Love In The Suds: A Town Eclogue - Part 2
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Part 2

A fable Sodom's fate: in Heav'n above All is made up of harmony and love; That such its vengeance I believe not, I; Historians err and Hebrew Jews will lie.

Sing then, my Muse, a more engaging strain To lure my NYKY back to Drury-lane.

Tell him the fancied danger all is o'er; Home he may come and love as heretofore.

IMITATIONS.

Formosum pastor Corydon ardebat Alexin.

---- Deos didici securum agere aevum Nec si quid miri faciat natura, deos id Tristes ex alto coeli demittere tecto.

---- ---- Credat Judaeus Apella, Non ego. ---- Ducite ab urbe domum mea carmina ducite Daphnim.

In vain the vulgar shall for vengeance call, Or move the justices at Hickes's-hall; In vain grand juries shall be urg'd by law In his indictment not to leave a flaw.

Ev'n at the bar should NYKY stand arraign'd, No verdict 'gainst him should be there obtain'd; Nay, by the laws and customs of the land, Tho' trembling NYKY should convicted stand, The candid jury shall be mov'd t'acquit A gentleman, an author, and a wit: For liberal minds with candour ever see The milder failings of humanity!

Smooth-spoken MANSFIELD,[10] with his vacant face, In softening accents first shall ope his case; Which to defend, the want of Merlin's cunning Shall be supplied by that of Grimbald DUNNING.[11]

E'en at th' Old-Bailey they for NYK shall plead; Where would they not, if they were largely fee'd?

Were NYKY summon'd to the bar below, Well-fee'd these faithful barristers would go;

NOTES.

[10] Not the Judge of that name; but the barrister, who, is by no means a judge---- of any thing.

[11] See King Arthur, lately revived at Drury-lane Theatre, and attend the pleadings in our courts of law and equity at Westminster, Guildhall, and Lincoln's-inn.

Their tale to Minos would they glibly tell; Minos the MANSFIELD, or Chief Judge, of h.e.l.l.[12]

Nor need my NYKY fear a London jury Will e'er be influenced with a female fury.

Can they who let a prov'd a.s.sa.s.sin 'scape Hang up poor NYKY for a friendly rape?

If in the dark to stab, be thought no crime, What may'nt be hop'd from jurymen in time?

Soon Southern modes, no doubt, they'll reconcile With the plain manners of our Northern isle; And e'en new-married citizens be brought To reckon S----y a venial fault: When if GEORGE BELLAS,[13] cruel and unkind, Blast not their loves, with rude tempestuous wind, In common-council Corydon may burn, And Corydons for Corydon in turn, Till every alderman about the chair Find his Alexis in a new lord-mayor.

IMITATIONS.

Ex illo Corydon, Corydon est tempore n.o.bis.

NOTES.

[12] Minos is reported by the poets to have been raised to this high office for his impartiality in the administration of Justice here on earth: what a pity that office is not soon to become vacant; as it might be most luckily filled by as worthy a successor.

[13] A boisterous mock-patriot, supposed to be descended from Eolus and Amphitrite, being famous for his mackarel expeditions, his musical knowledge of the fundamental base and public performances on the ba.s.soon.

Sing then, O Muse, a more pathetic strain, To lure my gentle NYKY back again.

For, sure as Thames resembles Tyber's tide, Shall Macaronis soon possess Cheapside; As petty-jury-men in judgment sit, And ev'ry Corydon, with NYK, acquit.

Yes by this knife, this useful[14] knife, I swear, Which for my lov'd B----TTI's sake I wear; This knife, whose haft, at Stratford Jubilee, For ever left its parent mulberry tree; For thence it grew, tho', tipt with steel so fine, It now will serve to stab with, or to dine; That tree, which late on Avon's border grew; By Shakespeare planted; Warwick lads say true;

IMITATIONS.

Ducite ab urbe domum mea carmina ducite Daphnim.

All' ek toi ereo, kai epi megan horkon omoumai, Nai ma tode skeptron, to men oupote phylla kai ozous Physei, epeide prota tomen en oressi leloipen, Oud' anathelesei.

HOM.

Ut sceptrum hoc (sceptrum dextra nam forte gerebat) Nunquam fronde levi fundet virgulta nec umbras; c.u.m semel in sylvis imo de stirpe recisum, Matre caret posuitque comas et brachia ferro Olim arbos, nunc artificis ma.n.u.s aere decoro.

Inclusit patribusque dedit gestare Latinis.

VIRG.

NOTES.

[14] See the utility of this knife in a late Sessions-paper.

By this most precious relick, here I pledge Myself to save him from the halter's edge: And not myself alone, but ev'ry friend Shall all his interest and a.s.sistance lend.

Quaint B----, beholding the rude mob with scorn, Shall tell how Irish bards are gentle born; Next I, to captivate the learned bench, Will strait affirm that NYKY writes good French;[15]

Thy timid nature JOHNSON shall maintain,[16]

In words no dictionary can explain.

Goldsmith, good-natur'd man, shall next defend, His foster-brother,[17] countryman, and friend: Shall prove the humbler pa.s.sions, now and then, Are incidental to us little men;

IMITATIONS.

Hanc ego magnanimi spolium Didymaonis hastam, Ut semel est avulsa jugis a matre perempta, Quae neque jam frondes virides neque proferet umbras, Fida ministeria et duras obit horrida pugnas Testor.

VAL. FLAC.

NOTES.

[15] See the Sessions-paper; in which this admirable plea is made use of by ROSCIUS to exculpate a culprit accused of murder.

[16] See the same; in which this pompous pseudo-philosopher affects to suppose cowardice incompatible with the character of an Italian bravo.

[17] So called from having not long since made one in a poetical triumvirate, which gave occasion to the following verses in imitation of Dryden's famous epigram on Milton;

"Three poets in three distant ages born," &c.

And that the part our gentle NYKY play'd Was but philosophy in masquerade.[18]

Let me no longer, then, my loss deplore, But to his ROSCIUS, Muse, my NYK restore.

IMITATIONS.

Ducite ab urbe domum mea carmina ducite Daphnim.