"More's the pity," replied Neptune; "and how is the Prince of Wales?"

"The Prince is well," said the captain, "and now governs as regent in the name of his royal father."

"And how does he get on with his wife?" said the inquisitive G.o.d.

"Bad enough," said the captain; "they agree together like a whale and a thrasher."

"Ah! I thought so," said the G.o.d of the sea. "His royal highness should take a leaf out of my book: never allow it to be doubtful who is commanding officer."

"And pray what might your majesty's specific be, to cure a bad wife?"

said the captain.

"Three feet of the cross-jack brace every morning before breakfast, for a quarter of an hour, and half an hour on a Sunday."

"But why more on a Sunday than any other day?" said the captain.

"Why?" said Neptune. "Why, because she'd been keeping Sat.u.r.day night, to be sure; besides, she has less to do of a Sunday, and more time to think of her sins, and do penance."

"But you would not have a prince strike a lady, surely?"

"Wouldn't I? No, to be sure, if she behave herself as _sich_, on no account; but if she gives tongue, and won't keep sober, I'd sarve her as I do Amphy--don't I, Amphy?" chucking the G.o.ddess under the chin. "We have no bad wives in the bottom of the sea: and so if you don't know how to keep 'em in order, send them to us."

"But your majesty's remedy is violent; we should have a rebellion in England, if the king was to beat his wife."

"Make the lords in waiting do it, then," said the surly G.o.d; "and if they are too lazy, which I dare say they are, send for a boatswain's mate from the Royal Billy--he'd sarve her out, I warrant you, and for half a gallon of rum would teach the yeomen of the guard to dance the binnacle hornpipe into the bargain."

"His royal highness shall certainly hear your advice, Mr Neptune; but whether he will follow it or not, is not for me to say. Would you please to drink his royal highness's good health?"

"With all my heart, sir; I was always loyal to my king, and ready to drink his health, and to fight for him."

The captain presented the G.o.d with a b.u.mper of Madeira, and another to the G.o.ddess.

"Here's a good health and a long life to our gracious king and all the royal family. The roads are unkimmon dusty, and we hav'n't wet our lips since we left St. Thomas on the line, this morning. But we have no time to lose, captain," said the sea G.o.d; "I see many new faces here, as requires washing and shaving; and if we add bleeding and physic, they will be all the better for it."

The captain nodded a.s.sent; and Neptune, striking the deck with the end of his trident, commanded attention, and thus addressed his court: "Hark ye, my Tritons, you are called here to shave, duck, and physic all as needs; but I command you to be gentle. I'll have no ill-usage; if we gets a bad name, we gets no more fees; and the first of you as disobeys my orders, I'll tie him to a ten-inch mortar, and sink him ten thousand fathoms deep in the ocean, where he shall feed on salt water and sea-weed for a hundred years: begone to your work." Twelve constables, with thick sticks, immediately repaired to the hatchway, and sent down all who had not been initiated, guarding them strictly, until they were called up one by one.

The cow-pen had been previously prepared for the bathing; it was lined with double canvas, and boarded, so that it held water, and contained about four b.u.t.ts, which was constantly renewed by the pump. Many of the officers purchased exemption from shaving and physic by a bottle of rum; but none could escape the sprinkling of salt water, which fell about in great profusion; even the captain received his share, but with great good-nature, and seemed to enjoy the sport. It was easy to perceive, on this occasion, who were favourites with the ship's company, by the degree of severity with which they were treated. The tyro was seated on the side of the cow-pen: he was asked the place of his nativity, and the moment he opened his mouth, the shaving-brush of the barber, which was a very large paint-brush, was crammed in, with all the filthy lather, with which they covered his face and chin; this was roughly sc.r.a.ped off with the great razor. The doctor felt his pulse, and prescribed a pill, which was forced into his cheek; and the smelling-bottle, the cork of which was armed with short points of pins, was so forcibly applied to his nose as to bring blood; after this, he was thrown backwards into the bath, and allowed to scramble out the best way he could.

The master-at-arms, and ship's corporals, and purser's steward, were severely treated. The midshipmen looked out for the first lieutenant; but he kept so close under the wing of the captain, that for a long time we were unable to succeed. At length, some great uproar in the waist induced him to run down, when we all surrounded him, and plied him so effectually with buckets of water, that he was glad to run down the after-hatchway, and seek shelter in the gun-room; as he ran down, we threw the buckets after him, and he fell, like the Roman virgin, covered with the shields of the soldiers.

The purser had fortified himself in his cabin, and with his sword and pistols, vowed vengeance against all intruders; but the middies were not to be frightened with swords or pistols: so we had him out, and gave him a sound ducking, because he had refused to let us have more spirits than our allowance. He was paraded to the main deck in great form, his sword held over his head; his pistols, in a bucket of water, carried before him; and having been duly shaved, physicked, and soused into the cow-pen, he was allowed to return to his cabin, like a drowned rat.

The first lieutenant of marines was a great bore; he was always annoying us with his German flute. Having no ear of his own, he had no mercy on ours, so we handed him to the bath; and in addition to all the other luxuries of the day, made him drink half a pint of salt water, which we poured into his mouth through his own flute, as a funnel. I now recollect that it was the cries of the poor marine which brought down the first lieutenant, who ordered us to desist, and we served him as hath been related.

Thus far all was hilarity and mirth; but the scene was very suddenly changed. One of the foretopmen, drawing water in the chains, fell overboard; the alarm was instantly given, and the ship hove-to. I ran upon the p.o.o.p, and, seeing that the man could not swim, jumped overboard to save him. The height from which I descended made me go very deep in the water, and when I arose I could perceive one of the man's hands. I swam towards him; but, O G.o.d! what was my horror, when I found myself in the midst of his blood. I comprehended in a moment that a shark had taken him, and expected that every instant my own fate would be like his. I wonder I had not sunk with fear: I was nearly paralysed. The ship, which had been going six or seven miles an hour, was at some distance, and I gave myself up for gone. I had scarcely the power of reflection, and was overwhelmed by the sudden, awful, and, as I thought, certain approach of death in its most horrible shape. In a moment I recollected myself: and I believe the actions of five years crowded into my mind in as many minutes. I prayed most fervently, and vowed amendment, if it should please G.o.d to spare me. My prayer was heard, and I believe it was a special Providence that rescued me from the jaws of the fish. I was nearly a mile from the ship before I was picked up; and when the boat came alongside with me, three large sharks were under the stern. These had devoured the poor sailor, and, fortunately for me, had followed the ship for more prey, and thus left me to myself.

As I went up the side, I was received by the captain and officers in the most flattering manner; the captain thanked me in the presence of the ship's company for my praiseworthy exertions, and I was gazed on by all as an object of interest and admiration; but if others thought so of me, I thought not so of myself. I retired below to my berth with a loathing and contempt, a self-abas.e.m.e.nt, which I cannot describe. I felt myself unworthy of the mercy I had received. The disgraceful and vicious course of life I had led burst upon me with horrible conviction.

"_Caelo tonantem credidimus Jovem regnare_," says Horace; and it was only by the excitement of such peculiarly horrid situations, that the sense of a superintending power could be awakened within me, a hardened and incorrigible sinner.

I changed my clothes, and was glad when night came, that I might be left to myself; but oh, how infinitely more horrid did my situation appear!

I shuddered when I thought of what I had gone through, and I made the most solemn promises of a new life. How transient were these feelings!

How long did these good resolutions last? Just as long as no temptation came in the way; as long as there was no incitement to sin, no means of gratifying appet.i.te. My good intentions were traced in the sand. I was very soon as thoughtless and as profane as ever, although frequently checked by the remembrance of my providential escape; and for years afterwards the thoughts of the shark taking me by the leg was accompanied by the acknowledgment that the devil would have me in like manner, if I did not amend.

If after this awakening circ.u.mstance I could have had the good fortune to have met with sober-minded and religious people, I have no doubt but I might have had at this time much less to answer for; but that not being the case, the force of habit and example renewed its dominion over me, and I became nearly as bad as ever.

Our amus.e.m.e.nts in the gun-room were rough. One of them was to lie on the mess-table, under the tiller, and to hold by the tiller ropes above, while we kicked at all who attempted to dislodge us, either by force or stratagem. Whoever had possession had nine points of the law, and could easily oppose the whole. I one day held this envied position, and kept all at bay, when, unluckily, one of the pa.s.sed midshipmen, who had got very drunk with the gunner, came in and made a furious attack on me. I gave him a kick on the face that sent him with great violence on his back, among the plates and dishes, which had been removed from the dinner-table and placed between the guns. Enraged, as much at the laughter against him as at the blow he had received, he s.n.a.t.c.hed up a carving-fork, and, before any one was aware of his intention, stabbed me with it four times. I jumped up to punish him, but the moment I got on my legs, was so stiff, that I fell back into the arms of my mess-mates.

The surgeon examined the wounds, which were serious; two of them nearly touched an artery. I was put to bed sick, and was three weeks confined to my berth. The midshipman who had committed this outrage, was very penitent when sober, and implored my pardon and forgiveness. Naturally good-natured, I freely forgave, because I was disarmed by submission. I never trampled on a prostrate foe. The surgeon reported me ill of a fever, which was true; for had the captain known the real fact, the midshipman, whose commission was signed, and in the ship, ready to be delivered to him on his arrival at Bermuda, would certainly have lost his promotion. My kindness to him, I believe, wounded him more than my resentment; he became exceedingly melancholy and thoughtful, gave up drinking, and was ever after greatly attached to me. I reckon this among the few good actions of my life, and own I have great pleasure in reflecting upon it.

We arrived at Bermuda soon after, having left the convoy in the lat.i.tude of ten degrees north. The supernumeraries were all discharged into their respective ships; and before we separated, we had the pleasure to see the first lieutenant take his pa.s.sage in a ship bound to England.

Most sincerely did we congratulate ourselves on the success of our intrigue.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN.

Where the remote Bermudas ride, In th' ocean's bosom.

ANDREW MARVELL.

There is a peculiar kind of beauty among these islands, which we might really believe to be the abode of fairies. They consist of a cl.u.s.ter of rocks, formed by the zoophyte, or coral worm. The number of the islands is said to be equal to the days of the year. They are covered with a short green sward, dark cedar trees, and low white houses, which have a pretty and pleasing effect; the harbours are numerous, but shallow; and though there are many channels into them, there is but one for large ships into the princ.i.p.al anchorage.

Numerous caverns, whose roofs sparkle with the spars and stalact.i.tes formed by the dripping water, are found in every part of the islands.

They contain springs of delicious coolness, to quench the thirst, or to bathe in. The sailors have a notion that these, islands float, and that the crust which composes them is so thin as to be broken with little exertion. One man being confined in the guard-house for having got drunk and misbehaved, stamped on the ground, and roared to the guard, "Let me out, or, d.a.m.n your eyes, I'll knock a hole in your bottom, scuttle your island, and send you all to h.e.l.l together." Rocks and shoals abound in almost every direction, but chiefly on the north and west sides. They are, however, well-known to the native pilots, and serve as a safeguard from nightly surprise or invasion.

Varieties of fish are found here, beautiful to the eye and delicious to the taste: of these, the best is the red grouper. When on a calm, clear day you glide among these lovely islands, in your boat, you seem to be sailing over a submarine flower-garden, in which clumps of trees, shrubs, flowers, and gravel walks, are planted in wild but regular confusion.

My chief employment was afloat, and according to my usual habit, I found no amus.e.m.e.nt unless it was attended with danger; and this propensity found ample gratification in the whale fishery, the reason for which was just approaching. The ferocity of the fish in these southern lat.i.tudes appears to be increased, both from the heat of the climate and the care of their young; for which reason it would seem that the risk in taking them is greater than in the polar seas.

From what I am able to learn of the natural history of the whale, she brings forth her young, seldom more than one at a time, in the northern regions, after which, with the calf at her side, the mother seeks a more genial climate, to bring it to maturity. They generally reach Bermuda about the middle of March, where they remain but a few weeks, after which they visit the West-India Islands, then bear away to the southward, and go round Cape Horn, returning to the polar seas by the Aleutian Islands and Behring's Straits, which they reach in the following summer; when the young whale, having acquired size and strength in the southern lat.i.tudes, is enabled to contend with his enemies in the north, and here also the dam meets the male again. From my own experience and the inquiries I have been enabled to make, I am tolerably certain that this is a correct statement of the migration of these animals, the females annually making the tour of the two great American continents, attended by their young.

The maternal solicitude of the whale makes her a dangerous adversary, and many serious accidents occur in the season for catching whales. On one occasion I had nearly paid with my life for the gratification of my curiosity. I went in a whale-boat rowed by coloured men, natives of the islands, who were very daring and expert in this pursuit. We saw a whale, with her calf, playing round the coral rocks; the attention which the dam showed to its young, the care she took to warn it of danger, was truly affecting. She led it away from the boats, swam round it, and sometimes she would embrace it with heir fins, and roll over with it in the waves. We contrived to get the "vantage ground" by going to seaward of her, and by that means drove her into shoal water among the rocks.

At last we came so near the young one, that the harpooner poised his weapon, knowing that the calf once struck, the mother was our own, for she would never desert it. Aware of the danger and impending fate of its inexperienced offspring, she swam rapidly round it, in decreasing circles, evincing the utmost uneasiness and anxiety; but the parental admonitions were unheeded, and it met its fate.

The boat approached the side of the younger fish, and the harpooner buried his tremendous weapon deep in the ribs. The moment it felt the wound, the poor animal darted from us, taking out a hundred fathom of line; but a young fish is soon conquered when once well struck: such was the case in this instance; it was no sooner checked with the line than it turned on its back, and, displaying its white belly on the surface of the water, floated a lifeless corpse. The unhappy parent, with an instinct always more powerful than reason, never quitted the body.

We hauled in upon the line, and came close up to our quarry just as another boat had fixed a harpoon in the mother. The tail of the furious animal descended with irresistible force upon the very centre of our boat, cutting it in two, and killing two of the men; the survivors took to swimming for their lives in all directions. The whale went in pursuit of the third boat, but was checked by the line from the one that struck her: she towed them at the rate of ten or eleven miles an hour: and had she had deep water; would have taken the boat down, or obliged them to cut away from her.

The two boats were so much employed that they could not come to our a.s.sistance for some time, and we were left to our own resources much longer than I thought agreeable. I was going to swim to the calf whale; but one of the men advised me not to do so, saying that the sharks would be as thick about him as the lawyers round Westminster Hall, and that I should certainly be snapped up if I went near: for my comfort he added, "These devils seldom touch a man if they can get anything else." This might be very true; but I must confess I was very glad to see one, of the boats come to our a.s.sistance, while the mother whale, enc.u.mbered with the heavy harpoon and line, and exhausted with the fountain of black blood which she threw up, drew near to her calf, and died by its side; evidently, in her last moments, more occupied with the preservation of her young than of herself.

As soon as she turned on her back, I had reason to thank the "Mudian"

for his good advice; there were at least thirty or forty sharks a.s.sembled round the carca.s.ses, and as we towed them in, they followed.

When we had grounded them in the shallow water close to the beach, the blubber was cut off; after which, the flesh was given to the black people, who a.s.sembled in crowds, and cut off with their knives large portions of the meat. The sharks as liberally helped themselves with their teeth; but it was very remarkable, that though the black men, often came between them and the whale, they never attacked a man. This was a singular scene; the blacks with their white eyes and teeth, hallooing, laughing, screaming, and mixing with numerous sharks--the most ferocious monsters of the deep--yet preserving a sort of truce during the presence of a third object: it reminded me, comparing great things with small, of the part.i.tion of Poland.

I found that there was neither honour nor profit for me in this diversion, so I no more went a whale-fishing, but took my pa.s.sage to Halifax in a schooner--one of those vessels built during the war, in imitation of the Virginia pilot boats; but like most of our imitations, about as much resembling the original as a cow is like a hare, and bearing exactly the same proportion in point of velocity. And, as if it had been determined that these vessels should in every respect disgrace the British flag the command of them was conferred on officers whose conduct would not induce captains to allow them to serve under them, and who were therefore very unwisely sent into small vessels, where they became their own masters, and were many of them constantly drunk: such was the state of my commander from the time I sailed until we reached Halifax. The example of the lieutenant was followed by his mate and three midshipmen; the crew, which consisted of twenty-five men, were kept sober by being confined to their allowance, and I had a hopeful prospect.

Fortunately, drinking was not among my vices. I could get "fresh," as we call it, when in good company and excited by wit and mirth; but I never went to the length of being drunk; and, as I advanced in years, pride and cunning made me still more guarded. I perceived the immense advantage which sobriety gave me over a drunkard, and I failed not to profit by it.

Keeping constantly on deck, almost night and day, I attended to the course of the vessel and the sail she carried, never taking the trouble to consult the lieutenant, who was generally senseless in his cabin. We made Sambro Lighthouse (which is at the entrance of Halifax harbour) in the evening, and one of the midshipmen, who was more than half drunk, declared himself well acquainted with the place, and his offer to pilot the vessel in was accepted. As I had never been there before, I could be of no use; but being extremely doubtful of the skill of our pilot, I watched his proceedings with some anxiety.