Irium - 29 Pain
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29 Pain

And so, the last thing I need to see – is a b.l.o.o.d.y foreigner lying on the wasteland like it's his grandma's lawn.

"Hey!" I say to the man lying like a dead donkey in the middle of the wasteland, "Get up! And leave! Or I'll kill you!"

My English speaking skills have grown good enough for me to have conveyed this much well enough, and so I can only wonder why this idiot doesn't do as I say. Does he think I alone can't do anything to him? Ha! You underestimate the power of an Indian farmer, you piece of s.h.i.+t! Now, take that!

I shout that in my mind as I use the rod I was to use to bring back my ox, to give him a 'wake-up call'.

BAM!

There's that sound of the impact. Now, this guy, like every one of those foreigners I've seen, should get up and get the heck away.

"Ah!" but instead of running away and bringing more people later like every one of those foreigners I've seen, this guy just moans.

Well, maybe he's a bit resilient. Another strike should do the job.

BAM!

Thinking that, I hit him again and,

"Ah! Ah! You're so naughty, baby." He says while holding the sand like he's holding some kind of precious object.

What the giant f.u.c.k!

This guy is tough, at least tougher than every other foreigner I've seen.

"Admirable!" I remark. He maybe an enemy of mine and my rod but he still deserves some respect for having sustained two strikes. Well, the third strike is where it ends though. I think that and put my weight on my toes, my hand moving back the furthest it could while holding the rod in hand, I prepare to strike the most critical blow yet. And with all that preparation done,

BAAAM!!!

A much larger sound comes this time. I am sure he would have already crossed Ganges in fear by this point, but just to confirm, I should take a look.

"AH! Baby! More, give me more!"

"Don't stop, give me more!"

"Come on, baby! I want more!"

Well, you are gonna get your wish, jacka.s.s!

BAM! BAM!

"AH! AH! More!"

BAM! BAM!

"AH! AH! More!"

BAM! BAM! BAM!

"AH! AHA! AHAHA! MORE!!!"

*****

When I wake up, everything that happened before immediately comes to my mind. That's right, we time-travelled and have come back to 1856, in India. Before I do anything here, I need to find Irium. Who knows if he'll survive India for more than hour or so without me around to help him!?

Well, he might, but you can never be too sure with these people with the Protagonist Complex.

Anyway, after these thoughts pa.s.s through my mind, I decide to get up and see what kind of place I ended up in. But, just as soon as I move a little, I feel pain immeasurable to what I've ever felt.

"AAAAHHH!!!"

What the heck happened? Why does it feel like I got beaten up by a wooden rod a 100 times or something like that? Wait! Wasn't that feeling too specific? Anyway, I need this pain to stop. G.o.d, this burns because of the heat! Who could possibly do something like this to me, whatever it is that they did?

"Ah, you're awake." Then, comes a voice that I don't have the mental capacity to ignore the pain and focus enough on it to name its characteristics. I feel like it's the voice of a 14-15 year old boy though.

"Hey, kid! Bring a first-aid kit here! No, bring an ambulance here! No, bring the entire hospital here!" I am hoping this kid knows enough English to understand me and will do as I say.

"Please!" he says in a polite voice.

"Yes, please! Bring me some help! Bring me a medical field master! If not that, bring me a hot chick!" I say without being able to calm down because of the pain.

"Please, accept me …" He continues in his polite voice.

"Yes, please accept me in the nearby hospital. I can't stand enough to fill in the form." I can just hope hospitals in 1856 India were accepting people without any BS like a form.

"Kindly listen to me!" the boy gets a tinge of darkness in his eyes as he says that, but not even that can scare me right now. Not even Yuno Gasai can scare me right now. Not even Irium, with all of his protagonist privileges, can scare me right now. I am just in too much pain to be afraid right now. Someone, anyone, do something! Treat me! Make the pain go away! Or, special right for women, you can just kiss me as well, I fully accept that payment option!

"Hah!" the boy sighs as he sees that I'm not listening to him. "If I take you to a clinic,"

"TAKE ME TO A G.o.dd.a.m.n HOSPITAL!" I shout like a pregnant woman dying with the pain of the baby trying to come out of my womb.

"THERE ARE NO HOSPITALS HERE!" the boy shouts at me, "G.o.d, these foreigners!"

"Eh, fine, take me to a clinic." I say, not being able to withhold my pain any longer.

"If I do that," he returns to being polite as he says, "can you become my teacher and teach me your ways of resilience."

"Ha!?" I look at him with a stupid expression.

"Thank you! Now come, let us go to the clinic!" the boy says with a smile.

[Note: 'Ha' can be interpreted as 'haan' which mean 'yes' in Hindi]

That smile on the kid's face. T-That … that's a flag. Oh lord, that's a flag! And I just triggered it!

I get the feeling I grew more important in this volume than I ever intended to. Why, author, why? Was it not enough to make me the b.u.t.t of all jokes whenever two people talked to each other in my presence? What kind of h.e.l.l have you unleashed upon me now?

*****