Happiness Perfected

There are moments when perfection stands in time and s.p.a.ce, when the beauty of the moment does not need to be explained, because no words are strong enough. Those are the most beautiful moments in life. When the sunset meets the sea, when the raindrops meet the thirsty crusts of the earth, when the waves hug the sh.o.r.e, when the storm ends and the rainbow begins, when a baby smiles or holds your hand. When beauty meets modesty, when humbleness meets sincerity, when sadness meets empathy, when happiness meets genuineness. Those moments cannot be recreated. They cannot be equated with a price, and neither can happiness. So if you took your happiness from those moments, could you even try to put a price on it? Would you even try to get your happiness from things that are sold and bought? Would it even be possible for you to love people for what they have rather than for who they truly are?

Let Me Be Your Weakness

You are the weakness of those who love you. When they look at you, they see past your face. They feel greatness standing in front of them. They see happiness that they feel they don't deserve. They are willing to stand aside and see you shine rather than risk standing by your side, because they feel that they just might not give you the happiness that you deserve. Admire those who respect you even though they know how forgiving you'd be if they didn't. Those deserving of your love don't take advantage of your ability to forgive because they know how hard it is to forget. Admire those who are kind to you even though they know that you would make an excuse for them if they didn't. Those who love you don't take advantage of your innocence because they know how hard it is to maintain a white heart in a dark world. I admire those who strengthen me even though they know my weaknesses. I admire those who acknowledge my presence even when I feel invisible, because those are the ones who will understand my silence when I feel that my words are choking on disappointment. I admire those who see me as different, but I love those who see me as unique.

Too Proud

I may be too proud to tell you how I feel or that I need your care. I may be too proud to express how much it means to me that you are doing well and that you are happy. I admit that I am too proud to admit that I have feelings. The thing is, people only see extremes. So, I would rather seem arrogant than needy, although I am not needy. I would rather seem strong than desperate, although I am not desperate. I just want to be content, so I don't want to ask for more. I just want to be happy. If I ask you to care, your care will only be a compliment. It will not be genuine. If I ask you to respect me, your respect will seem like a burden to you. If I ask you to love me, your love will be out of pity. I will keep my pride, and you continue to be blind. But you should know that life is always easier for the one who's loved because all he or she has to do is love back instead of fall in love with the unknown. Life is always easier for the one who is cared for because all he or she has to do is care back instead of care unconditionally. I made my decision to take a risk. Now you make yours.

Childhood Nostalgia

As a child, you usually make decisions without thinking of the consequences. You just think of the result that you're going to get. Before you jump, you don't think of the fall, but you think of where it'll get you. You don't care who's watching, or what they will think. Before you speak, you don't think of who's listening other than the person you're talking to. You don't know what judging means. You make spontaneous decisions, often about going for the things that will give you instant happiness and moving away from the things that cause you any kind of stress. I want to be a child again. I want to jump and fall a million times. I want to not care about what anyone thinks as long as I am happy with my decisions. I want to be a child again. My dear self, please let me be a child again.

Questions Unanswered

The questions that you have may be too long, too complicated, or just confusing. A mighty ship lost in the ocean may be stuck in troubled waters, calm on some days and raging on others. So are we in times of hardships and in times of uncertainty. We feel trapped when no trap can contain the amount of agony that we have. We feel our hearts caged when no cage can contain the amount of heartache that we have. Happiness and sadness swing us between the sh.o.r.es of anger and forgiveness. Our hearts may ache for an answer, but the truth is, the lack of an answer is sometimes better than the presence of a lie.

Be a Treasure

Treasures are sought because they are unique. They are different. They are timeless, despite the time that pa.s.ses after they come to existence. They are not easily found because, to get to them, one must work hard. One must dig deep. One must appreciate the value at hand. You are deep. You are valuable. So let others dig you up.

It's Time to Change

The first obstacle to change is feeling the need to give those around you an excuse. You don't have to explain, but it's okay if you do. Most likely, it is those around you who have made you realize that you need to change, so why would you explain? Would you explain to someone why you're watering a withering flower? Would you explain why you're feeding a hungry person? Would you explain why you're breathing? You don't need to explain why you're protecting your soul from harm. You really don't.

Want Me

Don't tell me there's no place for innocent hearts in this world. Don't tell me I need to accept what I don't believe in. I respect it. Don't confuse my values for my stubbornness, although I am stubborn. Don't confuse my positive att.i.tude for being naive. Allow me to wrap my heart around you for a moment. Listen to this. Innocent hearts may not belong anywhere in this world but they are big enough for any heart in this world. Innocent hearts belong in innocent hearts. Innocent hearts belong in the hearts of those who genuinely want happiness.

Lead Your Heart

Don't tell me to follow my heart. My heart is innocent. The world is not. My heart sees the best in people when that best might not exist. My heart beats to hopeless hope, flutters to dishonest promises, and sings to unwritten tunes of fake melodies. As it pumps clean blood through my veins, it takes in every impurity aimed at it from the darkness of the world and turns it into a pure thought, a pure smile, or a beautiful lesson. Don't tell me to follow my heart, for following my heart will burn me. Just as a b.u.t.terfly's aching for light can burn its wings, my heart's aching for happiness might stop it from beating. I want to lead my heart to the harbor of safety. I want the reality that my mind sees, not the reality that it wants, to lead my heart. I want my heart to be just like air: felt, although it cannot be seen, and essential to the existence of another, although its love cannot be contained.

Follow Your Soul

No one knows what you need to do more than you do. Cry when you need to. It's relieving. Laugh when you need to. It's healing. Sit alone when you need to. It's necessary. Surround yourself with strangers when you need to. It's eye-opening. Living by your needs is not easy. No one said it was. But a fact that you should always remember is this: you are more worthy of being taken care of than anyone around you. And I don't mean the superficial kind of care. I mean the care that your soul needs. Everyone around you is struggling somehow. Everyone around you is trying to reach a goal, a destination, or a dream. Just as you might not expose your worries to the world, no one else has to. Remember that you are a work in progress. You are not perfect. You are not expected to be. Do not allow the fear of falling to stop you from jumping. Do not allow the fear of responsibility to stop you from committing. Do not allow the fear of exposure to stop you from shining.

My Philosophy

I cannot count the number of times I've been told not to be too nice to people because it will hurt me. After giving this much thought, my response is simple. When I'm too nice because I have a hidden purpose, others have the right to hurt me, because people are not made to be used but to be loved and respected. When I'm nice for the sake of actually caring about others, and living by my values, then no matter what others' responses are, they can't hurt me. I tell myself that I am being kind to the world, not specific people. Be content with yourself and always smile. If the world smiles back, that's great. If it doesn't, then that's great too, because despite the harshness around you, you are still able to stick to your beliefs, values, and character with a genuine smile.

Break Free from the Illusion of Power

The realities that we are forced to accept in life are sometimes very challenging. Most people will tell you that you need to accept the good and the bad and just be quiet, as long as you're not harmed, as long as accepting and being silent keeps you in your place or moves you forward instead of taking away from what you already have. It is sad but true. We are faced with people daily who tell us that patience is suffering in silence. We are faced with people daily who tell us that following is better than leading and that obeying orders is better than questioning those orders. They disregard the fact that questioning someone's orders or opinions is not a disrespectful act towards those individuals. My philosophy in life and my beliefs request of me to respect myself before I respect anyone else, because if respecting someone else jeopardizes my own respect, then that respect is superficial, invalid, and insincere. My beliefs force me to question everything that comes my way, regardless of where it comes from.

Hollow Hopes

We often build hopes and dreams on a.s.sumptions created by our own minds. We design these hopes and dreams exactly the way we desire them to be. They become part of us, part of our own ident.i.ty, because we authentically created them. An a.s.sumption based on something that we aspire to spurs an idea or question in the mind, and after that, every event that happens serves to either confirm or disprove that a.s.sumption. Most times, events will confirm our a.s.sumptions, not because they are clear, but because they don't blatantly disprove them. Our default belief is that our a.s.sumption was real. Although this defies logic, realistically, it is a logical sequence of steps that our minds go through. Our minds draw illusions of things we love to see, and our ears hear what we would love to hear. We love the feeling of instant gratification that we get from proving our thoughts. The truth is, a million proofs of confirmation, and a million proofs of disproof, are easier than one maybe. Maybe yes. Maybe no. That is why we like our questions to be answered, no matter what the answer is. And, it is easier for our minds and hearts to answer with a yes than with a no because our natural instinct will push us to avoid the disappointment of a no.

Common Sense?

We often forget that common sense isn't always good sense. We conform to what those around us expect, what they consider to be right or wrong, what they consider to be a duty or a privilege, what they consider to be better or worse. We accept the way that people are ranked, as if people were made to be put in some kind of order based on a set of predetermined criteria. Beauty. Money. Power. Status. Appealing, aren't they? We automatically make ourselves followers of and believers in such ranks. We even place ourselves as better than some people and worse than others. Why? Because we are living proof that this way of thinking works. So what do we do? We make a choice to either make our minds follow or lead. Most of us stay in the middle. We recognize what is morally wrong, but we wait for someone brave, someone not afraid to speak up and verbalize what is wrong, and we follow that person. Instead of following the lead of our minds, we follow the lead of people. We forget that a true leader is one who aspires to make those around him think critically and perceive the world with an open mind. To honor a true leader, you don't follow them; you show them that their philosophies and actions encouraged you to free your mind to think. When a leader that we blindly follow makes a mistake, we love being able to blame them for leading us to a dead end. We make ourselves slaves to others' beliefs, make our eyes blind, cuff our hands, and nullify our ability to think, judge, silence our hearts, and follow. Then, we blame others for ending up with us at the wrong place. It doesn't make sense. Does it?

Dreams Unfinished

The nature of life makes it inevitable for people's paths and journeys to cross. So, unless you're willing to be the source of disappointment for someone, don't rush to start a plan and then leave it for time to complete. It will become a burden more than a goal. Yes, time helps but only if you use it. Waiting and pa.s.sing time is a waste. Instead of starting, waiting, and then completing, you should wait for the right time, then start and complete. Don't open a door you know you can't close, and don't open a door without walking through it. Don't let the fear of the unknown stop you from taking a step towards it. If you're not up for the challenges that may come your way in reaching that goal of yours, then simply don't pursue it. If you're not willing to put forward whatever it takes to reach your goal, then don't aim for it. I am not saying that ends justify means. All I'm saying is, if you don't have the willpower to take the steps that you need to reach that end, don't put your means to use and don't waste your time and others'. If you ignite a fire that you're not willing to contain, the amount of harm it can cause can't be measured, and most times it can't be reversed.

No One's Watching

Would you do all of the things that you normally do if you knew that no one was watching? When was the last time you did something good, without anyone knowing about it, and felt like you'd accomplished something? We tend to wait for people to praise us for the things that we do so we can feel that there was a value for what we did. We add meaning to what we do through the way that we know people will perceive it, and this is relative. It is relative to who we are trying to impress, at which time, and for what purpose. It is an innate drive that makes us want to be perceived in the most positive way by those who appeal most to us, or those who have the power to have an impact in our lives. It is not wrong to want to be perceived in a good way. We all want to be good people. But, this becomes problematic when that praise that we receive becomes the purpose of what we do. Instead of wanting to do good things because of the goodness in our hearts, we want to do good things because we want to impress others, to seem better than others, or even to compete with others. When we have sincere intentions, nothing can stand in the way of us feeling happy and content with what we do. The beautiful part is that the rays of a shining light will eventually penetrate through the darkest of nights, and people will see how truly good you are without you going out of your way to prove it. Some of the most beautiful plants have their beginnings unnoticed under rocks, but that only makes them stronger. If the goal of the sun was to impress us with its light, it would rise when we wake up and set after we sleep.

An Enigmatic Feeling