Entangled.

By Maria V. Ciletti.

Dedication.

To Rose, my partner, my spouse, and my super hero.

Acknowledgments.

In memory of my mother, Donna Ciletti Infante. There are no words to describe how much I miss you.

To K.J. Satrum and Diana Prindle for their help with my research in Erie, Pa.

To Tara Young, thank you for your editing expertise To Deb Weaver, attorney at law, for allowing me to interview her regarding the legal aspects of this story.

To Talia Hagler, reporter for Channel 21 news, for your input, as well.

Chapter One.

At four o'clock in the morning, Hayden Crissman couldn't fall back to sleep. She had the dream about her English teacher Miss Spencer again. She knew it was wrong, but in a way, it felt so right.

The box fan in the window of her attic bedroom barely made a difference as it circulated the thick humid air. She sat up in bed, and her thick caramel-colored hair cascaded over her shoulders as she hugged her knees to her chest, the damp sheets rumpled around her.

It was her last day at St. Mary's High School. She would take her final exam in the morning, and for the first time in her life, she would be free. Free from homework, free from studying, free from getting up at the crack of dawn. Free for a few months anyway, until she started the nursing program in September at Mercyhurst College in western Pennsylvania. Hayden always wanted to go into nursing. "To help people." She felt her best when she was able to do that.

Giving up on sleep, she stretched her long lean legs and got up and sat at her desk. Careful not to make too much noise and wake her mother, she switched on the gooseneck lamp and opened her geometry book. Tucked in between pages seventy-two and seventy-three was the card she bought at Walgreens for Miss Spencer.

Even though Hayden hadn't been in Miss Spencer's English cla.s.s since she was a junior, Miss Spencer took the time to help Hayden fill out the paperwork and cut through the red tape involved to get her scholarship. Without it, Hayden would never be able to go to college. She was very thankful and wanted to show her appreciation.

Hayden glanced over what she wrote for the fifth time. It was simple, just a thank you for her help and encouragement. She closed the card and slipped it back in its envelope. She settled in and glanced over a few equations that might be on the final exam. Bored with the geometry, she closed the book, reached into the bottom desk drawer, and pulled out the worn red leather-bound notebook and began to write: Dear Diary, I had the dream again: The dream where Miss Spencer and I are walking on a beach and the sun is setting. The sky is ruby red, and I can feel the warm breeze on my skin. We walk out on a sandbar, and Miss Spencer reaches over and takes my hand. She turns toward me and looks into my eyes, then she leans in and kisses me. The kiss is soft and sweet, and I don't want her to stop...and then I wake up. Why would I be having these dreams, dear diary? Does this mean I'm a lesbian? I don't want to be gay. I don't want to be a freak.

Hayden closed the notebook, folded her arms across it, and laid her head down. The dream about Miss Spencer disturbed her because it aroused feelings in her she didn't understand. Why wasn't she like all the other girls in her cla.s.s who were boy crazy? Was it just general admiration or a schoolgirl crush that she felt? Wasn't she too old for that? And anyway, why Miss Spencer? If she was going to have a crush on a teacher, wouldn't it be on Mr. Gennero? All the girls, including her best friend, Calli Karra, drooled over Mr. Gennero. His dark Italian looks set many a schoolgirl's heart aflame. But not Hayden's. She had other feelings-feelings she thought separated her from everyone else-and those feelings were so frustrating that they kept her up some nights.

Although Hayden was shy, especially around boys, she did date boys. Well, a boy, if you count going to the spring formal with Jimmy Robson. The date ended badly when she pulled away from him as he tried to kiss her in the backseat of his dad's Chevy Suburban. What was she supposed to do? His dad was right there in the front seat. It's not that she didn't like boys. They could be a lot of fun, like her friends Nick and Don. Nick, who sat in front of her in history cla.s.s, could make her laugh until tears ran down her cheeks. Don was her lab partner in biology who would sneak in Payday candy bars and share with her. They were nice guys, and she felt comfortable with them, but that was all they were-friends. Anyway, her mom said she should concentrate more on her studies instead of her social life. Hayden thought she was afraid that what happened to her- getting pregnant too soon and having her chances of going to college ruined-might happen to Hayden.

Although Hayden didn't date regularly, she didn't consider herself a lonely person. Having Calli as her best friend, with her boy-crazy lifestyle, was all the social life Hayden could handle right now. Calli was a love 'em and leave 'em type girl. Even though she went on many dates, the relationships never lasted longer than a month or two.

Hayden heard her mother's alarm clock go off downstairs. She got up and made her bed, grabbed a clean uniform skirt and white blouse from her closet one last time, and headed down to the bathroom to take a shower. The smell of fresh-brewed coffee permeated the air.

"Good morning. How did you sleep, honey?" Hayden's mother, Sara, asked.

"Okay, I guess." Hayden rubbed her eyes with the heels of both hands. b.u.t.terflies fluttered in her stomach as snippets of the dream flashed in Hayden's head. She briefly closed her eyes tight, trying to block them out.

Her mother poured herself a cup of coffee and sat at the kitchen table. Long lashes swept across delicate pale cheekbones as she ran a hand through her short curly chestnut brown hair. "I can't believe this is your last day of high school."

"Me either." Hayden opened a box of blueberry Pop-Tarts that were on the counter and removed the last one. She dropped the pastry into the toaster and poured herself a cup of coffee. She'd been drinking coffee for over a year now. Sometimes it was what she needed to stay awake during the boring geography and civics cla.s.ses.

"When I finish work today, we'll go over and pick up your new car," her mother said.

Hayden smiled. "Great, Mom, thanks." Hayden knew that "new car" meant older model used car. A silver 1999 Honda Civic hatchback to be specific. Since Hayden didn't have any money to contribute to the cost of the car, she had little say in what her mother decided on. She had hoped for something cool like a Chevy Camaro or that car from the cute TV commercial with the hamsters, the neat-looking Kia Soul. But she knew her mom, and her mom was practical. Anyway, she was happy with Civic-it was a step up from what she had now, which was taking the bus everywhere. As she munched on her Pop-Tart and sipped her coffee, Hayden looked out the kitchen window and saw a thin orange line of light appear at the top of Chestnut Street. If she didn't leave soon, she'd miss the bus.

"I gotta get going. Calli will be waiting at the bus stop. She gets all freaked out if I'm late." Hayden kissed her mother on the cheek, grabbed her books, and headed toward the bus stop.

As she walked up Chestnut Street, her cotton parochial school blouse clung to her back. That June morning was one of the hottest she could remember for northeastern Ohio.

As Hayden walked down the street toward the bus stop, she turned around and looked at the place she called home. Hayden and Sara had lived in the two-story duplex with a saggy front porch since Hayden was in the second grade. During elementary school, Hayden had been a latchkey kid since her mom worked two jobs to keep a roof over their heads.

Sara Crissman worked as a cashier at the A&P during the day and cleaned offices in the Farmers National Bank Building downtown in the evenings. Sometimes she didn't get home until seven or eight o'clock at night. During those times, Mr. Mahoney and his wife, Emma, made it a point to check on Hayden and make sure she had something to eat and was safe. Emma would bring over pasta and meatb.a.l.l.s with tomato sauce and homemade peach or apple pie for dessert.

Calli was waiting for Hayden when she reached the top of the hill. She stood up from the curb, her body tall and lithe, her spiky black hair glistening in the morning light.

"I was afraid you weren't going to make it," Calli said.

"I'm draggin' this morning. Couldn't sleep last night."

"You can't be worried about your final. You practically aced the two you took yesterday."

"That's not it. I don't know..." Thankfully, the school bus arrived, sparing Hayden the need to explain further.

She and Calli boarded the bus, and Hayden smiled a h.e.l.lo to Mae the driver and the other St. Mary's students who were scattered throughout the green leather seats. The doors squeaked closed, and Hayden lunged forward down the aisle as the bus resumed its route. Hayden took a seat near the back, and Calli sat across from her. Hayden watched out the window as the dilapidated buildings of her hometown went by.

So many stores were closed and buildings boarded up. Even the big Chevy dealer on the corner went out of business last year. This was the Rust Belt, the place where they made cars, but ever since they shut down the steel mills, not many businesses could survive here.

It would be a thirty-minute ride to school as usual, so maybe she could catch a nap on the bus. As the town rolled by, sleep didn't come. Instead Hayden thought about her last day as a high school student and what the future had in store for her. Oh, there were things she would miss about St. Mary's. She would miss her friends who were going far away to college. She would miss her library job, and she would miss some of her teachers, especially Miss Spencer. One thing she wouldn't miss would be riding this bus every morning at the crack of dawn.

She was excited about going to pick up her car later. The week before, she and her mother went to Fast Eddie's Miracle Motors, a seedy used car lot downtown, and bought a car so Hayden could drive herself to her summer job in Erie and to Mercyhurst College in the fall. She would be packing up the car the next morning, and she and Calli would go to Erie and start their summer jobs working in food service at Waldameer Park.

Hayden was also excited about the new job. Not necessarily because of the work she would be doing, but because for the first time, she would be out of Youngstown, out on her own and making her own money. She and Calli would leave Sat.u.r.day morning to move into the two-bedroom cottage they were renting for the summer.

She thought for a moment about her high school years. She could have gone to the public school, but her mother felt Hayden would get a better education at a parochial school where the cla.s.ses were smaller. It wasn't easy to go to St. Mary's. Hayden was in the tuition reduction program for students whose family couldn't afford the full cost. Requirements included the student maintaining a 3.5 grade-point average and partic.i.p.ating in a varsity sport or working after school.

To get the reduction, Hayden partic.i.p.ated in the track program during the fall each year. She started out running the eight hundred- and fifteen hundred-meter races and eventually went on to run cross-country. During the offseason, she worked after school in the library.

For two hours each night after school, she reshelved the returned books. She would repair or recover any damaged books, dust the twenty rows of bookshelves, and run the sweeper. She liked having the library to herself. And she took pride in her work, just like her mother had taught her.

Sometimes when she finished in the library, she would change into her gym clothes and run a few laps around the outside track. Even though track season was over, Hayden liked to run. It helped to clear her head. She especially loved running when the seasons were changing. She marveled in the fall at seeing the leaves that were once a rich emerald green turn golden yellow or fiery red before falling to the ground. In the spring, pink buds would appear and explode with colors of purple and fuchsia. Usually, the track was deserted, but on occasion, other students and the more ambitious faculty would be running. One of the faculty members who used to run was Miss Spencer. Hayden's heart would skip a beat as she'd watch Miss Spencer's smooth, toned legs glisten with sweat as she pa.s.sed Hayden on the track.

Abbey Spencer probably wasn't an athlete in her college days. She seemed to put forth a great effort to stay in shape as she ran around the track. One of the few lay teachers at St. Mary's, Miss Spencer played a big part in Hayden's decision to go to college. Miss Spencer's upbeat personality and positive outlook made her one of the most well-liked teachers at St. Mary's. The fact that she was easy on the eyes didn't hurt.

Soon the bus pulled up to the front doors of St. Mary's, breaking Hayden from her thoughts.

"I'll catch you later, Hay. Good luck on your test."

"You too. See you back here when you're done."

Calli headed down the east hall toward the cla.s.sroom where her English final would take place.

Hayden's footsteps echoed in the deserted halls of the west wing. Most of the seniors had finished with their exams earlier in the week. But Hayden took Geometry II so it would look good on her application for Mercyhurst, and Friday was the only day Sister Mary Kevin was giving her finals.

Hayden walked to her locker for the last time. The locker was empty except for a couple of number two pencils she would need for her tests. Hayden had already turned in most of her textbooks to the librarian, her former boss, Sister Mary Rose, or Sister Mary Shh, as Hayden's cla.s.smates affectionately called her. The students at St. Mary's had nicknames for all the nuns who taught there: Sister Mary Francis, who taught art, was Sister Mary Art Teacher; Sister Eugene, the a.s.sistant princ.i.p.al, was Sister Mary Detention; and Sister Mary Claire, the gym teacher, was known as Sister Mary Dodgeball.

With the sharpened pencils in hand, Hayden took a seat in Sister Mary Kevin's-Sister Mary Protractor-cla.s.sroom to take her geometry final. The bell rang. A few stragglers took their seats as Sister Mary Kevin pa.s.sed out the exams. The smell of mimeograph fluid wafted up from the test paper. Hayden inhaled deeply. She loved this smell. She didn't know why, but it felt comforting to her.

She finished her exam in forty-five minutes and turned in her test materials at the front of the room. Hayden's senior year ended without incident as she walked down the empty hall, took the card she had for Miss Spencer out of her book, and put it in her purse. She then returned her geometry book to the library.

She walked down the hall to Miss Spencer's cla.s.sroom, but the room was empty. Hayden walked up and down the hall and walked over to the teacher's lounge, but there was no sign of Miss Spencer. With a heavy heart, Hayden went outside the gla.s.s double doors with several other kids and waited for the bus that would take them home.

A few minutes later, Miss Spencer shouldered her way out through the same doors. She was carrying a cardboard box filled with books and had the straps from a brown leather book briefcase and her purse slung over her shoulder.

"Finished already, Hayden?" She stopped and adjusted the strap on her briefcase.

"Yes, Miss Spencer." Miss Spencer had honey golden hair, which was pulled back into a neat ponytail, and a killer smile that made Hayden's knees weak. She looked down at her shoes, finding it difficult to make eye contact with the attractive teacher. She should ask Miss Spencer if she needed help carrying her stuff, but Hayden was so tongue-tied, she could barely speak.

"Great. Well, have a nice summer. And best of luck to you at Mercyhurst. It's a great school. I know you'll do well there." Miss Spencer smiled, and Hayden's heart skipped a beat. The card, give her the card echoed in her mind. Hayden's face flushed as she remembered her dream.

"Miss Spencer, I have something for you. It's nothing special...I...uh...just wanted to say thank you for everything you've done for me." Hayden pulled the card out of her purse and handed it to her.

Miss Spencer smiled. "Why, thank you, what a nice gesture." Miss Spencer slid the card into her briefcase. "Thank you so much."

Miss Spencer walked up to a white Mustang convertible, slid her key into the lock, and opened the door. She flipped up the red leather front seat and struggled with the awkward load of books, purse, and briefcase. She dropped her keys in the process, and when she bent down to pick them up, her skirt hiked up.

b.u.t.terflies stirred in Hayden's belly as she watched Miss Spencer from a distance. Feeling guilty, she looked away.

"What are you doing?" Calli asked as she joined Hayden.

Hayden jumped. She turned away to hide her embarra.s.sment. "Nothing. Waiting for the bus." She tried to change the subject. "I really wish my mom would have let me drive to school. I feel like a little kid having to take the bus."

"Yeah. Me too. Hey, what kind of car did your mom end up buying you anyway? Last time I talked to you, she was looking at that old Pontiac station wagon with the fake wood paneling that Eddie has up front on the lot. I hope that's not what she settled on. That thing is a tank. I heard he drops cigarette b.u.t.ts into the radiator to stop it from leaking." Calli reached into her purse and pulled out a pack of Juicy Fruit gum. She offered the open pack to Hayden. "Want one?"

Hayden took a piece of gum, unwrapped it, and folded it into her mouth. "A 1999 Honda Civic hatchback."

"You're kidding, right?" Calli asked, chomping on her gum.

"Nope."

"That thing is almost as old as we are. Does it still run?"

"Apparently so. Eddie said it had at least another twenty thousand miles in it. Mom was pretty excited because she got a ninety-day warranty out of the deal. So at least it'll get us up to Erie and through the summer."

Hayden and Calli sat on one of the brick retaining walls that flanked the school entrance. The bus was late.

"You start packing yet?" Hayden asked.

Calli shook her head. "I'm not sure what to bring. Aren't they going to give us uniforms to work in?"

"Yeah, I guess so. We have to be at the park Monday morning for orientation. So with graduation being Sat.u.r.day morning, that only gives us a little more than a day to move in and get settled. Did you decide if you're going to graduation?"

"Mom's making me go. She said she didn't pay all that money to not see me walk across the stage at Powers Auditorium."

"My mom called off work to be there, so I have to go, too. Anyway, it won't be so bad. Look at it as one final party before we leave this place."

As Hayden and Calli waited for the bus, they watched Miss Spencer pull out of the teachers' parking lot with the convertible top down. They waved as she drove by. The car's tires screeched as Miss Spencer turned the corner and onto the main street.

"Now that's a cool car," Calli said.

"Yep. Really cool." But Hayden was thinking about something else.

Chapter Two.

Abbey got behind the wheel of her Mustang convertible and practically peeled out of the school parking lot. Now that the year was over, she was free from playing the respectable teacher and planned to let her hair down and let loose.

It wasn't that she didn't enjoy her job teaching English to high schoolers. It was a challenge, especially for someone new. Even with recent changes in the government, Don't Ask Don't Tell was alive and well in the parochial school system. Being found out was the one fatal flaw every gay teacher knew could never be forgiven. That's why Abbey was always hyper vigilant when she was alone with a student to have the cla.s.sroom door open or be in a common area where her actions were easily seen. She worked too hard to get her teaching degree and felt lucky to have her job at St. Mary's. It took a lot of work to hold up the squeaky clean image of a schoolteacher, and sometimes it took a lot out of her.

"Free at last," she said as she headed toward the small house she rented through the school year. She pulled her cell phone from her purse and punched in Ann's number. The warm June breeze ruffled her honey blond hair all about her face as she waited for Ann to pick up. This time the next day, she would be back in Presque Isle, sharing the beach house she rented every summer with Ann, the love of her life.

This past winter had been rough on their relationship. She wanted this summer to be romantic and an opportunity to get reacquainted with Ann-to reclaim the ardent pa.s.sion they once shared.

After about seven rings, the call went to voice mail. Disappointment pinged in Abbey's heart. That's okay. She's probably busy with last-minute meetings. I'm sure many loose ends need tying up before summer break.

Abbey snapped the phone closed, turned up the radio, and sang along with Taylor Swift. She pulled into the driveway of the rental house and struggled up the front walk as she juggled her purse, briefcase, and the last load of books from her cla.s.sroom. When she opened the front door, the scent of Pine-Sol lingered in the air from her cleaning marathon the previous night. She wanted the place to be in good shape so the landlord Mr. Mahoney wouldn't have much to do if he got renters during the summer.

Abbey kicked off her high heels in the doorway of her kitchen, then dumped the load she was carrying on the wooden dinette table. She walked over to check the answering machine on the counter. No new messages.