"Oh, yes, you do. It's very cute."

"I doubt I'll be able to sleep while I'm with you now," she said. But a big yawn followed that statement, making them both laugh.

"I was very proud of you today," he said. "You knew what you wanted, what you needed, and although it wasn't easy for you, you got the job done. Very proud."

She turned her head to look back at him. "I don't know if you'll understand this, but since meeting you I feel like my best self is coming out. Maybe it's because of your confidence in me. It kind of trumps my own lack of confidence."

They talked for a little while, snuggled together in the chair in front of the fire. Angie hadn't realized she'd fallen asleep until she felt herself being lifted into his arms and carried to bed.

"Let me help you get comfortable," he said, pulling off her clothes. "Want a T-shirt?"

"Yes, please," she said, holding her arms out for him.

He stripped down to his boxers and crept under the covers where he curved himself around her back.

"Did you know I've never slept with a man before?"

"Sure you have. You had that ex-boyfriend."

"Mmm-hmm. But I didn't sleep with him. He couldn't get out of bed fast enough." She burrowed into his arms. "He didn't know what he was missing. Snoring or not, I've never rested better in my life."

It was quiet for a long moment before Patrick kissed the back of her neck and said, "Me, too."

After Angie had left in the morning, Patrick dialed Marie's cell phone.

"What great timing," she said. "I'm sitting in the parking lot outside the day care at my mom's church. It's my old church, but from a long time ago. My mom convinced me to let Daniel go to day care a couple of mornings a week. She didn't want me to get too clingy right now and then get a job and suddenly shift him into full-time or almost full-time. She's right. He doesn't realize he lost a father. And he needs other children."

"Probably wise. How are you doing?"

"Up and down," she said. "You know-I have periods of thinking I'm doing better, then I have a couple of days I don't want to get out of bed. This is when having a two-year-old probably saves my life-my mom would let me lie in the bed, I think. But Daniel won't. How are you doing?"

"Okay," he said, feeling so guilty that his life had never felt better. "I got involved in a special project. There's a young woman here, a visiting relative of someone in town, actually. She's on break from med school and she helps out at the clinic and she became aware of a problem that needed fixing. A little girl with a bad facial scar and no money to repair it. So this woman took it upon herself to find funding through donations and I offered to help. It's kind of taking the focus off me and my self-pity."

"Really, Paddy? That sounds wonderful. Where did you meet her?"

"In the bar-the town bar. She's the niece of the owner. She's pretty young, but she makes up for it with a lot of courage."

"Aw, you sound so tender when you talk about her...."

He wanted to tell her more-about Angie's accident, her struggle to recover, the issues with her family and her efforts to make her own way in the world. To pay back or pay forward. And he wished there was someone he could tell that his life had never felt this kind of peace, not even before his losses. But he said, "It's easy to admire her efforts. I would have seen that little girl's scar and just felt bad about it. Not Angie. She saw it and said, *What can we do?' and got after it. She's trying to get financing for corrective surgery. I found out that rather than going back to medical school right away, she's going to give a couple of years to the peace corps."

"Do you think she'll get the funding?" Marie asked.

"She's making the rounds right now, going from business to business, from organization to club. She even put up a Facebook page that gives instructions for donating. Her aunt helped her set up an account for donations at a local bank. And what people don't realize about her is that it's actually pretty hard for her to put herself out there like that. She's studious, an introvert."

"What's the Facebook page called?"

"I don't know. I haven't even looked. I think it's probably Megan's Reconstructive Surgery or something. Now tell me what you're doing, besides sitting in your car outside day care?"

"People try to keep me busy," she said. "It verges on annoying, to tell the truth. From family and extended family to old friends from high school, I get invitations and visits and offers of things to do. I still need some time alone, though. I need time to grieve. According to my grief group, there's no bypa.s.sing it by staying active, even though some activity helps."

"You did go back to grief group," he said. "Did you confess about the Christmas presents for Jake?"

She gave a little laugh. "You'll never believe it-I confessed and three people in my group had done the same thing. Some people admit that years after losing a loved one like a sister or parent they still reach for the phone to call them, to tell them something, before they're reminded that, oh, yeah, they're gone. Right now I'm the baby, the newbie, but they talk about being changed and seeing their growth when someone with fresh pain comes to the group. There's only one thing wrong with this-I desperately want to graduate."

"I can imagine," he said. "And you will. We both will. There's a new, hopeful life out there for both of us."

Eleven

The rest of Angie's week verged on idyllic. After making sure her aunt Mel didn't need her help in the clinic, she drove into the coastal towns every morning. She went from business to business, large and small, showing a couple of pictures, explaining about Megan's situation. She was in restaurants, print shops and even tattoo parlors. Sometimes she collected cash-a few dollars here and there. Sometimes she gave account deposit information for Farmers Trust Bank. She found special support at the fire department-they offered to continue to collect for her. Then she went on to the police and sheriff's departments in Fortuna and Eureka.

The one thing she wouldn't do was post Megan's picture in a business window or on a bulletin board. Merchants could verify the legitimacy of the cause through the bank and Brie Valenzuela, attorney.

At the end of each day she went to the bank to make a deposit and get a balance. The first couple of days it was modest-a couple hundred here, couple hundred there. And the end of the day before meeting up with Paddy, she drove to the Thicksons' house to update them on her progress. Then on the fourth day, Friday, there was a huge surge in donations. Up to this point Angie had collected six hundred and change, when someone suddenly made a thousand-dollar deposit. It was an anonymous donation.

"How does something like this happen?" she asked the teller.

"Word of mouth, I'm sure," she said.

"Maybe firefighters or police-they said they'd continue collecting. But I'd planned to go back next week and see what kind of results they had."

"No matter who's responsible, the result is very nice," the teller said with a smile.

"I wasn't complaining," Angie said. "I'm stunned."

Angie was excited to tell Megan and her parents about the fund-which was nearing two thousand dollars-but she was even more eager to tell Patrick. They were spending the evening at his place tonight, and when she arrived, he was already cooking their dinner. She told him the news about the growing fund, and he was so proud of her, so happy for her, that he picked her up and spun her around.

As he served her dinner, she said, "A girl could really get used to this."

"So could a guy, but unfortunately there's that boat..."

"You ready to go back to the Navy, to the plane?" she asked him.

"Not sure yet. I've always wanted that life," he said.

"Even when it's dangerous?"

"Especially when it's dangerous," he answered. "The thing about a jet like that...you want the challenge it demands, and the rush is just unparalleled. The job it does can't be compared to anything else in my mind. But when there's a tragedy, like what happened with Jake, it shakes things up. I've had my doubts lately, wondered if I should move on to something with less rush and more stability." He looked into her eyes and said, "You know what I learned while sitting out some leave here?"

"I can't wait to hear."

"It's not something I'm real proud of, but it's a fact-I've always wanted Jake's life," he said.