"Nothing she says could make this any worse."

"I wouldn't bet on that." Less than convinced by Dan's claim about that she and Solley were going to stay together, Janie said, "Please, Gin. Delay your fl ight till tomorrow so you can see Solley before you go."

"I expected to see her now, but perhaps it's better that she isn't here." Gin slipped her arm around Janie's waist. "This situation is a mess and I'm responsible for my part in that. The least I can do is step back and let them work things out."

Janie wished she knew what Dan and Solley had talked about during their private breakfast. She had trouble believing Solley would just walk right back into the relationship that had made her so unhappy. Nothing was going to change. But Gin was right. It was probably better that she kept her distance.

The thought made Janie sad. She'd seen how Solley glowed around Gin, and how Gin came alive when they were together. Giving Gin a squeeze, she said, "Sometimes the timing isn't right. But that can change. Nothing stands still."

Gin sighed. "Tell Solley I'm sorry I missed her."

"Did you try her cell phone?" Janie could hear a note of desperation in her own voice.

"Yes, and I heard it ringing in her room."

"G.o.dd.a.m.n," Janie muttered. Dan only had to snap her fi ngers and Solley jumped to. She'd seemed fl ustered when they left and had obviously forgotten her phone in the rush not to keep Dan waiting.

"It's okay," Gin said. "Just tell her I'll be thinking of her and I hope everything works out the way she wants."

Janie's throat was too thick for her to form a reply. As she a 147 a watched Gin walk out the door, she felt a sense of helpless gloom. Solley had to make her own mistakes, but Janie had a feeling this would be one of her biggest.

Solley pounded into the trailer camp several hours later and realized she had no idea where Gin or Marsha were working today. They were usually out on location somewhere around the bay, but where? She plucked idly at a waist-high stem of blackened dune gra.s.s and whipped it before her as she walked.

Maybe if she went directly to Gin's trailer? She paused, gazing around for someone to ask about today's shoot. Two young women walked nonchalantly past her, slipping sly sideways glances in her direction before lowering their heads.

"That's her," one whispered loudly to the other. "She's a professional dominatrix Ito had fl own in from Rio."

Solley groaned. It was those two gossiping b.i.t.c.hes again.

Did their entire job involve waltzing up and down this trailer park, talking absolute s.h.i.t? Slivers of their conversation drifted toward her.

"A dominatrix? You have got to be kidding me. Not with those looks. I heard she's a fan. Some crazy stalker."

"And I heard Kelly Rose has fl uid on her lungs and might die."

"I wish."

"She has her own BDSM p.o.r.n site," the friend insisted.

"It's called Rayner Terror."

"Don't look now, but I think she's following us."

They both threw cautious glances over their shoulders and paled to see Solley bearing down on them like a dungeon mistress ready to whoop some a.s.s. She'd heard more than enough of their vacuous b.i.t.c.hing. They took to their heels, a 148 a scrambling up and over the sand dunes. Mildly stunned by their extreme reaction, Solley dropped her gra.s.s "whip" and didn't bother to follow. Rayner Terror. She grinned.

She heard her name and turned around to see Marsha striding toward her. "I was looking for you."

"Likewise." Solley looked past Marsha's shoulder. There was no sign of Gin. "I thought I'd fi nd Gin with you. I really need to talk to her."

Marsha's face stilled. "Oh, you missed her, Sol. She just left. She's starting a job in Canada next week."

"Canada? She didn't say anything about that."

"Well that's an international stunt star for you. Gin picks up work anywhere, anytime." Marsha held up a selection of packages she had cradled in her arms. "She asked me to give these to the kids. Plus some extra stuff from the movie...as promised." She fussed with the bags, probably so she didn't have to look at Solley.

Solley was stunned. It was understandable for Gin to have to pack up and move quickly on to the next job. G.o.d knew, she'd always expected it to happen. But now that it had she felt the loss so deeply she didn't know how to react.

"She didn't say good-bye." The moment the words left her lips she felt stupid and childish, glad Marsha was looking anywhere but at her.

"She wanted to. But you weren't around. I think she left a message on your cell phone." Marsha tried to console her.

She offered an elbow for Solley to link on as they walked back home. "Once she and Dan got through talking, she left right away."

"Dan talked to her?" Solley felt sick. She could imagine how that conversation went. No wonder Gin hadn't waited around to exchange fond farewells.

"Guess what?" Marsha made an obvious attempt to lighten a 149 a the mood. "There's a cast party at our house next week. For the end of the shoot. Grace is coming down for it."

"That's good." Solley tried her best to sound interested that the youngest Rayner sister was expected, but she fell short of the mark. She was barely listening. Instead she was lost in self-recrimination, her gaze on the distant horizon.

She'd tried to be brave by acting on her attraction to Gin, but her selfi sh choices had set Gin up for a mean-spirited lawsuit, and now she couldn't even tell her, in person, how dreadfully sorry she was. Or that she wished her good luck for the future. Or that she cared for her and would miss her. Or...

Don't go there, Rayner. You're a fool. Gin doesn't need you.

She needs to get far away from you and your miserable mess of a life, and that's exactly what she's doing.

"Here, can you take these packages back to the house?"

Marsha asked. "I gotta go collect Janie's dry cleaning."

The request shook Solley out of her semistupor. She was so close to tears she felt like a teenager. Knowing her distress must be obvious, she said, "Let me run into town instead. I need a little time away."

"Sure." Marsha nodded rapidly. "I'll tell Janie you'll be late for lunch."

"Thanks." With a grateful smile Solley headed back the way she'd come.

She needed time away from the house, if only to compose herself. The more it sank in that Gin had gone, the deeper it cut. There was no way she could face Dan at the moment and not hit her with one of Janie's tasteful ornaments. She had to get away. In fact, she had to break away.

Gin stood like an automaton, shouldering her hand luggage, barely registering the boarding announcement for her a 150 a fl ight to Vancouver. Part of her was glad to shuffl e toward the gate that would take her away from this hiatus in her numb, empty life. The rest of her screamed in protest, urging her to run from the terminal and kick and scratch and fi ght for what she wanted. What she needed, to survive as a fully functional human being.

She had known it would be hard to leave, but she still felt betrayed by her feelings. She had so underestimated the dictates of her heart. So much for the sanctuary of La Sirena Verde as a place to heal. Just when she sensed she was fi nally coming to terms with the loss of Miki, a fresh wound had opened. She felt incredibly fragile at the thought of not seeing Solley again.

She felt fl ayed. Totally raw. Every nerve lay exposed. The pain shocked her, hitting her full force on the chest as though her heart had been ripped apart.

Gin stowed her bags and belted herself into her seat. The image of Dan and Solley together haunted her. What she really needed was a run along La Sirena's cliff tops to shake off her emotional upheaval. Instead she would be trapped in her seat listening to the whine of the engines as her plane took her farther away from any hope she'd ever had of...of what?

She closed her eyes for take-off. Solley's bright smile lit up the darkness, her green gaze dancing with happiness as they sat and watched the seals out in the bay. She'd been so relaxed that day, during those hours they'd spent by themselves for the fi rst time. Gin knew Solley had also felt the connection between them. They couldn't resist each other, although they'd both tried.

Later, when they became lovers, Gin saw a different light in Solley's eyes. Dark and sensual. Bruised with pa.s.sion.

She'd fallen into those eyes and still hadn't emerged. Marsha had warned her of love like this. Love that swallowed you whole. Gin understood her meaning exactly. She'd fallen into Solley, heart and soul.

a 151 a Her mind wandered full circle to the question she'd been avoiding all day, the pathetic, half-a.s.sed question of a hopeless dreamer. Could she manage to woo Solley Rayner away from Dan? It seemed impossible now that they were reunited. Dan was a hard-hearted, self-centered, womanizing pig, but she was still Solley's partner and coparent. During their brief, uncomfortable discussion, Dan had made it clear that she intended to continue in that role.

Gin knew she should be angry and outraged over the proposition Dan put to her, but she felt only a dull sorrow and something close to relief. If she could do something to help Solley, the details weren't important. Knowing how determined Solley was to keep her family together and make sure her kids were happy, it wasn't surprising that she'd decided to try again with her partner. Ultimately it was her choice.

But did she even know she had a choice? Gin had disappeared like a coward, leaving her to draw her own conclusions. What a fool. Why had she not been braver and explained how she felt? Why was she so G.o.dd.a.m.ned scared?

She bitterly regretted running away. She should have stayed and fought Dan for her. If Solley refused, it could be no worse than what she felt right now.

Gin had a contract to sign and a location to approve in Vancouver. It would take four days. After that she was free for a month. Once she'd taken care of the other business matters that needed her attention, what would she do? She stared out the window at a cloudless blue sky and, for several long, painful seconds, pictured Solley vanishing from her life forever. She couldn't allow that to happen.

I'm going to give myself a second chance. Because after Miki, this is my second chance at life and love. Perhaps my only one. Please let Solley want a second chance, too.

a 152 a

CHAPTER THIRTEEN.

Five days later, Solley paused her SUV at the crest of La Sirena Verde and let the motor idle while she gazed down into the secluded bay, watching the white surf break onto the sun-drenched beach. Gulls swooped and soared idly in the lazy heat of the late afternoon, their haunting cries carried on the wind. The peace and tranquility was a soothing balm for her tattered nerves and crushed spirit.

To her left, far down in the dunes she could see the partially dismantled movie camp. Filming had fi nally wrapped up and the circus would soon be on its way. Marsha's friends and quite a few of the cast and crew were staying for the party on Sat.u.r.day. After the farewells, La Sirena Verde would be a haven of tranquility once more. Solley smiled, thinking how relieved Janie would be. No matter how lucrative the deal, she would be glad to get her beach back.

Solley, too, was glad these few weeks of mayhem were offi cially over. It had been a strange and eventful summer vacation for her. A summer love and a new outlook on her life had turned her and Dan's world upside down. But she had made her decision and had spent the past fi ve days drumming it into a stupefi ed Dan that she did not want to start over or try again. That though they had children to love and raise, they did not have to emotionally cripple each other.

a 153 a Solley would be a good mother to their children, but now she wanted that divorce that had hung over her head for far too long. Between them they would look after their children, prioritize them, and do only what was best for them. And to start off as she meant to go on, she had promptly told Dan to take a turn parenting full time while Solley stayed at La Sirena Verde to help Janie prepare for a cast party and to spend time with her little sister Grace.

She had even packed the kids' clothing and thrown their bags into the trunk of Dan's car, ignoring her protests. Since Dan knew so much about being a good parent and keeping their family safe, Solley fi gured it was time for her to translate talk into action. She and Janie had hysterics as Dan drove away, outnumbered and outmaneuvered.

Recalling her panicked face, Solley chuckled. She'd had fi ve days all to herself for the fi rst time since Jed was born, and she was never going back to being the frazzled, exhausted mother of three who'd arrived in Topaz Bay three weeks earlier. It was time to reclaim herself-the Solley who had seemed absent for so long she had almost vanished entirely.

With a slightly teary smile, she listened again to the voicemail message she'd saved. "Solley, I don't want to say good-bye, so it's good that you're not here. Whatever happens, you can trust that I care for you and the children and I always will. I hope you fi nd what you're looking for."

Gin's words soothed her and thrilled her and made her feel that anything was possible. Solley had thought about rushing to Vancouver as soon as Dan and the kids drove away, but she'd decided to take some time and clear her mind of all the c.r.a.p and chaos. She didn't believe that her feelings for Gin were some kind of rebound reaction, but she needed to be certain of herself before she saw Gin again. And she would see her again, no matter what. She owed herself that much.

a 154 a Feeling at peace for the fi rst time in years, she rolled on down into the bay, heading for Janie's house.

Shortly after Janie and Solley had prepared and served up a simple meal outdoors, a beat-up old Jeep came hurtling down the hill, throwing up a plume of dust and grit behind it.

The style of driving, rather than the vehicle, announced the visitor.

"Hey, Gracie's getting a little better at the ole timekeeping lark. She's here early," Solley observed wryly.

"But always in time for a meal," Janie said. "I guess that's her gift in this life."

"Yeah, that and pulling teeth. No surprises there," Marsha muttered darkly.

The old Jeep skidded to a gravelly halt beside Solley's car.

The door was kicked open and the youngest of the Rayner sisters jumped out. She bounded up to the deck to be enthusiastically hugged by her siblings. Visually, she was a variation on the family theme, blond like Janie but with mischievous brown eyes rather than the fl ashing green of her sisters. Height-wise, she fell somewhere between the two. Temper-wise, she was way out there with Solley, but she had a healthy share of Janie's shrewdness, too.

"My, it's like the new season of Charmed," Marsha remarked as the sisters fell into a group hug. "Or maybe Macbeth."

"Get your bags, Gracie, and I'll fi x you a plate of food,"

Janie ordered, pausing as she noticed the vast collection of bags and boxes piled up in the back of the Jeep. "How long were you actually planning on staying?"

Grace shuffl ed slightly. "Well, a little longer than the a 155 a weekend. I've been kicked out of school. I'll need to look around to see where I can complete my degree. But in the meantime I'm taking the rest of the year off."

Janie and Solley both spoke at once, talking over each other in a gabble of stunned accusation.

"Kicked out of school?"

"What the h.e.l.l did you do...steal drugs?"

"Push drugs?"

Grace looked miffed at the lack of sibling support. "No, I didn't steal or push drugs. But I was caught misappropriating the gas and air, and an articulator...on Debbie Steenson. She got suspended, and now she's not talking to me."

"Do I even want to know what an articulator is?" Solley asked in exasperation.

"Not in this context."

"I can't believe you'd throw away your education for some ditz," Janie scolded, hands on hips.

"Is Debbie Steenson hot?" Marsha wanted to know.

"Lava in a Pop-Tart."

"All right!" Marsha and Grace high-fi ved, much to Janie and Solley's disgust.

The fallout from this particular bombsh.e.l.l temporarily contained, they moved to the outdoor table and began their evening meal.

"You can start checking out schools online tomorrow, before the rest of the guests arrive," Janie said. "It'll be pretty crowded after that and you'll have no peace until everyone leaves again on Sunday."

"How many are staying over?" Solley asked.

"Well, we've got a pretty full house. Most people are staying down at the camp in the last of the trailers." Janie hesitated, exchanging a glance with Marsha.

"What's the chance of bagging the front guest suite?" Grace chanced her luck. "I hear Gin Ito left already? b.u.mmer."

a 156 a "Well." Janie shifted awkwardly. "As a matter of fact, Gin's coming back for the party." She darted a quick look at Solley.