The dark and silent corridors had indicated to her that she was the only one awake in this part of the castle, so she was surprised to see lights on when she opened the door to the common room. William was there, setting a kettle of water on the small, wood-burning stove, which was already bright and hot.

As soon as she saw him, she had to fight an overwhelming urge to turn around and head back to her bedroom, but he heard her enter and turned around. "Good morning."

"Morning."

"Would you like some tea?"

"Um, sure. Thank you." She had never felt this awkward around him before; this was the first time she'd been alone with him since she had gotten hurt and he'd started acting so weird.

"Why are you up so early?"

"I couldn't sleep."

"No?" A look of concern flitted across his face. "Is everything okay?"

The bubble of irritation that filled her chest startled her; he always spoke to her in a polite and caring manner, despite the increasing distance she could feel between them. "Yes, everything is fine. Why are you up already?"

He frowned; her voice must have betrayed her. "I'm usually up this early. I was going to head out to Cloud Valley in a little while."

She raised her eyebrows. "That's a long trip for one day." Cloud Valley was several hours away on horseback; it would take him much of the day just to get there.

"Yes. I was planning to stop in Mistle Village for a couple of hours, and then make it to Cloud Valley by evening. I'm actually glad to see you; I was going to check on you again before I left, since I won't see you again until Monday at school."

So, he was just going to be gone for the rest of her visit? He wasn't even planning on going back to the gate with her tomorrow? The bubble grew, threatening to explode...

"What is going on with you, William?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, ever since I got hurt you've been treating me like I barely exist. You haven't even been spending time with Thomas or Linnea, and I know you usually spend all of your time with them, so clearly it's because they've been with me. You never even danced with me yesterday at the wedding I hardly even saw you the entire day. Now, you're taking off and I won't see you again while I'm here. It feels intentional. So what is it? What did I do to make you mad or whatever your issue is?"

His eyebrows furrowed. He studied her face, looking like he was trying to decide something. Then he sighed. "You're right. I have kind of been avoiding you."

"Kind of?"

"Okay, I have been. But it isn't because I'm mad at you or that I think you did something wrong."

"Then what is it?"

"It's just ... I don't think this is a good idea, Quinn."

"You don't think what is a good idea?"

"You coming here, going back and forth between my world and yours."

The bubble burst, turning into a heavy, sticky glob in her ribcage. She was shocked at how much his words hurt, at the sudden lump in her throat, and at the faint stinging in the corners of her eyes.

"Oh." She turned away, hiding her face.

She heard a sudden intake of breath. His voice changed instantly. "That's not what I meant, Quinn. I don't mean that I don't want you here, or that I don't enjoy your company. I actually do."

Still reeling, still unable to look at him, she sank into one of the big, comfortable chairs , curling in her legs and hiding her face. "Then what do you mean?"

"I mean that this is serious stuff you're playing around with here, Quinn, having one foot in each world. It's real, and it will affect your life. You already lied to your mom to come here. And where exactly does Zander think you are this weekend?"

She was silent.

"That's what I thought. And there are real people on this end, too, you know. Thomas and Linnea. My little sisters are becoming quite attached to you. How do you think this is going to end? A year from now, in your world, you're going to graduate from high school, go to college, and maybe get married not long after that." She heard the clink of a mug against the table, and the sound of him sitting down in a chair across from her. "What's going to happen then?"

No longer afraid she was going to cry, she sneaked a peek at him he didn't look upset; he held his hand toward the tea. She picked up the mug and sipped at the hot, sweet liquid, contemplating his words.

"I don't know," she said, finally.

"Exactly."

"Exactly what, William? Because I don't know how every single thing is going to work out in the future means I shouldn't make friends and enjoy spending time with people now?"

"But what is the point, Quinn? You're building up all of these relationships and friendships that you can't keep. You're going back through the gate tomorrow. What are you going to do? Keep risking yourself by lying to your family and your friends to come back here? And why come back at all? Just to prolong the inevitable farewell?"

She sat back deep in her chair, pulling her knees up in front of her and resting her cup on them. "So, are you asking me what the point is of caring about people if I'm not going to get to see them every day for the rest of my life?"

"Try ever again, Quinn. When you walk through that gate tomorrow, there's a good chance that you will never see any of these people ever again. Why put yourself through that? Why make them care about you and then put them through that?"

"Maybe it's worth it to me, William. If tomorrow is the last time I ever see Thomas, I'm not going to regret having known him. For the rest of my life there is going to be this part of me that is different because of him. And you. I've seen you at school every day for the past how many years, and I'm only just now getting to know what an amazing person you are. I don't feel like I'm losing out on something just because I might not get to see you all of the time once you leave Bristlecone. What I really feel like is that I've lost all of these years we could have had that connection."

William looked taken aback.

"And what is the point of that? What is the point of spending all of these years in Bristlecone completely locked up inside of yourself? You spend so much energy keeping yourself from everyone, sharing nothing. What does it accomplish? You don't have to miss them when you leave? Is that really worth all the time you've had to spend alone? You're right. When I leave Eirentheos tomorrow, I may never come back, but I still don't think I've wasted my time. For all the years you've spent in Bristlecone, what are you going to take with you when you leave? A few hundred books worth of knowledge that Nathaniel could have carted back with him through the gate?"

"That isn't fair, Quinn. You don't understand the sacrifices I've made the sacrifices you would have to make if you keep going back and forth, trying to be part of two worlds. It isn't easy trying to live a secret life. These people you claim to care about, Quinn? You're lying to them. You've lied to your mother. What kind of relationship are you thinking you're going to have with a boyfriend you're already lying to? Are you going to run off and marry someone that you can never share some big part of your life with?"

Quinn's mouth fell open. It took several long sips of tea to recover. "I don't like the lying part."

"Kind of hard to build relationships based on lies, isn't it?"

She didn't answer.

"This is what I mean. There are a lot of things you are not considering, and it will affect your life. This is real."

She sat there in her chair, letting his words sink in before she answered. "Shouldn't it be my choice, either way?"

"Do the choices you make only affect you?"

"Of course not. Just like yours don't, William. You've been avoiding me all week hoping that it was going to result in me making a particular choice. Do you think that didn't affect anyone else? You could have been spending that time with your family who loves you and wanted to be celebrating and having fun with you. Instead, you were trying to force everyone into choosing what you thought was best. Did it work? Was it worth the cost?"

His mouth opened, and then closed again.

"You're free to make whatever choices you want. I would like it if we could be friends, regardless of what ends up happening. You could be the one person in Bristlecone I could talk to without lying, you know. And I could be someone you don't have to hide yourself from, if you just didn't waste all of this time trying to control things you can't."

"And then what? We go our separate ways in a few months when I graduate high school and pretend it never happened?"

"No, William. We don't ever pretend it never happened. I don't know what is going to happen in the future, nobody does. People go their separate ways all the time, but it doesn't mean that the friendship just never happened. It will never not mean something."

She swallowed hard. "My dad died when I was three. Just because I can't see him now, does that mean it never happened, or that I should pretend that it didn't? He loved me, and that still means something, it always will. It's never a waste of time to care about somebody."

William sighed, staring into his teacup. "So what do you propose, Quinn?"

"I say we should be friends. You stop avoiding me, and we talk to each other no lying and no hiding. Whether I ever come back to Eirentheos, or I just see you in Bristlecone. We've already been through too much together to pretend that it doesn't matter. As far as the rest of it, whatever happens will happen."

He sighed again, and then nodded. "Okay."

"Okay what?"

"We'll be friends."

* 15 *.

The Gate

HER SECOND TRIP TO Eirentheos felt as if it had been much shorter than the first. It seemed like she had only just arrived; it couldn't possibly already be time to leave, but it was. She spent the last day with the family in the sunshine, enjoying a picnic lunch and a friendly game of crumple. She was gaining some skill at the game, even though Thomas had made a point of babying her injury going so far as to make Linnea switch out with him to be on Quinn's team when he noticed Linnea using Quinn's bum arm to her advantage.

After several rounds of teary good-byes, she mounted Dusk and followed Thomas and Storm onto the path. Her warm clothes and heavy winter coat were packed inside her backpack in one of the saddlebags. Already, she was dreading the return to freezing cold temperatures.

Dusk's other bag was loaded down with medical supplies and necessities. Once Quinn was back in Bristlecone, Thomas was going to spend the night in Mistle Village before traveling to Cloud Valley in the morning to meet up with William.

Usually, the brothers were inseparable when William was home; Thomas traveled everywhere with him. She knew that Thomas had stayed behind at the castle just for her, which made her feel a small twinge of guilt her presence was depriving them of valuable time they would have been spending together.

On horseback, the ride from the castle to the gate was short, they would have arrived at the bridge well before sunset even if they hadn't allowed the horses to run a couple of times, chasing one another and laughing.

Dismounting Dusk was hard. She walked up by the mare's face and stroked her silky, gray neck, trying to swallow the lump in her throat.

"Did you enjoy yourself here?" Thomas smiled over at her, the late afternoon sunlight reflecting off his short, black curls.

"How could I not? Your family is so sweet and wonderful. I feel like I've been spoiled for ten days."

"Good. That was the idea." His gray eyes twinkled, as they usually did, though she had an inkling that something wasn't quite right.

"Is everything okay?" She watched his face as she pulled her backpack out of Dusk's bag, relieving her horse of some of the weight.

"Sure aside from the fact that you're leaving."

She rolled her eyes, setting the backpack down at the base of the stone steps. He was grinning at her, but something was definitely amiss. "Did you ever figure out what Gavin was lying about, or what's going on with your cousin?"

His entire expression changed; she'd hit on something. He stared at her, studying her face.

"What?" she asked. "What is it?"

After another long silence, he reached into his pocket and slowly pulled out an object. It was a chain no a necklace of some sort, with a silver circle hanging from it... She looked up at him, confused. "Your pendant?"

He shook his head. "Not mine," he said, pulling his own out from under his shirt to show her.

She didn't understand.

"It's my cousin's it's Lily's. She's the one I was looking for at the wedding."

"Why do you have it?" This was the strangest conversation she had ever had with him. She had no idea where he was going with this.

"I found it."

"Where? At the wedding?"

"No. When we were in Bay Run on market day, one of the vendors was selling it from his jewelry stand he disappeared as soon as he realized I knew what it was. I'm sure much of what he was selling was stolen items, or things he bought from disreputable sources.

She frowned. "Wait. That doesn't make any sense. Didn't you say she lives in Philotheum?"

He nodded.

"Then how would it... How do you know it's hers?"

He held out the small pendant and set it gently in her hand, pointing to the tiny words engraved near the bottom of the circle.

After staring at it for several seconds, beginning to understand his concern, she looked up. "I don't suppose there's another Lily Elise Rose somewhere?"

"Who's a fourth-born from the Eirenthean royal line? No."

She looked closely at the silver design. Above Lily's name was an engraving of a flower she couldn't identify, though the same one appeared on William's pendant. She flipped it over and was surprised to find that the reverse side was blank. "Where's the design that's supposed to be on this side?"

Thomas reached for the pendant around his own neck and rubbed his thumb softly against the circular pattern. "The royal seal only appears on your pendant if you are a direct child of the king or his firstborn. My siblings and I all wear the seal, but only Simon's children will."

She raised her eyebrows. "There are so many things I don't know about your world."

He shrugged. "I'll bet it pales in comparison to what I don't know about yours."

"Maybe ... so how are you thinking Lily's locket found its way to a market stall in Eirentheos?"

"I don't have any idea. At first, I thought it had to be something simple, like that they were in town for the wedding, and maybe... I don't know. Theft is somewhat uncommon in our kingdom, but obviously it happens."