Gold Dust - Part 10
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Part 10

Renunciation is not one single action, that when once accomplished we experience relief; it means a constant _sacrifice_, _restraint_, _resisting_, _rending_, each hour, each moment, during our whole life.

But is not this a worry, a continual torment? No; not if the moving spring be love or G.o.dly fear....

Do you consider it a trouble when you make yourself less comfortable to make room for a friend who visits you?

Well! there are times when G.o.d would make you sensible of His Presence. He is with you, and to retain Him close, Who is all Purity, will you not be more modest in your behavior?

If you would receive Him into your heart at Holy Communion, will you not make room for Him, by rooting out that affection He has pointed out to you as dangerous, that interest, that desire, that worldly, sensual attachment?

Oh! if you only _really_ loved.

Would you call it _torture_ or _constraint_, the energy with which you shatter some poisoned cup you were almost enticed to drink?

Well! when encountering the attractive enjoyment, the material delight, which might lead you astray, or the siren voice which would allure you from your duty for a moment--then when conscience whispers, "_Beware_," ...

would you be cowardly?

Alas, it is slowly and surely that the stream carries on to destruction the blossom that has fallen into its current.

It is little by little that pleasure leads on to sin the heart that lets itself be lulled by its charms.

THURSDAY

SUBMISSION

As soon as you awake in the morning, try to realize G.o.d stretching forth His Hand towards you, and saying, _Dost thou really desire that I should watch over thee this day?_ and you lift up your hands towards this kind FATHER, and say to Him, "Yes, yes, lead me, guide me, love me; I will be very submissive!"

Beneath G.o.d'S protecting Hand, is it possible that you can be sorrowful, fearful, unhappy?

No; G.o.d will allow no suffering, no trial, above what you are able to bear.

Then pa.s.s through the day, quietly and calmly, even as when a little child you had your mother always beside you.

You need only be careful about _one_ thing, _never to displease G.o.d_, and you will see how lovingly G.o.d will direct all that concerns you--material interests, sympathies, worldly cares; you will be astonished at the sudden enlightenment that will come to you, and the wondrous peace that will result from your labor and your toil.

Then, welcome trial, sickness, ennui, privations, injustice ... all of it can only come directed by G.o.d'S Hand, and will wound the soul only in order to cleanse some spot within.

Would your mother have given you a bitter dose merely for the sake of causing you suffering?

If your duty is hard, owing either to its difficulty or the distaste you feel towards it, lift your heart to G.o.d and say, "_Lord, help me_," ...

then go on with it, even though you seem to do it imperfectly.

Should one of those moments of vague misgivings, that leave the soul as it were in utter darkness, come to overwhelm you, call upon G.o.d, as a child in terror cries out to its mother.

If you have sinned, oh! even then be not afraid of the merciful G.o.d, but with eyes full of tears, say to Him, "Pardon me" ... and add softly, "chastise me soon, O LORD!"

Yes, yes, dear one, be always at peace, going on quietly with your daily duties ... more than that, be always joyous.

And why not?

You who have no longer a mother to love you, and yet crave for love, G.o.d will be as a mother. You who have no brother to help you, and have so much need of support, G.o.d will be your brother. You who have no friends to comfort you, and stand so much in need of consolation, G.o.d will be your friend.

Preserve always the _childlike simplicity_ which goes direct to G.o.d, and speak to Him as you would speak to your mother.

Keep that open _confidence_ that tells Him your projects, troubles, joys, as you tell them to a brother.

Cherish those _loving words_ that speak of all the happiness you feel, living in dependence upon Him, and trusting in His Love, just as you would tell it to the friend of your childhood.

Keep the _generous heart of childhood_ which gives all you have to G.o.d.

Let Him freely take whatever He pleases, all within and around you. Will only what He wills, desiring only what is in accordance with His Will, and finding nothing impossible that He commands.

Do you not feel something soothing and consoling in these thoughts? The longer you live, the better you will understand that true happiness is only to be found in a life devoted to G.o.d, and given up entirely to His Guidance.

No! no! none can harm you, unless it be G.o.d'S Will, and if He allows it; be patient and humble, weep if your heart is sore, but love always, and wait ... the trial will pa.s.s away, but G.o.d will remain yours forever.

FRIDAY

PRAYER

Oh, if you only knew what it is to pray! oh, if G.o.d would only give you the grace to love prayer! What peace to your soul, what love in your heart!

What joy would shine in your countenance, even though the tears streamed from your eyes!

_Prayer_, as the first cry escapes the lips, indicates to G.o.d that some one would speak to Him, and G.o.d, so good and gracious, is ever ready to listen (with all reverence we say it), with the prompt attention of a faithful servant, He manifests Himself to the soul with ineffable love, and says to it, "Behold Me, thou hast called Me, what dost thou desire of Me?"

_To pray_ is to remain, so long as our prayer lasts, in the Presence of G.o.d, with the certainty that we can never weary Him, no matter what may be the subject of our prayer, or at those times when we are speechless, and as in the case of the good peasant quoted by the Cure d'Ars, we are content to place ourselves before G.o.d, with only the recollection of His Presence.

_To pray_ is to act towards G.o.d as the child does to its mother, the poor man towards the rich, eager to do him good, the friend towards his friend, who longs to show him affection.

_Prayer_ is the key to all celestial treasures; by it we penetrate into the midst of all the joy, strength, mercy, and goodness Divine, ... we receive our well-being from all around us, as the sponge plunged into the ocean imbibes without an effort the water that surrounds it ... this joy, strength, mercy, and goodness become our own.

Oh, yes! if you knew how to pray, and loved prayer, how good, useful, fruitful, and meritorious would be your life!

Nothing so elevates the soul as prayer.

G.o.d, so condescending to the soul, raises it with Him to the regions of light and love, and then, the prayer finished, the soul returns to its daily duties with a more enlightened mind, a more earnest will. It is filled with radiance divine, and sheds of its abundance upon all who approach.

If you would succeed in your study, with the success that sanctifies, _pray_ before commencing.

If you would succeed in your intercourse with others, pray before becoming intimate.

Nothing so smooths and sweetens life as _Prayer_.

There is the _solitary_ prayer, when the soul isolated from all creatures is alone with G.o.d and feels thus towards Him: "G.o.d and I;" _G.o.d_ to love; _I_ to adore, praise, glorify, thank.

_G.o.d_ to bestow, _I_ humbly to receive, to renounce, ask, hope, submit!...