He c.o.c.ked one eyebrow, examining me, and I dropped my gaze. Though I didn't want to care, a part of me was worried about Shea-and about what Fane might do to her or her family.

"And what if Shea can't get herself out?" Zabriel prodded, for he knew me well enough to see past my bitterness and detect my concern.

Without waiting for a response, he slid off the bed and crossed the room to gaze out the window. I followed, mulling over his question. In my mind, Shea deserved whatever retribution Fane would bring down on her, but my heart questioned whether we should step aside and let it happen. Given some of my exploits of late, I desperately hoped I didn't receive the punishment I deserved. Perhaps there was a time and place in this world for mercy.

Though Zabriel did not look at me as I came to his side, I could see his smirk in the reflection of the gla.s.s. I sighed and perused the dramatic view of the city granted by the three-story height of the west turret. From here, the ravine cut by the River Kappa looked like a fissure in the earth, while the white marble bridge that spanned it seemed little more than a poor attempt at a bandage. At last my cousin turned to face me, his smirk replaced by grave determination.

"We need to warn Shea, soon. And I don't think we have much choice but to meet Fane."

I gawked at him, more than a little surprised by his readiness to save Shea. Her betrayal had, after all, led to his injury and capture, and ultimately the end of his adventurous lifestyle. Thanks to her, his wings had been clipped, the independence he had so fiercely sought gone for good.

"Are you sure?" I testily replied.

"Am I sure about what? Meeting Fane? Or warning Shea?"

"Both, I guess." I found his cavalier att.i.tude irritating-I was getting tired of reminding him of the obvious. "Have you forgotten Shea sold you out-I know you said you would have done the same in her position, but still, she almost got us all killed. And Fane is a pirate. Not only have we been told not to leave the Governor's estate, but Luka has made it very clear that everyone who knew you as Pyrite has to believe you're dead."

"Every iron-clad rule begs to be broken."

"And a lot of rule breakers get caught."

Zabriel gritted his teeth, then growled in frustration. "Let me reduce this to a single question, Anya. Do you want to save Shea's life or not? Because if we don't stop Fane, he's not going to give her a lecture about the importance of loyalty-he's going to kill her."

"Well, yes, I suppose I do!" I glared at him, annoyed by his condescending att.i.tude. In truth, I was also ashamed of my own vengeful impulses.

"Then we have to meet with Fane-it's just that simple."

"You may want it to be that simple, but it's not. There are risks here that you're not acknowledging!"

"Then what do you propose?" He carefully enunciated every word, his dark eyes boring into mine of green.

"I don't know, but there has to be another way." I chewed on my lower lip, thinking. "Maybe I should meet with Fane."

Zabriel shook his head. "He won't trust you any more than he does Gwyneth. Believe it or not, but he's not the most reasonable sort. And when he sets his mind to something, he generally succeeds. So if he's out for revenge, Shea's dead unless we shut him down."

He paused, waiting to see if I'd respond, but there was nothing more for me to say. Realizing he'd won, he tapped the windowpane.

"We can make our escape through here. I've been feeling the need to stretch my wings."

I was flabbergasted. "Aren't you forgetting something? I can't fly."

He shrugged. "Then maybe you're the one who shouldn't come along."

I punched him in the shoulder, and he grimaced. "Oh, no, you don't, Zabriel. I want out of here, too. And I'm not about to let you out of my sight-who knows what trouble might erupt."

"Then I'll carry you. I don't need to fly so much as glide. All we have to do is get over that wall."

I examined the stone wall that rose well above the heads of the guards patrolling the grounds down below, my palms beginning to sweat. Weren't things supposed to get easier now that the Queen had arrived?

"Doesn't seem like a good approach to me, Zabriel- If I were to bet, I'd say we'll crash into it. I'd like to see you explain that to Luka."

"Relax, Anya, I can make it work." He rubbed his hands together, clearly relishing the prospect of freedom, however short-lived it might be. "Now, about sending a warning to Shea."

"You're not the only mastermind in the room. I've already got that figured out."

"Really?" He flung himself back on the bed, then turned on his side, propping himself up with one arm. "Let me guess-Officer Matlock? What's going on between the two of you, anyway?"

"Nothing." I knew from the look on Zabriel's face that I'd spoken too quickly, too sharply, too defensively, but I wasn't ready to make my relationship with Tom known. Part of me wanted to nurture it and savor it in private; another part was afraid my cousin wouldn't approve. Hoping to smooth things over, I added an explanation. "He's an acquaintance, and he's useful. He helped Shea and me the last time we were in Tairmor."

He studied me, and a smirk slowly formed. "It appears to me you're in love with Tom."

"I am not in love with Tom!" The moment I denied his a.s.sertion, I knew it was true. My head spun, for my heart had charted its own course without my permission or awareness.

"You really expect me to believe he's just a friend? Because it's perfectly normal to blush red as a berry every time you talk about someone who's just a friend."

My face grew hotter, giving him all the more reason to look smug. Wanting to put him in his place, I fired a shot of my own.

"And I suppose your n.o.ble desire to save Shea has nothing to do with an attraction to her? The sparks that fly between the two of you could send the entire Balsam Forest up in flames!"

He raised one hand in a gesture of surrender. "All right, all right, I'll drop the subject. But if you want my opinion, you could do a lot worse than Officer Matlock."

I grinned, caught off guard by his endors.e.m.e.nt of Tom, and rather pleased by it. Then I raised a question that had been in the back of my mind since I'd first met Fane.

"About the Captain, Zabriel. How did you and he become friends? Didn't you say he tried to kill you when you first met?"

He laughed. "He did at that. It's quite a story, and for once I get to give my version, since he's not here to contradict it." He patted the bed, inviting me to take a seat, and I settled down next to him, eager to learn more about the missing years of his life.

"When I first hit the Warck.u.m Territory at the age of fifteen, I was angry, hurt, confused, and ill-equipped to be on my own. So I threw myself into a rampage of sorts-drinking, stealing, girls, and general all-around troublemaking. It never occurred to me to seek out my father's family-I wanted to spite my mother for treating me like a commodity, and I wanted to spite them for supporting the political union that resulted in my existence. So I decided to become something I knew my mother, at least, would hate."

"A criminal?"

He chuckled. "That wasn't what I was thinking at the time, though she would have hated that, too. No, what I wanted to become was uncontrollable. Only I had no real skills to offer, just a huge chip on my shoulder. And Tairmor isn't the place to engage in that sort of wild behavior-not unless you want a run-in with the Constabularies-so I headed to Sheness, establishing a bit of a name for myself along the way."

"What do you mean you 'established a name' for yourself?"

"I made quite a bit of money riverboat gambling, and became a rather feared highwayman, robbing carriages and the like. And it was shortly after I reached Sheness that I had my run-in with Krylov."

I nodded, for he had already confessed to me the circ.u.mstances of the government official's death.

"Anyway, I was in The Paladin one night, looking to get on a ship and leave the Territory, and ended up in a drunken brawl. Fane was there and saved my pretty face. Guess he got a kick out of a kid like me standing up against some awfully rough sorts. Long story short, I begged him to let me join his crew, but he turned me down flat."

Zabriel stood to once more walk to the window, as though it would afford him a view of the ocean. I waited a moment, then went to join him, eager for him to continue.

"You know me well enough, Anya, to appreciate that I wasn't about to take no for an answer. So I found out where he had berthed his ship, watched him load it up with supplies and crew and then sail out to sea. I waited until he was too far out to return me to sh.o.r.e, then flew out in the dead of night, settling myself in a bunk in the crew's quarters. He went into a bit of a rage when he saw me the next day. Dragged me below deck to his cabin, threatening to rip out my innards unless I told him where I'd stowed away. Only I wasn't a stowaway, I'd come in by air, something I wasn't about to tell him.

"So he's slapping me about, trying to get me to talk, and I start to fight back. That's when he grabbed this blade-" Zabriel held out an arm, motioning with his other hand from his elbow to the tip of his fingers to ill.u.s.trate the length of the dagger "-and took a swipe at me.

"I sidestepped, moving faster than I ever had in my life, and for a moment it looked like he'd sliced only air. But he caught my wing, pinning it to his desk in his downward thrust. I thought his eyeb.a.l.l.s were going to pop right out of his skull when my shroud shattered, and there I was, wings on full display."

"That's how he found out you're Fae?"

Zabriel chuckled. "Yes, indeed. There's nothing quite like discovering you're trapped with a madman awaiting fate's final blow because of an invisible extraneous appendage you once tried to hack off."

I looked away from him, for despite the dramatic story he was telling, the last part of his statement turned my stomach-I'd been there when Zabriel had tried to cut off his own wings. But I didn't say anything, and he picked up where he left off.

"I told Fane to finish the job for me, to just get rid of the b.l.o.o.d.y things." He paused, and I knew this part of the memory was unpleasant even for him. "Nature, I was in pain. I was trying not to move or tug against my wing, but, as it turns out, that's hard to do when you're hyperventilating."

My eyes widened at the vividness of the scene he was painting, and my own heart raced. "What did Fane do?"

"He slapped me-wanted to bring me to my senses, I suppose. Hit me with an open palm, but I swear it's the hardest I've ever been struck in my life, though Luka came close. I was shocked enough to calm down and listen up-or maybe it was his threat that if I didn't stop blubbering, he'd never pull that knife out."

"And you became friends with this man?" I incredulously asked.

"More than friends-partners. He saw my wings as an a.s.set and, based on my actions, credited me with skills, guts, and smarts. I worked with his crew from that day onward, staying at Aunt Roxy's in Sheness when we made port."

A clock chimed somewhere in the house, and Zabriel glanced at the position of the sun.

"Almost time for the dance we call dinner," he teased, for the evening meals were extremely formal and not necessarily pleasant. But then, very few aspects of the Queen's visit to Tairmor had turned out to be pleasant.

I sighed, not wanting to leave him. "I suppose I'd better go to my quarters and freshen up."

"I'll stop by and be your escort. Unless you have plans with Tom?"

I grabbed a pillow off his bed and flung it at him, then hastened down the winding stairs to the second floor. I almost didn't feel like going to dinner-Zabriel had given me enough to chew on. And I couldn't shake the feeling that meeting Fane was a bad idea. But whether seeing the Captain was truly necessary or not had become a bit irrelevant. Zabriel wanted to escape the confines of the mansion, rub elbows with his old life, and test the limits of Luka's authority. And if he sensed my reluctance, he'd simply go without me.

Chapter Twenty-Three.

CONNECTIONS, ELEMENTAL AND OTHERWISE.

I returned to my bedroom after dinner and waited until the servants had been dismissed for the day and the mansion had quieted to leave for my rendezvous with Tom at the aviary. Though the mere thought of his smile and his touch set off flutters in my stomach, giving me reason enough to want to see him, Zabriel had correctly discerned my intent to seek the Constabulary's help in delivering a message to Shea. I had pulled on a tunic over a pair of leggings, desiring a break from the skirts and dresses I'd been wearing of late. Back in Chrior, I'd worn dresses only on special occasions; I'd probably donned more gowns since coming to stay in the mansion than in the totality of my previous life.

I hastened down the main staircase to the first floor, then on through the corridors to the solarium and the back door that led into the gardens. To my relief, I saw no night staff on duty, nor was the exit locked, raising the suspicion in my mind that Tom had cleared the way for me.

The air outside was warm but fresh, and the sky was relatively clear, allowing the moon and stars to shine through the shifting cloud cover. I hastened along the path through the gardens, my heart for once light and happy. Today had been a good day, all things considered. I'd seen Fi and Frat, had an interesting talk with Zabriel, and now was going to see Tom-for the first time not betrothed. I ran my tongue over my lips, antic.i.p.ating his kiss, and spread my arms wide, wanting to capture this moment, this feeling. I was in a place as close to Nature as could be found within Tairmor, with soft gra.s.s beneath my feet, the scent of flowers in the air, and trees that rustled in the gentle breeze; and I would soon step into the embrace of the young man who made me feel fully alive.

"Anya," Tom called upon my approach, stepping out of the shadows near the aviary, a quilt draped over one arm. "I was starting to think I'd be spending another night alone, though that would admittedly be less painful than some of our encounters."

He grinned and rubbed the back of his head, playing the blow I had given him for all it was worth.

"I have already apologized for that, Officer Matlock." I crossed my arms over my chest in mock offense. "To be fair, I thought you were going to arrest me."

"To be fair, I didn't know what kind of self-defense you'd been taught, or I wouldn't have been such an easy victim. But I've since learned that it's best to stay on your good side."

He opened the aviary door and gestured for me to enter.

"Who said you were on my good side?" I teased as I walked past.

"You're here, aren't you? Besides, our last form of physical contact was of a far less violent nature."

Hoping to hide my blush, I began to climb the winding stairway, Tom a step behind. When we reached the top, he spread the quilt out on the platform, then settled on top of it.

"Care to join me?" he asked, giving the blanket a pat.

I sat beside him, nervousness suddenly p.r.i.c.kling my skin at the thought of what I needed to ask him-and the best way to get him to agree.

"This is nice," he commented, stretching out on his back to gaze at the stars. With an expectant look, he extended an arm toward me, and I lay down with my head resting on his shoulder, one hand on his chest, feeling the comforting rhythm of his heart.

"So tell me, what do Fae think of the night sky?" he softly asked, folding his arm around me.

"What do you mean? The sky is the sky, albeit a vast and beautiful part of the world."

He laughed. "I think you may have just answered my question."

"I don't understand. What do humans think of it?"

"Well, we look up at the stars and see constellations-groups of stars that form the shapes of objects or animals or even heroes from our legends. And we've learned to use them for guidance in navigating across the land and sea."

"We, too, pick out shapes and designs. But we don't navigate by the stars. We find our way based on our senses and with guidance from our elements."

His fingers brushed through my auburn hair for a moment; then he made another observation.

"We also picture a paradise somewhere out there among the stars, a future home for us after we die."

"Really? I've never heard of such a thing."

"It's part of our religion. When we die, our bodies are returned to the soil, but our spirits are taken to a paradise far away from earthly cares."

I pondered what he was telling me for a moment, for I knew very little about human religion. But my curiosity was piqued.

"I've seen churches in Tairmor. Is this moving of spirits to paradise the reason you need churches?"

He laughed, and I could feel his chest vibrating pleasingly with the sound. "We don't need churches. But churches are where we gather to worship our G.o.d."

"And this G.o.d lives among the stars?"

"More or less, and we will live there, too, someday."

I pushed up on my elbow to stare down at him. "That's a very strange idea."

"Perhaps." He stroked my cheek, then let his fingers trail slowly down my neck, sending a shiver all the way to my toes. Clearly enjoying the effect his touch was having on me, he smiled. "But being here with you is all the paradise I need right now."

I playfully slapped his hand away. "That's because paradise is all around us. Fae have no need of a future paradise-our elements connect us here and now to the spirit of Nature that intertwines and guides all living things."