_That in the gla.s.se of thy Truth Shee may see thee in those Mercies which thou hast offered to us in thy Son Jesus Christ, our onely Saviour, and serve thee in all those holy Duties, which most agree with his holy Doctrine, and most imitable example._

_The experience we have of the vanitie and uncertaintie of all humane Glorie and Greatnesse in our scatterings and eclypses, let it make us both so much the more ambitious to be invested in those durable Honours and perfections which are onely to be found in thy self, and obtained throuqh Jesus Christ._

8. _Upon His Majesties repulse at_ Hull, _and the fates of the_ Hothams.

My repulse at _Hull_ seemed at the first view an act of so rude disloyalty, that my greatest Enemies had scarce confidence enough to abett or own it: It was the first overt Essay to be made, how patiently I could bear the losse of my Kingdoms.

G.o.d knows, it affected me more with shame and sorrow for others, then with anger for my Self; nor did the affront done to me, trouble me so much as their sin, which admitted no colour or excuse.

I was resolved how to bear this, and much more with patience: But I foresaw they could hardly contain themselves within the compa.s.s of this one unworthy act, who had effrontery enough to commit or countenance it. This was but the hand of that cloud, which was soon after to overspread the whole Kingdom, and cast all into disorder and darkness.

For 'tis among the wicked Maximes of bold and disloyall undertakers: That bad actions must always be seconded with worse, and rather not begun, then not carried on; for they think the retreat more dangerous then the a.s.sault, and hate repentance more then perseverance in a fault.

This gave me to see clearly thorow all the pious disguises, and soft palliations of some men; whose words were sometime smoother then oil, but now I saw they would prove very swords.

Against which I having (as yet) no defence, but that of a good Conscience, thought it My best policie (with patience) to bear what I could not remedie: And in this (I thank G.o.d) I had the better of _Hotham_, that no disdain, or emotion of pa.s.sion transported Me, by the indignitie of his carriage, to do or say any thing unbeseeming My self, or unsuitable to that temper, which, in greatest injuries, I think, best becomes a Christian, as coming nearest to the great example of Christ.

And indeed, I desire alwaies more to remember I am a Christian, then a King; for what the Majesty of one might justly abhor, the Charity of the other is willing to bear; what the height of a King tempteth to revenge, the humilitie of a Christian teacheth to forgive, keeping in compa.s.s all those impotent pa.s.sions, whose excess injures a man more then his greatest enemies can; for these give their malice a full impression on our souls, which otherwise cannot reach very far, nor do us much hurt.

I cannot but observe how G.o.d not long after so pleaded and avenged my cause, in the eye of the world, that the most wilfully blind cannot avoid the displeasure to see it, and with some remorse and fears to own it as a notable stroke, and prediction of divine vengeance.

First, Sir _John Hotham_ unreproched, unthreatned, uncursed by any language or secret imprecation of mine, onely blasted with the conscience of his own wickednesse, and falling from one inconstancy to another, not long after paies his own and his eldest Sons heads, as forfeiture of their disloyalty, to those men, from whom surely he might have expected an other reward, then thus to divide their heads from their bodies, whose hearts with them were divided from their KING.

Nor is it strange that they who employed them at first in so high a service, and so successfull to them, should not finde mercy enough to forgive Him, who had so much premerited of them: For, Apostacy unto Loyalty some men account the most unpardonable sin.

Nor did a solitary vengeance serve the turn, the cutting off one head in a Family is not enough to expiate the affront done to the head of the Common-weal. The eldest Son must be involved in the punishment, as he was infected with the sin of the Father, against the Father of his Country: Root and branch G.o.d cuts off in one day.

These Observations are obvious to every fancie: G.o.d knows, I was so far from rejoycing in the _Hothams_ ruine, (though it were such as was able to give the greatest thirst for revenge a full draught, being executed by them who first employed him against Me) that I so far pitied him, as I thought he at first acted more against the light of his Conscience, then I hope many other men do in the same Cause.

For, he was never thought to be of that superst.i.tious sowrenesse which some men pretend to in matters of Religion, which so darkens their judgment, that they cannot see any thing of Sin and Rebellion in those means they use, with intents to reform to their Models, of what they call Religion, who think all is gold of Piety, which doth but glister with a shew of Zeal and Fervencie.

Sir _John Hotham_ was (I think) a man of another temper, and so most liable to those downright temptations of Ambition, which have no cloak or cheat of Religion to impose upon themselves or others.

That which makes me more pitie him, is, that after he began to have some inclinations towards a repentance for his sin, and reparation of his duty to Me, he should be so unhappie as to fall into the hands of their Justice, and not my mercie, who could as willingly have forgiven him, as he could have asked that favor of Me.

For I think clemency a debt which we ought to pay to those that crave it, when we have cause to believe they would not after abuse it, since G.o.d himself suffers us not to pray any thing for his mercie, but only praiers and praises.

Poor Gentleman, he is now become a noteable monument of unprosperous disloialtie, teaching the world by so bad and unfortunate a spectacle, that the rude carriage of a Subject towards his Soveraign carries alwaies its own vengeance, & an unseparable shadow with it, and those oft prove the most fatall, and implacable Executioners of it, who were the first Imployers in the service.

After-times will dispute it, whether _Hotham_ were more infamous at _Hull_, or at _Tower-hill_; though 'tis certain that no punishment so stains a mans Honour, as wilfull expectations of unworthy actions; which besides the conscience of the sin, brands with most indeliable characters of infamy, the name and memory to posterity, who not engaged in the Faction of the times, have the most impartiall reflections on their actions.

_But thou, O Lord, who hast in so remarkable a way avenged thy Servant, suffer me not to take any secret pleasure in it, for as his death hath satisfied the injury he did to me, so let me not by it gratifie any pa.s.sion in me, lest I make thy vengeance to be mine, and consider the affront against me, more than the sin against thee._

_Thou indeed, without any desire or endevor of mine, hast made his mischief to return on his own head, and his violent dealing to come down on his own pate._

_Thou hast pleaded my cause, even before the sons of men, and taken the matter into thine own hands; that men may know it was thy work and see that thou, Lord, hast done it._

_I do not, I dare not say, so let mine enemies perish._

_O Lord! yea Lord, rather give them repentance pardon and impunity, if it be thy blessed will._

_Let not thy justice prevent the objects and opportunities of my mercy; yea, let them live and amend who have most offended me in so high a nature; that I may have those to forgive; who bear most proportion in their offences to those trespa.s.ses against thy majesty, which I hope thy mercy hath forgiven me._

_Lord lay not their sinns (who yet live) to their charge for condemnation, but to their consciences for amendment: Let the Lightning of this thunderbolt, which hath been so severe a punishment to one, be a terrour to all._

_Discover to them their sinn, who know not they have done amiss, and scare them from their sin, that sin of malicious wickednss._

_That preventing thy judgments by their true repentance, they may escape the stroaks of thine eternal vengeance._

_And do Thou, O Lord, establish the Throne of thy Servant in mercie and truth meeting together; let my Crown ever flourish in righteousness and peace kissing each other._

_Hear my prayer, O Lord, who hast taught us to pray for, to doe good to, and to love our Enemies for thy sake; who hast prevented us with offertures of thy love, even when we were thine enemies, and hast sent thy Son Jesus Christ to die for us, when we were disposed to crucifie Him._

9. _Upon the lifting, and raising Armies against the_ KING.

I find that I am at the same point and posture I was, when they forced me to leave _White-hall_: what tumults could not do, an Army must; which is but Tumults lifted, and enrolled to a better order, but as bad an end: My recesse have given them confidence that I may be conquered.

And so I easily may as to any outward strength, which, G.o.d knows, is little or none at all: But I have a Soul invinciable through G.o.ds Grace enabling Me; here I am sure to be Conquerour, if G.o.d will give me such a measure of Constancy, as to fear him more then man: and to love the inward peace of my Conscience, before any outward tranquillity.

And must I be opposed with force, because they have not reason whereby to convince me? O my Soule! be of good courage, they confesse their known weaknesse, as to truth, and Justice, who chose rather to contend by Armies, then by Arguments.

Is this the reward and thanks that I am to receive for those many acts of Grace I have lately pa.s.sed, and for those many Indignities I have endured? Is there no way left to make Me a glorious KING, but by my sufferings?

It is a hard and disputable choice for a King that loves his People, and desires their love, either to kill his own Subjects, or to be killed by them.

Are the hazards and miseries of Civil War in the bowels of my most flourishing Kingdom, the fruits I must now reap after 17 yeers living and reigning among them with such a measure of Justice, Peace, Plenty, and Religion, as all Nations about either admired, or envied?

notwithstanding some miscarriages in Government, which might escape, rather through ill counsell of some men driving on their private ends, or the peevishness of others envying the Publick should be managed without them, or the hidden and insuperable necessities of State, then any propensity, I hope, of my Self either to injuriousnesse or oppression.

Whose innocent bloud, during my Reign, have I shed, to satisfie my l.u.s.t, anger, or covetousness? what Widows or Orphans tears can witnesse against me; the just cry of which must now be avenged with my Own bloud? For the hazards of War are equall, nor doth the Canon know any respect of persons.

In vain is my Person excepted by a Parenthesis of words, when so many hands are armed against me with Swords.

G.o.d knowes how much I have studied to see what Ground of Justice is alledged for this Warr against Me; that so I might (by giving just satisfaction) either prevent, or soon end so unnaturall a motion; which (to many men) seems rather the productions of a surfeit of peace and wantonness of mindes, or of private discontents, Ambition and Faction (which easily finde, or make causes of quarrell) then any reall obstructions of publique Justice, or Parliamentary Priviledg.

But this is pretended, and this I must be able to avoid and answer before G.o.d in My owne Conscience, however some men are not willing to beleeve Me, lest they should condemn themselves.