The moment she reached them, she put her hand on Dylan's arm. He flinched, turned to her, and dread washed over his face.

He didn't want to see her.

No one said anything. The girl had a challenge in her eye, as she watched Dylan.

Finally, the girl broke the tension. "So, this is her? Nicole?"

Dylan's mom, swallowed up in her oversize black parka, snapped to attention. She took one step forward, her expression turning livid. "This is her? This is why you dumped me in the fucking loony bin? For this cunt?"

Ice cold shock slashed through her, and her fingers curled into Dylan's arm.

He spun around to his mom. "Don't you ever talk to her like that. Jesus Christ. Get in the car and wait for me."

"Fuck you. Fuck you! You're not hiding me away again so you can spend more time with the rich bitch. What's so special about her? She's nothing. Nothing."

"Mom." His bark reverberated down to Nicole's bones. He got right in his mom's face. "You talk about my girlfriend that way again, and things will not go down well here."

Long, awful seconds passed, where mother and son held each other's angry, searching gazes. The crazy seemed to ebb and flow in his mom's eyes, until it finally drained. Her shoulders relaxed, and she let out a rough breath.

Kelsi reached for Dylan. "Let's just go, okay?"

He yanked out of Kelsi's hold. "I need you both to wait in the car, so I can talk to Nicole privately."

"You're doing it again." His mom's voice turned low and scary. She pushed up the sleeves of her coat, revealing frayed white bandages wrapped around her wrists. "So help me God, you leave me for that uptight bitch, and I'll run into traffic right now. I will fucking finish the job."

"She's high?" Dylan grabbed Kelsi's arm roughly. "Did you give her something?"

"Fuck you." Kelsi yanked away. "You have no right. No right."

Oh, God. Nicole's heart ached for Dylan. His mom had tried to commit suicide. That was why they'd driven out here. But would she do it? Would she actually run into traffic?

The woman's lip curled into a sneer. "What are you staring at, you stupid bitch?"

Maybe if she hadn't had an alcoholic mom who'd yelled and snarled and screamed to be left alone, maybe then this woman could intimidate her. But she had had that mom, so Nicole's only thought was for Dylan. His agonized expression had her focusing solely on him. "How can I help?"

"Help?" His mom faked a laugh. "That's hysterical coming from you. You can help by getting the fuck out of my face and out of my son's life."

"Mom." She'd never heard him sound so scary. The veins in his neck popped and strained. The muscles in his arms bulged.

She touched him, trying to get him to focus on her. "Hey, talk to me. Where are you going? Do they have somewhere to stay?" She couldn't invite them to her home-not with his mom this angry-but she could at least set them up in a hotel. She pulled out her phone to look up Times Square hotels.

His big hands closed over hers, making her realize she was shaking. "Nic, stop. I have to go."

"I'll get you a hotel." She waited for the hotels to load. "You shouldn't drive anywhere tonight."

Dylan closed his eyes, looking like he wanted to die. "No. Nicole, you-"

"What do you mean no?" his mom said. "What're we gonna do, sleep in the car? Do you know what we've eaten the last three days? Jerky and granola bars. Let her set us up in a hotel." Her mom strutted up to her, hand out. "We need some cash, too."

"That's not a problem." Nicole tucked her phone back into her clutch. "Let me find an ATM."

But Dylan hooked an arm around her waist and towed her back. "No. I'm not taking your money."

"Dylan, I don't care. Let me help." She had to do something.

"Yeah," his mom said. "Let her help. She fucking owes us."

"I don't take money from anybody." His hardened tone felt like a door slamming in her face.

Tears stung, and she sucked in a sharp breath. "I'm not anybody. It's me." She hated how her voice wobbled.

Kelsi slid a hand between them, letting her palm rest on Dylan's stomach. Looking disgusted, he jerked away from them and headed to his mom, grabbing her arm and leading her to the car.

Alone on the crowded street with Dylan's ex, Nicole had no idea what to do. She should probably let him go, but...it was hard. Because if he left right now...what would it mean? Was he leaving her?

And then Kelsi's bitchy voice broke through. "Just go, okay? Go back to your friends."

"No, I..." She looked helplessly to Dylan, restraining his mom-kicking and screaming, as though she wanted to make a break for the heavy traffic of Avenue of the Americas.

"You're just making this harder for him," Kelsi said.

"I want to help."

"Come on, Nicole. How can you help when you're the problem?"

CHAPTER TWENTY.

Nicole blinked against the bright light slanting in through the crack in her curtain. Why hadn't she fixed that already?

Oh, right. Because she'd liked that little slice of light when she'd had Dylan beside her. She loved to see moonlight glowing on his powerful body.

Her eyes squeezed shut at the pain barreling through her, making her whole body clench. It didn't fade. It didn't get easier.

She'd known he wouldn't choose her. Of course she had. He'd never misled her. And, of course, it was his mother they were talking about. Of course he had to choose her.

Rolling onto her side, her gaze fell on her textbooks, the slim laptop case she hadn't opened in...a while. What time was it? She reached for her phone. Twelve-oh-three.

A bolt of fear shot her out of bed. Twelve-oh-three meant she'd missed two classes. Wait, oh, God, what day was it? She checked the phone again. The eighth.

The eighth. What did that mean? What classes did she have today? Oh, okay. Just a lab at four. God, she was exhausted. She settled back down, got under the covers and drew them up to her chin, one piece of it covering her ear. Funny, she hadn't done that in ages. Not since she'd lived with her mom. Everything had scared her back then, including the fear of spiders crawling in her ears. Had she read that somewhere? That spiders crawled into ears?

A soft knock at her door jolted her out of her rambling reveries. It could only be either James or Sydney. "Come in."

Hallway light flooded her room, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Someone sat on the edge of the bed-someone big, considering the way the bed dipped so much she nearly rolled forward. A big hand clamped down on top of her head.

Only one person had a hand that big. She opened her eyes. "Dad?"

"Get dressed. We're going for a walk."

Weak and a little light-headed, Nicole could barely keep up with her dad. "Over here." She led him down the path toward her favorite spot in the garden.

"Nice." He took in the curving cement islands, the stretches of grass, the tall iron sculptures. "Spend a lot of time in here, do ya?"

She murmured a response, a sense of relief coming over her when she got to her bench and collapsed on it. Even though she was bundled up in parka, knit hat, gloves, and a scarf wrapped all the way up to her nose, the cold still burned her skin, making her bones ache.

Her dad sat beside her. "Cold as hell today."

"What're you doing here, Dad?" He'd already reassured her the boys were okay, Brandon safely back at school, Ryan gearing up for his final semester in college.

"I got a call from your friend."

She shot him a look. "James?" How did he have her dad's number? He'd probably gotten it off her phone.

He nodded, his nose red, his skin looking dry and chapped. "Yep."

Oh, James. She wished he hadn't involved her dad. "What did he say?"

"That you're not doing so well."

"Oh, no, Dad, I'm fine. I swear, I'm just fine." God, he'd come all the way out there.

"Nicole..." He gave her a disbelieving look. "You've lost your sparkle, sweet pea."

"It's been a week. I've haven't hit the limit on eating ice cream and wearing stained clothes yet."

Her dad settled back. "Aw, pumpkin, love sucks."

Laughter shot out of her. She hadn't expected to hear that. "That's what you drove five hours to tell me?"

"Naw, I'm sure you figured that out on your own. But maybe you haven't figured out that it's not the love itself that's the problem. It's the people. We're messed up. You know that, right? And it's pretty hard to love when you're all twisted up inside."

"I know, Dad. He has to take care of his mom. He told me from the start."

"I'm not talking about Dylan. I'm talking about you." He watched her, waiting.

"You think I'm messed up?" Her heart ached, and she really needed to lie down.

"Yeah, I do. We all are. Thing is, I know you're hurting, but what you're feeling right now is more than just a broken heart. You've got some old fears tangled up with it."

"This isn't about fear. I gave him my whole heart, Dad, and he didn't want it. It hurts, okay? I hurt. I just need a few days, and then I'll be fine." And she would. It wasn't like she'd never had a broken heart before.

He pressed his lips together, getting that stubborn look he had. "I don't want you to be fine. Fine isn't good enough. Not for my girl. And I wouldn't be here if I thought you were just getting over a broken heart. That, you can do on your own."

She reached into her pocket for a tissue and swiped at her nose. "Then what're you here for?"

He reached for her hand. "You know what's killing me right now?"

She held his gaze and saw true concern. And that just knocked the stuffing right out of her, leaving nothing but sadness. "What?"

"I'm looking into the eyes of that little girl I used to pick up from her mom's place on the weekend."

"That's...what...no. Why would you say that?" Her mind grappled for traction while it spun and whirled. "I'm not that girl anymore. I don't... God, I'm not...I don't hoard food."

"No, you don't. But this thing with Dylan's pushing all your buttons."

"Well, of course it does, Dad. My mom and Jonathan chose booze over me. Dylan chose his mother. I mean, how do you keep putting your heart out there when no one chooses you? It sucks. And it scares me to death."

He reached for her hand-his gloved in leather, hers in wool-but she still felt his firm grasp. "I know it does, angel. Anyone who's ever lived with an addict knows that same fear. We want them to change so badly, and when they don't, it messes with our heads. Makes us feel helpless. You just wanted your mom to love you more than the booze. When she didn't, that had to make you feel like there was something wrong with you. But there wasn't." He lifted their joined hands, tugged, so she'd look at him. "I want you to know that, sweetheart. You were one hell of a little girl."

Oh. A rush of heat flooded her. He'd never said anything like that to her before.

Her dad smiled broadly, pride and affection glowing in his eyes. "Your mom's neglect probably made you think you weren't loveable. And I'm guessing that's what's going on here with Dylan. You think he didn't choose you, which hits that same nerve." He brought his hands to his mouth, cheeks puffing out as he blew into them. "So, that's why I drove five hours to see you. To make sure you understand that your mom's choice, Jonathan's choice, Dylan's choice is not about you. You're exceptional. A gem. And Dylan knows that. He loves you, and he'd choose you every day if he could."

"But he didn't."

"You've got it wrong. He thinks his happiness-you-comes at the cost of his mom." He shifted to face her. "But those are his issues. I want you to understand that you were a kid when this happened with your mom. You felt helpless. If there was no food in the house, you didn't eat. If she didn't get you to school, you didn't go. How many times did you think she was dead?"

Nicole startled at the blunt question.

"How many times did you shake her, crying your eyes out, trying to get her to wake up?" He shook his head, and she thought she saw a gleam of moisture in his eyes.

"A lot." All those sickening feelings popped right back up to the surface. "I don't know what this has to do with Dylan." She didn't want to feel them. The horror at seeing her mom's lifeless body, the desperation in trying to get her to wake up. The utter helplessness she'd felt for years.

"When your mom chose booze, it meant you were hungry, alone, dirty, and lost. Remember the time that dog came into the yard?"

She held up a hand to stop him. That ferocious dog snarled, barked, drooled, and lurched toward her. She'd screamed, terror wracking her body, but no one came. When she'd finally gotten into the house, she'd run to the living room to find her mom passed out on the couch.

"I remember." She hadn't thought about that incident in years-yet she felt the fear as vividly just then as when she'd experienced it.

"You were helpless back then. This time...this time, sweet pea, you're a woman. You can take care of yourself. Now, I know he broke your heart, but you're not helpless."

Her chest tightened so hard it ached. His words connected right with her heart.

"What I'm saying is, you can handle this one. You'll hurt, but you can take care of yourself. And you should. You can't fight someone's demons. No one knows that better than us."

Us. Tears burned in her eyes. Why did hearing him say us touch her so deeply?

She sucked in a cold, shaky breath. Because she wasn't alone. He was here for her. He understood her.

Her dad's big hand clamped down on her knee. "But you also can't let those demons take you down. You love with all your heart, and that's a good thing. Don't stop doing that because it didn't work out with Dylan. Don't let someone else's failings shut down your beautiful heart. You carry on, and you try again."