards will be all around it. He's calling in extra people for the night. It will be very safe.'

'Doesn't matter,' Allie muttered, contrarily. 'I probably won't go. It'll all be happy clappy campfire bollocks.' Isabelle shot her a look. 'Pardon my language.'

'I'm going to say something that might shock you, Allie.' Fixing her with a firm look, Isabelle leaned forward. 'I want you to go to that party.'

'Oh God.' Allie slid down low in her chair. 'Not you, too?'

Isabelle continued as if she hadn't spoken. 'The last few weeks have been so stressful for all of us, but especially for you. And with what's happened between you and Carter ...' She walked around to the front of her desk until she was right in front of Allie. 'I think you've handled everything incredibly well. Your work has been exemplary. But I'm worried about what's going on in here.' Gently, she tapped her forefinger against Allie's heart. 'And I'd like to see you have fun. Promise me you'll go.'

Squirming, Allie looked to one side. 'Isabelle ...' She really didn't want to go now.

But Isabelle wasn't going to be put off. 'Promise me, as a condition of your probation, that you will go to this party and try to have fun.'

'OK,' Allie said with deep reluctance. 'I'll go. But I'm not promising to enjoy it.'

'Good.' Isabelle walked back around her desk. 'But stay away from Katie Gilmore. You're not good for each other. And you're not allowed to fight.'

Allie glared at her. 'Awesome.'

When Allie walked into the common room a few minutes later, she found Zoe was curled up on the sofa reading Mrs Dalloway with a baffled expression.

'I don't get it,' she said, tossing the paperback on to the table beside her. 'Everybody in this book lies all the time. It's stupid. Nobody ever says what they mean. And why was everyone so depressed in history?'

'War?' Allie suggested, sitting on the other end of the long, leather couch.

'We have war,' Zoe pointed out. 'But we're not miserable.' 'True.' Allie thought about it. 'I don't know. Maybe it was ... diet.'

That seemed to mollify Zoe. 'Vitamins.' She nodded knowingly.

'What are you two talking about?' Rachel carried a stack of books so tall it reached her nose. It wobbled as she set it down gingerly on a table nearby.

'Vitamins,' Zoe explained.

'Of course.'

Rachel shuffled the books in a complex system, like a thick deck of cards. Allie and Zoe exchanged puzzled looks. 'Tea?' Allie suggested hopefully. 'Possibly with food?'

Rachel looked up, a dusty, leather-bound book dangling from one hand. 'Absolutely.'

It was still several hours until dinner, and the kitchens were empty. Loaves of bread dough had been left to rise on one counter, covered in white cloths like tiny corpses. The room smelled sweetly of warm yeast.

There were two large refrigerators one the students were allowed to open for milk and snacks. The other they weren't meant to touch.

'Let's see ...' Opening the students' fridge, Rachel peered inside. 'Ooh, leftover sandwiches. Score!' She pulled out a tray covered in plastic wrap with sandwich quarters neatly arranged. They were pouring tea when Jo walked in.

'Great minds ...' she said, grabbing a mug.

'So, about this stupid party ...' Allie sighed.

'Don't look at me.' Looking almost panicked, Rachel stepped back. 'I'm definitely not going. Behind on everything.'

Jo raised her hand. 'I'm definitely going,'

'I want to go.' Zoe spoke through a mouth full of cheese, and Allie looked at her dubiously.

'Are you allowed? It's senior students only.'

Zoe glared at her. 'I may be small, but I'm as senior as you are.'

'It's true,' Jo interceded. 'Zoe can definitely come.' She turned to Allie. 'Look, why don't we all go together?'

'I don't want to go at all.' Allie sank back against the counter glumly. 'Isabelle's making me.'

'It won't be so bad,' Jo said. 'We can be each other's dates.' 'No kissing,' Allie said.

'Holding hands?' Jo's voice was hopeful.

'Deal.'

'Am I wearing enough layers?'

Standing in the hallway by the back door, Jo was swathed in a pale pink pashmina, heavy white boots, a quilted jacket and thermal leggings, It was nearly nine o'clock and they were heading out to the party but she seemed more prepared for a Swiss ski slope than a hill in England.

'I think you might survive,' Allie said dryly, buttoning her pea coat. She wore her uniform skirt with two layers of tights and her red Doc Marten boots, which reached all the way to her knees.

Eyeing Allie's boots, Jo said, 'Are those insulated? Your feet will get cold.'

'I don't care.' Allie knotted her scarf. 'I'm donating my toes to science.'

'Hey, wait up!'

Allie glanced back to see Zoe hurrying down the hall, pulling on her coat. A bright blue bobble hat perched on her head.

'Come on,' Allie said. 'We're holding hands on the way up and later we're going to make out.'

'You said no kissing,' Jo reminded her as she opened the door.

'I meant no tongues.'

Outside the night was dark and clear; a nearly full moon illuminated the path ahead of them so thoroughly that until they passed into the woods at the base of the hill they didn't need a torch.