Book 11: Chapter 144

I almost projectile vomited a ten-metre-long trail of blood. Why did dual cultivation come to mind?!

Ive always been interested in dual cultivation. Ive been flipping through martial arts manuals without discrimination for years and found around ten manuals. Since medicine and herbs wont work for you, we can try manual by manual. Young s.h.i.+yi hiked up a corner of her lips. You dont want to?

I gulped. Uh, Im not against it

So you approve?

I d-, no!

Grandmaster would make me kneel by the village gates for three years with a board dangling from my neck that says, Im a lecher who slept with his grandaunt. Please spit on me for three coins per rep! Grandmaster could body me when I could fight, never mind now that I had lost my abilities!

Young s.h.i.+yi frowned. You have a problem with it?

Will my punishment be waivered if I dont?! Grandmaster would lay me out!

Young s.h.i.+yi cuddled my head. Even if he does, Ill take care of you. Besides, Young s.h.i.+yi cupped my face at close proximity to hers, youd still be winning even if you did get beat Its worth it.

Sound! Im down! Ill take as many beatings from as many people as they come. If I even grimace, Ill call myself a wuss. Grandmaster? s.h.i.+fu? Mount Daluo? Jade Emperor? Ill take anything they have to give!

Im in!

Good! Young s.h.i.+yi covered her dimple behind her hand.

Wait, wait, wait!

Dual cultivation with my grandaunt is going too far! At least, wait until, you know

Until what? We can freely practice dual cultivation after whatever it is?

Not freely! With a straight face, I wagged my hand. We can think about the procedure.

Oho? Young s.h.i.+yi brushed my chest with her fingertip, while her body was close enough for me to smell her. Lets have our first cla.s.s today, then.

First cla.s.s?

Is this really good idea?

This isnt the right place for it, though, no? Members of the imperial court are ubiquitous here.

Feizhen, martial artists are not so shallow. For instance, dual cultivation is a profound path to sagehood. Dont lewd it. Her a.s.sertion wasnt remotely convincing when her eagerness was written all over her face. But, she wore on a stern visage upon reading my mind. Listen carefully: you dont have any internal energy at the moment, which renders you hyper p.r.o.ne to qi deviation. What do we do if your training exacerbates your condition? Have you forgotten what happened when you got hurt in training?

That is an inaccurate recollection! It wasnt I who wasnt serious when training. It was s.h.i.+fu who wasnt serious! No matter how cautious I was, there was no helping it!

What do you mean by first cla.s.s? We dont know any dual cultivation disciplines. Without a manual, isnt it just purely

Purely what?

Purely

that

?

Young s.h.i.+yi removed her hand on my chest to clock me on the head. Here I am teaching you how to recover, while youre only having lewd thoughts.

Seeing Young s.h.i.+yi so sensually cheerful, I couldnt help blurting, Producing life is n.o.ble very n.o.ble.

Young s.h.i.+yi looked away. Its pretty warm in here. Shall we open the window?

I didnt point out the fact that I could tell Young s.h.i.+yi had fallen into her habit of looking away whenever she blushed. Smiling, I said, In that case, well leave the dual cultivation topic there for now.

Young s.h.i.+yis eyelids flapped rapidly. Why?

To avoid something bad happening. We can discuss it again once we get our hands on our manual.

I have one on me.

Seriously?

Yeah, look. Young s.h.i.+yi tossed down a book. I took this from Vast Sea Submerged Pearl Hall, you know?

The t.i.tle on the white cover read, Fiery Uncontainable Loneliness.

What sort of blasted martial arts name is this?!

This is a p.o.r.no, isnt it?! As if theres any discipline with this name!

Young s.h.i.+yi pouted. What are you making a fuss for? Theyre just ordinary words. Fiery obviously refers to Yang Realm. Yang energy is the foundation, so heat manifests as an external phenomenon. Uncontainable refers to strengthening ones body to contain pain. Its likely just another way of referring to cleansing ones body and tempering it. Loneliness should be the most obvious; it refers to the mental state when training. Ones mind and body are connected when learning advanced disciplines. How is this any different to Melancholic Palms? Stop making a fuss over nothing.

Im making a fuss over nothing? The name gives away the fact thats perverted material! How did you even come up with that legitimate-sounding interpretation?! Now I cant stop a.n.a.lysing the name Melancholic Palms!

Youre prejudice. Young s.h.i.+yi vexingly flipped through the manual. Ah, theres a nude maiden.

Im telling it has to be a p.o.r.n book! The t.i.tle is lewd. The contents are even more professional. Oh, even the man is naked. Average artists cant draw this position. Yeah, this is a pros work. Look at the lines. Look at the points emphasised. Look at the perfectly controlled rouge. This is grandmaster-level artistry.

Dont question a man whos read one hundred and eight thousand p.o.r.n books!

Glossary

Melancholic Palms I dont want to think readers dont recognise this name, but in the case you dont, its Yang Guos self-invented palm techniques. As much as Id like to think you all recognise the name, for those who dont, hes main male protagonist of Return of the Condor Heroes.