Jenny came running back in the room. "Oh, no! What did I miss?"

"We were discussing pickles," Gwen choked out.

"What is so funny about that?"

"I did not say pickle!" Mary said. "I said picklelike. It sort of sticks out like this, and it's kind of wrinkly and-"

"Stop!" Isabel said. "I'm going to split my spleen."

It took a while, but Gwen and Isabel final y stopped laughing, although they had to avoid looking at each other to accomplish that feat.

When Isabel final y got it together, she looked at Mary. "So?"

"I have a new found appreciation for pickles. The big ones."

They al busted up al over again, even Mary and Jenny. They were al on the floor laughing. Isabel managed to hug Mary and say, "I am so happy for you. Even though I'l never get that image out of my mind."

Mary looked at her. "Isabel, neither wil I, as I wil be facing it every night."

Isabel had to hold her tummy to keep it from exploding.

"Countess!"

Isabel was too busy laughing to hear.

"Countess!"

Jenny shook her shoulder. "I believe the king is speaking to you, mum."

Isabel sat up. "Your Highness?" she said, al laughter gone at the look on his face. "What may-"

"A word?"

"You may speak freely here, King Arthur."

"A private word."

She wasn't even dressed yet. But she rol ed to her feet and fol owed him out to the hal way.

He pul ed her, and not even gently, away from her door.

"What, Arthur? What is it?"

"I want you to pack and go."

"What? What did I do?"

"Camelot is soon to be under siege, and I need you safe, Isabel. I want you back, safe in Dumont."

She glared up at him. "No. I am staying and fighting with you."

"You wil not. You wil slip out to the west and then head north. I have already mapped your safest route with Dick."

"Oh, have you?"

"We have."

"Too damn bad. I am not leaving."

"Isabel, listen to me," he said, gripping her shoulders. "We are about to head into battle. Should we fail, we have no defense for the women."

"You dumbshit. Do you not think women can battle in our own ways? We are an asset, if you are not stupid enough to overlook us."

"Good gods, Isabel," he said, staring up at the heavens. "I do not have time for this. Do you not understand? I need you safe. Please!"

"How much time before they invade the lands of Camelot?"

"Five hours, maybe six."

"Perfect." She tried to wrench free. "Do not pul the bul y tactic on me, Arthur."

"I cannot let you be harmed. Do you not see that?"

"And I refuse to lie over your dying body while you tel me 'to thee I vow.' When you say those words, we wil be happy and alive."

"I want you alive."

"As I do you. And guess what, so does Merlin!"

"Merlin? How do you know of Merlin?"

"Do you mind if I explain that later? Right now, we have bread to bake."

She wrenched out of his arms and began running. She turned back for one moment. "By the way, I love you. Do not die, dammit. I wil be real y pissed off if you die."

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR.

ISABEL did a U-turn and ran back into her room. Al laughter had ceased as everyone sat stil .

"We must move, ladies," she said. "Camelot is under siege, and we are going to help keep those sonofabitches from overtaking us."

"What can we do?" they al said, standing up.

"Gwen, did Lance truly lay fire to al of those poison mushrooms?"

"He did not, as Arthur warned him against fire so close to the cottage. They lay there stil ."

"Oh, excel ent! Please, take Jenny with you as you know the way. Bring back as many as possible. The crushed ones most of al . But please try not to touch them, and if you chew on one, I wil kil you before the mushroom does."

She turned around. "Mary, I need you to make wigs."

"Wigs?"

"Fake long hairpieces. Braids. That wil work. You need to start with anyone who has long hair. Hel , start with me."

"Oh, Isabel! To what purpose?"

"We are going to fool those assholes. Cut my hair."

Isabel cringed as she felt the shears chop her hair up to her shoulders. "Good," she said, "now go find anyone wil ing to give hair for the cause."

Isabel didn't even bother to dress, so the shocked looks in the main kitchen were not a surprise.

She explained, as fast as she could, then begged as fast as she could. Every single cook went to work making breads and pastries, simply waiting for the final ingredient before placing them over the fires.

"And mead! Lots of mead. And lace it with the same mushroom as the breads. None of you drink or eat any of this. At least not after you add the mushroom mixture."

She ran to Arthur's study, but he wasn't there. So she turned and ran through the great hal , out the door and into the bailey. There were a ton of men there al geared up and ready for battle.

She looked around and might not have recognized Arthur if she hadn't seen a giant man beside him first, the two of them poring over maps.

She ran over to them. "Arthur, James, we have a plan. By the way, James, happy making-Mary-real y-happy day. Anyway, I need about ten scouts to just drop crumbs and such on the way to Camelot."

Arthur took off his head armor, then picked Isabel up and clinck-clincked her back into the castle.

He did not look happy.

"You didn't even listen to the plan," she complained.

"You did not even listen to me. I told you, I want you gone, Isabel."

"But I can help."

"I suppose I was attempting to be nice. I should have been more clear. I am done with you. I want you out of Camelot. You no longer interest me.

Be gone."

"I don't believe that for a second. You don't mean that."

"Believe what you want. I do not want you here. Gather Tom, Dick and Harry, and leave. I want you off my lands."

"You know what, tough boy? Tough shit!"

"Please go."

"No, you asshole. I am staying and I wil fight for Camelot and you 'til the end. Win or lose."

"If I die, Izzy, I can no longer protect you. If you go, you are out of harm's way."

"And if you don't let us try, then we cannot even help to protect you. We have plans. Arthur, there are more ways than bloodshed. In war, deception is ful y acceptable."

"What is your plan, Countess?"

Arthur whirled, Isabel stil in his arms.

"Mordred, if you are behind this, there is no love strong enough to overcome how I wil punish you," Arthur said.

"I swear, father, I knew naught of any of this."

Arthur nodded. "Your plan, then, is to escort the countess and her men back to Dumont."

"I'm not leaving," she said.

"What is your plan, Countess?" Mordred asked. "Unlike my father, I have learned to listen when you speak."

"We are going to spike the trails leading to Camelot with mushroom-laced foods and drink. We wil drop those idiots one mouthful at a time. We might not get al of them, but we wil get some. And we wil definitely slow them down."

Arthur final y placed her back on the floor. "That is bril iant."

"It is," Mordred said. "You wil need scouts to lay the trail of food and drink. I volunteer to head the group."

"Can we trust him, Arthur?" Isabel asked.

"You are a better judge of character than I, Isabel. And I have a bias. He is, after al , my son. What think you?"

She looked into Mordred's green eyes, so like his father's. "I believe that your son loves you. He would be proud to be part of the offensive against those who would harm you. Am I wrong, Mordred?"

"No, Countess. I would protect my father and his lands against al invaders. I know that I said otherwise afore, but 'twas only because I ..."

"Wanted to hurt him, as you had believed al of your life that he had hurt you."

"Yes."

"And you now realize that isn't at al true."

"Yes. I am so sorry, Father."

"Please believe in me, Son."

"I do, father."

"I believe him. Okay, please round up about ten men who know those trails better than any other. Then go to the baking kitchen and gather the food and drink, and meet me back here in the great hal . There is one other part to this plan the men wil probably not like so much. But it could wel give you more protection, should you encounter any of these marauders."