Why didnt you tell me the truth? said Scarlet. Before we got to Paris?
It wouldnt have mattered. He set the opened cans on the table. You still would have insisted on going after your grandmother. I thought I could plead your case with Jael and convince him that you were useless to usthat he should let you go. But I could only do that if I was still loyal to them.
Scarlet stabbed the artichoke heart again and slipped it into her mouth. She didnt want to go over the what-ifs. She didnt want to linger on all the choices that could have ended with her and her grandmother safely back on the farm. She didnt even know if such choices had existed.
Dropping his gaze, Wolf eased himself onto the bench opposite her, grimacing in pain at each movement. Settled, he picked a tomato from the can and stuffed it into his mouth. His nose crinkled. He looked like he was choking down a worm as he swallowed.
Scarlet pressed her lips against a chuckle. Makes you appreciate my garden tomatoes, doesnt it?
I appreciated everything you gave me. He picked up the can of olives and sniffed at them, wary of being tricked again. Although I didnt deserve any of it.
Scarlet bit her lip. She didnt think he was referring to the produce.
Dipping her head, she dunked her fork into the can of olives Wolf was holding, managing to spear two on its tines.
They ate in silence, Wolf discovering he liked the olives and suffering through two more soppy tomatoes before Scarlet offered him an artichoke. The combination of the two, they discovered, bordered on acceptable.
Some bread would be nice, Scarlet said, scanning the open shelves behind Wolf that showed mismatched plates and coffee mugs painted with the American Republic insignia.
Im so sorry.
Goose bumps scattering across her arms, she dared to look at him, but he was staring at the can of tomatoes, nearly crunching it in his fists.
I took you away from everything you cared about. And your grandmother
Dont, Wolf. Dont do this. We cant change what happened and you did give me that chip. You did save me from Ran.
He hunched his shoulders. Half his hair was messy and wild and normal, the other half still matted down with dried blood. Jael told me he was going to torture you. He thought it would make your grandmother talk. And I just couldnt
Scarlet shuddered, closing her eyes.
I knew they would kill me when they found out, but He struggled for words, releasing a sharp breath. I think I realized that I would rather die because I betrayed them, than live because I betrayed you.
Scarlet wiped her oily fingers on her jeans.
I was going back for you and your grandmother when I saw you being chased by Ran. My head was so jumbled, I couldnt think straightI honestly dont know if I meant to help you both, or kill you. Then when Ran threw you at that statue, something just His knuckles whitened. He shook his head, spikes of hair flailing. It doesnt matter. I was too late.
You saved me.
You wouldnt have needed saving if it wasnt for me.
Oh? So if you hadnt been chosen to bring me to them or find out what information I had, they would have left me alone? No. If it had been anyone but you, I would be dead now.
Wolf frowned at the table.
And I dont believe for a second you were coming back to kill us. No matter how much control that thaumaturge had over you, it was still you in there. You werent going to hurt me.
Wolf met her gaze, sad and bewildered. I honestly hope we never have to test that theory again. Because you dont know how close I was.
You still fought it.
His face contorted, but she was glad when he didnt argue with her. It shouldnt have been possible to resist him like that. What they did to us to our brains it changed the way we think about things. Anger and violence come so quickly, but other things it shouldnt even be possible. His hand started to move toward hers, but halted halfway. He quickly withdrew, fiddling with the battered tomato label instead.
Well, what if Scarlet listed her head. You said they control when your animal instincts will overpower your own thoughts, right? But fighting and hunting arent the only instincts wolves have. Arent wolves monogamous, for starters? Her cheeks started to burn and she had to look away, scratching her fork into a set of initials. And isnt the alpha male the one whos responsible for protecting everyone? Not only the pack, but his mate too? Dropping the fork, she threw her hands into the air. Im not saying I think you and I areafter justI know we just met and thats but its not out of the question, is it? That your instincts to protect me could be as strong as your instincts to kill?
She held her breath and dared to look up. Wolf was gaping at her openly and for a second he seemed almost mortifiedbut then he grinned, the look warm and bewildered. Scarlet caught a glimpse of his sharp canines, her stomach flipping at the sight of them.
You could be right, he said. That makes some sense. On Luna, were kept so far removed from the rest of the citizenry that theres never any chance of falling in
Scarlet was glad when he started to blush too.
He scratched his ear. Maybe thats it. Maybe Jaels control worked against him, because my instincts were telling me to protect you.
Scarlet attempted a nonchalant smile. There you have it. As long as theres an alpha female nearby, you should be just fine. That shouldnt be hard to find, right?
Wolfs expression iced over and he looked away. His tone became uneasy again. I know you must want nothing to do with me. I dont blame you. Wolf scrunched up his shoulders, and met her with an expression full of regret. But youre the only one, Scarlet. Youll always be the only one.
Her pulse fluttered. Wolf
I know. We met less than a week ago and in that time Ive done nothing but lie and cheat and betray you. I know. But if you give me a chance all I want is to protect you. To be near you. For as long as Im able.
Biting her lip, she reached forward, pulling his fingers away from the can. She found that the label had been shredded beneath his mindless fidgeting. Wolf, are you asking me to be your alpha female?
He hesitated.
Scarlet couldnt help itshe burst into laughter. OhIm sorry. That was mean. I know I shouldnt tease you about this. Still grinning, she made to retract her hand, but he was suddenly gripping it, refusing to relinquish the touch. You just look so scared, like Im going to disappear at any minute. Were stuck on a spaceship, Wolf. Im not going anywhere.
His lips twitched, his nervousness beginning to ease away, though his hand stayed tense over hers.
Alpha female, he murmured. I sort of like that.
Beaming, Scarlet gave a mild shrug. It could grow on me.
Forty-Seven
Cinder lay on her back, staring up into the guts of the Rampions engine. Only her cyborg hand moved, flipping the small, shimmering D-COMM chip up and over her fingers, one by one. She was mesmerized by how the chips odd material caught the lights from the motherboard on the wall and reflected them, sending rubies and emeralds twinkling across all the wires and fans and humming power converters. Mesmerized, but without really seeing them. Her thoughts were stretched between thousands of miles.
Earth. The Eastern Commonwealth. New Beijing and Kai, who was now engaged to Queen Levana. Her stomach turned, and she kept recalling the venom in his voice when hed talked to her about the queen. She tried to imagine what he was going through now. Did he have any other choice? She couldnt be sure. She wanted to say yes, that anythingwar, pestilence, slaverywould be better than choosing Levana as empress, but she didnt know if it was true. She didnt know if hed ever had a choice, or if this decision had always been inevitable.
Her thoughts turned away from Earth, toward Luna. A country she didnt remember, a home shed never known. Queen Levana was no doubt celebrating her victory at this moment, giving no thought to all those lives shed just taken.
Queen Levana. Cinders aunt.
The D-COMM chip click, click, clicked against her fingers.
Cinder? Are you in here?
Her fingers stilled with the chip balanced on her pinkie knuckle. Yeah, Iko. Im here.
Maybe next time were on Earth you can pick up some sensors? I feel like Im eavesdropping having the audio on all the time. Its becoming awkward.
Awkward?
The running lights brightened, reminding Cinder of a blush. She wondered if it was intentional.
Scarlet and Wolf are saying gushy things in the galley, Iko said. Normally I like gushy things, but its different when its real people. I prefer the net dramas.
Unexpectedly, Cinder found herself smiling. Ill do my best to get some sensors next time were on Earth. She resumed her fiddling. The chip flipped, clacked, flipped, rolled. How are you feeling, Iko? Are you getting used to being the auto-control system? Is it getting easier?
Something hummed on the computer panel. The shock has worn off, but it still feels like Im pretending to be much more powerful than I really am, and Im going to let everyone down. Its a lot of responsibility. The yellow running lights brightened by the floor. But I did well in Paris, didnt I?
You were brilliant.
The temperature of the engine room spiked. I was kind of brilliant.
Wed all be dead if it werent for you.
Iko let off an unusually pitchy noise, one that Cinder thought might be a nervous giggle. I guess its not so bad being the ship. You know, so long as you need me.
Cinder smirked. Thats very big of you.
One of the engine fans slowed. That was a joke, wasnt it?
Laughing, Cinder practiced spinning the chip like a top on the tip of her finger. It took a few tries before she got the hang of it and could watch it sparkle and dance without much effort.
How about you? Iko said after a moment. How does it feel to be a real princess?
Cinder flinched. The chip tumbled off her finger and she barely caught it. So far its not nearly as fun as one would imagine. What were you saying about having too much power and responsibility and feeling like youre going to let everyone down? Because that all sounded pretty familiar.
I thought that might be the case.
Are you mad that I didnt tell you?
A long silence followed, tying Cinders stomach in knots.
No, Iko said, finally, and Cinder wished that her lie detector worked on androidsor spaceships. But Im worried. Before, I figured that Queen Levana would tire of searching for us, and eventually wed be able to go home, or at least go back to Earth and live normal lives again. But thats never going to happen, is it?
Cinder gulped and started flipping the chip over her fingers again. I dont think so.
Click, click, click.
She exhaled a long breath and flipped the chip one last time, clutching it in her fist.
Levanas going to murder Kai after theyre married. Shell be coronated as empress, and then shell kill him, and shell have the entire Commonwealth under her control. After that, it will only be a matter of time before she invades the rest of the Union. She swept her hair off her forehead. At least, thats what this girl told me. The queens programmer.
She loosened her grip, suddenly afraid that her metal fist would crush the chip while she was distracted.
But I like Kai.
You and every other girl in the galaxy.
Every girl? Are you finally including yourself in that count?
Cinder bit her lip. She knew Iko was thinking back to all the times Cinder had teased Peony for her hopeless crush on the prince, pretending to be immune to such silliness herself. But that all seemed a long, long time ago. She could hardly remember the girl she was back then.
I just know that I cant let him marry Levana, she said, her voice snagging. I cant let him go through with it.
She held up the chip between her thumb and forefinger. Her new hand still felt too new. So clean, so untarnished. She squinted and let the electric current flow from her spine, warming up her wrist until the hand looked human. Skin and bone.
I concur, said Iko. So what are you going to do?
Cinder gulped and let the glamour change. The flesh of her hand became metal againnot flawless titanium, but plain steel, battered with age, grime caked into the crevices, a little too small, a little too stiff. The cyborg hand shed replaced. The one shed always hiddenusually with heavy, work-stained cotton. Once with silk.
The girl shed been back then. The one shed always tried to keep hidden.
An orange light blinked at the corner of her eye. She ignored it.
Im going to let Wolf train me. Im going to become stronger than she is. She flipped the chip again. It was awkward at first, making sure the fingers in the illusion moved just how they were supposed to, that the joints flexed and moved at the right time. Im going to find Dr. Erland, and hes going to teach me how to win against her. Then Im going to track down the girl who programmed this chip, and shes going to tell me everything she knows about Luna and its security and all the queens secrets.