New Comedies - Part 22
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Part 22

_Delia:_ He to be stopping here, and being light in the brain, it is likely some thief travelling the road might break his way in and sweep all.

_Ralph:_ It would be right for us keep some sort of a watch on it.

_Staffy:_ What way would we be sitting here watching it, the same as a hen on a pebble of flint, through a quarter or it might be three quarters of a year? He might drag for a good while yet, and live and linger into old days.

_Delia:_ To take some cross turn he might, and to come at us violent and maybe tear the flesh from our bones.

_Staffy:_ It is best for us do nothing so, but to leave it to the foreknowledge of G.o.d.

_Delia:_ There is but the one thing to do. To bring it away out of this and to lodge it within in my own house. We can settle out a place under the hearth.

_Staffy:_ We can make a right division of it at such time as the end will come.

_Ralph:_ What way now will we bring away the crock?

_Delia:_ Let you go outside and be watching the road while Staffy will be bringing out the gold.

_Staffy:_ Ah, I'm not so limber as what Ralph is. There does be giddiness and delay in my feet. It might fail me to heave it to a hiding place and to bring it away unknownst.

_Delia:_ Let you go out so and be keeping a watch, and Ralph will put it on the a.s.s-car under sacks.

_Ralph:_ Do it you. I am not of his own kindred and his family.

Any person to get a sketch of me bringing it away they might nearly take myself to be a thief.

_Delia:_ We are doing but what is fair and is right.

_Ralph:_ Maybe so. But any neighbour to be questioning me, it might be hard put a skin on the story.

_Delia:_ There is no person to do it but the one. _(Calls from the door.)_ Come in here from the shed, Simon Niland, if the sluggishness is banished from your eyesight and from your limbs.

_Simon: (At door_) I was thinking to go travel my road.

_Delia:_ Have you any desire to reach out your hand for to save a mortal life?

_Simon: (Coming in.)_ Whose life is that?

_Staffy:_ The man of this house that is your uncle and is owner of wealth closed up in a jar. We now being wittier than himself, that has lost his wits, have our mind made up to bring it away.

_Simon:_ Outside of his knowledge is it?

_Staffy:_ It will be safe and well minded and lodged in loyal keeping, it being no profit to him that is at this time shook and blighted, but only a danger to his days.

_Delia:_ The seven senses to be going astray on him, what would ail any tramp or neuk that would be pa.s.sing the road, not to rob him and to lay him stone dead?

_Staffy:_ Go in now and bring out from the room and to such place as we will command, that gallon jar of gold.

_Ralph:_ It being certain it will be brought away from him, it is best it to be kept in the family, and not to go nourishing lawyers or thieves.

_Simon:_ Is it to steal it I should?

_Staffy:_ What way will it be stealing, and the whole of us to be looking on at your deed?

_Simon:_ Ah, what call have I to do that much and maybe put myself in danger of the judge, for the sake of a man is without sense.

_Delia:_ Let you do it for my own sake so. You heard me giving out news on yesterday of the white goats are on the bounds of being sold.

The neighbours will give me no more credit, where they loaned me the price of a crested side car was auctioned out at a quality sale.

_Ralph:_ Picking the eyes out of my own head they are, to pay the little bills they have against her.

_Delia:_ I am no way greedy, I would ask neither food or bite, I would not begrudge turning Sunday into Friday if I could but get my heart's desire. Such a thing now as a guinea-hen would be bringing fashion to the door, throwing it a handful of yellow meal, and it in its speckled plumage giving out its foreign call!

_Simon:_ I have no mind to be brought within the power of the law.

_Delia:_ You that are near in blood to refuse me so small an asking, what chance would I have sending requests to Heaven that is beyond the height of the clouds!

_(Weeps.)_

_Staffy:_ That's the way with them that are reared poor, they are the hardest after to humour, striving to bring everything to their own way. But there's a cla.s.s of people in the world wouldn't do a hand's turn, no more than the bird upon the tree.

_Ralph:_ I wonder you not to give in to us, when all the world knows G.o.d formed young people for to be giving aid to elder people, and beyond all to them that are near to them in blood.

_Staffy:_ Look now, Simon, let you be said and led by me. You having no great share of wisdom we are wishful to make a snug man of you and to put you on a right road. Go in now and you will not be kept out of your own profit and your share, and a harbour of plenty beyond all.

_Simon:_ It might be guarded by a serpent in a tree, or by unnatural things would be in the similitude of cats.

_Staffy:_ Ah, that cla.s.s is done away with this good while.

_Ralph:_ There is no person having sense, but would take means, by hook or by crook, to make his pocket stiff and he to be given his fair chance. It is to save you from starvation we are wishful to do, as much as to bring profit to ourselves.

_Staffy:_ You not to follow our say you will be brought to burn green ferns to boil your victuals, or to devour the berries of the bush.

_Simon:_ I would not wish a head to follow me and leap up on the table and wrestle me, or to drink against me with its gory mouth.

_Staffy:_ You that have not the substance of a crane's marrow, to go shrink from so small a bidding, let you go on the shaughraun or to the workhouse, where you would not take our advice.

_Simon:_ I'll go do your bidding so. I will go bring out the crock.

_Staffy:_ There is my whiteheaded boy! I'll keep a watch, the way Damer will not steal in on us without warning.

_Ralph:_ He should have the key in some secret place. It is best for you give the lock a blow of your foot.

_Simon:_ I'll do that.

_(He gives door a kick. It opens easily.)_

_Delia:_ Was I right now saying Damer is turned innocent? Sure the door was not locked at all.

_Simon: (Dragging out jar.)_ Here it is now.

_Ralph:_ So it is and no mistake.