ERIKA LEIGH PARLAM

I have received a message from Andy around eight in the evening. She wrote that she remembered what's today but she's sorry that it has to be of the same day with her brother's engagement party.

She also wrote that she had prepared a gift but was not able to give it to me. She left it by the counter as she hurriedly went to school early this morning.

'Who is she fooling?'

'Idiot'

So I drove my car to her apartment to get that gift. I was even smiling the entire ride because deep within me, I was expecting a surprise something.

I connected the dots of events today like Andy's cutting of cla.s.ses; maybe she had to do it to prepare something to surprise me.

Also, Donna's reaction awhile back.

Just thinking about it made all the b.u.t.terflies go wild in my stomach. I made a couple of taps on it.

"Hey tummy, sorry for all the b.u.t.terflies lately."

"I swear it's not my fault."

"It's Andy's."

I smiled to myself.

Right, I know her pin, she gave it to me last time so… my heart raised as I reached her apartment.

I opened the door excitedly, my hands were even shaking. I went inside a pitched black room. I stood still for a while, I waited for something like a lighting of a candle or the like but...but nothing happened.

I crest my forehead.

So… so I switched on the light instead and let myself in. I wandered my gaze around... no flowers, no petals on the floor, no balloons in the air and most of all, no Andy in sight.

I sighed in my disappointment.

I made my way to the counter, I even noticed some used utensils on the dining table and some unwashed dishes by the sink.

My frustration just grew by then.

I found a small box by the counter, I picked it up swiftly, went to the living room and sat on the couch.

I opened it.

I smiled.

It was a ring but not designed like those of an engagement ring or a wedding ring; still beautiful though.

I read what's carved inside, it's Andy's name.

I smiled again as I raised my hand beholding the ring in my finger.

It was beautiful but it would mean more if only… if only Andy put it to me herself.

A bitter smile curved my lips.

I wandered my gaze around for the second time, hoping that she would just be somewhere hiding but I hoped for naught; not even a shadow was there.

I felt suddenly sad by then; tears came flowing; my chest tightened and my throat throbbed.

So I laughed between my sobs.

I was an idiot really.

I was hurting through my own expectation.

I have that perfect picture in my mind of how things supposed to happen but I end up being disappointed.

'Silly me'

I hate myself for being so excited for something but end up not happening.

I was an idiot.

I don't blame Andy though.

I blame myself for expecting too much from her.

'Ugh…'

'So silly of me'

Well, I don't know. I drifted to sleep in there.

'Poor me'