"It's great. Pretty rewarding. I had no idea that the horses could be such a deep connection for some of those kids."

"Wait until you've done it for a while. The growth with the kids is awesome. I'm hoping to expand the program."

Maddie ran up next to her mom and gave Tyler a hug around his waist, surprising Jamie. "Thank you, Tyler. I had a lot of fun."

"Me too, kiddo." He ruffled the top of her hair. "See you tomorrow, and then for your riding lesson, and Saturday for horsemanship?" he asked Jamie.

"I'll be here." She smiled and grabbed Maddie's hand as they walked to the car.

"He's so cool, Mom. He let me brush his horse, Buster. But one of his horses died the other day like Daddy did." Maddie got into the car.

Jamie opened up her door. "What do you mean?"

"His one horse Flame was really, really old and he had something in his legs where it was hard for him to walk any more, and the vet came and gave him a shot so he could go to heaven."

"Oh. How sad." She knew how hard it must have been on Tyler to have one of his horses put down. Surely it hadn't been the first time because the guy had grown up around them, but Jamie had seen him with his animals and witnessed the love he had for them. She doubted it had been easy.

"Do you think horses go to heaven like Daddy did?"

Jamie nodded. "Sure I do."

"Maybe Daddy is riding one right now. Wouldn't that be neat? When I feel sad about Daddy, I'm going to think about him riding a horse in heaven and I think I'll feel better. A super shiny white horse with long silver mane and tail, that's the kind of horse Daddy has in Heaven, and he prances."

"Like a horse for a king or queen," Jamie said.

"Yeah. That's perfect, Mom. I still miss Daddy, but sometimes it's hard for me to remember him until I look at a picture of him. Do you miss him?"

"I do. A lot. I like your idea though. I could see Daddy riding the white and silver horse in Heaven and having a lot of fun." Jamie bit down hard on the side of her mouth, working to keep her emotions at bay. Maddie didn't talk often about Nate, but Jamie's therapist had told her to expect that Maddie would have questions and want to talk about him. As hard as it might be for Jamie to do so with her, she knew she needed to be strong, honest, and supportive. It was no time to reminisce and be melancholy.

"I think I'll call Uncle David and tell him about it."

Jamie cringed. "Why don't we wait to do that? Maybe we can let it be our special vision of Daddy."

Maddie looked out the window and didn't say anything for a minute. Jamie almost took the words back, realizing that she shouldn't try and get in the way of Maddie's feelings and relationship with her aunt and uncle, but at the same time knowing what jerks they really were. Eventually Maddie would likely discover that fact herself. People didn't change. "I like that Mom. We'll keep it our secret, like Daddy has a secret horse world in Heaven on Prancer. That's the name of his horse."

Jamie smiled and nodded. "I think that is wonderful. I love it."

"Maybe we could draw pictures with Daddy on Prancer in Heaven."

"Maybe we could." Feeling better, Jamie couldn't wait to get home, get everyone dinner, and take a long hot bath.

Turning down her street, her stomach sank. There were two police cars parked in front of her house. Oh no. Was she in trouble over the bounced checks? No. Oh no. What if something happened to Dorothy or Nora?

"Mommy why are there police cars here?" Maddie asked as Jamie pulled into her driveway and spotted Nora chatting wildly to the police.

"Stay here, honey." Jamie jumped out and approached the group. "What's going on?"

Wild-eyed and hands flailing, Nora was carrying on in Spanish to one of the cops who seemed to understand her as he stood there nodding his head. He held up a hand to her and turned to Jamie. "Dorothy Evans is your mother-in-law?"

"Yes. Why? What's happened?"

"Your housekeeper called us and said she got out of the house and that she has mental problems. Is this true?"

"Oh, my God. Yes. If she's lost, she won't know how to get home. We have to find her."

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN.

Danielle Two hours before Mark was supposed to pick her up, Danielle practically had every piece of clothing she owned spread out on her bed. She tried a handful of things on. None of them made her happy. Some made her look fat, others slutty, others like a church lady, others like she was heading to the office, and others that screamed, Married! One thing was for sure, Danielle needed a new wardrobe. She flopped down on her blue-and-white toile-patterned comforter, right on top of the pile of clothes, closed her eyes and, with a big sigh, wondered what in the hell she was doing. Having nothing to wear had to be a sign. It just had to. At forty-seven, she had no business going out on a date with her high school sweetheart. Maybe if she didn't think of it as a date, but rather a dinner with an old friend, that would make it easier to find something to wear. She certainly never had this problem when she was going to dinner with her friends. Yes, think of Mark as an old friend. Sure.

"Hey, Mom." Cassie came in the room.

Danielle opened her eyes. "Hey. What's up?"

"Do you have any money? I'm going to the movies with some friends tonight."

Danielle propped up onto her elbows. "Yes, I have money but maybe we should back track here. How about the idea of asking me if it's okay for you to go the movies with your friends, and how about you telling me what you're going to do for me to earn the money I will consider giving you for the movies. I notice you still haven't made much progress on the job hunt."

Cassie put her hands on her hips and gave her mother a blank look.

"I'm all ears."

"Mom."

"Yes?"

"Come on." Cassie tossed back her strawberry blonde hair.

She sighed. "Here's the deal. Yes, you can go to the movies and, yes, I will give you the money, but tomorrow I planned to go to the nursery and pick up some flowers to plant in the pots on the front porch so you can do that with me and that's how you'll pay me back. Then I suggest you drive into town and pick up and fill out as many job apps as you can."

"Mom," she whined.

"It's not negotiable. You and me-nursery and then gardening. I'll even give you a little extra and why don't we get some lunch together, then you can go job hunting on a full stomach."

"I guess so."

"My purse is on my dresser. You can take twenty."

"I need a little more for gas."

Danielle sighed and sat up. "Fine. Take forty and we'll negotiate a few more chores tomorrow."

"Thanks. Hey, what's up with the clothes?"

Danielle picked at her fingernails and stood up. "Nothing. I'm going out to dinner and I can't find anything to wear."

Cassie smiled. "You have a date, don't you?"

"No. No, I don't have a date. He's an old friend."

"No, he isn't. Shannon told me. He's that doctor and you guys went out in high school."

"Where is Shannon?"

"She said she was going to the farmer's market. Don't change the subject. It's so a date, Mom. Sweet." Cassie began picking up articles of clothing and quickly discarded several pieces, shaking her head. "No, no, no. Oooh. This is nice, Mom. Really nice. Wear this." She held up a slinky black dress. One that Danielle deemed as over the top. Much too sexy.

"Really? Why that one?" The dress was pretty. She'd bought it during the mourning process after the divorce-on a whim. She'd passed a boutique in St. Helena and saw it on a mannequin. She'd felt so ugly and undesirable, and the dress screamed, Take me and I'll make you pretty again! She'd plunked down the three hundred dollars for it on the one card that Al had forgotten to cancel. Oops. She'd taken it home, hung it up, and let it sit for what was now over two years. It was a wrap dress with a slight ruffling that followed the low-cut neckline. Made of silk. Very chic, but also hmm, maybe a bit too low-cut.

"It's hot, that's why."

"I don't know that hot is what I'm going for."

Cassie's mouth dropped. "Don't be lame, Mom. Of course hot is what you're going for. Now put it on."

She listened to her teenaged daughter and put the dress on, because before Cassie had come into the room, Danielle had been completely lost and confused.

"See. That is way hot."

Danielle looked in the full-length mirror in her bathroom. Not bad. "Don't you think it's a little you know, I mean my cleavage is kind of out there?"

"No." Cassie rolled her eyes. "Jeez, Mom, you've got great boobs. I say when you got 'em, flaunt 'em."

"Nice, Cass. That's real special."

Cassie shrugged. "I didn't get so lucky. Must've inherited Grandma Bastillia's boobs. I have to wear padded bras to even look like I have any."

"You have a beautiful figure, Cassandra."

"I don't have boobs."

"Good news for you then is that they will never sag."

"I know because I am going to have a boob job when I turn eighteen."

"No, you're not."

She nodded. "Yes I am. I was thinking, too, that I'd have a little tattoo of a hummingbird right over my areola. Get it? Don't you think that would be cute?"

Danielle stared at her and debated this one in her mind for about five seconds. She did not have time for the argument and went with the old pick and choose your battles mantra. The boob job talk with the nursing hummingbird would have to take a rain check. "What shoes do I wear with it, and should I wear jewelry, too?"

Cassie helped her mom finish picking out the outfit for the evening and even helped her with her hair and makeup. Danielle was taking one last look in the mirror and when the doorbell rang, figured she might be able to pull this off.

Cassie ran down the stairs, beating her to the front door. "Gotta get a look at the goods."

"Be nice."

She turned back and smiled at her mom as she swung the door open. There was Mark. He looked handsome and almost as nervous as Danielle was. He wore a pair of dark slacks, a striped aqua and grey button down, and a dark grey sports coat.

"You look great," Danielle said.

"And you, you're gorgeous."

Cassie cleared her throat. Danielle quickly introduced her and told her to have fun at the movies and not to be out past midnight. "Right. Now you kids have a good time, too," Cassie said.

Danielle shook her head and walked with Mark to his car-a cream colored Audi sedan. She knew the car would get Cassie's approval and she was sure her daughter was watching from behind the living room drapes. Mark opened up her door and before long they were on their way to La Toque in the quaint town of Rutherford.

The restaurant was stunning, reminding Danielle of a French country inn or elegant barn with its large wood framed chairs covered in brocade cushions, an enormous stone fireplace on one wall, and in the center stood a refectory table with a lovely, sprawling floral arrangement filled with lavender and purple calla lilies.

Mark ordered a superb bottle of champagne and they agreed on mussels in an orange salsa broth for appetizers. He toasted her with his glass of champagne, holding it up in the candlelight, his blue eyes shining and she remembered getting lost in those eyes as a girl. They were still damn easy to get lost in. "To you, to old friends and loves, and new beginnings."

They clinked glasses and took a sip. After a few more sips, conversation turned back to those good old days. "You know, I thought about you a lot over the years," he said.

"You did?"

He nodded. "Why wouldn't I? You were my first. My first love and my first." He waved his hand in a rolling position.

This admission took Danielle by surprise. Mark had been on the football team, the academic decathlon and student council. Girls loved him. She loved him. "Me? What about Catherine Ketchum?"

He shook his head. "No."

"But she told everyone..."

"Cross my heart. Scout's honor."

"Then, Rachel Whiting? Not her, either?"

"Not her, either. It was you, Danielle." He took her hand.

"I, well, why didn't you tell me that then? You knew you were my first."

He shrugged. "Stupid young guy stuff. Me playing big man."

"Huh."

He nodded. "Have you thought about me?"

"Yes, of course. We did date for what? Almost an entire year and obviously a lot happened during that year." She smiled. He smiled back at her making her stomach turn over and sending electricity down her back. How odd that the feelings you could have as a sixteen-year-old-particularly that feeling of lust-could be exactly the same some thirty years later.

"What happened to us?" he asked.

"If I remember correctly, you went away to college and I stayed here and was a senior in high school. That's what happened. Then your parents moved away from Napa and I guess we kind of drifted apart from each other."

"Right."