Nature and Human Nature - Part 19
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Part 19

Well, he up, and as quick as wink fired, and hit it directly in the centre.

"Well," sais I, "you scare me. To tell you the truth, I didn't expect to be taken up that way. And so sure as I boast of a thing, I slip out of the little eend of the horn." Well, I drew a bead fine on it, and fired.

"That mark is too small," said he (thinking I had missed it), "and hardly plain enough."

"I shouldn't wonder if I had gone a one side or the other," said I, as we walked up to it, "I intended to send your ball further in; but I guess I have only turned it round. See, I have cut a little grain of the bark off the right side of the circle."

"Good," said he, "these b.a.l.l.s are near enough to give a critter the heart-ache, at any rate. You are a better shot than I am; and that's what I have never seen in this province. Strange, too, for you don't live in the woods as I do."

"That's the reason," said I, "I shoot for practice, you, when you require it. Use keeps your hand in, but it wouldn't do it for me; so I make up by practising whenever I can. When I go to the woods, which ain't as often now as I could wish, for they ain't to be found everywhere in our great country, I enjoy it with all my heart. I enter into it as keen as a hound, and I don't care to have the Clockmaker run rigs on. A man's life often depends on his shot, and he ought to be afraid of nothin'. Some men, too, are as dangerous as wild beasts; but if they know you can snuff a candle with a ball, hand runnin', why, they are apt to try their luck with some one else, that ain't up to snuff, that's all. It's a common feeling, that.

"The best shot I ever knew, was a tailor at Albany. He used to be very fond of brousin' in the forest sometimes, and the young fellows was apt to have a shy at Thimble. They talked of the skirts of the forest, the capes of the Hudson, laughing in their sleeve, giving a fellow a bastin, having a st.i.tch in the side, cuffing a fellow's ears, taking a tuck-in at lunch, or calling mint-julip an inside lining, and so on; and every time any o' these words came out, they all laughed like anything.

"Well, the critter, who was really a capital fellow, used to join in the laugh himself, but still grinnin' is no proof a man enjoys it; for a hyena will laugh, if you give him a poke. So what does he do, but practise in secret every morning and evening at pistol-shooting for an hour or two, until he was a shade more than perfection itself. Well, one day he was out with a party of them same c.o.o.ns, and they began to run the old rig on him as usual. And he jumps up on eend, and in a joking kind o' way, said: 'Gentlemen, can any of you st.i.tch a b.u.t.ton-hole, with the b.u.t.ton in it?' Well, they all roared out at that like mad.

"'No, Sirree,' sais they, 'but come, show us Thimble, will you? that's a good fellow. Tom, fetch the goose to press it when it's done. d.i.c.k, cabbage a bit of cloth for him to try it upon. Why, Tom, you are as sharp as a needle.'

"'Well,' sais he, 'I'll show you.'

"So he went to a tree, and took out of his pocket a fip-penny bit, that had a hole in the centre, and putting in it a small nail, which he had provided, he fastened it to the tree.

"'Now,' said he, taking out a pair of pistols, and lots of ammunition, from the bottom of his prog-basket, where he had hid them. 'Now,' said he, 'gentlemen, the way to st.i.tch a b.u.t.tonhole, is to put b.a.l.l.s all round that b.u.t.ton, in a close ring, and never disturb them; that's what we tailors call workmanlike:' and he fired away, shot after shot, till he had done it.

"'Now,' said he,' gentlemen, that b.u.t.ton has to be fastened;' and he fired, and drove the nail that it hung on into the tree. 'And now, gentlemen,' said he, 'I have stood your shots for many a long day, turn about is fair play. The first man that cracks a joke at me, on account of my calling, must stand my shot, and 'if I don't st.i.tch his b.u.t.ton-hole for him, I am no tailor; that's all.'

"Well, they all cheered him when he sat down, and they drank his health; and the boss of the day said: 'Well, Street (afore that he used to call him Thimble), well, Street,' said he, 'you are a man.'

"'There you are again,' said Street, 'that is a covered joke at a tailor being only the ninth part of one. I pa.s.s it over this time, but let's have no more of it.'

"'No, Sirree, no,' said boss, 'on honour now, I didn't mean it. And I say, too, let there be no more of it.'"

"Not a bad story!" said the doctor. "A man ought to be able to take his own part in the world; but my idea is we think too much of guns.

Do you know anything of archery?"

"A little," sais I, "at least folks say so; but then they really give me credit for what I don't deserve; they say I draw a thunderin' long bow sometimes."

"Oh! oh!" he said laughing, "positively, as the fellow said to the tailor, you'll give me a st.i.tch in my side. Well, that's better than being 'sewed up,' as Jehu was last night. But, seriously, do you ever use the bow?"

"Well, I have tried the South American bow, and it's a powerful weapon that; but it takes a man to draw it, I tell you."

"Yes," said he, "it requires a strong arm; but the exercise is good for the chest. It's the one I generally use. The bow is a great weapon, and the oldest in the world. I believe I have a tolerable collection of them. The Indian bow was more or less excellent, according to the wood they had; but they never could have been worth much here, for the country produces no suitable material. The old English long-bow perhaps is a good one; but it is not so powerful as the Turkish. That has immense power. They say it will carry an arrow from four hundred and fifty to five hundred yards. Mine perhaps is not a first-rate one, nor am I what I call a skilful archer; but I can reach beyond three hundred yards--though that is an immense distance.

The gun has superseded them; but though superior in many respects, the other has some qualities that are invaluable. In skirmishing, or in surprising outposts, what an advantage it is to avoid the alarm and noise occasioned by firearms. All troops engaged in this service in addition to the rifle ought to have the bow and the quiver. What an advantage it would have been in the Caffre war, and how serviceable now in the Crimea. They are light to carry and quickly discharged.

When we get to my house I will prove it to you. We will set up two targets, at one hundred yards, say. You shall fire from one to the other, and then stand aside, and before you can reload I will put three arrows into yours. I should say four to a common soldier's practice; but I give even you three to one. If a man misses his first shot at me with a gun, he is victimized, for I have three chances in return before he gets his second, and if I don't pink him with one or the other--why, I deserve to be hit. For the same reason, what a glorious cavalry weapon it is, as the Parthians knew. What a splendid thing for an ambush, where you are neither seen nor heard. I don't mean to say they are better than fire-arms; but, occasionally used with them they would be irresistible. If I were a British officer in command I would astonish the enemy."

"You would astonish the Horse-Guards, too, I know," said I. "It would ruin you for ever. They'd call you old 'bows and arrows,' as they did the general that had no flints to his guns, when he attacked Buonus Ayres; they'd have you up in 'Punch;' they'd draw you as Cupid going to war; they'd nickname you a Bow-street officer. Oh! they'd soon teach you what a quiver was. They'd play the devil with you. They'd beat you at your own game; you'd be stuck full of poisoned arrows. You could as easily introduce the queue again, as the bow."

"Well, Cressy, Poictiers, and Agincourt were won with the bow," he said, "and, as an auxiliary weapon, it is still as effective as ever.

However that is not a mere speculation. When I go out after cariboo, I always carry mine, and seldom use my gun. It don't alarm the herd; they don't know where the shaft comes from, and are as likely to look for it in the lake or in the wild gra.s.s as anywhere else. Let us try them together. But let us load with shot now. We shall come to the brook directly, and where it spreads out into still water, and the flags grow, the wild fowl frequent; for they are amazin' fond of poke-lokeins, as the Indians call those spots. We may get a brace or two perhaps to take home with us. Come, let us push ahead, and go warily."

After awhile a sudden turn of the road disclosed to us a flock of blue-winged ducks, and he whispered, "Do you fire to the right, and I will take the left." When the smoke from our simultaneous discharges cleared away, we saw the flock rise, leaving five of their number as victims of their careless watch.

"That is just what I said," he remarked, "the gun is superior in many respects; but if we had our bows here, we would have had each two more shots at them, while on the wing. As it is, we can't reload till they are out of reach. I only spoke of the how as subordinate and auxiliary; but never as a subst.i.tute. Although I am not certain that, with our present manufacturing skill, metallic bows could not now be made, equal in power, superior in lightness, and more effective than any gun when the object to be aimed at is not too minute, for in that particular the rifle will never be equalled--certainly not surpa.s.sed."

The retriever soon brought us our birds, and we proceeded leisurely on our way, and in a short time were overtaken by the waggons, when we advanced together towards the house, which we reached in about an hour more. As soon as we came in sight of it, the dogs gave notice of our approach, and a tall, straight, priggish-looking man marched, for he did not hurry himself, bareheaded towards the bars in the pole fence.

He was soon afterwards followed by a little old woman at a foot amble, or sort of broken trot, such as distinguishes a Naraganset pacer. She had a hat in her hand, which she hastily put on the man's head. But, as she had to jump up to do it, she effected it with a force that made it cover his eyes, and nearly extinguish his nose. It caused the man to stop and adjust it, when he turned round to his flapper, and, by the motion of his hand, and her retrogade movement, it appeared he did not receive this delicate attention very graciously. Duty however was pressing him, and he resumed his stately step towards the bars.

She attacked him again in the rear, as a goose does an intruder, and now and then picked something from his coat, which I supposed to be a vagrant thread, or a piece of lint or straw, and then retreated a step or two to avoid closer contact. He was compelled at last to turn again on his pursuer, and expostulate with her in no gentle terms. I heard the words "mind your own business," or something of the kind, and the female voice more distinctly (women always have the best of it), "You look as if you had slept in it. You ain't fit to appear before gentlemen." Ladies she had been unaccustomed of late to see, and therefore omitted altogether. "What would Colonel Jones say if he saw you that way?"

To which the impatient man replied: "Colonel Jones be hanged. He is not my commanding officer, or you either--take that will you, old ooman." If the colonel was not there his master was, therefore pressing forward he took down the bars, and removed them a one side, when he drew himself bolt upright, near one of the posts, and placing his hand across his forehead, remained in that position, without uttering a word, till the waggons pa.s.sed, and the doctor said, "Well, Jackson, how are you?" "Hearty, Sir! I hope your Honour is well? Why, Buscar, is that you, dog; how are you, my man?" and then he proceeded very expeditiously to replace the poles.

"What are you stopping for?" said the doctor to me, for the whole party was waiting for us.

"I was admirin' of them bars," said I.

"Why, they are the commonest things in the country," he replied. "Did you never see them before?" Of course I had, a thousand times, but I didn't choose to answer.

"What a most beautiful contrivance," said I, "they are. First, you can't find them, if you don't know beforehand where they are, they look so like the rest of the fence. It tante one stranger in a thousand could take them down, for if he begins at the top they get awfully tangled, and if he pulls the wrong way, the harder he hauls the tighter they get. Then he has to drag them all out of the way, so as to lead the horse through, and leave him standin' there till he puts them up agin, and as like as not, the critter gets tired of waitin', races off to the stable, and breaks the waggon all to flinders. After all these advantages, they don't cost but a shilling or so more than a gate. Oh, it's grand."

"Well, well," said the doctor, "I never thought of that afore, but you are right after all," and he laughed as good humouredly as possible.

"Jackson," said he.

"Yes, your Honour."

"We must have a gate there."

"Certainly," said the servant, touching his hat. But he honoured me with a look, as much as to say, "Thank you for nothing, Sir. It's a pity you hadn't served under Colonel Jones, for he would have taught you to mind your own business double quick."

We then proceeded to the door, and the doctor welcomed the party to the "Bachelor Beaver's-dam," as he called it. In the mean time, the bustling little old woman returned, and expressed great delight at seeing us. The place was so lonesome, she said, and it was so pleasant to see ladies there, for they were the first who had ever visited the doctor, and it was so kind of them to come so far, and she hoped they would often honour the place with their presence, if they could put up with their accommodation, for she had only heard from the doctor the night before; and she was so sorry she couldn't receive them as she could wish, and a whole volume more, and an appendix longer than that, and an index to it, where the paging was so jumbled you couldn't find nothin'.

Jackson joined in, and said he regretted his commissariat was so badly supplied. That it was a poor country to forage in, and that there was nothing but the common rations and stores for the detachment stationed there. But that nothing should be wanting on his part, and so on. The housekeeper led the way to the apartments destined for the girls.

Peter a.s.sisted the boy to unharness the horses, and the doctor showed Cutler and myself into the hall, where the breakfast table was set for us. Seeing Jackson marching to the well, as if he was on parade, I left the two together in conversation, and went out to talk to him.

"Sergeant," sais I.

"Yes, your Honour," said he, and he put down the pail, and raised his hand to his forehead.

"I understand you have seen a great deal of service in your time."

"Yes, Sir," said he, looking well pleased, and as if his talking tacks were all ready. I had hit the right subject. "I ave gone through a deal of soldiering in my day, and been in many a ard fight, Sir."

"I see you have the marks on you," I said. "That is a bad scar on your face."

"Well, Sir," said he, "saving your presence, I wish the devil had the Frenchman that gave me that wound. I have some I am proud of having received in the service of my king and country. I have three b.a.l.l.s in me now, which the doctors couldn't extract, and nothin' but death will bring to the light of day again, if they can be said to be seen in the grave. But that scar is the only disgraceful mark I ever received since I first joined in 1808.

"When we were laying siege to Badajoz, Sir, I was in the cavalry, and I was sent with a message to a brigade that was posted some distance from us. Well, Sir, as I was trotting along, I saw a French dragoon, well mounted, leading a splendid spare orse, belonging to some French hofficer of rank, as far as I could judge from his happearance and mountings. Instead of pursuing my course, as I ought to have done, Sir, I thought I'de make a dash at the rascal, and make prize of that are hanimal. So I drew my sword, raised myself in my saddle (for I was considered a first-rate swordsman, as most Hinglishmen hare who have been used to the single-stick), and made sure I ad him. Instead of turning, he kept steadily on, and never as much as drew his sabre, so in place of making a cut hat him, for I'de scorn to strike han hunarmed man, my play was to cut is reins, and then if he wanted a scrimmage, to give him one, and if not, to carry off that hare orse.

"Well, Sir, he came on gallantly, I must say that, and kept his eye fixed steadily on me, when just as I was going to make a cut at his reins, he suddenly seized his eavy-mounted elmet, and threw it slap at my face, and I'll be anged if it didn't stun me, and knock me right off the orse flat on the ground, and then he galloped off as ard as he could go. When I got up, I took his elmet under my harm, and proceeded on my route. I was ashamed to tell the story straight, and I made the best tale I could of the scrimmage, and showed the elmet in token that it was a pretty rough fight. But the doctor, when he dressed the wound, swore it never was made with a sword, nor a bullet, nor any instrument he knew hon, and that he didn't think it was occasioned by a fall, for it was neither insised, outsised, nor contused--but a confusion of all three. He questioned me as close as a witness.

"'But,' sais I, 'doctor, there is no telling what himplements Frenchmen ave. They don't fight like us, they don't. It was a runnin'

scrimmage, or handicap fight.' Yes, Sir, if it was hanywhere helse, where it wouldn't show, it wouldn't be so bad, but there it is on the face, and there is no denyin' of it."