They decided to leave after they spent an hour chatting. Regardless how close they were, they could not take up too much time for a person in recovery.

“Alright, see you later then, Banba.” Lin said as he opened the door to leave. “Tell me if you need anything. I'll bring whatever you need from the office.”

“A bat.”

“No.”

Banba pouted at Lin's quick response.

“Then get me a ball and a glove.”

“No.”

Lin could not bring him his baseball gear.

“You're forbidden to practice swinging and bouncing the ball off the walls until you're fully recovered, so just sit tight and behave yourself.”

“I agree.” s.h.i.+gematsu nodded. “What if your wounds open again? You're going to be cut off from baseball until you're well.”

“...Okaaaay.” Banba replied reluctantly before waving at them from his bed. “Thanks, you guys.”

Afterwards, the three of them left the room.

“I'm pretty happy to see him like that.” Lin said as they walked down the hospital hallway. “He looked better than I thought he was going to be.”

“Yeah, same here.” s.h.i.+gematsu said in agreement.

“As soon as I came in, he started complaining about not being able to watch baseball games and asked me to have him change rooms.”

They chuckled.

“That sure sounds like him, I tell ya.”

“But I bet even a hospital can't cure his baseball lunacy.”

s.h.i.+gematsu and Genzo seemed to be relieved Banba was in high spirits. Even with their harsh comments, in the end the people around Banba truly cared for him.

Genzo suggested they all go out to eat together. He was willing to treat them. Lin and s.h.i.+gematsu took him up on the offer.

“Ah.”

Just as they were leaving the facility, Lin stopped, having remembered something.

“What is it?” s.h.i.+gematsu looked over at him. “Did you need something?”

“...I forgot to give him the mentaiko.”

The two c.o.c.ked their heads in confusion.

“I got him a get-well gift. I had some leftovers.”

And he forgot to give them to Banba. They were still in Lin's bag.

“I'm going to quickly go over and give them to him. Go ahead without me.”

Lin said as he turned on his heel.

Even if he gave him the mentaiko, he would not be able to eat it while hospitalized. But Lin wanted to bring it to him anyway. He could not think of anything else that would bring him more joy.

Maybe he would get better faster by looking at it. Lin chuckled to himself when he considered the silly thought. But this is him after all; it's possible.

Lin retraced his steps to get back to the private room. He ascended to the second floor in the ward and headed towards Banba's room.

However, he was unable to enter. Just as he was reaching for the door, Lin stilled just like he did earlier.

“...s.h.i.+t.”

He heard Banba's voice from inside the room.

Lin could tell even from the other side of the threshold.

Banba was crying.

“...!”

Lin unconsciously pulled his hand back.

He could not speak. He could not make a noise. He felt like he should not enter. Lin held his breath to hide his presence.

Banba muttered another curse once again. Lin heard him sniffle too. It was apparent he was sobbing.

Lin was in complete disbelief that Banba was crying. He was always so cheerful and always had a gentle expression. So hearing such a broken voice from him shook him.

Lin stood in front of the door, unsure what to do.

He suddenly felt tears br.i.m.m.i.n.g in his eyes.

Memories from a year ago played in the back of his head.

Lin had infiltrated his boss's office to avenge his sister. However, he had gotten overpowered. His sister had been killed and he had been outwitted by the organization, and he had been powerless. He felt so miserable, unsightly, and pathetic that he could not stand it. The bitterness hurt so much he could not hold back the tears.

Banba had to be feeling the same right now, just like how he felt when he failed to take his revenge. He must be stricken with grief.

As if he's doing alright. I was stupid. Lin grimaced. What have I been saying? There's no way he would be alright. He's just putting up a facade, and I didn't see through it.

Lin had lived with him and had intended to get to know him well. He let himself believe Banba was not weak, even though everyone could be.

Lin deeply regretted it now. For mentioning Bessho's name to Banba and for bringing up his attempt at revenge. His apathetic comments had to have hurt Banba.

I'm a failure as a teammate.

Lin tightened up his fists, reflecting back on his incompetence.

He thought back to what it was like back then. A year ago he got his friends in the Ramens, starting with Banba, to lend him their strength and they managed to avenge his sister.

But what could we do for Banba now?

The person who murdered Banba's father was no longer in this world. They could not take revenge. For the rest of his life, Banba will have to live with this regret.

Lin could not think of anything he could say to help him.

He wanted to leave him alone right now. He knew that he should. There was nothing he could do for Banba right now.

I didn't see anything. I didn't hear anything.

Lin told himself as he silently turned his back to the door. It was shameful how he was powerless to help in any way.

Bottom of the Ninth Inning Banba instantly felt the silence in the room as soon as Lin, s.h.i.+gematsu and Genzo left. He became lost in his own thoughts in the desolate room.

Without meaning to, his train of thought drifted over to the other night.

‘You've always been putting the blame on someone else. You killed because of work, because of the job, because someone else asked you to.'

‘You found any reason to excuse yourself about becoming a hitman - to kill Bessho, or to put your father at rest by killing Bessho - and in doing so, you emotionally distanced yourself from taking responsibility.'

He could not get what Masataka told him out of his head.

‘Come on, Zenji. Isn't that what you're doing? You need to admit you're a murderer already. That's what it means to have this job.'

He did not want to admit it, but what he had said was true. Banba had been using his t.i.tle as a hitman as a pardon. He had been telling himself this whole time that he did not want to be a murderer, ever since the day he became a hitman. He convinced himself that he had to kill for the job. He did not feel any sense of reward for this line of work, and he was not proud of it. He drew a line in his rationale, causing him to believe someone could forgive him for what he had done. He tried to escape it - from his heavy conscience on the crimes he committed.

He killed people, but he was a good person. He convinced himself that this was true. He was unable to acknowledge that he was a criminal. And so he had been thrown into disarray when he realized he had the gnawing desire to kill Bessho when he finally confronted him - that he had the urge to kill someone.

In the end, he did not have the resolve to do it. He lacked the conviction to plummet into h.e.l.l as a villain. And he had spent these past thirteen years duped by his own naivete.

“What have I been doin' all this time…?”

He muttered, folding in on himself.

He had been foolish. Just what had he been doing this whole time without fully understanding everything? It was only natural Masataka had been fed up with him.

Banba had thought hitmen and murderers were different. However, Masataka said they were one in the same. Their way of thinking may be different, but they were all of the same stripe.

The j.a.panese sword and Niwaka mask Masataka had brought him were kept with his belongings in the closet. He must have come to the hospital to give those to Banba to make him reconsider his future plans moving forward. The issue was one Banba could not avoid.

What should he do after this?

He had originally planned to quit being a hitman after taking his revenge. But he had failed in doing so. Then should he continue being a hitman? But he could not imagine continuing to be the great Niwaka Samurai now that he lost his sole purpose in life and had made a fool of himself. Then should he quit? Even if he were to retire, he would still be in the same boat. Could he manage to live the rest of his life with these shameful feelings?

Banba pondered to himself as he glanced over to the closet. After being seen as weak, perhaps it would be better for him to take that j.a.panese sword and cut his stomach open rather than live with shame for the rest of his life. Maybe then he could atone for all the lives he had taken.

Those irresponsible thoughts came to his mind.

He felt awfully exhausted. He wanted to be devoid of all thoughts right now - and afterwards, and even further ahead.

Banba decided to rest a little. He turned onto his side and tried to fall asleep when someone interrupted him. He heard a knock on the door, so he replied.

It was already past three in the afternoon. He figured it was time for the doctors and nurses to make their rounds, but that was not it.

“Hey.”

He saw a gaudy-looking ma.s.s of hair when the door opened - it was Enokida.

He must have come to see him. In all honesty, Banba did not feel like talking to anyone at the moment. But he had to. He rose up and forced a smile. “I got a lot of visitors today.”

“Oh? Did everyone else already drop by?”

Enokida asked as he glanced around the room. When he spotted the fruit Genzo had brought, he smiled and joked. “Sorry I came empty-handed.”

“I don't mind. Thanks for comin' by.”

Banba did not need any get-well gifts. The sentiment was enough. Right now he wanted to be left alone, but even then he was grateful that everyone worried about him.

“I got information for you instead though.”

Banba tilted his head, confused when Enokida boastfully smiled at him. He wondered what he wanted to tell him. He did not recall asking him for anything. “...Information?”

“Eitarou Bessho's still alive.”

Banba's eyes shot open wide at that statement.

He was shocked. Why would Enokida know about Bessho? Who did he hear it from? Did he look into it himself, and how much did he know? Banba had a pile of questions, but none of those mattered at the present moment.

More than anything-

“...Is that true?”

That was the question he wanted to know the answer to the most.

Bessho was alive. His father's murderer whom he thought was dead was still alive.

Banba stared at him in disbelief.

“Sorry.” Enokida shrugged. “I have a general rule to not look into my friends' personal history, but there were special circ.u.mstances this time around.”

Enokida took a seat in the rounded chair and explained.

“There was another man there when you met up with Bessho, right? He was a bit of a stern-looking Asian foreigner, right?”

Banba nodded his head readily.

Another man had bust in just as Bessho was about to kill him. Banba did not get a good look at him though, so he could not tell if he was foreign or not. But the person Enokida was referring to had to be him.

“I was the one to tell him where Bessho was at.”

“...What?” Banba only grew more confused. He frowned further. “What do ya mean?”

“That man was one of my clients. He asked me to find Bessho's whereabouts.” Enokida explained frankly. “When I looked into it, I saw that you and Bessho had some history. So I figured you wanted to find Bessho, so I found your guys' location from your cell phone.”

And Enokida had told his client their location provided by the signal of Banba's cell phone. That was why that man showed up at the apartment.

“...Alright. I get it.”

“Because of that, he ended up getting in your way. So I'm sorry for that.”

Enokida expressed meekly, quite unlike himself.

“It's fine.” Banba shook his head. “If that fella didn't show up, Bessho would have killed me.”

The man did not get in the way. The opposite, in fact. Enokida had indirectly saved his life.

At any rate, Banba understood the situation. But that was not what he wanted to know. He returned to the main topic of interest. “So how is Bessho still alive?”

“I'll explain everything from the beginning.”

Banba nodded and listened intently to what Enokida had to say.

“Bessho originally worked for Murder Inc.”

Enokida had been providing shocking revelations since the start. Banba was unaware of this. He did not expect him to have been a hitman under a hitman contracting company.

“He was apparently a very skilled and talented employee, but he quit thirteen years ago. He had just suddenly vanished one day. Then after some time pa.s.sed, Bessho had attempted a robbery and committed murder, and he got arrested. I'm sure you know which one it was.”

Banba knew full well which one it was. Bessho had broke into their home and had murdered his father. And he was released from prison thirteen years after his arrest.

“The company immediately began to make preparations as soon as they heard when he would be released from prison. Murder Inc had sent that Asian guy to f.u.kuoka with the task to kill Bessho, similar to what happened with Saitou.”

Enokida continued with his explanation.

“But Murder Inc also had a lot of questions they needed answers to. Like why he had betrayed the company and if he had sold any information about them. So he should not be killed right away. I'm pretty sure he's being interrogated right now.”

“That means-” Bessho was not dead. In other words, Banba still had the chance to take his revenge. “...I can still kill him?”

“Yes you can.”

Enokida's information was always accurate. There was no room for doubt.

Banba could kill Bessho. He could avenge his father. He balled up his fists. His pulse sped up. A fire heated up his cold body. The excitement he felt back then - that desire to kill- began to fill his head.

“It's the bottom of the ninth inning with two outs.”

Enokida remarked as he stood up from the chair. He picked up a red apple out of the basket of fruit and made a toothy grin. “Banbsan, the match isn't over yet.”

Enokida tossed the apple over to him. The red ball was flying right at him. Banba had smooth control, easily catching the apple with his left hand.

“The next round is the last batting.”

Banba nodded minutely at Enokida's statement.

This was his final turn at bat. If that was the case, then there was only one thing to do.

He had to make a full swing with all his might, so he would not have any regrets.

“A game-ending grand slam.” Banba took a bite out of the red apple, bearing his white teeth. “I'll have to make it happen.”

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Translation: Kaede726

Reposts are prohibited and should be exclusive to Kaede726 on blogger.

Editor: Voissane

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