*Pretty hard to offload a house where a guy had his head cut off,' he said, scratching his neck.

*How old was he again?'

*Ninety-two.'

Benji walked up to the windows, put his hands around his eyes and peered in. I followed and leaned in next to him. The hardwood floors were bare and a pile of real estate brochures was stacked high on the kitchen counter.

*Imagine surviving being blacklisted in Hollywood, clawing your way back into the industry, watching your wife die of cancer, and then finally you're in your twilight years and bam! Some LSD crazed psycho breaks into your house and cuts off your head for no reason.'

*Didn't that guy kill someone else too?' I asked. Benji turned around and sat on the front lawn. I joined him. The grass was freshly cut and the smell tickled my nose.

*Sure did. The guy broke in here, cut the old man's head off, then climbed over the back fence carrying the head, and killed the guy in the next house. Cut off his dick.'

*God. What a bummer trip.'

*Totally. He dumps the head with the other body, then makes his way over to Paramount Studios, tries to get in, but is taken down by some security guards who can sense something is seriously messed up with this dude.'

*No shit.'

I pulled at the lawn with my fingers. The earth felt warm beneath me. Sometimes I didn't mind that one day I would become part of the soil, that we all would. It seemed like the only logical way to keep the human race ticking over. Other days it frightened me beyond words. But not today. Today it felt natural and right. I watched the ants crawl up my leg and Benji scanned through the photos on his camera. He pointed the lens at me.

*Smile.'

*Benji, don't,' I said, putting my hand in front of my face.

*Oh come on,' he moaned. *Just one picture.'

*You know I don't like having my picture taken,' I whined, but that wasn't it. I just didn't want Benji to have any photos of me. I couldn't shake the feeling that I wouldn't like what he would do with them.

*Maybe one day we could have a place like this,' he said, giving up. *After school finishes we could get a bungalow in West Hollywood, or Laurel Canyon.'

*I thought you were going to college in New York? Remember? You wanted to walk the streets in a trench coat like James Dean.'

*I said that when I was, like, sixteen.'

*And that was soooo long ago.'

*I don't know what I want to do anymore. I just wanna do this.'

*This?'

*You know, drive around, look at stuff. Hang out with you.'

*Sounds like a great way to make a living.'

Benji busied himself with his camera. I could tell he was hurt. He had talked about moving in together before and every time he brought it up I dodged the question. It wasn't that I didn't want to live with Benji, I just wasn't sure how much of him I wanted in my life on a day-to-day basis. I had my own demons to contend with, and couldn't handle his as well. Anyway, I still didn't know what I wanted to do after school. I wasn't even sure I would make it that far. I felt like death was still riding my back.

A car drove past, the driver honking the horn. Benji put away his camera and lay down on the grass. I wondered what I could do to make amends, and decided to tell him about my adventure the previous day. I hadn't been sure about whether I would mention it to Benji, but if I planned on visiting Hank again, which I did, it would be difficult to keep it from him. I picked at my chipped nail polish and tried to act casual.

*Hey, you know that old guy from the other day? That guy called Hank?'

*You mean the creepy guy from Bernie Bernall's place?'

I paused. *I went to see him yesterday.'

Benji sat up. *What do you mean, you went to see him?'

*I went back to his place.'

*What? Why? Why the hell didn't you tell me you were doing that?'

*You were busy getting your teeth whitened.'

Benji got up on his elbows, his face reddening. *What the hell would you do a stupid thing like that for?'

*Why would you give him my phone number?'

*It was a joke! A stupid joke because you like Harold and Maude! You know? And we'd laugh it off and not be having this conversation about you going to some sleazy old dude's place alone. I didn't know you liked Harold and Maude that much. I didn't think you'd go on a fucking date with the guy.'

*It wasn't a date, you dick. He said he had something to give me.'

Benji scoffed. *I'm sure he did.'

*Here. Look.'

I took the heart-shaped jewellery box from my bag and pulled out the tile. Benji snatched it from me and examined it.

*Is this from his bathroom?'

*No. It's from Jayne Mansfield's swimming pool.'

Benji looked at me, disbelieving. *Bullshit.'

*It's true. He worked on her pool when he first came to LA. Be careful with it.'

Benji put the tile in the palm of his hand, almost shaking.

*Can I have it?'

*You've gotta be kidding me.'

I snatched the tile back and put it carefully in the box. Benji lay down again, sulking.

*That was still a stupid thing to do,' he said. *That guy was nuts. The way he freaked out when we knocked on the door. He's hiding something. You said so yourself.'

Benji was right. I could feel it too, something about the way Hank looked at you. It was as if he was always trying to decide whether he could trust you.

*He had a mark on his arm,' I blurted, not sure if I wanted Benji to know but not able to help myself. *It was all blurred and burnt, like someone had tried to take it off with acid. It was near his wrist.'

*Russian mafia.'

*But he didn't have any others. Don't the Russian mafia have tattoos all over their bodies?'

*Maybe he wasn't that high up. Maybe he only made it to single-tattoo status.'

I thought about the size of the mark, the blueness of the ink. *I think he was in a concentration camp.'

*Naaaah. If he was ever in a concentration camp there is no way he would try and get rid of that number. It's like a badge of honour among those people.'

*Those people?'

*Yeah. It's a sympathy ticket.'

I let it slide. Benji was always saying things purely to be controversial. At least, I hoped that's what it was. If he truly believed some of the things he said, then I seriously needed to reassess why I was friends with him.

*Anyway,' I continued, *I was thinking I'd go see him again. He seems lonely.'

*Do what you gotta do, but I don't think the dude's got piles of cash hidden under his mattress, if you know what I mean. When that guy pops off he's leaving a big fat zero, so if you're planning some kind of Anna Nicole Smith agenda, I think you've backed the wrong horse.'

*You're disgusting. It's not like that.'

*Okay. I'll come then.'

I tightened my grip on the grass. Hank had been something I wanted to keep to myself, something just for me, but now I had no way of telling Benji I didn't want him there. I was worried about what he might say, or do. But there was no way I couldn't let him come. Hank would be fine, I figured. He was a tough guy. He could handle a kid like Benji.

*Okay, sure. I mean-you don't have to. It's pretty boring over there.'

*On the contrary, it sounds like there's a mystery afoot.'

I couldn't fault him there. I had to admit I was intrigued by Hank, by what he said and what he didn't say. He seemed eager to have visitors, and at the same time uncomfortable with their presence. I reasoned to myself that we were doing a good deed, that visiting Hank in his old apartment and keeping him company was akin to community service. But in my heart I knew it was the dead cat all over again. Something about Benji's eagerness also made me nervous. I watched him lying on the grass, his eyes closed, body cushioned by the earth beneath him. I worried about Benji, but I wasn't sure whether he was a danger to others, or just himself.

An expensive car pulled up in front of us and a man in a business suit got out. He was followed by a young couple, anticipation etched on their faces. They looked at us curiously as they started to walk up the path and the man in the business suit stared at me with a confused smile.

*Can I help you?' he asked. He looked at Benji lying on the grass, eyes still closed. The couple locked hands nervously.

*No,' I said, as I got up, brushing grass off my jeans. *We were just leaving.'

*Hey,' Benji shouted from the ground. *You interested in buying this place?'

The guy held his girlfriend's hand tighter. *Don't know yet,' he said with a forced smile.

*Oh, this place is great,' Benji said, getting up, and the estate agent smiled with relief. *It's the kind of place you could really lose your head over.'

The agent stopped smiling. The couple looked at him for an explanation and I dragged Benji off, hissing at him to shut up as his laugh echoed down the street.

THIRTEEN.

*You didn't tell me you were bringing him,' Hank scowled, refusing to open the door more than an inch.

Benji saluted like a captain and tried to get his hand through the door, almost getting his fingers chopped off as Hank struggled to close it on him.

*I can't catch a cab every day,' I said. *He gave me a lift. It's cool.'

*Good afternoon Mr Anderson,' Benji beamed. *Lovely day.'

Hank looked over our shoulders. *You got anyone else with ya? Huh? Any more of your little friends?'

Benji looked behind him. A Korean woman stepped out of her apartment and threw a saucepan of hot water onto the concrete.

*There's one!' Benji cried as she scarpered back inside. *No, wait, she's gone.'

I kicked Benji in the ankle. *It's just us,' I assured Hank, *and I got you these.'

I held up a bag from Blockbuster Home Video, filled with tapes. I took one out and shook it at him. *Psycho? I've got Lawrence of Arabia too. The uncut version.'

Hank closed the door in our faces, and for a moment I thought we'd been given our marching orders. Then we heard the sound of a chain unlocking and the door opened. We slithered through the crack Hank had left for us.

*Wipe your feet,' he snarled at Benji, who did a little tap dance on the welcome mat before stepping inside. Hank walked to the kitchen to prepare some tea. I put the bag of tapes on the coffee table and sat on the sofa. Benji slid over and whispered in my ear.

*Looks like you're not the only do-gooder who pays him a visit,' he said, looking around at the spotless apartment. *Jealous?'

*That he's got a cleaning lady? Yeah Benji, I'm heartbroken. I thought you were going to behave yourself today?'

*I am, Hilda,' he said, a serious look on his face. I just want to know what time we give him the sponge bath. Or should I leave for that? Give you both some privacy?'

Benji put his boots on the coffee table. Hank brought the tea over on a tray and stopped suddenly.

*Hey!' he yelled with such force that I jumped.

Benji turned around. *Are you talking to me?'

*Yeah, I'm talking to you. Get your feet off my table.'

*Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought it was a footrest. My mistake.'

If there was any doubt in my mind that it had been a bad idea to bring Benji it had now been confirmed. He seemed intent on behaving badly. I stared at him, implored him with my eyes to be civilised, but he was already helping himself to tea, filling his cup with a ridiculous amount of sugar. As Hank stared at him, incredulous, Benji put in four lumps, then five, then six. He stirred the tea and took a mouthful, closing his eyes as if it were the most glorious thing he had ever tasted.

*Mmmmm,' he moaned. *Now that is a perfect cup of tea. Where do you get your tea, Hank?'

*Supermarket.'