Heavenly Soul - 21 A Honest Confession
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21 A Honest Confession

Finally released from his previous constraints and able to freely flex his spiritual strength again, Qinghe felt liberated.

Now as he and Wei Xiang walked silently towards his room side by side, Qinghe thought of how the other man was always teasing him but also helped wordlessly whenever he needed. And for some reason, Qinghe's thoughts wandered to when his master had incorrectly taken them for lovers. Did they really look that…intimate? What would Wei Xiang even be like as a lover?

Qinghe sneakily took a peek at his companion.

The Sentinel really did look very nice, his smooth and warm skin inviting touch. Wei Xiang was half a head taller and more muscled than Qinghe himself, his every movement carelessly regal and his expressions open and vivid with just a hint of wickedness. His eyes sparkled with sharp intelligence and mischief. And spending time with him was surprisingly relaxing.

He would be a good choice for a lover.

Qinghe turned his head away, his face suddenly feeling too hot. What was he even thinking? He was a Sentinel sent to monitor him! But then…why would he treat him so unnecessarily well?

He was used to always taking care of others but had never let others take care of him, so Qinghe was a bit conflicted.

All this time, Wei Xiang had been studying Qinghe carefully. Though he couldn't read much from that frozen face of his, he could still tell Qinghe was embarra.s.sed when he turned away with his ears dyed pink.

Wei Xiang had already decided to slowly woo Feng Qinghe to become his lover. So when the impulse to tease him came, he happily gave in.

Leaning close, Wei Xiang whispered into Qinghe's flushed ear, "Your face looks somewhat red, did I not block the wind sufficiently?"

Feeling the warm breath fanning over his ear, Qinghe felt gooseb.u.mps. Irritable at being caught off-guard, he answered haughtily, "Hmph. Your service was adequate."

Wei Xiang's voice dropped an octave and grew suggestive, "Then is there any other way you'd like me to service you?"

Qinghe's face burned blood red at the thoughts the smooth and low voice evoked. Dammit! Why did his mind nosedive into the gutter?! Give me back my pure thoughts!

Seeing the look on his face, Wei Xiang finally let up and released a satisfied laugh.

Qinghe elbowed the smug b.a.s.t.a.r.d, hard. "Are you done playing with me?" he asked, his expression an interesting combination of embarra.s.sment and fury.

"Oh, I haven't even begun," came Wei Xiang's cheeky reply.

Having had enough of being teased, Qinghe huffed and sped up, almost running to his room with his cheeks still flaming.

What was wrong with him today? There were countless people who had tried to get a rise out of him over the three decades or so he had lived, but never had he reacted so obviously. He felt off-center, his mind being a.s.saulted by strange thoughts that he didn't know how to deal with.

But Qinghe felt inexplicably safe with showing his true emotions to Wei Xiang unreservedly. Why and from when had he started trusting him so much? They'd only met days before!

Wei Xiang quickly followed behind. Thinking that he might have pushed him a bit too far, he apologized, "I'm sorry, so don't be mad anymore, okay?"

Pursing his lips, Qinghe admonished, "You should stop saying things like that, they can be easily misunderstood. So don't say what you don't mean."

After pausing for a moment, Wei Xiang asked, "Then what if I mean it?"

Qinghe blinked. "Mean what?"

He patiently explained, "What if I am really attracted to you? What if I said I like you and want you to be my lover?"

Tilting his head, Qinghe asked confused, "You…want us to be lovers?" His heart was hammering the inside of his chest, as if trying to get out and fall into the other man's hands.

"Yes, if you're okay with that." Wei Xiang hadn't wanted to ask him so soon, but he wasn't the type to keep his feelings to himself and dally for too long either.

"I…I don't know," Qinghe was shaken. He didn't know what to feel. He had just been thinking that Wei Xiang would be a good lover. Though they hadn't known each other for long, he had still left such an impression on him.

Should he agree or ask for time to consider it? But what if he hesitated too much and lost the chance? Why would anyone even want someone with such a warped personality as him? Wouldn't a nice and lovely, caring person be more suitable? He…didn't feel worthy.

A warm hand patted his head. "If you don't want to, don't worry about it."

Something in Qinghe's chest clenched at hearing the care in his voice.

"Why did you choose me of all people?" This was what he really wanted to know.

Wei Xiang's answer was simple, "Because thinking about having you always by my side makes me happy."

And wasn't it the same for him? Wasn't that reason enough?

Qinghe looked up into the other man's eyes and said softly, "Okay."

Wei Xiang's heart thumped. "You agree?"

"Yes, but…I have conditions."

"Tell me," Wei Xiang leaned forward, looking at him intently.

Qinghe felt his face starting to heat up again. "I'm not comfortable with…very intimate contact."

His lips curling up at the nervousness in Qinghe's voice, Wei Xiang clarified, "You mean s.e.xual intercourse?"

"…Yes." His voice sounded strained and Qinghe felt guilty. Was it really alright for him to withhold himself like this? Weren't lovers supposed to share everything?

But Qinghe was overthinking things. Wei Xiang agreed easily, "Okay."

"You're really alright with it?" Qinghe felt doubtful.

While chuckling at his newfound lover's adorably befuddled expression, Wei Xiang finally understood the cause for Qinghe's unease.

"It seems you have the wrong idea about what being lovers means."

"Oh? Then tell me." Qinghe felt like he should be taking notes.

"When two people like each other and make the decision to become lovers, they make their own rules. We can proceed as fast or as slow as we want. The point is to enjoy our time together, support each other, and only do things we are comfortable with. We can start with only holding hands for now. If that's still too much, then we don't have to do even that. I don't mind what we're doing as long as you're with me. All that matters is that you don't force yourself to do something you don't want to. We have all the time in the world to explore this at our own pace, alright?"

Qinghe nodded contemplatively. It turned out his new lover was so kind and sensible when he wasn't gleefully pus.h.i.+ng his b.u.t.tons.

"So what should we do now?" Qinghe didn't know if being lovers meant there would be changes in how they should behave.

"What do you want to do?" Wei Xiang asked back. Seeing Qinghe still confused, he clarified, "Is there a specific way you'd like to use your privilege as my lover?"

Qinghe seriously thought about it. Was there anything particular he wanted to do with Wei Xiang?

Thinking about it, he had many ideas. They could go play and bathe together in the stream. Whenever Qinghe went to gather materials, hunt for treasures or fight beasts, he could take Wei Xiang with him. They could go exploring ancient caves or deserted underground cities. Or he could instead help Wei Xiang with his work, like finding and capturing criminals or locating clues. They could do anything and it would be fun.

He could share his entire life with him like this.

The thought overwhelmed Qinghe. All of this was happening too suddenly, he had no time to prepare for it. Just when he was about to panic, a gentle kiss landed on his forehead and startled him out of his thoughts. Qinghe felt like basking in the soft, brief touch. He had never felt anyone's lips on him like this before and felt it was quite an intimate and novel experience.

"Stop thinking so much, you're only frightening yourself."

Qinghe forced himself to calm down. He'd really been off-balance since the time he got poisoned. He needed to take some time and compose himself and sort all his thoughts.

"What's wrong?" Wei Xiang asked gently.

Well, he was his lover now, so he should probably tell him. "I'm overwhelmed. It's all too much too soon."

Wei Xiang had expected as much. "Come, let's relax for a bit." Saying so, he led his nervous lover by the hand until they reached the stream in the backyard. Wei Xiang helped Qinghe remove his shoes and outer robe, much like they had done the night he rescued him.

Qinghe was made to sit on the bank with his feet in the water. His mood immediately brightened. Wei Xiang sat behind Qinghe, his legs to either side of him and his front pressed to Qinghe's back. Feeling that it was not enough, he wrapped his arms around the slender body in an embrace. The pleasant scent of mint wafted off Qinghe, as calm and soothing as his presence was to Wei Xiang.

"Is this okay?" he didn't forget to ask.

Qinghe considered for a second before nodding. Physical intimacy like this with someone other than the twins was not something he'd ever thought he would be able to enjoy. It was a rare treat and a very welcome one at that.

Wei Xiang's body was warm and very comfortable, and being enfolded completely like this gave Qinghe the feeling of being cherished and protected. Though he was sure he could handle himself now, it still felt nice to feel this security. Qinghe was content in the knowledge that not only would Wei Xiang not let others hurt him, he would also not let Qinghe hurt himself either.

He leaned his head back against the warm chest behind him and sighed in contentment. The scent of his lover encased him, a unique mixture of warm metal and woodsmoke. Relaxing, he slowly started getting used to the idea of now having someone he could depend on. The feeling was oh-so-strange and wonderful.

They stayed like that for the better part of the hour, slowly enjoying each other's company.

"If you ever need my help, don't hesitate to ask me," Wei Xiang said gravely.

Raising an eyebrow, Qinghe looked up at his lover's face and spoke calmly, "I can protect myself now. I think I can be of more use to you when it comes to connections and finding people and…some other things. So don't underestimate me and ask for help with anything you can't handle."

Seeing his little lover's confident and somewhat smug expression, Wei Xiang could only lean back and laugh in delight.

The sound warmed Qinghe, making him want to join in just for the sheer fun of it. Hearing his unrestrained laughter made the world seem like a brighter, livelier place.

Completely comfortable now, Qinghe extended his hands upwards and locked them behind Wei Xiang's head, his body arching backwards as he looked up at his joyful face. Hmm, Wei Xiang looked so nice when he was happy. He should always be happy like this.

And if someone ever tried to hurt his precious lover…

Qinghe's lips quirked up in a soft smile, but his eyes were as sharp and cold as blades of ice.