"You found him! Where? Have you seen him?"

"No, not yet. In the end it was so easy. I could have found him years ago. I don't want to think about that."

"I was sure he was hiding in some cave in India. I never thought we'd find him. Well, where is he?"

"He's in Qal'at al-Maraya."

"Really!"

"Yes. He doesn't know I've found him. And I haven't told anyone. I have to see him first, before I let anyone know."

"How did you find out, after all this time?"

"The army knew all along. Someone high up gave it to me."

"That simple ...Poor Dana, after all your efforts. Crazy. Qal'at al-Maraya. What was he thinking?"

"I'm going to ask Ella to help me get to him."

"Good idea."

"I should let you get back to Volvo."

"He's fine. Are you?"

"Of course! I've never been happier in my life-I don't know how I'll survive until I see him."

"He's not going to be exactly the same, honey."

"I know. But he's still Daniel."

"Yes, but people change. You have to be prepared for that. People go through things, their lives change, they're not the same people. Look at me. Twenty years ago I was wandering from party to party like some lost minstrel, stoned out of my mind most of the time. Now I'm a member of the bourgeoisie, and I spend my days worrying about my credit rating."

"The basic things stay the same."

"Well, it's true I've always been gay! By the way, our friend Volvo has just decided he's gay, too."

"Oh yes, he mentioned something. Well ...I guess it's possible."

"He wants me to take him to a gay bar."

"That's great news! Finally, a sign of life. Who knows, he might meet someone."

"For sure he'll meet someone. He's quite good-looking. Dana, be careful. I'm not happy about you wandering around Qal'at al-Maraya."

"I'll go with Ella, everyone knows her.'

"That's a good idea, angel. Though you know, our marvelous army shot at Ella's car a few months ago. It was a miracle she wasn't killed."

"Yes, I remember."

He shook his head. "Poor Daniel. Living in what is at the moment one of the planet's hellholes."

"Some parts of Qal'at al-Maraya are really beautiful-it's not like he's living in a refugee camp. But I guess it's bad everywhere on the strip now."

"Good luck, sweetie. Call me if you need anything."

He let himself out, and I stayed on the sofa, motionless, all my emotions on hold.

I was still sitting on the sofa and staring into space when Rafi came over. He brought food: spices in glass jars, vegetables, an interesting assortment of grains. I watched him as he took the items out of plastic bags. We didn't touch; we were both shy today.

"So, where is he?" Rafi asked. "And can I get a cup of coffee around here?"

"Yes, of course. He's in Qal'at al-Maraya."

"Qal'at al-Maraya! Well, that's interesting."

"Yes."

"I wonder how he managed to keep that a secret. Everyone knows everything in this country. Especially something like that."

"I'm so angry at the army. They knew all along."

"Maybe the people you spoke to didn't know." He lit a cigarette; he seemed very tense.

"I had no help at all. No one wanted to help me find him, not his family, not my friends, no one. Certainly no one in any of the offices I went to. I didn't know who to turn to."

"People think they know what's best for us."

"Why? Why would that be best for me?"

"I don't know. Maybe they thought he'd gone mad. Maybe they didn't want you to go running after him and move there also."

"Why would it be classified information, though? I just don't understand."

"Maybe it isn't classified, just not easily available."

"I'm thinking back to that woman, that woman who spent a lot of time trying to look Daniel up on her computer, just because she was on my side, you know. She probably wasn't even supposed to be going in, but she was alone in the office, and she began checking all sorts of things. She found out that he was in Qal'at al-Maraya. And she just decided not to tell me. Or else she was afraid of getting into trouble. I remember now that when she was reading the screen a weird look came over her face. What right does she have to ruin my life? What right do they have to keep that sort of information from me?"

"What will you do now?"

"He has to see that I still love him. He must be so lonely there."

"You don't know, Dana. You don't know what his life is like. Maybe he's found a way to be happy. Maybe he's made some close friends. I wonder how he managed to get in, though. How he got them to trust him, I can't imagine it."

"Yes, it was right in the middle of the uprising."

"You're right ... eleven years ago ... It seems impossible. They would never have trusted him, a former soldier, wounded, I wonder how he did it."

"You're very tense, Rafi."

"That's the first time you've used my name."

"Really?"

"Really."

"I can't believe that. I'm sorry. Rafi. Rafi. I'm sorry."

"I forgive you."

"Are you upset?"

"Let's put on some music." He went over to my CD collection and put on a record that had just come out, various artists singing Jacky's greatest hits. The clear pure voice of one of my favorite female vocalists filled the room. A carnival of fools, showgirls on the shore, shrapnel in the air, sand on the floor. Come dance with me, dance with me, for the sake of the dream, and we'll both pretend that we can be seen.

"I have to tell my father," I said. "I have to call him. What time is it in Belgium?"

"I think they're around three or four hours back, I'm not sure."

"I'm calling, I can't wait."

It took me a few minutes to find my father's number; I almost never phoned him. He sounded groggy when he answered.

"Dad? It's me."

"What's happened?" he asked, immediately worried.

"Nothing, nothing, it's good news."

"Ah, the kind I like. Hold on, hold on. Just a second, I can't hear without my glasses. Ah, here ...Yes."

"I found Daniel's address."

There was a long silence at the other end. "Dad, are you there?"

"Yes, yes, I'm just trying to digest what you said. He's alive?"

"Of course he's alive. Didn't you know that?"

"Yes-no-I mean, I had no idea, honey."

"I told you he's alive, the army still sends him his disability checks."

"Ah, that's right. Have you seen him?"

"Of course not! I just got the address now. It was a fluke. He's in Qal'at al-Maraya, that's why I couldn't find him."

"Qal'at al-Maraya! What's he doing there?"

"Hiding, obviously. What a brilliant hiding place."

"Dana, how do you feel about all this?"

"What do you think, Dad? I've only waited eleven years! I'm so excited I can hardly breathe."

"I'm very happy for you, darling. Very, very happy. But how the hell will you get to him?"

"Ella, maybe."

"Do you think you should write to him first?"

"No, no, I won't let him get away this time. How's Gitte?"

"Fine, fine. She says to send her love."

"Say hi from me, too. Tell her the good news."

"I will. Keep me posted. I hope it goes well, duckie. I'm sure it will. This is like one of your romance novels, isn't it?"

"Well, not exactly. But who knows, maybe I'll write one about a long-lost true love. There's a song about that, isn't there? Mummy used to like it."

"Well, if he's in some battle slain," my father began to sing, "I'll lie still when the moon doth wane. If he's drowned in the deep salt sea, I'll be true to his memory. And if he's found another love, and he and his love both married be, I wish them health and happiness, where they dwell across the sea." He stopped singing and coughed. "Bit early in the morning, my voice isn't quite awake."

"Don't stop there! Sing me the end!"

"He picked her up all in his arms, and kisses gave her one, two, three, saying weep no more, my own true love, I am your long-lost John Riley."

"You're right, it's very romantic."

"This really is wonderful news, Dana. Qal'at al-Maraya, Jesus. Please be careful, duckie. Good idea to go down with Ella. Don't try it on your own."

"I couldn't even if I wanted to. Otherwise I'd be in a taxi right now."

"Yes. Well."

"Dad, can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"What did you and Mum do back in South Africa?"

He laughed. "In fifty words or less?"

"I mean, were you in prison? You never really told me."

"Why are you asking now?"

"It came up ... in a conversation. And I realized that I had no idea."