Lover's Vows - Part 5
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Part 5

BARON. Are not you a little embarra.s.sed?

AMELIA. No.

BARON. Don't you wish sometimes to speak to him, and have not the courage to begin?

AMELIA. No.

BARON. Do not you wish to take his part when his companions laugh at him?

AMELIA. No--I love to laugh at him myself.

BARON. Provoking! Aside.] Are not you afraid of him when he comes near you?

AMELIA. No, not at all.--Oh yes--once. [recollecting herself.]

BARON. Ah! Now it comes!

AMELIA. Once at a ball he trod on my foot; and I was so afraid he should tread on me again.

BARON. You put me out of patience. Hear, Amelia! [stops short, and speaks softer. To see you happy is my wish. But matrimony, without concord, is like a duetto badly performed; for that reason, nature, the great composer of all harmony, has ordained, that, when bodies are allied, hearts should be in perfect unison. However, I will send Mr.

Anhalt to you ----

AMELIA [much pleased]. Do, papa.

BARON. --He shall explain to you my sentiments. [Rings.] A clergyman can do this better than----[Enter servant.] Go directly to Mr. Anhalt, tell him that I shall be glad to see him for a quarter of an hour if he is not engaged. [Exit servant.

AMELIA [calls after him]. Wish him a good morning from me.

BARON [looking at his watch]. The Count is a tedious time dressing.--Have you breakfasted, Amelia?

AMELIA. No, papa. [they sit down to breakfast.]

BARON. How is the weather? Have you walked this morning?

AMELIA. Oh, yes--I was in the garden at five o'clock; it is very fine.

BARON. Then I'll go out shooting. I do not know in what other way to amuse my guest.

Enter Count Ca.s.sEL.

COUNT. Ah, my dear Colonel! Miss Wildenhaim, I kiss your hand.

BARON. Good morning! Good morning! though it is late in the day, Count. In the country we should rise earlier.

[Amelia offers the Count a Cup of tea.]

COUNT. Is it Hebe herself, or Venus, or ----

AMELIA. Ha, ha, ha! Who can help laughing at his nonsense?

BARON [rather angry]. Neither Venus, nor Hebe; but Amelia Wildenhaim, if you please.

COUNT [Sitting down to breakfast]. You are beautiful, Miss Wildenhaim.--Upon my honour, I think so. I have travelled, and seen much of the world, and yet I can positively admire you.

COUNT. Wherefore?

AMELIA. Because I might then, perhaps, admire you.

COUNT. True;--for I am an epitome of the world. In my travels I learnt delicacy in Italy--hauteur, in Spain--in France, enterprize--in Russia, prudence--in England, sincerity--in Scotland, frugality--and in the wilds of America, I learnt love.

AMELIA. Is there any country where love is taught?

COUNT. In all barbarous countries. But the whole system is exploded in places that are civilized.

AMELIA. And what is subst.i.tuted in its stead?

COUNT. Intrigue.

AMELIA. What a poor, uncomfortable subst.i.tute!

COUNT. There are other things--Song, dance, the opera, and war.

[Since the entrance of the Count the Baron has removed to a table at a little distance.

BARON. What are you talking of there?

COUNT. Of war, Colonel.

BARON [rising]. Ay, we like to talk on what we don't understand.

COUNT [rising]. Therefore, to a lady, I always speak of politics; and to her father, on love.

BARON. I believe, Count, notwithstanding your sneer, I am still as much a proficient in that art as yourself.

COUNT. I do not doubt it, my dear Colonel, for you are a soldier: and since the days of Alexander, whoever conquers men is certain to overcome women.

BARON. An achievement to animate a poltroon.

COUNT. And, I verily believe, gains more recruits than the king's pay.

BARON. Now we are on the subject of arms, should you like to go out a shooting with me for an hour before dinner?

COUNT. Bravo, Colonel! A charming thought! This will give me an opportunity to use my elegant gun: the but is inlaid with mother-of-pearl. You cannot find better work, or better taste.--Even my coat of arms is engraved.

BARON. But can you shoot?

COUNT. That I have never tried--except, with my eyes, at a fine woman.

BARON. I am not particular what game I pursue.--I have an old gun; it does not look fine; But I can always bring down my bird.