"Let her go, Vic. This has nothing to do with her."

Her polite smile did nothing to enhance her mangled facial features. "It has plenty to do with her, Special Agent McGraw. Isn't that what you liked me to call you when you f.u.c.ked me like a dog, refusing to actually look at my face when we made love? Oh wait ... except on our wedding night. You surrendered to the missionary position, but kept your eyes shut the whole time."

Knox gave Jillian a fleeting glance. She glared at him. How did she not know he had a wife?

"Vicki?"

"Vic." He looked at his ex-wife while speaking to Jillian. "Virtual Intelligence Command. Edgar gave her that code name. Everyone a.s.sumed the eyes and ears of G.A.I.L. was a man named Victor. Instead, it was his orphaned stepdaughter who happened to know her way around a computer. He took pity on her and gave her a job to let her be part of G.A.I.L. because her asthma prevented her from being in the field. Then I took pity on her and married her."

"Pity my a.s.s. You married me to get your greedy little hands deeper into the inner workings of G.A.I.L. You married me for money and power. You and all your other unscrupulous comrades took something good, something positive that came from my mother's death, and you turned it into a corrupt business."

"Money equals power, sweetheart. You don't protect innocent lives without a h.e.l.luva lot of power. An army needs deep pockets. Corruption is a fact of life."

"It was never about protecting innocent lives. For you it was always about revenge."

Jillian watched her two enemies sling their words.

"Jesus, Irene! What the f.u.c.k do you think this is? Revenge! You're out for revenge and everyone is collateral damage."

"Irene" narrowed her eyes, flitting them between Jillian and Knox. "Don't ever call me that again." She gritted out each word then took a puff from her inhaler.

"It's your name."

"It's not my G.o.dd.a.m.n name!" Her fist slammed the table, knocking over a can of Mountain Dew and her bow that had been propped up against the leg. "Irene died the day she became Vic. You never knew Irene. She was Gail's daughter-innocent and full of hope. Vic fed G.A.I.L's corruption. She married a cheater-a cheater who drove her to the edge of insanity and then shoved her off it. Five years, a.s.shole. I spent five years in that G.o.dforsaken place all because of you and your mistresses."

Irene's eyes bore into Jillian's.

"I wasn't his mistress," Jillian said with absolute resolution. It was the truth.

"You f.u.c.ked my husband." Irene's rage overshadowed her newfound commitment to G.o.d. Underneath that self-righteousness stood a human with an ego and bleeding emotions.

"I f.u.c.ked up your husband. I did not f.u.c.k him."

The man her mother supposedly loved since kindergarten, sodomized Jessica-raped her. She lacked all ability to rationalize any of that. Even the words caught in her throat. Her mother would never have loved a rapist. It was easy to stay strong when the events in her life held some sort of meaning, some shred of rationale. Knox McGraw and Sunny Day having been soul mates obliterated all sense of reason.

"Let her go, Irene."

She whipped around, s.n.a.t.c.hing her bow from the floor, loading an arrow, and piercing through Knox's shoulder in a single blink. "If I let her go, she'll kill me."

Psycho b.i.t.c.h with the bow and arrow skills of Robin Hood could predict the future. Except Jillian wouldn't just kill her ... she'd kill Knox too.

"Besides, the reunion has just begun. We have more guests that will be joining the party."

Knox grimaced at the arrow plunged into his shoulder. "Are you going to resurrect Sunny from the dead?" he seethed.

He ignored Jillian's scowl. The b.a.s.t.a.r.d had no right to mention her mother in that context.

"You never know. I have G.o.d on my side." Irene tossed the bow on the table.

"I think you're worshiping a false G.o.d." He goaded her.

"I think you're going to die first when my original plan was to save you until last. I wanted you to watch those around you perish from your indiscretions. I fear my need to shut you up will spoil my plans."

"I agree. Kill Knox first."

That got both of their attention.

"Or you could let me kill him."

Irene smirked. "You had your chance."

"I wasn't trying to kill him. Had I been ... he'd be dead."

She picked up the spilled pop can and headed up the stairs. "Behave, kids. I have some things to attend to."

When the door shut, Jillian looked at Knox. "You have more protection and resources than the FBI. How the h.e.l.l did she get you here?"

"She got you here."

"She snagged me in a grief-stricken state from the airport in Portland. I was on my way to AJ's funeral. What's your excuse?"

"I came willingly."

"Bulls.h.i.t. Where's your phone?"

"Home."

Jillian shook her head. "No way."

"Irene's smart. Crazy, but smart. Every bit of aintelligence' that came from G.A.I.L for nearly a decade came from her. She can track a mouse through a back alley in New York City. You were trained to kill with your hands, she was trained to a.s.sa.s.sinate by typing in a pa.s.sword on a keyboard. Trust me. She has eyes and ears on us as we speak. She's resourceful and manipulative." He smirked. "So believe me when I say she has people working for her that don't even know it. They work for cash. No questions. No names."

"The texts ... did you know she was the one sending them to me? Did you know she found G.o.d in the psych ward? Did you keep this from me?"

Knox shook his head, a gruff chuckle vibrated his chest. "No. She was admitted and I let her go. I didn't give her another thought-just happy to be rid of her. No need to keep tabs on someone locked up in a mental inst.i.tution. And I sure as h.e.l.l didn't know she found G.o.d."

Jillian narrowed her eyes. "You keep tabs on everyone. Don't try to convince me that you didn't know she was out."

He shrugged. "I knew she was out, and I had her followed for a month or so, but nothing she did warranted any more of my time or resources so I pulled my men from her. No flags. No threat."

"You were wrong."

He nodded. "I was wrong."

"What did she say to get you here? Why would you willingly walk into the lion's den without someone having your back?"

"You ... and Sunny."

"Don't. I don't want to talk about that."

Knox chuckled, tipping his head back against the wall and closing his eyes. "Then what do you want to talk about?"

"Luke. I want to know what you did to him, what you said to him."

"We chatted about the words you two exchanged in Houston. I'd planned on having the same conversation with you, but out of respect, I decided to wait until after the funeral."

"Respect? I'm not sure you know what that is."

"I'm not the bad guy you think I am."

"You're a monster."

Monsters prey on others because they have no self-control ... they're the weak ones.

Knox released a long breath. "I told Dr. Jones to forget about you. I told him to f.u.c.k as many women as it took to make that happen."

Once a monster, always a monster. Of course he said that to Luke.

"Don't give me that look."

He didn't have his eyes open. How could he know what look she gave him?

"You found another lover. You gave him your heart and he died, taking a part of you with him. Dr. Jones needs more than a memory to keep him warm at night. You could have chosen him, but you left him behind. I told him as much. He needs to be angry and p.i.s.sed at you to move on."

"I didn't give AJ my heart. I didn't have a heart left to give him." Her words lacked conviction, in spite of her intent to mean them, in spite of wishing they were true.

"I moved heaven and earth for you in your last-ditch effort to save him. People don't do that for a good f.u.c.k. He meant something to you."

"Jude killed him, but you knew that, didn't you? I'm sure you had your hand in covering it up ... making it look like he died from the cancer and making sure his body made it back to Portland without suspicion."

Knox smiled, eyes still shut. "Your brother is an unscrupulous lethal weapon. He takes lives without a blink of hesitation. That's rare. Even your father and I battled with our consciences when aiming our guns at known killers, but not Jude. He was born to kill. But ... something tells me he blinked more than once before taking Sergeant Monaghan's life. He knew he was also killing a part of you. He killed AJ to save you."

"f.u.c.k you."

"I know. f.u.c.k me. f.u.c.k Jackson. It doesn't change anything."

Irene brought Knox there to torture Jillian. She knew the emotional pain he could inflict would hurt her more than any kind of physical torture.

"He's with someone. Her name is Charlie. She's Lake's physical therapist. My sources told me she's smart, beautiful, and his family seems to adore her."

Adore.

She didn't begrudge Luke a single thing. Jillian wanted him to find happiness. Luke deserved a happily ever after more than she did. Of course imagining him with someone else filled her with pain, but Knox was right, Jackson was right ... she chose to leave him behind. If she had it all to do over again, she would have made the same decision. Luke's family needed him.

"I'm happy for him ... for them."

"Really?" Knox opened his eyes.

"I loved him enough to let him go."

"How kind of you. I'm sure he doesn't see it that way. I never took you for the if-you-love-something-set-it-free type."

Questions whirled in her head. Had her mother let Knox go? Did he let her go? With her mother dead, would Jillian ever know the whole truth? Did she want to know the truth?

Chapter Nineteen.

Jones The unanswerable question. Where does one search for someone who doesn't want to be found? For the safety of his family, Luke had to go through the motions of his life until the universe answered that question for him-until Jessica answered that question. He remained Dr. Jones by day, transforming into the man willing to risk his career and his own life to find her.

"Brother dearest?" Lake called, letting herself into Luke's place.

He needed to confiscate her key.

"In my office." He clicked out of his search screens and shut the top to his computer.

"Watching p.o.r.n?"

He leaned back in his desk chair, resting his folded hands on his stomach.

"To what do I owe this unannounced visit?"

She eased into the leather chaise lounge in the corner of his office. "Nonsense. I announced myself when I opened the door."

"You need to get enrolled in school again or find a job."

"I have a job."

"I mean a paying job, a forty-hours-a-week job." Luke applauded his sister for volunteering to work with amputee children at the hospital, a position Charlie suggested, but it became her excuse to not reenroll in college after her accident. Their parents weren't going to be able to support her living in San Francisco forever and Luke loved his sister, but he was not an enabler.

"Will you drive me home tomorrow to spend the weekend with Mom and Dad?"

"I can't."

"Why not? Mom and Dad want to see you, but they have guests and can't come visit us."

"I have somewhere I need to be."

"Where?"

He gave her a pointed look. "Since when are you my keeper?"

"Since Jessica died and since you blew off Charlie."