She found herself opening her eyes and looking up at that shadowy face above her. "No! I won't do it. I won't." She frantically pulled away and shut her eyes again. "Go away. Let me alone."

"Dammit, stop pushing me away. I'm trying to-"

"No!"

She woke to see Silver bending over her. "Damn you." She shoved him away and sat up in bed. "What the devil did you think you were doing?"

"I don't have to think, I know I was scaring the bejesus out of you." He swung his feet to the floor and got to his feet. "Come on, let's get you in the shower. You've broken out in a cold sweat."

Yes, she had, and she was shaking so badly that she could barely talk. "And you had nothing to do with it, I suppose. Those nightmares are bad enough without you sticking in your two cents worth."

"Then get rid of them." He pulled her out of bed and wrapped her in a sheet. "Shower. You can spit at me later."

"I want to spit at you now." But she let him lead her toward the bathroom. She was in no shape to fight a battle right now. "You had no right to-"

"Hush." He pushed her under the warm spray of the shower and then got in with her. "You're absolutely correct. I intruded, I violated your privacy, I even broke my own code." He grimaced as he handed her the sponge. "Such as it is. I constantly seem to be bending the rules."

"You shouldn't have done-" She stopped as he began kneading her neck. God, that felt good. The tension was flowing out of her. "I'm not going to forgive you. How can I trust-"

"Shh, think about it later."

Yes, think about it later. The heat of the water was banishing the chill, and his touch was soothing away her tension. She closed her eyes and let herself drift.

"Good." Minutes passed and then he was bundling her out of the shower and toweling her off. "Now let's get you back to bed and I'll let you vent."

She didn't want to vent, she realized. Any attack she made would lead to a confrontation, and she was afraid Silver would- "You bet I will." He wrapped her in a blanket and tucked her in bed before crawling in beside her. "But you've been through enough tonight. I'll let you off."

"Don't expect me to thank you. And are you still spying on me? Get the hell out."

"I got out. But you know I can't keep from picking up on an odd thought or two when you scream it at me." His arms enfolded her and he cuddled close, spoon fashion. "Go to sleep. You're done with dreaming for tonight." He brushed her temple with his lips. "If you wander too close, I'll jerk you back."

"Or jump in where you don't belong."

"I belong."

"The hell you do." She was silent a moment before she asked, "Why did you do it, Silver?"

"You were in pain. I couldn't stand it."

"It was my pain, my memories. My right to handle them."

"You're not handling them. You're hiding, and as long as you do that, they're going to torment you."

"So you tried to force me to come out of hiding?"

"You'd know it if I used force. I was just nudging a little."

"You kept telling me to look at his face. That was stupid. It was too dark for me to see anything."

"Was it? He was under the streetlight."

"Not when he turned on me. I ran after him. He was in the shadow."

"So he was a total blank page."

"Yes, of course he was." She stiffened. "Why don't you believe me?"

"Because you don't believe it yourself."

"I do. I do."

"Easy. I'm not pushing you right now." He pulled her closer. "Go to sleep."

"I can't go to sleep. How do you expect me to sleep when you keep saying things to stir me up? Just stay away from-"

"I can't." His voice was low. "I won't."

"Why not?"

"Because if you decide to walk away from me, you're going to take something with you. This is something I can give you. Something no one else will ever be able to give you."

She was silent. "You mean, you're doing this to give me a kind of . . . present?"

"You might call it that. Or you might say my ego won't let me be forgotten. It's my way of assuring my immortality in your eyes. Either way, you have something broken and I'm going to fix it."

"Even if I don't want you to do it."

"Then fight me. You managed to push me out this time. You're getting stronger all the time. You might be able to send me on my way."

"I will." She closed her eyes. "You're right: You get in my way and I'll send you packing." It was strange to think of rejecting him in any way when she was lying close like this. He always managed to make her feel wonderfully treasured. Dear God, she would miss it when they were no longer together. "And now I'd appreciate it if you'd stop talking so that I can rest."

"I'll be quiet as a mouse."

"I don't like mice. They scamper."

"Well, I don't scamper. I stride like a lion."

She yawned. "Too many metaphors."

"I agree. So I'll just shut up."

"That was what I asked in the beginning." She tried to relax. Close out the world. Close out the dream. Close out Silver. No, she couldn't close out Silver. He was always with her now. But that was okay because he was like a part of her, comfortable and familiar. . . .

She was just drifting from waking to sleep when Silver whispered in her ear, "What did you see, Kerry?"

What was he talking about? she thought hazily.

"What did you see when you looked up at him? Tell me."

"Can't . . ."

"Yes, you can. Just tell me and then you can go to sleep. Reach deep. What did you see?"

Reach deep . . .

Darkness. Fire outlining his tall body and casting his face in shadow.

"Blue eyes," she whispered. "Blue eyes . . ."

14.

Dickens's hands tightened on the steering wheel as he hit a rut and almost skidded off the road.

"Son of a bitch!" The curse was followed by a string of other obscenities. He'd be lucky if he got back to town without a flat tire. That's all he needed. He'd have to change it himself, because he was under Trask's orders not to attract undue attention. As if he'd be that stupid. But Trask thought everybody but himself was an idiot and treated them that way.

Just a few miles more and he could turn around and get out of here. Check it out and then he'd be able to call Trask and give him his report. He hoped to hell it was going to be what the bastard wanted. This was the eighth trip he'd had to take, and he was sick of it.

He drove around the bend and there it was.

He gave a low whistle.

He parked the car on the side of the road before glancing down at the photo on the seat beside him.

Maybe. Just maybe . . .

Blue eyes.

It was the first thought that came to Kerry's mind when she woke the next morning. One moment she was deep in slumber and the next wide awake, her heart pounding as if she'd been running. She sat upright in bed. What the hell?

And where was Silver?

She swung her legs to the floor and jumped out of bed.

Five minutes later she was dressed and running down the stairs.

"Good morning," George said as he came in the front door. "You look a bit edgy."

"You might say that. Where's Silver?"

"Right behind me. We were checking over the grounds. He wanted to make sure that the guards weren't missing any signs of intruders. A suspicious man is our Brad."

"Your Brad. I'm not claiming him at the moment."

His brows lifted. "Indeed? Then maybe he had reason to get away from the house for a while." He turned as Silver came in the door. "You're in her bad books." He moved toward the library. "And I'm out of here. I think I should be hearing from the CIA any time now on the identity of our mysterious Helen, and I need to be available." He cast a glance at Kerry over his shoulder. "Try not to damage him too badly. I still haven't had my rematch with him."

"He may have waited too long," Kerry said grimly as the door shut behind George. "Now he'll have to stand in line. What did you do to me?"

"I thought we'd discussed that last night."

"Don't give me that. I mean right before I went to sleep. Did you give me some sort of posthypnotic suggestion to jog my memory?"

He was silent a moment. "Maybe."

"And it wasn't just coincidence I had that dream last night."

He shrugged. "There aren't many true coincidences in this world."

She hadn't known until this moment how desperately she'd wanted to be wrong. "Damn you. It was bad enough that you barged in where you had no business. You actually manipulated me. You said you wouldn't do that. You promised me. Why the hell did you break your word?"

"I couldn't think of any other way to do it. You were resisting me tooth and nail. I had to catch you when you were relaxed and your defenses were down."

"And it didn't occur to you that you'd destroy any trust I had in you?"

"It occurred to me. I decided it was worth the chance. He was the monster who haunted you all your life. You needed to face him instead of hiding."

"In your judgment."

"In my judgment."

"You arrogant son of a bitch."

"Yes, I certainly am. I never denied that I'm a selfish bastard and that I probably ran the risk for my benefit too." He added simply, "I couldn't stand you hurting. Every time I touched that part of you, it made me . . . ache. It had to end, Kerry."

"And just what do you think you gained?"

"If you'd let yourself look beyond the anger, you might find out."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Blue eyes," he said softly. "He had blue eyes. Why didn't you want to remember that, Kerry?"

"Maybe I didn't remember. Maybe you planted that thought when you were-"

"You don't believe that," he interrupted. "Cut through the bullshit and tell me why you blocked out of your memory the man who killed your mother."

"I didn't. I was in a coma, and when I woke I couldn't remember."

"But you remembered last night. You remembered blue eyes. If I'd probed a little deeper, would you have been able to describe him?"

"No!"