"Kurt has other plans tonight," I reply in French as my gaze darts around the room.

"Oh. Are we sad?"

"No, it's fine. I'm actually meeting-"

"Isla!"

It comes from the corner table. St. Clair is waving me down as Josh turns around in his chair. Everything transitions into slow motion. The maitre d', the noisy chatter, the smoky fragrance of the wood-fired pizza they vanish as I wait for his eyes to find mine.

We lock.

The entire contents of my heart reflect back at me in his expression. Joy, pain, strength, wonder, sadness, beauty, hope. He is everything.

"Ah," the maitre d' says. "Of course."

He guides me towards the table as my heartbeat thumps in my throat. The room closes in. My soul aches with attraction. There are four empty seats, and the maitre d' pulls out the chair beside Josh. I'm shaking as I place my coat onto the back of it. I'm shaking as I sit down. I'm shaking as Josh glances at the maitre d' with a look of unmistakable grat.i.tude. Does that glance mean what I want it to mean?

"Where's Kurt?" Josh asks.

"He's out with some new friends. Underground. It's a long story."

Josh lifts his eyebrows in surprise as the rest of the table beams at me St. Clair, Anna and Meredith. "Wow," I say. "The gang's all here."

"Everyone but Rashmi," St. Clair says.

Anna gives him a swift kick below the table, but I catch it. "It's okay," I say awkwardly. At least it's answered a question. They know about my history with Josh. I glance at the three empty seats. "Is she coming?"

"One of those was for Kurt," Josh says, and I'm touched.

"The others are for our friends who got us into the Olympics," Anna says. "We split up today, and they're still out sightseeing. They should be here any minute."

"Friends from California?" I grab the opportunity to show them that I'm not completely in the dark. Just mostly.

She nods. "Yeah, Lola and Cricket. etienne and I-"

"etienne," Josh says, and Meredith cracks up.

"They're teasing me because I'm the only person who calls him that," Anna explains.

"You're the only person allowed to call him that," Josh says. "You and his mom."

St. Clair smiles. "The only two ladies I need."

"That's sick," Meredith says, but she's still laughing. She has a wonderful, friendly laugh. A tiny nose ring catches the light and twinkles. Everything about her is cheerful.

It's unreal to be surrounded here, in person, by his friends. Those faces from his artwork.

Anna is one of those naturally beautiful girls who has no idea that she's beautiful. She dresses in jeans and T-shirts, and she has this gap-toothed smile and a bleached stripe in her long brown hair. She's comfortable in her own skin. Her boyfriend is also beautiful, but he's aware of it. Not that St. Clair acts like a jerk. He's just loaded with confidence. He's short, but it's never gotten in his way. Nearly every girl at school was in love with him, not to mention most of the guys and half the professeurs.

But I was never in love with him. Not when Josh was around.

Anna clears her throat. "Anyway. etienne and I-"

Josh and Meredith snicker.

Anna grins. "-work with Lola at a movie theatre. Cricket is her boyfriend, and Cricket's twin sister is Calliope Bell. The figure skater?"

My eyebrows shoot up. "I've seen her face on about a billion advertis.e.m.e.nts."

"That's the one. She's going for the gold."

"And you're all here to cheer her on?" I glance at Josh. He appears to be calm, but it's superficial. A frenetic energy is pulsating from his core. Vibrating against me. I rub my arms, hair on end, but the others don't seem to notice.

"Sort of." St. Clair shrugs. It's slow and full-bodied, very French. Maman has the same one. "Mainly we're using it as an excuse to visit."

I turn to Meredith. "Did you come in from Rome? That's where you're attending university, right?"

"Yeah." She puts an arm around Josh and her curly head on his shoulder, but they're clearly gestures of friendship. "When I heard everyone was coming, I couldn't resist."

"And you?" I don't look at Josh. He knows the question is for him.

He can't meet my eyes either. "Same for me, I guess. Couldn't resist."

St. Clair waggles his eyebrows at Josh, but the moment he sees that I've caught him, his expression changes to a flirtatious grin. "Aw, mate," he says to Josh. "Admit it. You couldn't resist me."

Josh relaxes into a smile. "You're like a gorgeous little bonbon."

"Delicious in every way," St. Clair says.

Anna rolls her eyes. "Wait until you try his creamy centre."

St. Clair bursts into laughter as Meredith squeals. The chemistry between the four of them is as if they hadn't spent a day apart. My heart squeezes, but it's not from jealousy. It's out of happiness for Josh's sake. He leans across the table to jostle St. Clair, but he knocks against my arm instead.

"Sorry," Josh says quickly. His voice turns strained. He sits, and the jovial mood crashes down with him, but his touch shudders through me in waves.

Longing. As fierce and powerful as ever.

I look away, not wanting him to see how badly I wish he would touch me again. And then I discover a strange apparition outside the restaurant's window. I blink. It's still there. In the winter, the streets of Paris are grey and the coats that walk them are black.

So this...this is like...

"The circus," Josh says, finishing my thought out loud. "It's like the circus has come to town."

"Brilliant," St. Clair says. "That must be Lola and Cricket."

A boy and a girl enter the restaurant. The boy is ridiculously tall and skinny far more extreme than Josh and it's only emphasized by the tightness of his pinstriped pants. He could almost be wearing stilts. He's wearing a bright blue military jacket, and his wrists are covered in rainbow-coloured bracelets and rubber bands. The girl is wearing a gigantic, poufy skirt with pink and yellow and turquoise crinoline peeking out from underneath. She also has a military jacket, Vietnam-era army green, but hers has been decorated with pink glitter. And she has matching pink hair.

"Hi!" Lola plops down beside me, and her skirt fwoomps up and onto my lap. "Yikes. Sorry about that." She smiles as she jams it underneath the table.

"How did you manage to fit all of that into a suitcase?" I'm impressed.

Her smile grows from ear to ear. "I'm a championship-level packer."

St. Clair snorts. "She also brought three times the amount of luggage as the rest of us."

"But she is a good packer," Cricket says. "You'd be amazed at how much she managed to squish into those extra suitcases."

He pulls out the chair beside her, and she reaches up with both arms to hold him as he sits down. Not because he needs steadying, but because they're clearly in the earliest stages of love. She simply needs to touch him. They double-hold-hands below the table. I feel a sharp pang as I remember doing the same with Josh. Lola gives Cricket a kiss, square on the lips, and he looks as if he might explode from happiness.

"Hey," Lola says, suddenly seeing Josh. "I think I saw you on TV a few months ago."

"It's possible," Josh says.

"You must be Isla and Josh," Cricket says.

I almost correct him Oh, no, we aren't a couple when I realize he means Isla and Josh. Not Isla-and-Josh. I shake his extended hand, feeling sad. "And Meredith," he says, leaning over me to shake hers.

"I like your hair," she says.

"Thanks," he says. It stands on end, further adding to his manic height.

"So none of you have to ask," Lola says. "Six four. Without the hair."

"etienne is five four," Anna says. "With his boots."

"Without," St. Clair protests. But his grin tells another story.

"You're shorter than I thought." I say it without thinking. "Sorry." I wince. "I only meant you don't seem that small." I wince again.

"Confidence, darling." He leans across the table and touches a finger to my cheek. "You could learn something from me, you know."

My face turns pink. But I laugh, pleased to be included in their good-natured ribbing. Josh looks at me, worried, and I turn in my seat to face him full on. I smile. He exhales with relief, and I lean in closer.

"We're okay," I whisper. "Aren't we?"

"It's all I want," he says.

Our server appears. We startle apart, and my heart races. Does that mean he wants to be friends again? Or am I what he wants? With all that wanting connotes?

We place an order for a ton of pizzas, and normally I'd be thrilled about the variety, but all I want to do is return to the previous conversation. But our window of privacy is gone. The table pulls us into discussion about the Olympics. Apparently, Cricket's twin would be a shoo-in for the gold medal, but she's convinced that she has a second-place curse. Everyone says they're sure she'll be fine, but Cricket is weird and jittery. I get the sense that he believes in the curse, too, though he won't admit it. Talk turns to everyone's schools. I wait for Josh to chime in, but he never does. I wonder if that means he still hasn't enrolled anywhere. But maybe he's waiting for me to speak first.

The silence in our corner grows.

The pizza arrives. With each bite, I beg myself to ask if he's finishing high school. I beg myself to ask if he's still moving to Vermont. But, the truth is, I'm afraid of his answer. It's been less than two months, and I left him broken-hearted. How could he have already found the energy to attend or care about a new school?

My guilt and fear push us further apart.

"Are you okay?" Josh asks. "You've hardly eaten anything."

I look at his plate. "Neither have you."

He opens his mouth to reply, when St. Clair stands. "We're off," he says, meaning him and Anna and no one else. She looks as surprised as the rest of us.

"We haven't even had dessert," Meredith says.

"I'm taking my lady friend somewhere special for dessert."

"You are?" Anna says.

"I am."

Anna looks happy enough. "Okay." She gathers her things and looks bewilderedly at the rest of us. "Guess I'll see you guys tomorrow?" Her eyes fall on me. "Oh, no! I wanted to catch up. Well, hopefully, we'll be seeing each other again. Soon. Good luck."

I pounce on her words. Soon. Good luck. They're general statements, but they feel specific. They feel promising. Anna and St. Clair hug everybody goodbye, even me. The hug between Josh and St. Clair lasts the longest. It's a real hug, not a lame guy-hug. My heart breaks a little more. Anna and St. Clair leave the restaurant. Meredith, Lola and I sit down, but Josh and Cricket exchange a meaningful look.

Josh flags down the server. "L'addition, s'il vous plait." Check, please.

"We're leaving?" I can't hide the disappointment from my voice. A proper French dinner should keep us here for at least another hour.

Josh pauses, mid-reach for his wallet. He looks at me, searching, and I find hope in his eyes. It makes me feel hopeful, too. He smiles. "Something better is about to happen."

"Hurry, hurry, hurry." Cricket bounces on the b.a.l.l.s of his feet.

"Do you know what's happening?" Lola asks me.

I shake my head as Meredith looks between Josh and Cricket. "Didn't you two just meet? How can you already have secrets?"

Josh grins so wide that his dimples appear. My heart flutters at the well-missed sight. He and Cricket toss down some bills from their wallets, and then Josh is yanking out a bulging shoulder bag from behind the table. "Come on." He's still smiling at me as he throws on his coat. It's his going-on-a-date coat, of course.

That coat. It hurts how much I love it.

The five of us race through the snowy white streets towards the River Seine. The sun has gone down, and most of the Latin Quarter appears to be staying inside tonight. Josh glances at my feet. I'm wearing heeled boots, but I'm keeping in stride with everyone else. He shoots me an impressed eyebrow-raise as we burst out of the neighbourhood, directly across from Notre-Dame.

"Where?" Cricket asks Josh.

"In the square, near the main entrance." Josh points across the bridge. We run across it towards Notre-Dame's courtyard.

"Oh," Meredith says, understanding. "Seriously?"

Lola looks at me, and we explode into helpless laughter. Neither of us has any idea what's happening. We're panting, out of shape and out of breath.

"Stop!" Josh says.

We tumble to a halt behind him. We're on the edge of the square facing the ma.s.sive cathedral. "I a.s.sume we didn't run all the way here to see a structure that hasn't left this spot in hundreds of years?" Lola readjusts her pink hair, and I realize it's a wig. "What am I looking at?"

But then I see them.

Several yards away closer to the cathedral's legendary carved doorways Anna and St. Clair are standing on top of Point Zero. It's been hand-brushed clear of its dusting of snow. Point Zero is the bronze marker, a star, which designates the official centre of France. There are at least two superst.i.tions about it. One is that anyone who stands on the star will return to France. The other is that you can use it to make a wish.