He pulled his finger from me.

"Please, don't stop, please."

"Tell me," he said.

My pleasure was contingent upon my answer. My hips rolled back against him and ground against his c.o.c.k.

"None," I said. Heat bloomed in my chest. I'd had lovers, but none that I'd allowed to fully take me. Not as Sterling had. No man had been inside my body since him.

He gaze locked with mine in the mirror. Surprise spread across his face. Surprise and something that was reverence.

"Rhiannon."

He turned me toward him. The heat was there still but something else, something deeper, something more sincere. "What do you mean? How is that possible? You've been in Europe for years."

"I've dated. I've even had lovers, I've simply never ..." I couldn't meet his eyes. Embarra.s.sed by my choices, by what seemed to be my lack of experience. "I simply haven't had s.e.x with anyone else."

I'd wanted other men; physically my body had longed to be taken by others, but I refused. Each time I got close, each time I neared the moment of being with a man, it was Sterling's face I saw. Sterling's touch I craved. Instead of forcing my eyes closed and moving forward, I'd simply pulled away. For years. As I'd grown close to experiencing the most intimate of moments with another man I would pull away. For me, the physical pleasure of s.e.x was forever linked to Sterling Legend.

Sterling looked as if my words had slapped him. He stood frozen in front of me. Solid, like stone. It was as though he had no idea how to respond, what to say to my admission, to the knowledge that I'd taken no other lovers. In all the time, all the travel, all the men, I'd not allowed anyone else to enter my most intimate of s.p.a.ces. And Sterling Legend was now realizing what that meant.

Sterling What the f.u.c.k? My belly pitted and my throat was tight. What could I say? How could I say it? She'd been with no other man in seven years? She'd had lovers, but no man had f.u.c.ked her in all that time? I released her. I grasped at my hair, confused by Rhiannon's statement. I stepped back from Rhiannon and looked at her exquisite nakedness. My hands fell to my sides. The anger that I'd felt toward Dad and then directed at Rhiannon was extinguished. Anger at her being here, and anger at her refusal to give me the answers I needed vaporized. But what was her intention?

But with her admission I needed to consider what was mine. Our teenage affair, our love, had meant as much to her as it had to me. And when it had ended I'd try to f.u.c.k away the memory of her, while she'd been unable to f.u.c.k at all.

I bent to the floor and my fingertips brushed the soft linen of her dress. I turned it right side out. I stepped to Rhiannon and pulled the dress down over her head. Her beauty, G.o.d, her beauty still stunned me. The questions in her eyes made confusion burst through me. But what could I say to her? How could I explain? I couldn't just f.u.c.k her now, out of anger, and loss, and simple desire and need. She was an exquisite porcelain creature that I cared for and she cared for me. I pressed my lips to the top of Rhiannon's head and wrapped my arms around her. I drew her close. I had to think. I had to be still.

"Sterling? Are you angry? I don't understand."

"No," I said. Reverence permeated through me. Desire combined with the knowledge that this woman was still my precious gift. A gift that I'd unwrapped much too soon, but a gift that was still mine. I pulled back and looked into her eyes. "I want you. I've always wanted you. I've spent my lifetime wanting you. But here, now, like this? This isn't how I want us to be together. I need us to be an us."

Her bottom lip trembled. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers, if only to stop the sadness and pain and confusion in her eyes.

"Can I show you my Venice?" I asked. I pressed my forehead to hers.

She nodded. It was a slow and tentative nod, but it was a yes.

My phone rang and I pulled it from my pocket. "Cami" flashed across the screen. I took a long deep breath, knowing what was coming based on my phone conversation with Mike Fox.

"Excuse me, I'm sorry," I said. "I have to take this."

Rhiannon wrapped her arms around herself and nodded. She turned away from me and back to her mural. The giant piece of art that she'd created. The art that I liked to believe she had created just for me, for us. I pressed the on b.u.t.ton.

"Hey, Cami," I said.

"Sterling, you heard?"

"Yeah, I heard," I said. "Congratulations. It's a big deal. You may be the first female director to ever be offered a project with that big a budget."

"Those a.s.sholes!" Cami said. "I'm not taking that f.u.c.king job! Are you kidding me? No f.u.c.king way. And Jennifer? She can kiss my a.s.s," Cami said. "In fact, she has kissed my a.s.s and I might just leak that to TMZ because she is being such a d.a.m.ned starf.u.c.ker!"

"Whoa, wait? You're not taking The Legend Kills gig?"

"h.e.l.l, no," Cami said.

"Cami, as much as I appreciate your loyalty, are you sure this is a good idea? The Legend Kills is a huge film, a part of a billion-dollar franchise. That film could cement your career. To turn your back on a Steve Legend film with a hundred million budget for a tiny indie that sports five million? I mean, no agent in town would advise that. No one in town would advise that."

"f.u.c.k 'em," Cami said. "I didn't get into this business for the money. I got into it because I want to tell awesome stories with awesome people. Besides, in ten years will anybody remember who directed The Legend Kills? They will remember who won the Oscar for best director for a feature film called The Lady's Regret."

"Cami Montgomery," I said. "I like the way you think. You are awesome."

"Worldwide bailed right? On foreign distribution and financing?"

"Yes," I said. "We need a financier who will cash flow the whole thing."

"Already done," Cami said. "I'm going to Montecito for dinner tomorrow. Mom already said she'd consider it, and with these strong-arm tactics from Worldwide, I'm sure she'll say yes. We still have to find a lead. Jennifer is starry-eyed over working with your dad and that huge payday."

"Just wait until she finds him in her Starwagon with his d.i.c.k out of his drawers."

"She won't care," Cami said. "p.u.s.s.y or d.i.c.k, she simply likes to screw. How do you think she got this far this fast?"

Chapter 13.

Sterling.

After showing Rhiannon around Venice, I'd taken her home to Gayle's ranch. Days later my body still ached for her. Was this an ache I'd experience for the rest of my life? I wanted Rhiannon with a fierce hunger and a need that eclipsed just the physical and went much deeper to the emotional core. I wanted her. I didn't want her to return to Paris. I wanted her to travel with me and be mine.

I ripped the car from Venice toward the Palisades and Amanda's house. I wanted to sit down with Amanda and discuss The Lady's Regret and how things were coming along getting the film into production. To be honest, my sit-down with my sister wasn't all about work. She spoke to Rhiannon almost every day. They'd fallen back into their fast friendship. Perhaps my sister could give me some guidance on what to do and how to proceed.

Cami had texted me the good news that her mom was still in. Elizabeth Montgomery would cash flow the film. We were still missing our star. Jennifer Laredo had accepted Worldwide's offer to star alongside my dad in The Legend Kills and they had begun soft prep. How were they doing this? No producer, other than Dad, had stepped up to take over the film. Dad couldn't star in the film and produce. My father could do a lot of things, but he didn't have the ability to troubleshoot and remain calm. Which was primarily what a producer did on set, plus keep the entire cast and crew on time and hopefully happy.

My phone rang in the car. "This is Sterling."

"I have Kiley Kepner for Sterling Legend," a light and airy voice chirped into my car. I grimaced. This was not a call I was keen to take, but curiosity got the better of me. The divorce between my father and Kiley had been finalized two months ago. She was no longer a part of my family, but the memories of how awful she'd been to my sister, my dad, and my friends were still fresh in my mind.

"Put her through," I said. I didn't like Kiley but she was, as of this moment, one of the world's biggest female stars.

"Sterling." Her voice would feel like a soft caress if I weren't aware of the cruel shallow person to whom it belonged.

"Hey, Kiley." I put my Hollywood film producer nonchalance and I-love-everyone game face into high gear. Kiley couldn't be trusted. She was a deceitful, vile creature in a fantastic-looking package. Filmmaking was just like any other business-you didn't always have the luxury of working with people you liked. "How are you?"

"I hear you're making The Lady's Regret, with Cami Montgomery directing." Kiley got straight to the point.

"That's the plan. We still need put some pieces together."

"I heard you went out to Jennifer Laredo."

I took a long slow breath. "We did but she recently got offered The-"

"Legend Kills. I know," Kiley said.

Of course she knew. She was a big star with eyes and ears everywhere.

"Steve loathes The Lady's Regret," Kiley said. Glee trickled through her voice.

"We're not working together on the project," I said, cutting her off. "How can I help you, Kiley?"

"I want to play the lead in The Lady's Regret, and I'll do it for SAG scale plus ten percent and a producer's credit."

My teeth clamped together. f.u.c.k! I broke into a sweat. This was one of the world's biggest stars offering to play the role in my film. I should be ecstatic. With Kiley in the lead all my problems were solved. As an A-List star, she would attract a great male co-star, we would get all our necessary foreign pre-sales, we could go into prep immediately, we would even have an excellent shot of recouping all the money we'd laid out. Kiley's motivation to do this film was transparent-it was due entirely to sheer meanness. Working with her would create a chasm between my father and me as big as the Grand Canyon. He hated the script and he'd just divorced Kiley. Plus what would I tell Amanda?

"Amanda is a producer on the film. I need to speak with her before I can give you an answer ..." I said. "I also need to run it by Cami."

"And don't forget Elizabeth Montgomery," Kiley said. "I hear she's the one bankrolling the entire production."

"Right. Give me today. I'll get back to you quickly."

"Talk to Amanda and Cami and let me know," Kiley said. "I've always loved the script and, to be honest, Sterling, I love the idea of making my ex-husband mad even more." I could see her evil smile over the phone. I pressed the off b.u.t.ton. I wanted to be able to tell her no, to say go to h.e.l.l, but with the deadline approaching for the option there was little that I could do but say yes. Kiley Kepner, the woman every member of the family loathed, might be the only way to make The Lady's Regret.

I pulled into Amanda's driveway. I couldn't wait to tell her about Kiley.

Having a nearly married sister meant there was always a stocked refrigerator. Mine always had booze, but I wasn't so great at keeping food at my place. I pulled a beer from the refrigerator and walked toward the backyard. I heard female voices but couldn't make out the words. I looked through the sliding doors. Amanda drifted on a raft along the bright blue surface of her pool. Maeve sat on the second step in the shallow end and Rhiannon lay on a chaise in the shade by the pool. My eyes roamed over her bare skin. Her head turned toward me as though she'd felt my gaze.

"Sterling!" Amanda called. A near-empty pitcher of margaritas sat on the pool deck. Maeve waved to me. I hadn't known that she'd returned home. Amanda's wobbly grin indicated that they'd been there for quite a while.

"We were just talking about you," Amanda said.

"Maeve!" I said and walked over to Rhiannon's sister. "Is that you? All grown up!" I kissed both her cheeks. She looked like her sister except with a darker complexion and dark red hair. Plus, with Maeve, her rebellious spirit always shone through.

"Sterling! How the heck are you?" She wrapped an arm around my neck and leaned in next to my ear. Her words were a whisper for only me to hear. "Would you two please stop torturing each other and just admit you're meant to be together?"

There was tequila on Maeve's breath and we both wore sungla.s.ses. I couldn't read her expression but she wore a smile on her lips.

"I've loved her my whole life," I said.

"And she you."

Maeve released her grasp around my neck and bent down to the pool where Amanda stood refilling margaritas.

I walked to Rhiannon and sat down on the end of her lounger. She seemed to be the most sober of the three. "How long have you ladies been drinking and sunning?"

"Since ten a.m.," Amanda called.

"We spent the night," Maeve said. "Lots to catch up on."

"Gayle's housekeeper stayed at the ranch so I've got these two for a couple of days." Amanda was beaming. Having her two best friends with her made her happy. "Lane would have come but she already signed on to help at a charity event in San Francisco. She might be able to come by later this afternoon."

"Wow, you've got a regular girls' weekend going on here."

"The ma.s.seuse arrives this afternoon," Amanda said.

"When does Ryan get home?" I asked.

"They're on set in New Mexico for a week," she said and waved her hand. "That's why I broke out the blender!" While Ryan didn't mind when others drank, I knew that Amanda often didn't imbibe when he was around as a show of solidarity for her sober husband. His fight to remain sober wasn't always easy. Her respect for the choice Ryan made each day to remain sober was deeply etched into their relationship.

"Shhh," Amanda said and pressed her finger to her mouth, "we won't tell him we got a little boozy by the pool." Amanda held out a gla.s.s of margaritas to Rhiannon. I leaned forward, took it from Amanda and handed it to Rhiannon. Heat spiraled through me when her fingers touched mine. Cast back into the role of adolescent schoolboy, when Rhiannon was near my body tensed with her touch. I released the gla.s.s into Rhiannon's hand and turned back toward the pool.

Amanda hopped back onto her pool float without spilling a drop of her drink. "Not that you need a reason, big brother, but why are you here? You seem too serious for just a drop-by."

"I wanted to talk to you about the film," I said.

"Jennifer Laredo?" Amanda asked with a hopeful smile on her face.

"Accepted The Legend Kills."

"Dammit. Daddy!" Amanda said and splashed her hand into the pool. "Why does he hate this project so much? Why doesn't he understand we need to make it for Mom?"

I glanced toward Maeve and wished those sungla.s.ses weren't on her face. Why did both Maeve and Rhiannon's father and my dad hate this project so much? Was there something that the Bliss sisters knew that Amanda and I didn't?

"Who's next?" Amanda asked. "We're running out of time."

"I got a call on the way over here," I said. "You won't like it, but it will get The Lady's Regret made."

Amanda's jaw dropped open and she tilted her head to the side. "You're kidding me, right?"

I didn't even have to say the name and already Amanda knew which female star I'd spoken to.

"Seriously? Seriously you want me to be a producer on a film and let Kiley-f.u.c.king-Kepner play a role that was written for our mother? Sterling? Come on! You seriously expect me to say yes to this?"

"Kiley playing the role gets The Lady's Regret made." Amanda was tipsy. Now wasn't the best time to discuss Kiley with my sister. Amanda was good at the Legend facade until she got drunk. Drunk Amanda was much more emotional and verbal than sober Amanda. I knew this from experience.

"Sterling! It was written for our mother! How can you even consider that b.i.t.c.h for this role?"

"I'm not considering Kiley! She called me." I stood from the chaise lounge and put my hands on my hips. "Dad doesn't want this movie made and he is doing everything he can to sink the film. Tom informed us that if we're not in production when the option lapses he is sc.r.a.pping the entire script and shredding the whole d.a.m.n thing because he doesn't want to see The Lady's Regret made either. Dad took my foreign distribution, stole my lead, and tried to take my director. I've lost my job at Legend Films and the only way I can make this movie is if we say yes to Kiley Kepner. It's a complete load of s.h.i.t. Believe me, I know." My voice had grown louder with each word. My features were stern. A tightness clamped my chest. "I don't want Kiley in the role that was written for Mom, but I don't know what else to do."

"Maybe find another actress?" Amanda said.

"Cute," I countered. "As though I haven't reached out to every actress who has any value in the marketplace." My lungs filled with air and I sat back down at the end of Rhiannon's chaise. "Please believe me when I tell you, Kiley Kepner is our only hope."

"Those words are terrifying," Amanda said. "You're pinning the film's success on that evil, calculating b.i.t.c.h. How do we know she doesn't totally screw us once we get into production?"