Loving Maddie from A to Z.

Kelly Jamieson.

Dedication.

Special thanks to Slick Reads who suggested this title in my Sweet Heat Reader Group when I was whining about how I suck at titles! Also thank you to beta reader Michele Harvey-once again your honest and thoughtful feedback helped make this story better. And thanks as always to critique partner Nara Malone who confirmed that Aidan is a real man.

I also want to send out thoughts and prayers to the families of both journalists who are missing, and journalists who have not come home. My heart goes out to all of you. This topic was brewing in the news when I wrote this story and then during edits became tragic real life headlines. Also, thank you to those intrepid reporters who bring us such important stories from around the world.

Chapter One.

Maddie eyed the black leather tails of the flogger Aidan held, imagining how they would feel slapping her skin. She fingered the soft tails, met her boyfriend's eyes and smiled, her insides quivering. "Wow. Are we getting kinky?"

He smiled back at her.

After knowing each other nine years, six of those as a couple, she still thought he was so handsome, with his short dark hair brushed back off his face and neat sideburns. His brown eyes regarded her warmly, the corners crinkled up, his full lips curved in a sexy smile. "You said you wanted to spice things up."

She nodded. "Yes. I did." She'd broached that subject a few days ago, a little diffidently, not even sure what she really wanted. She just knew that she'd been so...restless. She didn't want to say dissatisfied, because that wasn't true. She loved Aidan, and she loved having sex with him. In no way was it terrible. It was intimate, and lovely. He was generous and thoughtful, strong and physical. She worried that it was her, that there was something lacking in her, and that was why she felt something missing. So when she'd mentioned spicing things up a little, she'd been worried that he'd be hurt. His male ego bruised. But now she was relieved he was open to that.

He'd brought home a flogger. Wow.

"Maybe just a spanking would have been enough." She eyed the tool again.

Aidan chuckled and touched his lips to hers. "When do we get to try it out?"

Excitement curled in her belly. "How about now?"

"Let's go."

They left the dishes on the counter, having just finished eating dinner, and sprinted out of the kitchen and down the hall to their bedroom. Maddie jumped onto the bed and watched Aidan pull his T-shirt off over his head and toss it aside.

Her breath hitched at seeing his naked torso, another thing she still appreciated even after their years together. He exercised often and with a fierce intensity, running five miles almost every day and pumping massive weights in the gym his company thoughtfully provided their employees. His career involved crazy long hours, especially since starting his own architectural cooperative, but he managed to make working out a priority. It kept his body lean and hard, with ripped abs and heavily muscled arms and shoulders.

He stepped out of the worn jeans he'd changed into when he got home, revealing equally muscled legs, lightly dusted with dark hair. His cock was hard, surrounded by a thick patch of dark hair. Maddie's nipples tingled and her pussy squeezed.

She fell to her back and lifted her hips to push off her fleece shorts and panties, then sat up and pulled off her own thin T-shirt. She unhooked her bra and dropped it to the floor, then rolled to her stomach, wriggling into a comfortable position.

Her nerve endings tingled with anticipation, waiting for the touch of the flogger on her skin. Would he tease her with feathery strokes? Or get right into the slapping? Did he even know what he was doing with it? He wouldn't hurt her, would he? Actually...she hoped to feel a sting. A little burn.

After several seconds, nothing had happened and she lifted her head to look at Aidan.

He stood next to the bed, gazing at her. She couldn't read the expression on his face. "What? What's wrong?"

"You want me to flog you?"

She blinked. "Uh...yeah. Isn't that why you bought it?"

He gave a short nod. "Yeah. I mean, I was kinda hoping you'd use it on me too."

"Oh! I can do that. I guess." She rolled to her side and drew her bottom lip between her teeth. "I don't exactly know what to do, but I can try."

"I don't know what I'm doing either," he admitted. Then he flashed an evil grin. "But we'll figure it out." He reached for the flogger.

She loved it. She had to direct him a couple of times, gently, to not hit too many times in the same place. After that, he carefully laid the tails in different places, warming her ass and the back of her thighs. She asked him to go a little harder. But she felt he was holding back, as if he was afraid to hurt her. Her only complaint about the experience was that she wanted more-more sensation. It was a teaser.

But it was a start.

Using the flogger on Aidan wasn't as much fun. She did it, because he wanted to try it. It surprised her that he wanted it. But she held back at least as much as he had, not wanting to hurt him, not sure what she was doing. Then she tossed it aside, lay down beside him and looked at him.

They both started laughing.

"Yeah, that was weird. C'mere." Aidan pulled her closer and kissed her. He slid his tongue inside her mouth, his body hot and hard and heavy on hers. His hands pushed into her hair and held her head, tilting it to deepen the kiss. After long moments of hot making out, he eased her thighs apart with his and fit himself between them, his cock solid and pulsing against her.

"Yes," she whispered when he dragged his mouth off hers and kissed her jaw, her neck. "Fuck me."

"Did you like it?" He opened his mouth on her throat. "The flogger."

"Yeah. It made me hot." It wasn't a lie. It had been exciting. The heat that had built under her skin made her wet and achy. She wanted him inside her, fucking her hard.

And then he was, pushing into her, filling her with thick heat, her body tightening around him. His fingers tangled in her hair and tingles cascaded down her spine, coalescing at the base of her spine in a hard ache. She lifted her hips to meet his strokes. "I love you."

"Mmm. Love you too. Love your tight pussy squeezing me. So fucking hot." He slid out and thrust back in, deeper, pushing her breath out of her lungs.

Heat spiraled low inside her, growing, building. Then he pulled out and went onto his knees. She struggled to open her eyes, swiping her tongue over her bottom lip.

"Wanna fuck you from behind." He reached for her and easily flipped her. "Wanna see that pretty pink ass."

"Oh." She sighed as he arranged her into position, wriggling a hand down under her to find her clit. She closed her eyes and focused on building her orgasm again. She was buzzing, but she needed more, needed to rub herself. Her clit pulsed with need.

Aidan's big hands gripped her hips as he pushed back into her, this angle deeper, hitting more sensitive spots, intensifying her pleasure. One of his hands slid up her back, gripped her hair and tugged. "Oh I love that." She gasped, her head going back. "Yes, yes, do that." She'd told him how much she liked her hair pulled, but he rarely did it.

More. She wanted more. The words swirled through her head as she rubbed her clit and Aidan's stiff cock tunneled in and out of her with sweet friction. She didn't know what she wanted; all she could think was...more.

Aidan groaned, releasing her hair. Dammit. But he palmed her butt cheek. "Sweet little ass," he ground out. "Love your ass, Maddie." He thrust harder, smacking his lower belly against her ass, and the sensation twisting up inside her shot up sharply, rocketing her up and over the edge in a hard, shuddering orgasm.

When she dragged her hand out from under herself, Aidan pounded harder, faster, and she loved it, her orgasm stretching out in delicious, soft waves.

"Fuck yeah." He groaned, hands on her hips, holding her tight against him as he pulsed inside her. Heat flooded her pussy. "Maddie, baby, love you."

"Mmm." She couldn't form words yet, her body limp and languid.

Aidan curled over her, kissed her shoulder, her hair, the middle of her back. Then he slowly withdrew and rolled to his back beside her. She stretched out her weak legs and dropped an arm across Aidan's abdomen. He curved a palm over her butt. They lay like that for long moments, breathing gradually slowing and easing.

"Wow," Aidan finally said. "That was hot."

"Hot. Yeah." She let out a long slow exhalation, her mouth curving into a smile against the pillow.

Moments later, the bed shifted as Aidan left. She heard water running in their bathroom and then he returned with a warm wash cloth that he used to clean her up. He always took such good care of her.

Then they snuggled under the duvet and Aidan flicked on the TV mounted on the wall across the room. He started channel surfing and she wrapped her arm around him, her head on his shoulder, not paying much attention. He could find something he wanted to watch.

He'd wanted her to use the flogger on him. What did that mean? That she wasn't the only one who'd been feeling less than satisfied? The idea that Aidan found their sex life lacking made worry curl inside her. Sure, she'd been feeling that way a bit, but she still loved him. She didn't want to lose him.

But as he clicked through various channels, two words pierced her thoughts: Zack Donovan.

Her eyes flew open and her body tensed. She lifted her head. "Did you hear that? What was that?"

"Zack. Hang on." He'd already gone past the channel. In seconds, he'd found the news channel that was talking about two journalists missing in Syria, one American, one British.

She scrambled to sit up, shoving the duvet away, staring at the TV in wide-eyed horror. "No." She covered her mouth with her hands. "It can't be."

Aidan's hand landed on her back and rubbed gently. "Maybe he's just there covering the story."

She swallowed, ears acutely tuned to the news story. Her entire body vibrated. She turned to look at Aidan, biting her lip. He lifted one shoulder and they continued to listen.

Then their worst fears were confirmed. Their best friend had been missing in Syria for over two weeks.

"Oh my god!" Her body started to shake, her stomach tightened and she pressed her hands to her cheeks. "Oh my god, Aidan, this can't be happening."

Aidan was silent, watching and listening. But they'd missed the first part of the story and the news anchor went on to another one. "Shit."

Zack. Oh no. Oh god no.

They hadn't seen him in years. He'd left Chicago seven years ago to pursue his photojournalism career, right after he and Aidan had graduated from college. Zack hadn't been great about staying in touch over the years. In fact, he'd never even been home once, despite Maddie's emailed pleas to come home and see them. He'd emailed back, infrequently, always with some job or trip that kept him away at Christmas, or any time really. Seven long years since she and Aidan had seen their best friend.

And now...god. Her throat tightened again. Were they ever going to see him again?

"I'll go look on the Internet." She flung back the covers and jumped off the bed. She grabbed the robe she'd left lying over the arm of a chair and fumbled into it with shaky hands, then sprinted out to their shared home office. Her laptop sat open on the desk at her end of the room, and she dropped into the chair and tapped the keyboard.

The monitor lit up and she bit her lip as she clumsily typed out a search.

She sensed Aidan behind her and glanced over her shoulder to see him walking toward her in a pair of boxers. He rested his warm, strong hands on her shoulders.

Zack had apparently entered Syria from Lebanon on June fifth, had traveled to Damascus and then had been going on to al-Qusair. There'd been intense fighting in that area as regime forces supported by Lebanese Hezbollah fighters were trying to capture the rebel stronghold. Zack had last contacted his employer, Stockton News Agency, on April 30, and hadn't been heard from since. Over two weeks ago.

"He emailed me on April twenty-ninth." Maddie turned again to Aidan. His face had tightened into lines of stark concern. "I was asking him to try to come home this summer. For your thirtieth birthday."

"Fuck." Aidan stared at the monitor.

Zack had been all over the world, to some of the most violent places-he'd left Chicago to go to Iran, had moved on to Afghanistan, Pakistan, then Middle Eastern countries. She'd almost been relieved the time he'd traveled to Australia, such a nice, calm place, except that he'd been there covering terrible wildfires that had been almost as scary as warfare.

Why he kept risking his life covering these tragic new stories she wasn't sure she'd ever understand. In fact, it made her a little angry at him at times. And then he won awards for his photographs, including last year's Pulitzer. And she knew he was doing something important. At those moments, she was filled with pride and admiration and knew all she could do was keep in touch as best she could and support him in his career.

She stared back at the computer, scrolling down, then doing another Google search, but there wasn't much more information to be found. "I feel so helpless." Tears stung her eyes. "What can we do?"

"I don't know." Aidan's voice came out rough.

"We have to do something!" She turned anguished eyes on him. "How can we just sit here and...and..."

"I know. I know." He massaged her shoulders. "I don't know what right now, but I'll figure it out."

She nodded, pressing her trembling lips together. Aidan would fix it. Aidan could fix anything. She couldn't stop the tear that dripped from her eye and she swiped at it. The immense frustration and anger swelled up inside her, a feeling of red hot pressure.

"He has no family," she reminded Aidan. Zack had never talked a lot about his childhood but Maddie and Aidan knew it had been tough.

"I know." Aidan rubbed his chin. "Well, the first thing to do is contact the company he works for. They have to be working on this."

"Yes. Yes, good idea." She scrubbed at her stinging eyes.

Aidan crossed to his own computer on the other desk in the den and sat. In moments he'd located a contact name and email and had sent a message.

He turned to Maddie. "There. Don't worry, sweetheart. Tomorrow I'll make some calls."

"Oh, Aidan." She slid onto his lap and his arms came around her. His strength and warmth surround her, and she pressed her face to the side of his neck. "I knew something like this was going to happen. He keeps putting himself in danger...sooner or later it was going to catch up to him."

"He's strong." Aidan rubbed her back. "He's survived a lot, his whole life. And he's smart."

She drew back to peer up at him. "Why'd you say that? That he's survived a lot?"

Aidan shrugged. "We both know he didn't have the best upbringing."

She searched his eyes. "You know more about that than I do, don't you?"

He just shrugged and looked away. He did know. He and Zack had been friends before she'd met them. Of course he knew. Maddie had her own suspicions, based on comments Zack had made, but she'd never pushed either of them to talk about it.

She sucked briefly on her bottom lip. "I know he's been in some tough situations. And he's made it out alive before. He will this time too."

"That's what we're going to believe." Aidan's arms tightened on her and she was so glad she had him there, rock solid and supportive. "He's going to be okay."

The emailed response the next day from Stockton assured them that they were reaching out to a range of contacts and doing everything they could to facilitate Zack's release. They promised to stay in close contact with any news they had. They issued a press release that praised Zack as a brave and dedicated reporter who believed the civil war in Syria was an important story for the American people to know about, and urged his captors to release him.

Aidan also contacted the State Department, and after persistently explaining that Zack had no other family and they were his closest friends and working his way up several levels, they'd agreed to talk to him. They were sympathetic and supportive but had no concrete information at that point.

As Maddie watched the news coverage over the next days, she learned how the situation inside Syria had gotten so much more complicated and dangerous for journalists since the war had begun, with multiple rebel factions on one side and diverse militias fighting for the government on the other.

A few days later, they learned that Zack and the other journalist had in fact been abducted and were being held by rebel forces, a brigade known as Al Hassaq, apparently, terrifyingly, affiliated with Al Qaeda. But little else was known.

They continued to watch the news and scour newspapers and the Internet for any mention, but after the first few days the story dropped off the media's radar as a top story. She and Aidan went to work every day, him to his architectural firm where he was overseeing a number of huge, high-profile projects, her to her public relations job at The Endicott Foundation. Aidan was under so much pressure at work with the Thorne Studio, and he was being amazing by every day trying to contact someone to find out more information. They kept in touch with Stockton News and the State Department, but Maddie couldn't let it drop. She felt helpless and felt a need to do something. So she started a Facebook page dedicated to bring Zack home.