"There's nothing to tell. They went sailing, a storm came, and they got caught in it."

"They had no warning?"

"They were out there too long. He was probably. . ."

"Probably what?" He didn't answer. "Cary?"

"Probably trying to do to her what Adam Jackson tried to do to you tonight. She resisted and he kept her out there and they got caught in the stoi in.

He's responsible for what happened. He's lucky he died too, otherwise, I would have killed him with my bare hands. In fact I wish he hadn't died. I wish I could have been the one to kill him."

I was quiet for a moment. His shoulders, hunched up with rage, relaxed a bit.

"Don't you think that if Robert Royce were that sort of a boy, Laura wouldn't have continued seeing him, Cary?" I asked softly. "I certainly don't want to be alone with Adam Jackson again."

He didn't reply for a while. Then he sighed, lowered his head and shook it. "She was confused, is all. She was in a rush to have a boyfriend."

"Why?"

"Because of those. . . busybodies in school always teasing her about not having one, saying nasty things to her about . . ."

"About what?" I held my breath.

"About us. They spread dirty stories about us and she thought it was because she didn't have a boyfriend. So you see, she didn't really like Robert that much. She was just trying to please everyone and get them to stop. She thought it was bothering me and she blamed herself."

"That's terrible," I said. He nodded. "Why did they make up those stories about you two?"

"Why? Because they're dirty, mean, selfish.

They couldn't understand why Laura and I were so close, why we did so much together and for each other. They were jealous so they made up stories.

They're as responsible for her death as Robert was,"

he concluded.

"I'm sorry, Cary." I touched his shoulder.

He nodded. "Don't bother reading any more of those phony letters. They're full of lies. He wrote and said whatever he thought would get him what he wanted," Cary assured me.

"Why doesn't your mother throw them out, then?"

"She wouldn't touch anything in that room. For a long time afterward, she refused to believe Laura wasn't coming back. They've never found her body, so she refused to accept her death. And then, my father had the gravestone put in and forced her to go there with him. Finally, she accepted that much, but she still clings to the room, to her things, her clothes. I was surprised she wanted to take you in and let you stay in Laura's room, but it's almost as if she thinks . . ."

"What?"

"Laura's come back through you. That's another reason why my father hasn't been the most hospitable person. It's not that he dislikes you for any reason."

"There's a reason," I said prophetically.

"Something happened that has made him so bitter about my mother, and I want to know what it was. Do you know anything else?" I asked.

"No," he said quickly. Too quickly, I thought.

"Then, I'll just have to ask our grandparents to tell me everything."

He turned, a look of disbelief on his face.

"You wouldn't just come out and ask them?"

"Why not?"

"Grandma Olivia can be. . . tough."

"So can I," I said firmly. "When I have to be."

He laughed.

"Maybe you shouldn't, Melody," he said after a moment, his smile gone. "Maybe some things are better left below deck."

"Secrets fester like infections. After a while they make you deathly sick, Cary. That's the way I feel. It's the way you felt when people were making up stories about you and Laura," I said searching for a way to make him understand how important it was to me.

"I tell you what," he said, reaching for my hand.

"I'll make you a promise. I promise to try to find out as much as I can about your parents, too."

"Will you? Oh thank you, Cary."

He held on to my hand. "It's okay," he said.

"You're probably right. You probably should know everything there is to know about the Logan family."

I smiled at him. "When I first came here, I thought you hated me."

"I did," he confessed. "I knew why my mother wanted you here and I felt bad about it, but. . ."

"But?"

"You're very nice," he said. "And the only cousin I have, so I have to put up with you."

"Thanks a lot."

"Let's check the dress," he said and got up. "It's not completely dry, but it's dry enough. You'll get by with it."

"Thanks," I said rising. He handed me the dress and I started to take off the raincoat.

"I'll wait outside," he said.

I changed, hung up the raincoat, and joined him on the deck.

"How do you feel?" he asked.

"Tired and wobbly, but a hundred percent better than I did, thanks to you."

"Let's go home," he said taking my hand. He didn't let go until we were at the house.

"How do I look?" I asked him, brushing back my hair.

"Fine," he said gazing at me in the glow of the porch light.

Uncle Jacob was in the hallway when we entered. He was heading for the living room with a mug of tea in his hand. He paused and looked at us, his eyes growing small and dark.

"Where were you two?" he asked.

"I met Melody coming back from studying with her friend," Cary said quickly.

Uncle Jacob's gaze shifted from Cary to me and then back to Cary before he continued toward the living room.

"Get home as soon as you can tomorrow," he said. "Lots to do."

"Okay," Cary said.

Aunt Sara appeared in the kitchen doorway.

"Oh, hi. Is everything all right?"

"Yes, Aunt Sara," I said. "I'm tired and going to sleep."

"Good night, dear," she said.

Cary followed me up the stairs.

"I'm sorry you had to tell your father a lie, Cary," I told him at my door.

"It was only half a lie," he said. "You were on the way home." He smiled.

"Good night and thanks again," I said. I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. He blushed. I flashed the best smile I could and retreated to my room. He was still standing in the hallway when I closed the door. I heard him pull down his attic steps and go upstairs.

I changed and dressed for bed. I hated the sight of myself in the mirror and wondered if those shadows under my eyes would be gone by morning.

Nothing felt as good as the mattress and covers. My eyelids were like two steel doors slamming shut. The last thing I remembered was wishing Cary hadn't lied for me. It all starts with little half lies and then it grows until, until.. . you become like Mommy and lose track of the difference.

It won't happen to me, I vowed.

It won't.

The chant worked like a lullaby. The next thing I knew, I was fluttering my eyelids at the flood of sunlight penetrating the window curtains and nudging me to start another day.

14.

A Helpless Creature .

Unfortunately, Cary wasn't right about Adam Jackson. It was true that his ego had been bruised, but his embarrassment over my rejecting him turned into something uglier. By the time Cary and I had arrived at school, Adam's lies had spread like a brush fire in a drought. The moment I saw the expressions on the faces of girls like Lorraine, Janet, and Betty, I knew something mean and vicious had been poured into their ears and would soon be poured into mine.

As soon as we entered the building, Cary sensed the negative electricity in the air. He hovered about me like a nervous grizzly bear. Usually, when we arrived at school, he would scamper away to join his few friends, but today Cary lingered at my side while I organized my things at my locker. Nearby, the girls watched us, giggling. Other boys walking by held smirks on their faces and twisted their lips as they whispered. I marveled at how completely Cary could ignore everyone when he wanted to. For him, they didn't exist at the moment. He heard no evil and saw no evil. If he looked in their direction, he gazed right through them.

"Good morning, Cary," Betty said as she passed us with Lorraine and Janet.

"Good morning, Cary," Lorraine echoed.

"Good morning, Cary," Janet mimicked.

Something slippery and ugly obviously was hidden beneath their wide smiles. Cary didn't respond.

He escorted me to my homeroom and was there at the sound of the bell to walk with me to my next class.

"You don't have to be worried about me," I told Cary after I found him waiting in the hallway outside my first period classroom.

"Oh, I'm. . . not," he fumbled. "I was just nearby and thought I might as well walk along with you as with anyone."

"Thanks a lot," I said, smiling at his clumsy effort to explain his presence.

"I mean, I like walking with you, it's just that- ".

"You're usually too busy?"

"Yes," he said, grateful for my suggestion.

Although he wasn't there after my next period ended, he wasn't far behind in the corridor. It was nice having him look after me. For the moment at least, I felt as if I had a brother.

In my classes and in the hallway when I passed from room to room, I noticed how the girls kept their distance, and in class, I saw them looking at me and passing notes. But no one said anything. When I entered the cafeteria at lunch time, however, I found Janet, Lorraine, and Betty waiting anxiously, their eyes sparkling with glee.

"You're kind of cozy with Grandpa today,"

Betty teased immediately. "Any special reason?" She swung her eyes toward her friends.

"Cozy? I don't know what you mean," I replied.

I stepped toward the counter to get a container of milk, but I caught the way they traded smiles and glances as they moved behind me in the lunch line.

"We heard you've taken Laura's place in more ways than one," Janet whispered in my ear. It made the hairs on my neck stick up.

"What?" I turned to confront them.