"Touching only, clothes are optional, either here or upstairs."

I could still think clearly enough to realize that if we went upstairs we'd end up doing a h.e.l.l of a lot more than touching. "The clothes stay on, we stay here," I insisted.

"Deal, just don't stop doing that."

"What if I do this instead?"

"Awesome..." he groaned, capturing my mouth with his.

It was a little like dating in high school, feverishly hoping no one walked in before you got there, and we were both breathing hard by the time we collapsed against each other on the couch. I felt warm and tingly all over and very, very relaxed. I listened to Parker's heart beat against mine until we both calmed, neither one of us making a move to get up for the time being. Parts of me ached for something more, but it was enough.

"It just doesn't get any better than this," Parker murmured into my hair drowsily, and I sighed contentedly, snuggling deeper into his side on the couch.

Chapter Twenty.

I don't know when it happened exactly, but somewhere along the line I forgot to be self conscious around Parker.

Did my pregnant stomach get in the way between us sometimes?

Yep.

Did it feel weird?

Not so much.

It probably helped that he obviously didn't have an issue with it at all. Not only did he seem to like the way I looked at the end of my third trimester, he went out of his way to touch me in some small way every time we were together.

I don't know when it stopped bothering me if he kissed me at work, and when I started to think of Parker not as a friend or even a friend with benefits, but as my guy. It was as if canceling the wedding took off some kind of pressure to act a certain way and all of a sudden... I didn't feel pressure, I could just feel. And what I felt was real and good, and the best part of all was that he showed no signs of bolting every time he got a piece of news he didn't like.

As things between us grew more and more... awesome, I started sleeping in the master bedroom with him, even though we hadn't taken that final big step into NC-17 awesomeness yet. He didn't seem to be in too much of a hurry to reach that level of intimacy, but I did catch him giving Dr. Hathaway a wink when the doc okayed s.e.x to help induce contractions at my last check up.

In the last few weeks of my pregnancy, I wasn't feeling all that great though. Hot and uncomfortable, it proved impossible to sit comfortably for too long with my swelling girth. Not having air conditioning isn't normally a problem in Washington, but for about two weeks every year it gets swelteringly hot. It wasn't as bad as my third floor apartment, but it definitely added to my level of discomfort.

Despite the physical awkwardness, I kept working, though I didn't hustle drinks quite as fast as I could in my spry days. Thanks to my Grace, I didn't suffer too badly from low back pain or aching feet from being on them all day. Mostly I just felt big and unwieldy, all too ready for Bunny to put in an appearance so I could get my body back.

But when the first contraction hit me, I wasn't nearly as ready as I thought I'd be. The pain hit fast and hard, out of nowhere, and I dropped a full pitcher of beer before I remembered to try and breathe through it.

"Ooh, good job, b.u.t.terfingers," Jilly grinned, before she realized it was more than a slip of the hand. "Hey, are you alright?"

"Super," I bit out, still not getting the hang of the breathing thing while my insides felt like they were being torn apart. But then it started to ease, and I sucked in a shallow breath, holding tight to the bar while the pain faded. "I'm gonna go sit down for a few minutes. Can you help Luis at the bar for a bit?"

"No problem, go right ahead." Jilly watched me shuffle slowly to Parker's office, half hunched over as I recovered.

Parker took one look at me when I staggered through the door and I wished I'd had the presence of mind to make myself dim before entering. "What's wrong?" he demanded, coming out from behind his desk.

Suddenly, sitting in his office didn't sound so good. I wanted to lie down in comfort. "I think I'd better go on home."

"Is it the baby?"

"Just one contraction, nothing to get worried about, but if they keep coming steady I'll head over to the hospital and give you a call." I reached for my purse, but he plucked it out of my reach.

"Are you nuts? I'm coming with you."

"Parker, you know the first stages of labor can take hours and hours and we don't even know if these are those Braxton thingies or not." Though it sure didn't feel anything like a practice contraction.

"I'm not letting you drive my car. What if you crash it having another contraction?"

"That's what insurance is for." I reached for my purse again, coming away with it successfully. "Besides, if I feel another one come on, I'll pull over until it pa.s.ses." It sounded simple enough, but if I had a repeat incident like I did with the pitcher of beer, he definitely had cause to worry. Still, I stubbornly headed for the door with Parker hot on my heels.

"I'm not taking the chance and missing out on my daughter's birth. If it turns out to be nothing then fine. But I'm driving," he insisted, holding the door open for me.

I caught the slip, but didn't call him on it. I had other things on my mind as another contraction came hot on the heels of the first. "Motherfu..." I clenched my eyes shut against the pain, gripping the doorframe tightly. Was that supposed to happen? I'd thought they'd be more like ten or fifteen minutes apart to start with. I'd barely had a few minutes between them.

"Is everything okay? Jilly said you're going into labor." I heard Walter, the bouncer, ask, but I wasn't capable of answering yet.

"Looks like it," Parker replied, his voice thick with tension or excitement, maybe both.

"Do you need some help? I could carry her to the car."

The pain started to fade and I sucked in a greedy breath, taking in Walter's worried expression. He always was a sweet guy.

"I'm okay," I breathed, taking a step forward, but Parker wasn't so sure.

"No, if anyone's gonna carry her it'll be me." They argued over the best way to get me to the hospital, with Walter favoring calling an ambulance and Parker insisting he could get me there in half the time.

"Guys, I'm not an invalid, I'm having a baby," I interrupted. "Dr. H said walking is good during the first stages of labor. I'm sure I can..." I dropped my purse as another contraction hit, and a mewling sound I didn't recognize came out of my mouth as I fought to ride it out. That couldn't be normal.

"Just breathe," Parker said by my ear and I tried to do what he said, but it was tough to draw in a breath when every movement made the fire in my belly so much worse. I started to pant, sounding nothing like the breathing exercises in cla.s.s, but somehow it got me through it and I opened my eyes to see a small crowd of people gathered around me. "Okay, give me a hand with her. Jilly get the door. Luis, the next round's on the house." Walter stepped up on my other side, and between both men my feet barely touched the ground between the bar and the front door. I didn't argue any more, I just wanted to get to somewhere where I could lay down and die in privacy.

Not three steps into the parking lot I felt a warm rush of fluid and we all stared at the ground stupidly, paralyzed for a moment as my water broke. Under the harsh streetlight, I saw tinges of blood. It wasn't supposed to be b.l.o.o.d.y, was it? "Parker?"

"I'm gonna get you there, darlin', don't worry. Walter, hold her up, I'll go bring the car around." I felt myself handed off, but my sense of the pa.s.sage of time for Parker to get the car was severely warped by the onset of another contraction. Walter must have picked me up, because the next thing I knew, I was in the front seat of Parker's car.

Parker kept up a steady litany of supportive instructions as he drove like a bat out of h.e.l.l to the hospital. He remembered way more of the childbirth cla.s.s than I did, but nothing I was supposed to do to get through the pain did any good.

After another particularly strong one, I noticed I'd cracked the hand grip on the door handle from holding on too tightly. "It's not helping," I panted, out of breath. "I feel like I'm gonna split in two."

"We're almost there. It'll be alright, I promise."

I caught his expression though, there was definitely fear behind his eyes.

Thanks to the pre-registration process, checking into the hospital went swifter than checking into a hotel, and I was wheeled up to the labor and delivery floor within minutes. Somehow I'd gotten it into my brain that once I got to the hospital everything would be okay, but the pain didn't lessen as Parker helped me change into a hospital gown and climb onto the bed.

"This is crazy, I'm gonna have the nurse give you something to kill the pain." Parker reached for the nurse call b.u.t.ton after we'd been left alone for a few minutes, but I shook my head.

"No, no drugs." I couldn't take a chance it might affect Bunny adversely. And if there was a problem, I wanted to be in my right mind to deal with it. Sure, the pain was awful, but so far it wasn't more than I could handle. Besides, women had been giving birth drug free for thousands of years. I could handle it. G.o.d, I was stupid.

The nurse arrived all the same, so Parker must have pressed the b.u.t.ton. Asking me a zillion questions, she paused patiently when I couldn't answer due to the pain, picking up again as if nothing happened once it pa.s.sed.

"Did you call Dr. Hathaway?" I managed to get in a question of my own.

"He's not on call tonight. Dr. Helfer is going to attend to you," she replied with a friendly smile.

"What? But Hathaway is supposed to be here, he said we could call..." Another contraction hit, I could have sworn they were coming faster.

"I'll go call him, Merce."

"No, don't leave me." I held onto his hand with a deathgrip, and I saw him wince. Forcing myself to loosen my hold before I broke him like I broke his car door, I pleaded with him to stay. "Please, Parker."

"I'll do whatever you want, sweetheart." He brushed the hair away from my brow and kissed my forehead. "Nurse, we were led to believe it'd be her own OB/GYN to deliver the baby."

"Right, and it probably will be when she's ready to deliver sometime tomorrow morning," she nodded. "But there's no need to wake him up now, it'll probably be hours yet before she's ready to push. You want him to be well rested, don't you?"

I officially hated the friendly nurse with a pa.s.sion. How was I supposed to survive for hours? A scream caught in the back of my throat as I felt another contraction hit, followed by a rush of warmth. Something was wrong, I could tell.

"Oh, my G.o.d." I heard Parker say by my side. "That's not... it's not supposed to do that is it?"

"Sweet Mary..." she breathed. "I'll go get the doctor."

"What is it? What's wrong?" I whimpered, too weak to lift my head off the pillow to see what had them freaked out.

"It's gonna be fine, Mercy. They'll know what to do."

I could tell he didn't believe it though. My head lolled to one side and I caught sight of deep, red stains on the sheets below my waist. "No... no, this can't... I can't..." Fat tears rolled down my cheeks as another wave of pain tore through me and I somehow found the breath to scream, not caring who heard me anymore.

"Don't leave me, okay?" My voice was little more than a croak when it pa.s.sed.

"I'll never leave you, Mercy. I love you." He kissed the back of my hand, holding it over his heart.

I believed him. And all at once I knew I felt the same way. "I love you too, Parker. I thought you should know, just in case..."

"Don't..." his brows twitched together. "It's fine. We're in the hospital, they know exactly what to do. In ten minutes we'll have a perfect baby girl and you get an interesting new scar for bikini season." He gave a fair approximation of his regular grin.

"Parker, that's..." I couldn't talk, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't even scream as the pain intensified. Dimly, I became aware of other people in the room, and a flurry of activity around me. A dizzying sensation swept over me as I was moved to a gurney and I felt Parker drop my hand. "Parker..." I struggled to call out to him, but I don't think I made any noise.

"I'm right behind you. It'll be okay, angel, you'll see."

My last fleeting thought was that I hoped to G.o.d he was right and I lived to see them both before I slipped into the comforting embrace of darkness.

Chapter Twenty-One.

I hate hospitals.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned that before, but you can probably guess why. Nothing against the people who work in them. I've met my share of helpful staff, that's not my beef at all. Even before I almost died in one, they made me uncomfortable, and since the c.o.c.ktail of Sam, Adam and Raziel's Grace made me more than human, I had extra reason to be uneasy.

Nothing good ever seemed to come from a hospital stay. Not to say they didn't save lives and all, but in general, hospital = bad times in my books. I'd almost started to convince myself that it could all change with the baby coming though. Finally, a happy reason to go to the hospital. I'd gone through the tour with an open mind, and was impressed with the friendly and knowledgeable staff there.

But when I woke up alone in the darkened hospital room, I knew I shouldn't have been so optimistic.

I had on a fresh hospital gown, covered in little blue flowers. No sign of blood or anything to indicate how bad things had gotten. It took me a few seconds to realize there wasn't any sign of the baby either, my flat (well, flatter) stomach being the only clue I'd delivered her. I didn't feel any pain, just a general soreness around my abdominal area.

So where was my Bunny?

Or Parker for that matter? Then again, who knew how long I'd been out cold? Maybe he was with her? Or getting a cup of coffee or something?

Looking around for the nurse call b.u.t.ton, I found it looped around the bedrail and was in the process of reaching for it when the toilet flushed in the bathroom. Flooded with relief, I sat higher, expecting Parker to come through the door, but it was Daphne who opened it.

"Oh, you're awake," she smiled sunnily. "Great, now I can open some of these curtains, huh?" Without pausing she went to the windows and I realized it was actually mid-afternoon.

"Where's Parker?" I asked, swallowing against the dryness in my throat. Somehow I thought my voice should be worn out from screaming, but I supposed I had the Grace to thank for healing it.

"He'll be up in a minute. He went down to get you some ice cream."

An odd choice, I thought, but it eased my mind. Ice cream sounded celebratory. Pushing the b.u.t.ton to sit upright, I tested my range of motion, and everything seemed to be in working order, that had to be a good sign too. "Did everything go alright?"

"Like a charm," she grinned. "You should rest your voice though."

Ignoring the advice, I didn't bother to remind her about the healing Grace. "But they whisked me in there so fast, how is she?" I pressed, needing to hear she'd come through it alright.

"You're fine."

"No, how is Bunny? Is she healthy?" Is she normal?

"Bunny?" She stared at me blankly.

Parker stuck his head in, smiling once he saw me up and talking. "Hey, how's my girl? They didn't have any chocolate, but I got mint chip. I figured that might be more soothing anyway. How are you feeling?" He leaned down to kiss my forehead.

"I'd be better if you could tell me everything went down alright. Did they have to do emergency surgery?"

"No, the doc said it all went like clockwork. You're gonna be fine."

"But what about Bunny? Is she okay? I'd like to see her."

Parker traded looks with Daphne and she shrugged. "I don't know, she asked about that before. You want me to stop by your place and pick up a stuffed animal?"

They had to be s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g with me. It was annoying, but at least I had the comfort of knowing they wouldn't joke around like that if she was really sick or worse. "Funny, guys. I'd like to see my baby now if it's all the same to you."