Goblin Guard 2: "Giii Giii Giii Ga!"/ "Stupid Gob Get Back!"

Jack: "Giii?"/"Grunt" ("Eeh?")

My celebration was cut short by a strange noise I turned back too see two ugly loin cloth wearing generic goblins holding a primitive wooden spear with a pointed sharp rock at the end speak.

Although I couldn't understand what they were saying I felt like they were trying to talk to me.

s.h.i.+t I can't even speak English right now how in the f.u.c.k am I supposed to speak goblin?

I stood quite staring back at them thinking about how I should proceed from here.

Should I try to use body language and communicate all there saying is Giii maybe I can bull s.h.i.+t my way through this.

Goblin Guard 1: "Giii Giii Giii?" / "What No Speak?"

Goblin Guard 2: "Giii Giii." / "Talk Gob."

They spoke up again, what would Chuck do in this kind of situation?, suddenly I heard his familiar voice echoing in my head.

Chuck: "Just say Giii back, f.u.c.k it Yolo."

Jack: ("That's it!" )

I thanked Chuck mentally for his words of wisdom Chuck would never let me down and always knew what to say or do when I couldn't think of anything so I trusted his judgement over my own.

Chuck: "Anytime oooooh I'm a spooky ghost now."

I knocked on my head to get him to knock it off

I started to amp myself up and let out two deep breaths before shaking my head and slapping my cheeks.

Alright here goes everything…

Jack: "Giii Giii Giii…" / "Me Eat p.o.o.p..."

(Intended meaning : "Hi I'm Jack...")

The two goblins looked at me with a repulsed look on their face and turned to face each other before ignoring me.

Goblin Guard 1: "Giii Giii Giii Giii" / "Oi This Gob Nasty"

Goblin Guard 2: "Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii" / "Ehh We Pretend We Not See."

What they're just gonna ignore me after introducing myself?

Now that's just rude oh well I guess it's for the best,

Instead of returning to the cave I wanted to explore the terrain it looks like I'm in the middle of the forest.

After spending so much time inside of dark rooms and caves I think I've become claustrophobic.

I wanted to know where I was and whether or not I could go back home and If I could go back into my old body.

This body was a lot more capable than my human one in many ways but it had a few problems one being was my huge nose that was always visible and would block the middle of my eyesight also the stench that followed me was awful.

I can't tell if this new body is just naturally stinky or if I'm in a dire need of a bathe either way it smells worse than my gym shorts after P.E.

And probably the most crippling problem is my height those two other goblins were around my height and I don't think I'm gonna grow any taller than this anymore.

I walked aimlessly zoning out to my problems I wasn't even paying attention to the world around me.

I had a lot to think about like how do I get back home?

Or even if I wanted to return home at all I mean wouldn't my mom just shoot me again.

Or what about this body I want my old one back I don't wanna stay a midget forever!

Or where the jolly f.u.c.k am I and how in the h.e.l.l did I get here.

Eventually I found a river, perfect now I can take a bathe and wash off this smell.

I walked over to the river and saw my reflection staring back at me.

I saw a face I did not recognize it was the face of an ugly goblin.

I had large brows and light green skin those older looking goblin Guards had a darker shade of green than mine.

I guessed that the older a goblin gets, the skin would become a darker shade of green..

I couldn't help but let out a sigh I hadn't seen my face since my dad took me in to that dark room and I was starting to forget what I even looked like.

I wasn't really a fan of my new look then again that's the least of my worries right now.

I dipped my toes in the water it was cold but not freezing all I've had to drink lately was goblin blood and bug juice.

I know it's not a good idea to drink water that hasn't been purified but if I could eat raw goblin guts and poisonous looking bugs than this shouldn't be so bad right?

I cupped a handful of water and brought it to my mouth slowly sipping it in to make sure it wasn't too bad and too my surprise it wasn't half bad sure it had a bit of a salty taste too it but it sure beat goblin guts and bug juice any day so I started chugging in mouth full's of it.

I drank until I was stuffed and rinsed my body as best I could with the water every now and then a fish would swim by and I would stomp on it and fling it to the side for lunch later.

Memories of my parents taking me to the beach flooded my mind, me and my sister would always play by the water while our parents would lay by the sun and watch over us.

We would always look for crabs and stick them in Styrofoam cups to show to our parents how many we caught.

Or play tag and catch or shoot water guns I felt a smile creep over my face as I was reminded of the good times I spent with my family.

Which made it all the more harder to ignore how both my parents had betrayed me.

I hated my father but I had complicated feelings towards my mother I don't think she knew about what daddy was doing… But that doesn't mean I'm gonna forgive her for shooting me!

Jack: "Yargh! Giii! Giii! Giii! / ("Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!)

I stomped my feet in anger crus.h.i.+ng a few unlucky fish swimming by and flung them away…

when I got tired I sat down on the water letting it reach my neck.

I missed my little sister the most she was the only one who had not betrayed me I could understand why she would be scared seeing me bite down on daddy's dead body.

Of Course she would be scared of me I felt like an idiot for not trying to explain things to her.

But it's not like I could even if I wanted too even I wasn't so sure why I couldn't speak English anymore I could still think perfectly fine but every time I try talking it just comes out as grunts.

I sulked and submerged even further into the water until only my huge nose was above water, I had caught at least seven fish in my stomping rampage.

I heard the crack of a branch and tiny footsteps quickly approaching me.

My ears were a lot sharper than my human ones I had noticed a few noises here and there and ignored them after all this was a forest and there was bound to be wildlife everywhere however one distinct noise was ever so slowly approaching here and there.

I shot up at attention picking up a few large pebbles and stood in position, I was a Mvp for my junior baseball team back home so I was pretty confident in my pitch when I threw the rocks towards the noise.

????: "Gyaaa!"

Jack: "Giii Giii!" / "Eat p.o.o.p!"

(Intended meaning : "Who's There!")

A light green skinned goblin came out from the bushes with a hand on its head rubbing the spot where pebble had hit and the other raised in a show of surrender.

Green Skinned Goblin: "Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii!" / No Shoot I Sorry I very Sorry!'

The goblin waved its hands frantically it looked like it was pleading for forgiveness I couldn't understand what it was saying so I kept my guard up.

I don't know if this sounds racist or if this even counts as racist given that these things aren't even human.

But goblins all look the same to me but this goblin in particular looked a lot different from the ones I've seen before.

For starters it wasn't as ugly as the rest of them and if it wasn't for the big nose and green skin you could say it looked no different from an ordinary midget girl.

it had a fur wrap around her waist covering it kinda like a skirt and what looked like a fur strap wrapped around its chest.

It had short scruffy white hair visible through the furry animal hat it was wearing.

The hat in question looked like a brown dog the outfit was similar in style to the lady goblin that came into the cave with the basket of goodies.

Green Skinned Goblin: "Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii" / "Me Name Gia What Yours?"

This is getting annoying if only I had a skill that would let me understand what it was saying at that moment the blue screen appeared.

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[X]

Would you like to learn Goblin language

Yes or No

----------------------------------------------------

I immediately clicked yes.

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[X]

Prerequisites required : Evolution Yellow Goblin

Cost : 10 Goblin Tongues

5/10 left

----------------------------------------------------

Evolution? Yellow Goblin? How am I supposed to do that I sighed and closed the screen waving my hand at the Goblin to leave.

Jack : "Giii Giii Giii." / "I Eat p.o.o.p."

(intended meaning : "Scram go away.")

Gia stared back at the strange goblins reply he had said the same thing earlier but she thought she just misheard.

judging by his actions and body language Gia was. .h.i.t with the realization that this particular goblin couldn't speak or interact with her normally.

Was it stupid she thought she had come here because she wanted some fish and was planning on stealing it.

if he was stupid she might be able to trick him into trading it for something useless like a leaf or sticks or whatever junk was in her pockets but if he was crazy he might just attack her or ignore her without any regard.

Her third hunch was that this goblin was neither stupid or crazy but for whatever reason couldn't speak going off her intuition she called out to him this time using body language to ask for the fish.

Gia: "Giii!" / "Hey!"

She patted her right hand on her stomach and with her left she pointed at the fish Jack immediately understood what this goblin wanted and so he tossed her a fish.

Gia happily took the fish and began ferociously consuming it whole with bones and all.

The still barely living fish was alive when Gia started eating somehow it had miraculously survived Jack's stomping rampage but was flapping around in land desperately trying to get back in water.

Until Jack picked it up and tossed it at Gia what a pitiful fate for the fish when it was very close from getting back in the water without Jack even noticing it.

When Gia had finished her meal she began eyeing the rest of the Fish she had never eaten fish before and was beginning to crave it more now than ever.

Goblins tended to stay inside caves at all times only leaving to hunt at night if there were shortages of food in the caves sometimes they would attack a few unlucky travelers or adventurers wandering the woods too late at night.

The reason Gia was out and about from the cave was because she was undergoing initiation

goblins would reproduce in great numbers however many would die before fully maturing this tended to happen in larger litters when the supply of food/bugs was low leaving the runts to die off during the hibernation period.

The ones that survived are sent off into the woods for initiation to prove their worth by surviving seven moons out in the Dark Forest

Most would die from this process however it was necessary to keep the cave population under control and maintain its food supply.

If too many goblins survived the initiation the Elder Goblins would force them into a fight to the death amongst themselves to weed down their numbers into an appropriate amount.

It was survival of the fittest only the most capable and smartest goblins would survive the initiation period and if too many survived only the strongest or talented would survive the death match.

Jack like Gia were the recently matured goblins under the initiation period however this was unknown to Jack who simply going about his day.

Gia's stomach growled and Jack tossed her another fish she was more than eager to immediately consume it and sat down across from him.

Jack had paid her no mind and continued setting up the fire in Gia's eyes his actions were bizzare and without reason she was doubting whether or not he was stupid for giving her fish or was just plain crazy or both.

Her gut feeling told her he was neither but she wanted to confirm it.

Gia: "Giii GiiI Giii." / "Hey can you understand me?"

Jack: "Giii Giii Giii." /"I Eat p.o.o.p!!"

(intended meaning: "No More Fis.h.!.+")

Jack wasn't sure what she was saying but had guessed she wanted more fish having already given her two he motioned at her to scurry away.

Gia understood his intention but couldn't figure out why he was saying that phrase.

it was obvious he could understand body language from her earlier actions but this weirdo goblin who could only say the words "I Eat p.o.o.p" made her head hurt in confusion.

She pointed at the river.

Gia: "Giii Giii." / "What That."

Jack looked at direction of her pointed finger and said.

Jack: "Giii Giii Giii?" / "I Eat p.o.o.p?"

(intended meaning : "What the river?")

Jack pointed at the river and Gia nodded confirming the weirdo goblins disability.

Gia had only been able catch a few bugs she did not know how to catch fish or rabbits or anything other than bugs so her main concern was food.

She needed a way to get a constant supply of food until the initiation was over.

Luckily for her she stumbled upon this weirdo goblin and began scheming on how to make him her underling..

Gia was deep in thought trying to figure out a way to convince this weirdo goblin to continue giving her food or atleast show her how he got those fish.

She was brought back into reality when Jack slapped his hands together and began sparking the flame she looked at him with baffled eyes and nearly s.h.i.+t herself when a fire erupted out of nowhere.

She stared at Jack inquisitively as he impaled the fish with sticks and put them over the burning fire the smell was divine to her.

Never in her short life had she smelled something so delicious she sniffed at the air with her stomach growling loudly.

Her legs were beginning to get moist from the middle she couldn't describe this feeling other than good, as the feeling only grew stronger the more she sniffed the cooking fish a strong desire and l.u.s.t for the fish rose up in her driving her mad.

What Jack didn't know was that Gia was a total pervert of a glutton and was caught off guard and unprepared when she pounced on the fish over the flame setting herself on fire.

Jack's first reaction was to stand up and kick her off the fire and fish he grabbed her and threw her into the river shouting at her.

Jack: "Giii Giii Giii Giii Giii GIii!" / "I Eat p.o.o.p I Eat p.o.o.p!"

(Intended meaning: "WHAT THE f.u.c.k ARE YOU DOING!")

Gia had somehow managed to avoid being burned but her hat and her clothing were scorched she was holding a fish in her mouth and began to swallow it whole still enticed by the fishes aroma..

Jack began to throw rocks and pebbles at Gia to get her to go away.

Gia realizing her actions after she had finished eating the fish felt embarra.s.sed.

Her face flushed red as she ran away from the barrage of rocks heading her way feeling more shocked and surprised by her own actions than that Weirdo Goblin.

When Jack had seen the crazy goblin disappear into the forest he felt relieved, he ate the rest of his fish it was starting to get dark outside so he decided to call it a day.

He still felt tired after that crazy goblins actions so he climbed up a tree and fell asleep thinking it was the safest place to sleep as he left let fire burn out.

Ending Jack's first day of the initiation period...