"Are you going to?"

"I-I don't know."

"Fair enough. But he's going to find out, sooner or later. You stay here and your belly starts growing, he's going to figure it out."

"He hardly comes to the area where I'm staying."

Johnnie raised a brow. "That doesn't mean he's unaware of what's going on. He has one of the boys watching over you constantly. They have rotating shifts. So if he doesn't see with his own eyes, they will, and he'll find out."

"He has people following me?"

"Protecting you."

"Spying on me."

"Does it matter?" Johnnie snapped in frustration. He shrugged his shoulders. "Of course, we can make everybody think the kid is mine."

"I-I'll let you know," she promised.

He smiled. "Do that. Let's get you out of this weather."

Chapter 29.

Christopher checked the ammunition in his gun, the tequila boiling in his blood but not blotting out the hatred in his sisters' eyes or the fact that his mother had to have a closed casket. He couldn't forget the unreadable expression in Megan's eyes when she'd come to him, urged on by his cousin. Not because she gave a s.h.i.t about her father's killer. She was just a good girl with good manners.

She had absolutely no place in his world, and he had no place in hers. When their two worlds collided, death and destruction happened. He didn't have a kind heart. Nor a forgiving one. Once he made examples of the rebels, he'd never return out of the darkness.

The four men who'd deserted with Snake and the eight who'd been a.s.sisting Rack stood handcuffed, blindfolded and gagged. They were moments away from joining the three f.u.c.ks in the corner whom Christopher had killed with a more personal touch. The ones who'd dared touch Meggie and humiliate her. According to Val the ones who'd caused her to scream until she lost her f.u.c.king voice.

He held his semi-automatic up and glared at his brothers. "This is what happens to those who betray me."

Remorseless, he opened fire, pumping bullets into the men who'd had no second thought of planning his demise. It was over in a matter of minutes. He stared at the carnage.

This was his life. Megan Foy had absolutely no place in it.

Two hours later, he stood at the bar in the clubhouse, holding a bottle of gin. He couldn't believe it had just been this morning he'd been at the cemetery, telling his mother good-bye and hearing Meggie's sweet voice offering her sympathies.

He wore a pair of jeans, debating on whether or not he'd take one of the b.i.t.c.hes in his room to have his d.i.c.k sucked.

"Yo, John Boy," Val called and Christopher scowled, tipping back the bottle to swallow more booze.

What the f.u.c.k was his cousin doing here? He'd f.u.c.k him up if he was coming to lay blame at his feet over Patricia's death. He'd heard enough s.h.i.t from his sisters.

"Give me a beer, Bowlie," Johnnie said.

Christopher's eyes widened. His cousin wore his leather and his cut. "What's up?"

Johnnie shrugged. "Not much. I figured I needed to see what was going on. Been awhile."

"Yeah. Since Boss started his road to h.e.l.l."

Johnnie swigged his beer. "Yep."

"You back in all the way?"

"Dunno. That depends."

He had a feeling what it depended on, but he wouldn't discuss her. He'd done what he thought right by calling his cousin and asking him to invite Meggie to Patricia's services. He refused to give his verbal blessing for the dude to have her as his old lady.

"Ain't nothin' but a thing. Don't matter," Christopher added.

Johnnie stared at him. "Don't," he said quietly. "You need her."

"Yeah?"

"Yes."

"And what the f.u.c.k I'm gonna do with her? Kiss her goodbye and tell her to have a good day while I go work for the day? Only my job is dangerous as f.u.c.k. The kind that can get me killed or locked up." Or her killed.

"You don't care if you see her at functions, on the back of my bike, knowing she's just come out of my bed?"

"Shut the f.u.c.k up."

"And what about if she ends up pregnant? Maybe, I could use a condom but I want to feel her cun-"

Christopher jerked out of his stool, knocking it over and grabbing Johnnie's jacket. "Shut up before I rip your f.u.c.kin' d.i.c.k off."

Johnnie smiled calmly, stared into his eyes. "Lucky me, you already took care of that."

"I said-" Christopher's thoughts whooshed out of his mind like a vacuum cleaner had sucked them away. "She's havin' my kid?"

"Ummmhmmm."

"Well-"

"If you hadn't been licking your wounds, you would've noticed how her hand kept pressing to her belly. She'd gaze at you and look lost and forlorn and flushed. But she's young, scared, and confused. And you're not helping by trying to push her into my arms."

"She said that?"

"No. I'm saying it. I'm not a girl who's only had one lover and ended up pregnant."

"Johnnie-"

"I'm giving you one chance. I'd like to come back to the club. But I don't want to risk having a bullet in my a.s.s because she's in my bed. You p.i.s.s this chance away, she's fair game, Christopher. And I won't stop until she's mine."

Christopher studied him for a moment, searched his mind about how he'd feel if he didn't try for Meggie. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. He'd kill Johnnie, especially if his cousin had the nerve to make a play for her while she was still pregnant with Christopher's baby.

He'd get dressed and go reclaim his girl.

Chapter 30.

Megan sat alone in her motel room. She'd cried so much, she suspected she was dehydrated. She had to get past this crippling grief, though. She had to stay focused for her baby. Christopher's baby. She needed to be strong, but, she'd been suffering with morning sickness since Christopher had brought her there and forgotten about her. She knew her overwhelming sadness only added to her sickness.

Big Joe had been killed by the man she loved, the father of her unborn baby. In turn, her own brother killed Christopher's mother and, then, Christopher had killed her brother. It was all so surreal.

She stumbled to the dingy window. Lightning streaked across the sky, followed by a loud rumble of thunder. Staring at the darkened skies, she tried to get her head straight and figure out why so many people had to die.

She knew why. Because her father was cut from the same cloth as her brother. They were corrupt, evil personified. Maybe, with therapy they could've been saved. She'd never really known her dad, just seeing the best of him when he decided to visit. And she'd never get to acquaint herself with the brother she hadn't known about until a few weeks ago.

She shuffled back to the bed and sat, flinching at the thunder and pressing her hand against her belly.

While she was wallowing in grief and anger, Christopher was...what? He'd lost his mother and Meggie knew how much he'd loved Patricia. But he'd be Meggie's big bad biker and hide his grief.

She curled into a little ball, no longer able to deny how much she still loved him and how much she wanted to be there for him. She wanted him to be the father to their baby that her father hadn't been to her.

She screamed into the pillow. So what if her father and brother were dead? And Patricia. So what if Meggie would never get to know her better and really become her friend? Or introduce her to Christopher's baby? So what? People died every day.

But not people she knew. Not her own flesh and blood and three women who hadn't deserved to die. Because, in all her current grief and anger, somewhere inside of her the thought of Kiera and Ellen crept in from time to time.

She screamed again and pounded the bed, wondering if she was losing her mind. The rain started falling in sheets, beating against the roof and the window pane. She sat up, hungry and weak. She needed to get to the minimart when the rain let up. She wanted a Milky Way and some chocolate milk. She wanted...what?

Swallowing, she made her way to the bathroom and turned on the tap, splashing her face with cold water. Her mirrored reflection revealed the mess of her red, swollen eyes, puffy face, and hair hanging like limp noodles.

Pulling a strip of toilet paper from the roll, she blew her nose, then dried her face with a towel from the rack. She drew in a deep breath. Her mother had loved Big Joe, too. Maybe, Dinah could be a comfort to her. Meggie would never tell her mom everything, but she'd have someone to grieve with her where she wouldn't feel guilty because she was grieving.

She pushed her tears aside and walked out of the bathroom. Sitting on the side of the bed, she dialed her home number. It was safe since Christopher had one of the boys watching over her. They wouldn't let Thomas get anywhere near her if, by any chance, he saw the motel number on Caller ID.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Daddy's dead." Meggie sniffled around the words, the moment her mother picked up. Her hand trembled as she held the receiver. Silence. "Did you hear me, Momma?"

"Yes," Dinah whispered. A hiccupped sob escaped her. "Are you all right, baby?"

Meggie bit her lip. She wanted so badly to have her mother with her, especially now. She knew she couldn't and wouldn't. Dinah was too afraid to leave Thomas and Meggie could never return to live with them. As much as she wanted to protect her mother, she had her baby to think of. She swallowed, tears slipping down her cheeks. "I can't believe he's gone!" she cried. "I just wish I'd gotten to talk to him one last time like you did."

"So that's why you left," Dinah said dully. "You heard what I said to Thomas."

"Yes. And I thought Daddy could protect me and rescue you. He would've."

"Oh Meggie. My sweet Meggie. He...I...he never said anything. I never spoke to him," she admitted. "I just wanted Thomas to leave you alone. If he thought Big Joe was coming..."

Her mother's voice trailed off.

"I hurt him, Meggie. I never should have...he loved you so much. Seeing you kept him focused and I took that away from him. I ruined his life."

"No, of course you didn't," Meggie soothed. "You-"

"I was angry," Dinah confessed. "I couldn't stand...I hated his lifestyle. I detested the fact that he had another child."

"You knew?" Meggie squeaked. "About his son?"

Silence met the shocked question, then Dinah sighed. "Yes. And..."

"And?" Meggie prompted when Dinah's voice trailed off.

"I wanted to have a son for him, too. I didn't think he'd have any place in his life for a daughter. But I was wrong. He loved you with everything in him. There were always so many women around. I was afraid to leave him around them and I refused to have anything to do with the MC."

"It's okay, Momma. We all make mistakes that we end up regretting. Only, at the time, we think it's the right thing to do. None of us have a crystal ball to know our decisions are the right ones. Even if we did, I think it would be pretty boring to get everything right. We'd never learn. We'd never love, for that matter."

"Yes. You're right." Dinah cleared her throat. "Will you come back home?"

How could she ask that? "I'm having a baby," Meggie admitted softly.

"Oh dear G.o.d! He got to you, didn't he? That's why you ran away."

"Thomas never-" Touched me. The lie died on her lips because Thomas had touched her. He just hadn't penetrated her. "We never had s.e.x." She sh.o.r.ed up her courage, knowing this had to be said. "He fondled me. But that's all."

"I wish he'd die!" Dinah spat vehemently.

Meggie did, too. Since that wouldn't happen anytime soon, another approach was necessary. "Do you have your pa.s.sport?"

"My...? Yes. Why?"

"Why don't you go to Europe? Start over."

"Alone?"

"Um..."

"I went straight from my parents' house to living with your father. Then I had you and I haven't been alone since."

"Don't worry about me," Meggie said. "You need to leave to save your life. Get away from the monster you married."