I havent heard my mothers voice in months. Its strange since she used to talk to me all the time. I honestly miss her, Allie has been my main focus. Not killing anyone in so long. I feel different, even though I'm the undead I feel alive since I've met her. My heart doesnt feel so cold, and when I'm near her my chest gets warm. I love this feeling. She gives me a purpose now in life. And I think she even wants to start a family with me. My face is getting warm thinking about it. I've see people do that naked thing, it usually makes me angry. Just the thought of it in general makes me see red. I've never done that before, it makes me nervous. I wonder if mom would get mad if I did that. After all she did say it was bad. I dont wanna disappoint her. Doing that with Allie sounds nice, but I dont know how to tell her. I'm not sure I would even know what to do. Maybe mom will explain the next time I talk to her. This tingly anxious feeling I have seems to get worse the more I'm around Allie.

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