IMPROVISO ON A YOUNG HEIR'S COMING OF AGE

Long expected one-and-twenty, Ling'ring year, at length is flown; Pride and pleasure, pomp and plenty, Great----, are now your own.

Loosen'd from the minor's tether, Free to mortgage or to sell; Wild as wind, and light as feather, Bid the sons of thrift farewell.

Call the Betseys, Kates, and Jennies, All the names that banish care; Lavish of your grandsire's guineas, Show the spirit of an heir.

All that prey on vice or folly Joy to see their quarry fly: There the gamester light and jolly, There the lender grave and sly.

Wealth, my lad, was made to wander, Let it wander as it will; Call the jockey, call the pander, Bid them come, and take their fill.

When the bonny blade carouses, Pockets full, and spirits high-- What are acres? what are houses?

Only dirt, or wet or dry.

Should the guardian friend, or mother Tell the woes of wilful waste; Scorn their counsel, scorn their pother, You can hang or drown at last.

EPITAPHS.

AT LICHFIELD.

H. S. E.

MICHAEL JOHNSON,

VIR impavidus, constans, animosus, periculorum immemor, laborum patientissimus; fiducia christiana fortis, fervidusque; paterfamilias apprime strenuus; bibliopola admodum peritus; mente et libris et negotiis exculta; animo ita firmo, ut, rebus adversis diu conflictatus, nec sibi nec suis defuerit; lingua sic temperata, ut ei nihil quod aures vel pias vel castas laesisset, aut dolor vel voluptas unquam expresserit.

Natus Cubleiae, in agro Derbiensi, anno MDCLVI; obijt MDCCx.x.xI.

Apposita est SARA, conjux,

Antiqua FORDORUM gente oriunda; quam domi sedulam, foris paucis notam; nulli molestam, mentis ac.u.mine et judicii subtilitate praecellentem; aliis multum, sibi parum indulgentem: aeternitati semper attentam, omne fere virtutis nomen commendavit.

Nata Nortoniae Regis, in agro Varvicensi, anno MDCLXIX; obijt MDCCLIX.

c.u.m NATHANAELE, illorum filio, qui natus MDCCXII.

c.u.m vires et animi et corporis multa pollicerentur, anno MDCCx.x.xVII. vitam brevem pia morte finivit.

IN BROMLEY CHURCH.

HIC conduntur reliquae ELIZABETHAE Antiqua JARVISIORUM gente Peatlingae, apud Leicestrenses, ortae; Formosae, cultae, ingeniosae, piae; Uxoris, primis nuptiis, HENRICI PORTER, secundis, SAMUELIS JOHNSON, Qui multum amatam, diuque defletam, Hoc lapide contexit.

Obijt Londini, mense Mart.

A. D. MDCCLIII.

IN WATFORD CHURCH.

In the vault below are deposited the remains of JANE BELL[a], wife of JOHN BELL, esq.

who, in the fifty-third year of her age, surrounded with many worldly blessings, heard, with fort.i.tude and composure truly great, the horrible malady, which had, for some time, begun to afflict her, p.r.o.nounced incurable; and for more than three years, endured with patience, and concealed with decency, the daily tortures of gradual death; continued to divide the hours not allotted to devotion, between the cares of her family, and the converse of her friends; rewarded the attendance of duty, and acknowledged the offices of affection; and, while she endeavoured to alleviate by cheerfulness her husband's sufferings and sorrows, increased them by her grat.i.tude for his care, and her solicitude for his quiet.

To the testimony of these virtues, more highly honoured, as more familiarly known, this monument is erected by JOHN BELL.

[a] She died in October, 1771.

IN STRETHAM CHURCH.

Juxta sepulta est HESTERA MARIA, Thomae Cotton de Combermere, baronetti Cestriensis, filia, Johannis Salusbury, armigeri Flintiensis, uxor, Forma felix, felix ingenio; Omnibus jucunda, suorum amantissima.

Linguis artibusque ita exeulta, Ut loquenti nunquam deessent Sermonis nitor, sententiarum flosculi, Sapientiae gravitas, leporum gratia: Modum servandi adeo perita, Ut domestica inter negotia literis oblectaretur; Literarum inter delicias, rem familiarem sedulo curaret.

Multis illi multos annos precantibus diri carcinomatis venene contabuit, nexibusque vitae paulatim resolutis, e terris, meliora sperans, emigravit.

Nata 1707. Nupta 1739. Obijt 1773.

IN WESTMINSTER ABBEY.

OLIVARII GOLDSMITH, Poetae, Physici, Historici, Qui nullum fere scribendi genus Non tetigit, Nullum quod tetigit non ornavit: Sive risus essent movendi, Sive lacrimae, Affectuum potens, at lenis, dominator: Ingenio sublimis, vividus, versatilis, Oratione grandis, nitidus, venustus: Hoc monumento memoriam coluit Sodalium amor, Amicorum fides, Lectorum veneratio.

Elfiniae, in Hibernia, natus MDCCXXIX.

Eblauae literis inst.i.tutus: Londini obijt MDCCLXXIV [a].

[a] This is the epitaph, that drew from Gibbon, sir J. Reynolds, Sheridan, Joseph Warton, &c. the celebrated _Round Robin_, composed by Burke, intreating Johnson to write an English epitaph on an English author. His reply was, in the genuine spirit of an old scholar, "he would never consent to disgrace the walls of Westminster abbey with an English inscription." One of his arguments, in favour of a common learned language, was ludicrously cogent: "Consider, sir, how you should feel, were you to find, at Rotterdam, an epitaph, upon Erasmus, _in Dutch_!" Boswell, iii. He would, however, undoubtedly have written a better epitaph in English, than in Latin. His compositions in that language are not of first rate excellence, either in prose or verse. The epitaph, in Stretham church, on Mr. Thrale, abounds with inaccuracies; and those who are fond of detecting little blunders in great men, may be amply gratified in the perusal of a review of Thrale's epitaph in the Cla.s.sical Journal, xii. 6. His Greek epitaph on Goldsmith, is not remarkable in itself, but we will subjoin it, in this place, as a literary curiosity.

[Greek:]

Thon taphon eisoraas thon OLIBARIOIO, koniaen Aphrosi mae semnaen, xeine, podessi patei.

Oisi memaele phusis, metron charis, erga palaion, Klaiete poiaetaen, istorikon, phusikon.

--ED.

IN STRETHAM CHURCH.

Hie conditur quod reliquum est HENRICI THRALE, Qui res seu civiles, seu domesticas, ita egit, Ut vitam illi longiorem multi optarent; Ita sacras, Ut quam brevem esset habiturus praescire videretur; Simplex, apertus, sibique semper similis, Nihil ostentavit aut arte fictum, aut cura elaboratum.

In senatu, regi patriaeque Fideliter studuit, Vulgi obstrepentis contemptor animosus; Domi, inter mille mercaturae negotia, Literarum elegantiam minime neglexit.

Amicis, quocunque modo laborantibus, Consiliis, auctoritate, muneribus, adfuit.

Inter familiares, comites, convivas, hospites, Tam facili fuit morum suavitate Ut omnium animos ad se alliceret; Tam felici sermonis libertate, Ut nulli adulatus, omnibus placeret.

Natus 1724. Obijt 1781.

Consortes tumuli habet Rodolphum, patrem, strenuum fortemque virum, et Henric.u.m, filium unic.u.m, quem spei parentum mors inopiua decennem proripuit.

Ita Domus felix et opulenta quam erexit Avus, auxitque pater, c.u.m nepote decidit.

Abi, Viator, Et, vicibus rerum humanarum perspectis, Aeternitatem cogita!

POEMATA

MESSIA [a].

Ex alieno ingenio poeta, ex suo tantum versificator.

SCALIG. Poet.

Tollite concentum, Solymaeae tollite nymphae, Nil mortale loquor; coelum mihi carminis alta Materies; posc.u.n.t gravius coelestia plectrum.