Every Man in His Humor - Part 13
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Part 13

Kit.

I thank you heartily, Thomas: give me your hand: With all my heart, good Thomas. I have, Thomas, A secret to impart unto you---but, When once you have it, I must seal your lips up; So far I tell you, Thomas.

Cash. Sir, for that---

Kit.

Nay, hear me out. Think I esteem you, Thomas, When I will let you in thus to my private.

It is a thing sits nearer to my crest, Than thou art 'ware of, Thomas; if thou should'st Reveal it, but---

Cash. How, I reveal it?

Kit. Nay, I do not think thou would'st; but if thou should'st, 'Twere a great weakness.

Cash. A great treachery: Give it no other name.

Kit. Thou wilt not do't, then?

Cash.

Sir, if I do, mankind disclaim me ever!

Kit.

He will not swear, he has some reservation, Some conceal'd purpose, and close meaning sure; Else, being urg'd so much, how should he choose But lend an oath to all this protestation?

He's no precisian, that I'm certain of, Nor rigid Roman Catholic: he'll play At fayles, and tick-tack; I have heard him swear.

What should I think of it? urge him again, And by some other way! I will do so.

Well, Thomas, thou hast sworn not to disclose:--- Yes, you did swear?

Cash.

Not yet, sir, but I will, Please you---

Kit.

No, Thomas, I dare take thy word, But, if thou wilt swear, do as thou think'st; good; I am resolv'd without It; at thy pleasure.

Cash.

By my soul's safety then, sir, I protest, My tongue shall ne'er take knowledge of a word Deliver'd me in nature of your trust.

Kit.

It is too much; these ceremonies need not: I know thy faith to be as firm as rock.

Thomas, come hither, near; we cannot be Too private in this business. So it is,--- Now he has sworn, I dare the safelier venture. [Aside.

I have of late, by divers observations--- But whether his oath can bind him, yea, or no, Being not taken lawfully? ha! say you?

I will ask council ere I do proceed:---- [Aside.

Thomas, it will be now too long to stay, I'll spy some fitter time soon, or to-morrow.

Cash. Sir, at your pleasure.

Kit. I will think:-and, Thomas, I pray you search the books 'gainst my return, For the receipts 'twixt me and Traps.

Cash. I will, sir.

Kit.

And hear you, if your mistress's brother, Wellbred, Chance to bring hither any gentleman, Ere I come back, let one straight bring me word.

Cash. Very well, sir.

Kit.

To the Exchange, do you hear?

Or here in Coleman-street, to justice Clement's.

Forget it not, nor be not out of the way.

Cash. I will not, sir.

Kit. I pray you have a care on't.

Or, whether he come or no, if any other, Stranger, or else; fail not to send me word.

Cash. I shall not, sir.

Kit. Be it your special business Now to remember it.

Cash. Sir, I warrant you.

Kit.

But, Thomas, this is not the secret, Thomas, I told you of.

Cash. No, sir; I do suppose it.

Kit. Believe me, it is not.

Cash. Sir, I do believe you.

Kit.

By heaven it is not, that's enough: but, Thomas, I would not you should utter it, do you see, To any creature living; yet I care not.

Well, I must hence. Thomas, conceive thus much; It was a trial of you, when I meant So deep a secret to you, I mean not this, But that I have to tell you; this is nothing, this.

But, Thomas, keep this from my wife, I charge you, Lock'd up in silence, midnight, buried here.--- No greater h.e.l.l than to be slave to fear. [Exit.

Cash.

Lock'd up in silence, midnight, buried here!

Whence should this flood of pa.s.sion, trow, take head? ha!

Best dream no longer of this running humour, For fear I sink; the violence of the stream Already hath transported me so far, That I can feel no ground at all: but soft--- Oh, 'tis our water-bearer: somewhat has crost him now.

Enter COB, hastily.

Cob. Fasting-days! what tell you me of fasting days? 'Slid, would they were all on a light fire for me! they say the whole world shall be consumed with fire one day, but would I had these Ember-weeks and villanous Fridays burnt in the mean time, and then--

Cash. Why, how now, Cob? what moves thee to this choler, ha?

Cob. Collar, master Thomas! I scorn your collar, I, sir; I am none O' your cart-horse, though I carry and draw water. An you offer to ride me with your collar or halter either, I may hap shew you a jade's trick, sir.

Cash. O, you'll slip your head out of the collar? why, goodman Cob, you mistake me.

Cob. Nay, I have my rheum, and I can be angry as well as another, sir.