"You go over there and browse in the electronics," Jamie kindly directed. "Just leave me the empty cart."

"You do love me, don't ya?" Ryan grinned, taking her up on her offer before she could change her mind.

When the cart was groaning, Jamie signaled her partner and they threaded their way through the confusing lines, where Ryan took over and guided the carts to the shortest line in the entire store. "You're good at this," Jamie complimented her.

"Practice, practice, practice."

"Hey, how about if I ask Mom to come help us trim the tree tonight? I don't think she's ever actually done one herself."

"Great idea," Ryan agreed. "See if she wants to have dinner first."

Catherine did indeed wish to join them, but she insisted that they allow her to take them out to dinner, since they had been running around all day.

Ryan heard Jamie's end of the conversation, and she asked for the phone. "Hey, Catherine?"

"Yes, dear?"

"How about that fabulous dim sum Jamie's always talking about? Isn't that place near your house?"

"You'd do anything to get out of going to a restaurant, wouldn't you, Ryan?" she teased.

"You've learned my tricks pretty quickly, Catherine. But I'll behave if you really want to go out."

"No, dear, I love dim sum too. I'll bring enough for Mia, in case she's at home."

Over a fabulous dinner of all of Ryan's favorites, Catherine revealed what she had learned from her travel agent. Mia was present, but Jamie had told her mother that they were planning on surprising her with the trip, so she spoke as though the plans were for Ryan and Jamie alone.

"I spoke with my agent and he can get you into a fabulous room on HarborIsland," she said excitedly.

"Is that in the Bahamas?" Ryan asked.

"Yes, HarborIsland is right off the tip of Eleuthra, which is one of the bigger islands. Anyway, he can book you from the thirty-first through the second. You could fly home on Monday the third, and be back in time for practice."

"Can you take time off during basketball?" Mia asked.

"Yeah, we get Sunday and Monday off," Ryan said. "And if we win both games in North Carolina I don't have to come home with the team," she added, waggling her eyebrows playfully.

"What!" Jamie shouted.

"I told Coach Hayes about this trip, and she said I could go directly to the Bahamas if we win both games."

"But, honey, what if you don't win?" Jamie protested.

"Do you really think I would allow us to lose with that kind of carrot dangling in front of my nose?" Ryan smirked.

"Ryan, things happen that you can't control. We won't be able to cancel if you have to go home," Jamie explained.

"Then I'll just have to run a bunch of laps," she declared defiantly, "'cause we're going!"

"G.o.d, you guys are making me soooo jealous," Mia mused.

"Don't you have any plans for New Year's, Mia?" Catherine asked, trying to surrept.i.tiously feel her out.

She looked down at her plate and muttered, "Not anymore."

"Oh, I'm sorry, dear. What about Christmas?"

She brightened up a little as she cast a smile at Ryan. "I'm going over to Ryan's for Christmas Eve," she related. "My parents are going to be in Rome, and they wanted me to come with, but I just wasn't in the mood." Looking at Catherine she asked, "What about you Mrs.... I mean, Catherine," she corrected herself.

"I'll be with all of you on Christmas Eve," she revealed. "Then the girls are coming down to my house for Christmas Day. You're more than welcome to join us, Mia."

"Thanks," she smiled. "I might just do that. Do you have big plans for New Years, Catherine?"

Jamie held her breath since she knew this would be a tough time for her mother. In all of the excitement, she didn't stop to think of how sad it would be to be alone at the dawn of the new millennium.

"I've decided to go to Italy," she revealed. "I'm leaving on the twenty-sixth and coming back on the tenth."

"That's great, Mom," Jamie said enthusiastically. "Are you... meeting friends there?"

"Ahh... yes, Jamie. I won't be alone."

"It must be really hard for you right now," Mia said with sympathy.

"It is, dear, and thank you for your concern. I'm dealing with it as best I can."

"You're doing a lot better than my mom did when she thought she'd caught my dad cheating," Mia laughed, blushing furiously as she heard herself give voice to the family secret.

Mia's mother, Anna Lisa, had a legendary temper, and Catherine could only imagine what her reaction would have been. She couldn't contain her curiosity, and asked, "What happened, dear?"

"It was a long time ago - I was probably in high school," she mused. "It was early in the morning, before school. My older brother came running down the stairs yelling, "'Hide, Mia! Mom's coming!' Of course, there were a million reasons for me to a.s.sume I had done something wrong, so I started running!" She laughed at the memory. "I ran out the front door with Peter right after me, and we were halfway down the driveway when my dad came running down the driveway in his boxer shorts!"

Catherine's mouth gaped open at this revelation, and Ryan had begun to chuckle as Mia continued. "Two seconds later, the door flies open, and my mom is there on the front step brandishing a big knife! She starts yelling at the top of her lungs that if she ever caught him with his... uhm... member... in another woman, she'd cut it off and grind it up for sausage!"

Ryan was slumped down in her seat, unable to hold herself upright through her laughter. But Jamie and Catherine sat unblinking with their mouths agape as Mia concluded, "I don't think she really would have." After a beat she added, "But you never know, do you? All I know is that if he ever fooled around on her, she never found out about it."

"Did he really have an affair?" Jamie asked, still stunned.

"Don't know. I don't think she knows either," Mia admitted. "I think she was just suspicious, to tell you the truth."

Catherine finally found her voice and said, "I think your mother had the right idea, Mia. If I had taken a stronger stand, Jim might not have had the nerve to keep it up."

"That's exactly what my dad was worried about," she said seriously. "He wanted to make sure he could keep it up!"

The four of them drove over to Jennie's just as it was getting dark. Jamie, Catherine and Mia had decided to stay at the group home and organize the ornaments and lights, to allow for several of the girls to go with Ryan to pick up the tree. Jennie clearly had other ideas, because she grabbed Ryan's hand before she could get fully into the house and declared, "n.o.body else wants to go. Come on," she urged when Ryan didn't move quickly enough to suit her.

"Okay, okay," she laughed. "Give me a half second." She let the young woman lead her back down the sidewalk and into the car. As she started it up she asked, "Something wrong?"

"Huh-uh," Jennie said with a smile. "I just don't get to see you alone much any more. I... kinda miss it," she admitted.

"You know, I never stopped to consider that," Ryan said thoughtfully. Turning to Jennie she said, "I'm sorry for that, Jen. I should have asked you if you minded doing things with other people all of the time."

"I don't mind, Ryan," she insisted. "I just like to be alone with you, too. There's stuff I can't talk about with other people around."

"Anything you need to talk about now?" Ryan asked as she steered the car towards the local tree lot.

"No, not a lot," she said.

"How are you feeling about the holidays?" Ryan asked gently. "Are you okay about being at Safe Haven?"

Casting a quick glance over at her friend, Ryan saw silent tears sliding down her pink cheeks. Turning the car onto a side street, she pulled to a stop and got out. Jogging around to Jennie's side, she opened the door and tugged at her shoulder until she got out as well. Ryan enveloped the small body in a tender hug, rubbing her back at the same time. "I'm sorry, Jen, I know it's hard to be away from home," she whispered.

"It's just hard at Christmas..." she began, but Ryan knew it was much more than that. Being fourteen and abandoned in various ways by both parents had to be a wound that would never truly heal. She thought of her own fragile psyche, scarred severely because of her mother's death. The thought of having her parents voluntarily leave her was more than she could fathom.

"I know, Jen, I know," she murmured as the small body shook against her. She knew there were no words to soothe her pain, so she offered her love and her empathy through her touch.

"I'm so glad you're my friend, Ryan," she choked out. "I don't know where I'd be without you."

"I'll always be your friend, Jennie," she said solemnly. "I've never lied to you, have I?" she asked as she pulled back and made eye contact with the red rimmed eyes.

"No, never," she agreed.

"I promise that I will always be here for you, Jen. I don't make promises like that often, and when I make one, you can count on it. Do you believe me?"

Her trusting blue eyes opened wide, and she nodded her head slowly. "I believe you, Ryan," she murmured softly as she leaned in for another hug. She took a deep breath and revealed, "I didn't ask the other kids if they wanted to come tonight. I just wanted to be alone with you."

"That's okay, sweetie. I'd rather be with you anyway," she said as she leaned down and kissed her head. "Hey, what's going on here?" she teased, running her hand through the fine blonde hair. "Did you run out of razors?"

"No," she said with a smirk. "I uhm... kinda want to look like..."

"The other girls at school?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah." She blushed softly as she asked, "Do you think I'll fit in?"

"I do, and I'll help you in any way I can. How about I take you for a cool new haircut right before school starts?"

"Haircut?" she asked in amazement. "I think I need more hair, not less!"

"The guy I'll take you to can give you a little trim that will make everyone ask where you get your hair cut," Ryan promised. "You can be a trendsetter!"

The tree tr.i.m.m.i.n.g party lasted until nearly ten o'clock. By the end of the evening, each of the girls had picked one of the older women to flirt with outrageously, save for Jennie, of course. To Ryan's great relief, three of the others decided that Mia was the one for them, and she mused that the constant attention seemed to be a good remedy for Mia's doldrums, even though the girls were only 16 and 17 years old. The boldest of the group, J.C., still had a hankering for Ryan, and the older woman politely put up with the not-so-subtle flirting until Jamie actually got up and insinuated herself between Ryan and her young admirer. Jennie's friend, Callie, seemed to have a crush on Jamie, but she was much more subtle in her overtures.

On the way home, Catherine observed, "Do you really think that's a good atmosphere for Jennie to grow up in? Those girls seemed so overtly s.e.xual!"

"Oh, they are," Ryan agreed. "Most of them have been tossed out of the house for some pretty outlandish behavior, and I would guess that most have been s.e.xually abused at some point in their lives. Jennie has been around that type of thing for a couple of years now, and she really hasn't acted out s.e.xually. Sandy keeps a very strict watch on the girls to make sure the older ones are never alone with the younger ones. Hopefully she'll meet some average kids her own age at Sacred Heart who can be good influences on her."

"I worry about her," Catherine repeated. "She is such a sweet child."

"She really is," Ryan agreed. "But wasn't it clear tonight why it's hard to place kids who've been abused? Those girls were practically in our laps!"

"I was about to pop that J.C. character," Jamie mumbled.

"You can't let them get to you, Jamie," Ryan reminded her. "They're just lonely kids who don't know how to get love any other way."

"Oh, she knew how she wanted to get love, all right," Jamie a.s.sured her. "And she looked like she could teach you a thing or two!"

"Uh-uh, no way," Ryan vowed. "You're my one and only teacher!"

After practice the next day, Ryan dashed up the stairs to the Berkeley house, water dripping from the windproof/waterproof jacket and pants that Jamie had purchased for her after the soaking she had taken while getting lost running in a rainstorm. The day was very cold, the kind of damp cold that makes one's joints ache. Surprised to see how dry she was, Ryan took off her jacket and pants while still on the porch, her T-shirt and tights keeping her from shocking the neighbors.

She heard some very loud music coming from the living room, and after a moment she rolled her eyes at hearing one of the pop bands that Jamie had an inexplicable fondness for. I'll distract her and put something decent on, she decided, opening the door to find her partner gently swaying to the music. I'll never understand how she can like really complex cla.s.sical pieces and this pabulum!

Ryan had opened the door so soundlessly, and the music was so loud, that for a moment the smaller woman didn't realize that she was being observed. Ryan leaned against the door, her face twitching into a warm smile as she watched her partner move gracefully to the music.

Jamie had a beautiful, graceful style of dancing that warmed Ryan's heart. The blonde often teased that Ryan didn't really dance - she just had vertical s.e.x. Jamie however, had a much more demure, understated style that perfectly matched her personality. Smooth, poised, and refined - but with an undercurrent of pa.s.sion that only someone who knew her well would notice. Ryan most definitely knew her well, and she felt her mouth begin to go dry when the beat picked up a little and Jamie's hips began to twitch more forcefully. Oh, my, she sighed internally, as her own hips picked up the beat. She checked her watch, and noted that they had two hours to kill, and she immediately decided just how the time would die.

She started to take a step towards her partner, but just as she did, Jamie moved under one of the warm lights that cast a golden glow onto her body. Ryan had never considered herself overly impressed by good looks. As adorable as she found Jamie, she had to admit that her outward appearance was not even in the top ten reasons that she was attracted to her. But every once in a while, she moved in a certain way, or had a particular expression on her face that made Ryan look at her as though it were the first time.

Ryan sucked in a breath as she considered what a fantastic-looking woman she had chosen to spend her life with. From her spun-gold hair to her dark blonde eyebrows, and lashes that batted slowly, hiding her verdant green eyes - Ryan loved every feature. Her small, well-formed nose and her absolutely luscious lips, so full and succulent-looking. And her skin... Ryan honestly had no words for her skin. As far as she knew, no one had ever been clever or poetic enough to conjure up words for the flawless wrapper that covered the most wonderful package in the world.

Without a word, Ryan kicked off her shoes and padded across the room, sweeping Jamie into her arms as she continued to move right along to the beat of the music. The smaller woman let out a gasp when Ryan's body wrapped around hers, but she quickly regained her equilibrium, managing to maintain the beat.

They moved together, neither speaking - neither needing to. Their bodies spoke volumes, and neither wished to interrupt. The next song was one that Ryan heard often, and she knew it was a favorite of her partner's. Surprisingly, when the lyrics began, Jamie started to sing along - but in Spanish. Ryan had privately thought that the song was ridiculously sappy, but the perfectly accented Spanish gave the tune a mysterious flavor that carried Ryan away. She closed her eyes and listened to her lover sing to her, while their bodies touched gently all along their lengths.

Cuando sintas tristeza

Que no pudas calmar

Cuando haya un vacio

Que no puedas llenar

Te abrazare