Frosting On The Cake 2: Second Helpings - Part 3
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Part 3

"Honey, I'm just trying to understand. You got up in the tree, but what did you do to your face?"

"I didn't do anything-but I didn't account for the wind, and then I got some pine pollen in my eye and forgot and wiped it. That's when it got bad."

"Sure, a bear ripping the car door off wasn't bad." CJ took a deep breath. Sarcasm was one of her strengths, but it wasn't a particularly helpful skill in getting information out of Karita. "Pine pollen did that to your face? Since when have you been that allergic to pine pollen?"

"Not the pine pollen, the pepper spray."

CJ rested her head in her hands. "Of course, what was I thinking? The pepper spray did it."

"I wasn't going to leave my purse in the car with the bear, it had my cell phone."

"And bears are well-known for ident.i.ty theft," the paramedic said with a grin, but it turned to a gulp when he took in CJ's expression.

"A bear nearly killed you. I'd appreciate it if someone took this seriously." She nearly said, "It's not funny" which was guaranteed to make everyone else think it even funnier.

"Oh, we do," the female firefighter said helpfully. "There'll be a bill for the extension ladder."

"Pepper spray," CJ said wearily. Karita might have been killed, she thought, and everyone had to be a comedian.

"The mama bear was trying to climb the tree after me. So I got out my pepper spray." She spoke to the paramedic. "My boss at the women's shelter makes us all carry it now, for when we leave the shelter late at night."

"I got a twenty-five thousand dollar donation today for the shelter," CJ said. Oh great. Now I'm acting like nothing incredibly bizarre just happened, no, it's just business as usual. A bear tore off the car door. I got a big check today too, honey. Pa.s.s the sugar.

"Really? That's wonderful news!" Karita actually looked around as if she would find her cell phone. "We should call Emily."

"I think right now, if you called Emily, she would want to know how the h.e.l.l you got covered in your own pepper spray. Maybe?"

Karita pouted slightly. "I told you. The wind."

"It blew back in your face?"

"No, that was lucky, it just got on my clothes."

Perhaps CJ's face did a better job of conveying her urgent desire for information, because Karita rapidly continued, "And I was careful, honest. I realized it could get into my face, so I knew I couldn't spray directly. I got a pine cone and sprayed that, then dropped it down toward the bear. It worked-one whiff and she took off, baby following her."

Finally, CJ had enough of the dots. "But you got something in your eye, and wiped your face with your hands..."

"Yeah. It's way better now, though."

Just since they'd been talking some of the raw swelling had subsided, but it was still hard to imagine what it must have been like at first.

"We rinsed her with eye-safe saline and applied burn ointment. This is a pretty nasty case."

Finally, Karita looked sheepish. "I realized what I'd done with my hand and it was instinctive. I tried to wipe it off with my shirt."

"And your shirt was already covered with it. Oh, honey."

Karita gave a little sigh, suddenly looking hurt and tired. "My cell phone kept chirping that annoying signal dropped sound. I couldn't see. At least the bear was gone."

"So you tried to climb down?"

"Yeah, and sc.r.a.ped my leg on a branch. I sort of slipped. I could tell it was bleeding, but I didn't want to touch it with pepper spray on my hands."

It was starting to make sense, in a very Karita sort of way. As upset as she was with Karita's reckless decision to get involved in anything to do with bears, she now only wanted to take Karita home, tuck her in bed and hold on tight for the next year or two. "So how did you get down?"

"I kept trying to send out a text. I knew the last person I'd texted was Nann, so I was hoping I pushed the right b.u.t.tons in the right order. Texts get through sometimes when there's not enough signal for a call. I thought I was typing help, but turns out I was typing G-W-K-O. She got four of those, then used the GPS locator."

She owed Nann a month of Sundays cleaning cages or something. Her imagination took off like a rat in a maze, circling around and around the pain and fear her sweetheart must have felt, none of which showed now. "Oh, honey..."

"I just want to go home, okay?"

"Can you?"

The paramedic nodded. "She's gotta sign here, and needs to have the st.i.tches checked and be watchful for infection. The tear was ragged-that's why it bled so much. No major arteries. .h.i.t."

Karita sat up to sign the paper. "I'm really thankful you came so quickly," she told the paramedic.

"At first it came in as a bear mauling."

"I don't think I was making much sense when my friend Nann found me."

CJ snorted.

Working together, and with the woman firefighter lending a shoulder, Karita was able to hobble to CJ's car. Her face had further healed by the time she was buckled safely in place. CJ led the departing parade, followed by the ambulance with the fire engine bringing up the rear.

They had pulled into their garage when Karita said in a tiny voice, "Am I in trouble?"

CJ turned off the engine. She tried to be calm, but blurted out, "You scared me to death!" Then she burst into tears. "No, don't you dare try to take care of me-I'm just upset. You stay over there until I can help."

"I really don't know how it got so bad so fast."

"You never know," CJ said, still sniffling.

"That sounds like you don't like me much."

"Sweetie..." She started to lean across the car to give her a smooch, but Karita waved her away.

"Not a good idea. What if there's still some residual spray?"

"It was a bear, honey. Not a dog. Not a cat. Not even a llama."

"I thought it was lost."

"Not everything that wanders is lost."

"I know. I just...I know you think I'm a flake sometimes."

CJ took a deep breath. "You're not a flake. You have too much savvy about a lot of things that elude me to be a flake. I wish I saw the world the way you do."

"I promise not to ever follow a wild animal again."

"Good." CJ finally got out of the car. Without Karita's Subaru, there was plenty of s.p.a.ce in the garage to maneuver. "Let's get you inside."

"Wait," she said. "I can't go in with these clothes on. The dogs will probably pick up the spray-so will the cats."

CJ laughed. She helped Karita get out of the car and did the only thing that made sense.

"Hey-at least close the garage door before you strip me."

CJ hurriedly triggered the door and once it was fully down went back to one of her favorite pastimes. "I never thought about having you naked in the garage."

"Well, it's not exactly a turn on right now."

For the first time, Karita sounded like she was in pain.

She pulled her close, lingering remnants of pepper spray be d.a.m.ned. "You know that I love you, don't you?"

"Yes, and I love you back. You put up with-"

"Shh. I'm getting you naked." Once she had bared one of Karita's shoulders, she planted a fervent smooch on it.

"Some day we'll think this is a great story." It came out as a question.

"Yes we will." CJ sighed. "Darling, life with you is complicated and never dull-but I could use a little less excitement."

Naked, Karita snuggled into her arms, averting her face from contact with CJ's clothes. "Shower?"

"Yes."

"Together?"

"Yes." She directed their steps toward the door to the house where the canine and feline audience awaited. "And then we'll go get soup in the village and talk about what you need in a car."

"Ice cream after?" Karita sniffed. "I feel like such a fool."

Wisely, Cocoa and Golden backed off, though their curly haired doodle tails wagged madly. The cats took one whiff and departed. CJ sent Karita toward the shower while she fished out two dog biscuits which sent the dogs to their respective gnawing places.

She had just reached the back of the house when she heard Karita urgently call, "CJ!"

Dropping her satchel, she hurried to the bathroom. She heard the shower running. "What is it? What do you need?"

Her voice floated over the top of the shower enclosure. "I just remembered-did you get the big deal?"

Relieved, she smiled. "Yes, I did."

Karita popped open the door and stuck her head out. "Congratulations," she said with a grin. Her hands were busy fashioning a Mohawk with the shampoo suds.

The sight of her love's still puffy and ruddy face below a white crown of foamy hair hit CJ's funny bone. Laughing, she stripped off her clothes and grabbed the shower ma.s.sage gel. No matter what the adventure, one thing was certain-her love for Karita was never complicated. It was as simple as magic.

Warming Trend.

Published: 1989.

Characters: Anidyr Bycall, doctoral candidate (glaciers) and bartender Eve Cambra, restaurateur Tan Salek, college administrator Lisa Garettson, c.o.c.ktail waitress Setting: Key West, Florida Fairbanks, Alaska.

Twenty-one! Finally of age, finally legal.

Good Morning.

(1 year).

"Are you saying I shouldn't be wearing white?"

Lisa, big surprise, wasn't smiling when she turned away from the mirror.

Ani quailed. "No, that's not what I meant-I mean, I meant it, but not what you think."

"Like you're the Virgin Mary. Oh, I forgot, you are. You did that whole fell-in-love-for-the-first-time-and-turn's-out-she's-the-one thing. If you don't count the three years you didn't speak to each other."

Lisa's hands were on her hips. That was never a good sign.

"I only meant that you're so fair I'm not sure white looks right on you. Honest." Ani did her best big, dark puppy eyes. It worked on Eve. Well, sometimes.

"I don't know why I brought you with me."

"Because Eve and Tan are out shopping for Tan's tux, and I know less about that than I do about dresses. You're going to be a beautiful bride. It almost doesn't matter what dress you get."

Her hopes of having finally worded a compliment correctly were dashed with Lisa's toss of her thick, lush, s.e.xy blonde hair.

"So that's what I'll tell my future wife? That I got just any old thing while she's out there looking at tuxedos?"

Ani put up her hands in defeat. "I give up. I can't please you."

That earned her a smile. "You don't really try."

"But I do try." She thought better of adding, "Tan is a saint for trying, and a G.o.d for succeeding."

Lisa went back to gazing in the mirror. "You really don't like this one, do you?"