Now the thoughts blow and whirl through my brain like falling leaves that are driven by the wind. What a comparison, eh?

The mornings are magnificent now and so are the evenings, but in the middle of the day I should like to do nothing but lie in the water, if that were not so warm. We enjoy the mornings so much, nature is then splendidly fresh and beautiful. We wander around the garden where everything is blooming and fragrant. It is truly a pleasure to be out of doors in the morning. If you could only wander around with us; or do you not care for flowers and plants? Mother has her vegetable garden, and we our flower and rose garden; this last is next to our room, and when there is a full moon it is so idyllic out there. The sisters bring their guitars and sit under the flowering shrubs and make music. After the concert, we sit idly, sometimes chattering and laughing.

Your indignation over the treatment which my two educated and enlightened fellow countrymen had to endure, did me good. But believe me, they are not all stupid men who conduct themselves so scornfully toward the Javanese. I have met persons who are far from stupid, who even belong to the aristocracy of the mind, but are so haughty and over-bearing that they do not like to be in the same house with me.

Too often we are made to feel that we Javanese are not really human beings at all. How do the Netherlanders expect to be loved by us when they treat us so? Love begets love, but scorn never yet aroused affection. We have many friends among the Hollanders whom we love dearly, even more than we do friends of our own race. They have taken the trouble to try and understand us, and they have won our love. We shall never forget that we have to thank the Hollanders for the awakening of our minds, for our civilization. They may wrong us, but we will like them because we owe them so much.

People may say of the Javanese what they will, but they can never say with truth that they have not hearts. They have them manifestly and they know how to be grateful for benefits, whether they are of a material or of an intellectual kind, although their immovable countenances change not one jot to betray their inward emotion. But I shall never have to tell you, I am sure, that all creatures of whatever colour, are human beings, just as much as you yourself.

I am happy because I have been able to know you. I shall not let you go, Stella. I love you so much that I do not know what would become of my life, if, as G.o.d forbid, we should ever become separated. As though the wide ocean were not already between us! But spirits among whom there is great sympathy know no distance; they bridge the widest seas and most far-away lands to commune with one another. Letters too are splendid.

Blessed be he who first invented them!

A week ago we had a visit from the Director of Education, Service and Industry, and his wife from Batavia--and Stella, rejoice with me, the Director came here especially to see Father and to ask his advice personally about the erection of the native school for girls which the Government is planning.

I was sick and miserable, not only from bodily pain, but misery of soul.

But Stella, I believed that my dream of freedom was on the point of realization when Father gave me the Director's letter. That letter cured me entirely. It did me such infinite good to know that in Batavia one of the highest officials of the Government had a heart for the Javanese, and for the Javanese woman.

Soon afterwards Mama came to look for me, and she found her daughter in tears; I was so happy, so thankful.

Before he came I had the greatest desire to see him alone, if only for a moment, just to express something of what I felt.

And he came--but not alone--his wife was with him. O Stella, never in our lives have we made such a charming acquaintance! I had already great sympathy for him, because I knew why he was coming; and the sympathy grew, when I saw him ride into our grounds on the front seat of the carriage with his wife on the back seat, and next to her Father who had met them at the station.

I knew that Father would never have sat there without being pressed. You would have seen nothing remarkable in this, and you will laugh at me when I say that it impressed me very much, because it spoke of the modesty of the Director, and told me that he was a stranger to all the self-important airs and painful respect which so many officials here demand. I was accustomed to seeing Father on the left side of Resident or a.s.sistant Resident, never mind how much younger the latter might be.

But not only I, Europeans even are seriously annoyed by the silly regulations of rank here. The newly arrived European officials and the Regents take their places upon chairs while the cold ground covered (and sometimes uncovered) with a bamboo mat, is good enough for a native wedono, who has grown grey in the service.

The most petty European sits upon a chair, while native officials of any age, who are below the rank of regent, though they are often of distinguished ancestry, must sit upon the floor in their presence.

It certainly does not please the heart to see a grey wedono creep upon the ground before a young aspirant,[4] a youth who may have just left the school benches. But enough of that, it was only to explain why the courtesy of the Director, a man of such high authority, struck me so forcibly.

We heard the Director say to Father, "I have been all over Java and have talked with many chiefs, Regent. You have set the example by sending your girls to school. I have asked girls who were going to the grammar schools if they would like to go on with their studies, and they have all answered enthusiastically "Yes."

He asked Father where he thought the girls' school ought to be erected, whether in West, Middle or East Java.

O Stella, how my ears and eyes tingled and my heart beat with joy to hear that. At last we are to have light in our poor dark woman's world.

While Mijnheer talked to Father, Mevrouw talked to us. We drew near to her with such pleasure. She told me of the plan of her husband, and asked what I thought of it.

"A splendid idea, Mevrouw, which will be a blessing to the native women, but it would be a still greater blessing, if the girls were also given an opportunity to learn a vocation, that would place them in a position to make their own way in life, if after receiving an education, they should feel reluctant to go back into their old environment. And the woman whose spirit has been awakened, whose outlook has been broadened might not be able to live again in the world of her ancestors. She will have been taught what freedom means, and then shut up in a dungeon; taught to fly and then imprisoned in a cage. No, no, the truly enlightened woman could not possibly feel happy in our native environment, not as long as it remains as it is. There is only one road in life open for the native girl, and that is 'marriage.' And what marriage means among our people cannot be unknown to you, who have been so long in Java. Oh, we think it is splendid that your husband wishes to give girls advantages and education, but let that last be also a vocational education, and then your husband will truly have showered blessings upon our native world."

"Do you hear that?" she said enthusiastically to her husband. "This young lady asks vocational training for native girls."

Astonished, he turned to me and said, "Really, do you ask vocational training for girls? How would you arrange it? But tell us what you would like to be yourself?"

I felt all eyes fastened upon me; those of my parents burned into my face. I cast down my own eyes. There was a buzzing and roaring in my ears, but above it I seemed to hear the words "Kartini be brave, do not waver."

"But tell me what do you wish to be?"

"I know you wish to become a writer; but you do not have to be educated especially for that, you can become that by yourself."

Alas, for study I am too late; but at least I may "Raise my eyes on high and go humbly and quietly forward."

Mevrouw spoke to me for a long time about what you and I have discussed so often--"Woman." When we bade each other "Good-night," and were going to bed, she took my hands in both of hers, pressed them warmly and said "Little friend, we shall discuss this again some time; meanwhile I shall write to you often; will you do the same to me?"

The following morning we went with her part of the way, and during the three hours that we sat with her in the carriage she and I told each other so much. Although it was twelve o'clock when we separated the evening before, she had told her husband everything that she had learned from us.

"O Regent," she cried again and again, "Give me one of your daughters, let her come to Batavia with me. Do let this young lady come to visit me; I shall come and fetch her myself."

Father told her that he thought of going to Batavia this year, "But they must remain at home with Mama, Mevrouw!" With that she appeared overcome with distress; was it earnest or a jest?

They wish us to come to Batavia to plead our cause, and the cause of the native woman, in person before the high authorities. Oh, Stella, pray that if it should come to pa.s.s I shall be able to plead well.

At parting she said to me, "Be brave, have faith and courage, this cannot last for ever, some way will be found, be brave!"

Stella, am I dreaming or waking? Is there a happy future for us? Is it possible to hope that our dream is coming true? She has told me more but I dare not tell you now. It is still so far away, but it shines and beams before me like a star of hope. Later, Stella dear, when I have it in my arms and hold it tight, so that it cannot slip away, you shall know what it is. I have asked my sisters if I were really alive; I felt so unspeakably happy. Pray for me, dearest, that this may be no illusion, no empty mirage, that would be terrible.

When the Director saw our work, painting, embossing, etc., he asked if it would not be possible in a year's time for us to have an exhibition.

He was sorry that we had not sent more to the French exposition.

The next morning he said that he would speak to influential people at Batavia and see if an exposition of native work could not be arranged there for next year. "You must send a great deal of what you have shown us."

O Stella I could not speak; I turned to him and to her with tears in my eyes.

We felt as though we were in a dream, there was no yesterday--no tomorrow for us; only the joyous, splendid day existed. It made me dizzy, made me afraid! What if these dreams and illusions should vanish like smoke!

When I came home, I took up my pen at once to write to our friend Mevrouw Ovink. A few days ago I sent her a cry of despair, and my dear Moedertje must know that her daughter is happy again. I have told her nothing of what I have written here for you alone, I have only told her that I felt happy and full of the joy of life.

But I have told you everything, with just one exception, although you have a right to that too. For you have comforted me when I was in despair; your enthusiasm has given me strength, when I was weak. Stella, if I can ever do anything for my sisters in Java, it will be solely and only because of you.

I told you that Mevrouw Ter Horst invited me to write for her paper on the condition of the native woman; she believed that I was too reserved and suggested a form herself under which I could treat the subject: "A Talk between Two Regents' Daughters." She on her part will do everything to further the good cause.

I have Father's permission, Stella. So much lies under my hand; G.o.d grant that I can bring it to maturity.

All too often I write sketchy, commonplace things taken from our own lives. One of them appeared in the "Echo." As pseudonym I chose "Tiga Soedara" (The Three Sisters), although we three are one. Soon the ident.i.ty of "Tiga Soedara" was discovered, and there was a notice about my work in the _Locomotief_ (a daily paper here in India).

I found it tiresome; I should gladly have kept my writing secret; I do not like to be discussed. It may sound ungracious, but truly I did not deserve so many compliments. Still that notice in the paper had its good side too, and a very good one at that, for the next month two numbers of a new newspaper for natives were sent to Father, with the request that they be given to us, and also a letter came asking for the co-operation of "Tiga Soedara."

This is the first Netherland newspaper that has been founded for natives, and I expect many blessings for my people through the Dutch language. It is like our lilies! Dutch flowers which bloom in added fragrance and beauty when they are transplanted to distant India! The _Echo_ is now the _Nederlandsche Taal_.

You can easily imagine that I wrote an enthusiastic letter to its editor and founder (Director of the High School at Probolingo), placing my services at his disposal.

And soon a letter came from him with a list of subjects which he would like to have treated by me: the first was "Native Education for Girls"; after that "A Native Inst.i.tute" and "Javanese Art." Kartini never say I cannot--but I will. I will, Stella, I will. I hope fervently that you have not over-estimated my strength. I shall do my best.

Now I shall tell you something else. We three have begun to study French out of the little books of Servaas de Bruijn. We have wrestled through most of the four volumes and we now want you to recommend to us some simple, easy French books (not School books).