Master Is Pregnant - Chapter 3: Something Funny Is Going To Happen
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Chapter 3: Something Funny Is Going To Happen

Tao the Second Childe didn’t come back at dusk. I looked around for a while and begun eating because I was extremely hungry.

Yan Wu gave me a strange look.

"Are you a hungry ghost? Why are you eating like a horse?"

Lian’er t.i.ttered behind her hands, "Master is a reborn goat."

I heard! I had heard it!

I gave her a soppy stare and said, "It’s all the same to me. Neither of my appet.i.te can be satisfied…"

Some of them were suddenly choked on tea. Thin-skinned person such as Master s.h.i.+fu and Qiao the Forth Childe lowered their heads. The Third Childe cast sheep's eyes at me. While Yan the Fifth who sat next to me, whispered in my ear, "You look so sentimental. Are you blaming us for not doing our best?"

I shuddered. ‘Well, I just complained about Master s.h.i.+fu, and please don’t get me wrong…’

But I dare not say that, and I just shut up and ate.

How I missed my brother, Tao the Second Childe! If he were here, no one would have rebelled against me! Even Yan the Fifth was obedient to him, and he was really a master of a clan!

I led Lian’er to go shopping after dinner. Oh no, it was Lian’er who led me to go shopping.

I was master nominally in our family. In fact, Tao the Second Childe ranked number one because he was best at marital arts, treated violence with violence, and earned money to support the family. Well, as the saying goes, whoever feeds you is your G.o.d... Master s.h.i.+fu ranked the second because he was the most learned man among a group of men of prowess. The Third Childe, the Forth and the Fifth Childe were tied for the third place, because they could not convince each other. Next was Lian’er. Although she was not a housekeeper, she watched over me. (I, as a master, really wanted to cry...) Then there was the Red Eagle, pet of Tao the Second, it ate better than me every day... Then followed XX, XX, x.x.x...

It was finally my turn when we walked to the East Main Street. Then I was followed by two stone lions guarding in front of Li Mansion. Well, that was it. Basically, I was a master who enjoyed no status…

Today was the Lantern Festival. A crowd of youngsters stood under a century-old tree in the corner of East Main Street, tossing red ribbons up. I heard that if someone wrote best wishes on red ribbons and tossed it up to a branch, his/her wish would come true.

Lian’er seemed to be very interested in it. She said to me, "Master, are we gonna do this?"

I glanced at her and said lightly, "You’ve always been free to go since you have money."

Tao the Second Childe once said that women would go bad when she was rich, so I was the poorest at home.

When I thought about it, I felt like crying.

Lian’er probably noticed that I was slightly depressed, so she came to comfort me, "Don't be sad, master. Let's toss a red ribbon up."

Some peddlers were selling red ribbons under the tree. A red ribbon was worth 20 coins, which was simply robbery! I could buy a small greasy chicken with 20 coins!

Tao the Second said that the world of Li Yingyu was crammed with small greasy chicken, and for me, the small greasy chicken was equivalent to money and everything. That was exactly true.

I snorted: "I have so many wishes that they cannot be written down even if we buy all the red ribbons!"

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Lian’er copied me, snorted and held her hands against her heart. "Master, you are too greedy!"

I counted in a whisper, “First, I wish to eat greasy chicken every day, and secondly I wish that Master s.h.i.+fu would offer himself to me. Thirdly, I hope that there will be no quarrels between the Third Childe and the Forth Childe. Fourthly, I wish the Fifth Childe stop feeding me with decoction any more. Fifthly, I wish Tao the Second gives me some pocket money. Then I hope Lian’er is gentle to me..."

Lian’er interrupted me, "Master, that’s way out of line!"

I squatted under the tree and drew circles under the ground. "I know that you don't like me..."

Lian’er gave me a red ribbon and said, "Only one wis.h.!.+"

Why was she so hard on me? I would rather have twenty coins, then my first wish would come true at once.

I felt depressed, troubled, and pulled my hair... (This habit would appear frequently in this novel…)

In the end, I wrote a wish: "May all go well with me! May all my wishes come true! May I can do whatever I want…"

I stopped writing with satisfaction until the red ribbon was filled with words, and I looked up but Lian’er disappeared...

Did I crouch down so low that she couldn’t see me?

That made sense, we were easy to be separated since it was crowded here. I chuckled...

My b.u.t.t was accidentally kicked while I was thinking, and I fell forward in a very unpleasant and funny manner.

"Ouch..." I frowned and screamed. If the Childes in my family knew that someone dared to kick my b.u.t.t, he should not be able to sit on the bench for a lifetime. There was an unwritten rule in my family: Only family members were allowed to bully Master in the world, and the others were not.

At this moment, in general, a handsome man would come from the sky and reach out a white slender hand to me. He would say affectionately, "Are you alright?”

Then I would hold his hand and stand up foolishly and shyly, running straight into his arms...

While the fact was that I was no longer young. Now I was full of resentment just as a dissatisfied wife that was in a mood to even curse the G.o.ds and Buddhas. I rubbed my b.u.t.t, stood up, and was pushed into the crowd, unaware of where I was going.

When I stopped, I finally knew where I was.

Right in front of me was the Triplet Pleasure-boat beside the river, where the most popular courtesan would be elected.

Something funny was going to happen!