I felt his hand run along my spine and into my hair before grasping a handful and gently tugging back while moving more aggressively. I didn't know how long I could hold this position, yet it appeared indefinite. I imagined what it looked like to him, so exposed and vulnerable. I was completely at his mercy, but the feeling of not being in control did not make me afraid. With him, it allowed me to let go. I tried to withhold the scream of pleasure building up in me, but another pull of my scalp broke it free. I started to jerk against the restrains that began to sear my skin and could not stop.

His hands grabbed my hips and drove deeply to satisfy his own urge. Digging his fingertips into the flesh, I knew he was close. I remained motionless, taking in every movement he made. Knowing he received so much pleasure from my body pulled another release from me along with his. Both of us panted heavily for minutes while our heartbeats gradually slowed down. Shepard's deft fingers unwound the knots in the board and freed my wrist and ankles. As I stretched to loosen sore muscles, he walked back to the bag and retrieved a small metal tin and a package of cotton gauze.

He removed the lid to the tin and lovingly rubbed the cinnamon scented ointment along the burns that reddened where the ropes were tied. At first it stung, then immediately numbed from whatever was in the balm. Gently wrapping the gauze around, he kissed each spot once finished.

"You shouldn't have any marks by morning. Just don't take those off until then. Depending on how bad it is, you might need one more treatment." He spoke softly while putting the lid back on the tin.

"Oh, I have something else for you."

I remained silent on the bed watching him move about the small cabin. A paper bag revealed a small blue velvet box. He opened it and removed a necklace. With a smile, he placed it around my neck and secured the clasp. I looked down and saw a large coin set in a silver mounting. I had been eyeing it in the gift shop earlier in the trip and told Shepard the story about where it came from.

My grandfather had a replica of the ship that sank near the Florida Keys. It was a Spanish Galleon loaded with treasures bound for home. A storm swept through the Caribbean and sank the ship. After the salvage began, some of the coins became available to the public. I always wanted a piece of the legendary Senora de la Esperanza, and now it rested against my chest.

I started to weep at the sweet sentiment. He had seen that I wanted it, but I couldn't justify spending so much. "Shepard, you shouldn't have. This was really expensive. It's beautiful." My hands rubbed the coin tenderly.

He crawled next to me and circled the coin with his index finger. "Most girls want diamonds and overpriced purses; you want an important piece of history. You more than deserve it. Now you always will have a reminder of our time here."

I snorted at the purse comment. "Please do not buy me that c.r.a.p, ever. This... this is incredible a thank you." I didn't know what else to say. He knew I was grateful for the gesture. "So, if I let you do kinky things, you're going to buy me cool stuff? Doesn't that make me some kind of hooker?"

With a hearty laugh he replied, "Doesn't that make you a normal girlfriend?"

My face dropped slightly. Normal girlfriend. What was that?

Noting my change of demeanor, he asked what I was thinking.

"I've only had one boyfriend, so I don't exactly know what's normal. I just know what I think is or isn't right." My lips curled to the side in deep thought.

"Violet, don't get mad, but what did he do to you? You are a beautiful, intelligent, funny girl. I don't get it."

My chin now started to quiver and I turned away as the tears came. He knew he was approaching dangerous territory, but I'd rather he know now than be upset later. I hated ruining such a beautiful moment, yet the opportunity was ripe. I held nothing back as he held me close. The entire story of Connor Lewis tearing me to the ground and why I vowed never to fall in love again came rushing out with every dirty detail. When I was finished, he kissed the top of my head and spoke with resolve.

"As long as I am breathing, Violet, I will do everything in my power to make sure you will never feel that way again. I promise."

I turned from my resting place against his chest to meet his eyes. His mouth came down softly over mine and kissed me with determination. I knew he wasn't lying. I could only pray fate could allow him to make good on that promise.

Chapter 9 - Can You Do This?.

Shepard dragged the luggage onto the landing and immediately walked up the stairwell with me in tow. His hair had developed vibrant blond streaks from the week in the sun. Golden kissed skin made his blue eyes glow that much brighter underneath lush lashes. It was still early afternoon, but as predicted, he proved insatiable. Every moment cherished because I knew they were limited; it was never long enough.

Being away together for a week simply reinforced a bond that had long been forged. A tangible friction rested between us, despite both of our attempts to ignore what it meant. He looked at me occasionally as if I were going to disappear into thin air, as if he could sense my penchant for fleeing. I could feel to my very core that he would never hurt me the way Connor had done so many times. I closed my eyes to banish the ghost of the past. I refused to a.s.sociate any new sadness with past memories. This was a longing caused by the pending absence of love, not the destruction caused when it goes wrong.

"Hey, come back." His lips returned my focus to where it should be, on the here and now. I savored the flavor of the fruit candies he'd munched on the drive back, which lingered on his tongue sweetly.

"You taste like rainbows," I giggled His chest pushed me back into the bedroom dresser, knocking over a picture frame and causing a slight tink as the bra.s.s disc hit the ground. Curiously, Shepard turned and picked up the shiny metal object.

"Why do you have zils?" Peering at the item and then back to me, he quirked his eyebrows upwards.

"I used to dance a long time ago. Sometimes I still do when I am alone. You would know that if you could see in this window."

With a wink, I leaned down to remove my shoes and freed my aching feet. A week of flip-flops and sandals must have caused them to flatten in rebellion of the heels I favored so much.

Without a word, he snapped the zil tightly into his fist before bolting out the door.

Okay.

Through the bathroom window, I saw the light to his bedroom come on for a moment before flickering back off. Shortly after the downstairs door opened and slammed shut, pounding steps vibrated the wooden stairway.

"Want to tell me what you are planning to do with that thing?" I couldn't help but smile at the violin in his hands. I knew he played a very well, in fact. I would open my windows in the summer to hear him practicing rare Paganini pieces while I worked on lab data.

Holding his hands to his knees, regulating his breathing, he huffed out.

"I want to watch you dance while I play."

The excitement in his voice was electric. How could I deny such a simple request?

"Okay, let me get my computer and load a song. You can run through while I change, deal?"

My mind started to reel at how intriguing this was turning out to be. No one had seen me dance in years. It was one of the few things I could do to keep me feeling grounded. However stressful a day I had, I could move until I was exhausted, physically working out what was paining me mentally.

I pulled the song up and propped the laptop on a chair for easy viewing. The low hum of the first note being pulled across the strings with the horse hair bow sent shivers down my spine. Each following tone was drawn with precision. For never hearing it before, his ability to translate it so perfectly lent to his talent.

I plucked the purple and black coin scarf out of the closet along with the crushed velvet skirt that brushed my ankles. An intricately embroidered bodice fit tightly across my shoulders with the lacing along the bust hanging freely. I used my index finger starting at the bottom to pull tight each crossing of the ribbon. My other hand held the next area together as the boning cinched my ribs in tighter. Over a decade later and the overflowing breast I had hoped for as a girl still failed to appear. Small mounds of flesh burst out from the top, causing me to sigh in amus.e.m.e.nt. My self-loathing dissolved the moment I first stepped in front of a crowd. As I grew older, I became not only accustomed to, but also thankful of my smaller chest.

I sauntered out of the closet into the bedroom and watched the biggest smile grow across his face. Suddenly I became nervous and self-conscious without reason. Shepard turned off the lights and lit a few luminaries that cast shadows along the walls.

"What?" Doubt was creeping over me under his watchful stare.

Shaking his head with a grin, he went back to practicing the song that took me back in time. A young girl named Marianna walked the festival with me. She was a little under fourteen, but her skilled fingers with a bow melted my heart. Just as Melissa took me under her wing, I too cared for Marianna. Her mother owned a floral garland booth and would occasionally sit nearby while oil painting to keep a close eye on us. Considering that we were just kids, our show made quite a bit of money. As one of the few friends similar in age, it was hard saying good-bye when she left with her family at the end. She would play the Turkish style of music I picked for Shepard, called Tsifteteli.

"Are you ready, Violet?" He pulled the violin under his chin and waited for my cue. Like a true performer, he took a stance and became completely serious. I wondered how he would play and watch me at the same time. The small bra.s.s cymbals fit snugly on my thumb and index finger. Raising my hands above my head, I clicked my fingers three times in count for the song to begin. Shepard focused on me as I slowly snaked my arms in the air while rolling my hips back and forth. The metal chimes on my scarf made a loud twinkling noise with each dip of my waist. As the rhythm increased, so did my movements. I closed my eyes and felt the music transcribing under my skin, directing the muscles and bones in an orchestra of bliss.

The sound started to come from different directions as Shepard joined in the dance. Walking slowly in a circle all around, he no longer needed the music and played by ear. It was so perfect and raw, I dared not open my eyes and break the spell. This was me in the purest form; in this moment, my soul was unshackled, if only for a song. He was able to carry me for a while longer, but his fingers gradually slowed due to the intensity with which he played. His hand reached up to my cheek to catch the tear that had escaped. Setting the violin down on the chair and then standing in front of me silently, gentle hands held the side of my face as he leaned closer to my mouth. Instead of a kiss, teeth grazed my lower lip and bit softly.

"Thank you," he said.

He drove me into a frenzy and he knew it. He didn't have to try; it was ingrained in his very being. I wanted to make him experience the feelings he created in me. An idea surfaced in my mind. If he wanted to be entertained, I would give him something to remember.

"Hold on, I will be right back!" Shrieking in delight, I ran down the steps quickly to grab a few items. I heated a mug of hot water for some tea and filled a gla.s.s with ice water. Taking both of them carefully back upstairs, I searched in my closet for another scarf.

He was sitting on the edge of the bed watching me humorously flutter about, preparing something.

"Okay, drop your pants and pick up the violin. I want you to sit on the chair."

Giving a serious look of expectation, Shepard straightened up his chest and smirked at my dominant behavior. Without a word, he removed not just his pants, but all of his clothing before lowering into the upholstered wing back chair. He licked his lips as I folded the scarf in half and whispered for him to close his eyes. After ensuring he could not see a thing, I straddled his lap and laid down the ground rules.

"Since you can play without looking at sheet music, we will see how well you play with distractions. The more you play, the more you get played with. If you stop, so do I. Can you do this?"

As he simply nodded up and down, I traced the outline of his lips with my index finger before sliding onto his chin, where I leaned in and dragged my teeth along the stubbly curve.

"What do you want to hear?" His brow furrowed in thought while asking the question.

"Whatever your heart desires, just don't stop." I laughed lightly as the game began.

The auditory caresses penetrated through every cell of my body. I watched his fingers move across the strings, giving just enough pressure to draw the perfect sound. The small hairs raised on every surface of my skin as I took in the haunting melody. Removing an ostrich plume from the vase on the dresser, I dragged it across his torso in long, smooth strokes. He squirmed slightly as it brushed along his ribcage, yet refused to falter.

Kneeling before him, I gripped his swollen manhood with one hand and took a drink from the warm mug of tea in the other. Swiftly bending down I took him in my mouth and allowed the hot fluid to surround the tip as my tongue danced back and forth along the ridges. The bow skipped across the strings briefly as he sucked in a chest full of air. I tried not to smile, but it couldn't be helped. A stream of tea escaped my lips and dripped down his length.

Allowing him to play a few more measures before another shock, my hand gently moved back and forth with each interval as my lips planted soft kisses along his stomach and thighs. I picked up the ice water and felt his legs tighten in preparation of the cold. I pulled a cube out of the gla.s.s, placed it between my lips, and then traced along his navel and hips, down into the muscular V shape of his abdomen that flexed with each pa.s.s. Taking in a large drink of ice water, I swiftly dropped my mouth over him once more, taking in as much as possible.

Shepard lowered the violin to his side and arched his back towards my face. Quickly taking a sip of the hot liquid, I plummeted down, drawing forth a cry of pleasure. I hadn't noticed he removed the blindfold and was watching in reverence as my mouth worked him over. I knew this was another first I could give him and make it memorable. Looking up, his eyes were darkened, and then shut tightly with the overwhelming sensations. I didn't stop like I warned; this was too incredible to watch. Without notice he pulled me off and shot out of the chair, slamming me back against the ground. His hands pulled aggressively at the skirt to gain access to my center.

"d.a.m.n, Violet."

The yards of fabric only served to frustrate him further. To prevent the skirt from being destroyed, I urged him onto his back to straddle him instead. Grinning wickedly, I used my hand to guide the tip of his shaft to my opening before sinking down slowly. Moving my hips around in calculated circles, I continued the dance with him inside of me, rocking to the tempo of our labored breaths.

Shepard dragged his fingers against the fabric of my bodice and down my abdomen as I rotated my hips harder against him. Leaning back slightly, he pushed even deeper, causing my teeth to clench. Growing restless beneath me, his hands grabbed my waist and directed the speed in which he wanted me to move. To keep my balance, I placed my hands on his chest and watched as he found his release. I would never tire of witnessing these fragile moments of intimacy.

Rolling me back over to rest beneath him, he panted heavily as he looked down at me from propped elbows. "You never stop surprising me, Violet." His head lowered into my neck, nuzzling along the curve.

Tracing the outlines of the muscles on his back, I was thinking the same thing...

Chapter 10 - It All Falls Apart.

I hummed along with the folk song playing on the radio. The smells of cardamom and chili filled the air as I tested some of the spices we brought back from the trip. Shepard had left a few hours earlier and I busied myself in the kitchen to keep from getting too upset. Each time he left got harder and harder, but the ache would ease slightly a few days later. Thankfully, work would keep me occupied and we could talk in the evening, if only for a few moments. I tried not to chide him for being caught up in us, yet even I was guilty of allowing my daydreams to run rampant.

My sheets were saturated with his scent, making me reluctant to wash them. He was everywhere I looked, because he worked hard with me to make this a home. I thought at the time I was just helping the neighbor's kid make some extra money in the summers with small projects like painting and rearranging. It had a more intimate meaning now; every room had a distinct set of memories attached to them. The food we ate for lunch, music we listened to, and stories we shared. It had been polite conversation; nothing personal was ever shared. Now knowing how he felt, I wondered how much slipped by me in ignorance.

I barely heard the knock on the door through the sizzling pots and music. Peeking out of the kitchen, I could see a silhouette through the frosted gla.s.s. Wiping my hand on my ap.r.o.n, I looked out of the side window to see Shepard's father, William. Opening the door slightly, the scent of whiskey and cigarettes immediately violated my nostrils.

"Hey Bill, can I help you with something?"

He frowned at my familiar use of his name. I knew it bothered him, but he creeped me out and it was something small I did out of spite. As he wavered a little before bracing his hand on the frame of the door, I regretted answering the knock. I had dealt with inebriated jerks like this multiple times, but never alone. Growing a little nervous, my gut started to tell me something was wrong.

"Maybe you can..."

With a shaking finger he reached up to touch my cheek and ran it down to my neck where the rest of his hands grabbed around my throat. Leaning in closer, I turned my head to get away from his disgusting breath.

"I gotta give that boy credit. I was beginning to think he was a fairy. But you...mmm... that's impressive. Now why don't you tell me what he does so well a that way I can show you better."

I knew Shepard hated his father and I understood why. He was revolting. Before I could stop myself, I spit in his face, which only served to anger him. His constricting grip on my throat was becoming unbearable. Just as I was reaching up to pry his hands away from my neck, his right fist made contact with my cheek and nose. I heard the cartilage and bones crunching like a soda can beneath someone's feet. Everything happened so quickly, I barely remember screaming and trying to get away.

Grabbing the front of my blouse, another right hook connected with my temple, knocking me down the flight of steps. I felt my head bounce against the concrete and the sting of the salt on the walkway entering the fresh wounds. I wanted to scream again, but the blood choked out any noises leaving my throat. The neighbors must have heard what was happening, because I soon heard sirens approaching. Then a circle of people quickly formed around me, shouting back and forth. I knew my body was shutting down when everything stopped hurting and the overwhelming urge to sleep began. I held on long enough for the ambulance to arrive. Once the red lights began to flash against my house and paramedics started tending to me, I momentarily closed my eyes.

I awoke three days later to a darkened world, unable to see or speak. The pain was so unbearable that I reached for something to squeeze with my hands. I was connected to a type of monitor because an alarm immediately sounded. I heard feet shuffle in and around me as the noise was silenced and the voices conversed quietly among themselves.

"I am Doctor Claira Thomas. You have been severely injured. Can you tell me who you are?"

Injured? What? I tried to speak once again, but nothing came out besides coughs and hacking noises.

"Do you need some water? Here, I have a cup. Open your mouth and I will put a straw to your lips, but drink slowly."

I opened my mouth slightly and felt for the plastic. The sensation of cold water hydrating my parched mouth was like a gift from heaven. She pulled the straw away before I was finished, but promised more in a moment. I had to take it easy.

"Can you tell me who you are now?"

"Violet. Violet Phillips. Where's Shepard?"

The words felt like nails coming out of my throat. I was confused and in excruciating pain. My voice was so quiet that I felt her lean towards me to listen.

"Shepard?" The woman seemed hesitant but played ignorant. "Where's Shepard?" I asked once again, feeling the darkness crawl over my consciousness. I didn't hear her response because I slipped into the void. The sound of low voices speaking angrily pulled me back from the sleepless dream.

"Say what you need to and then you must go. You're not supposed to be here, but I think it's best for both of you if you get to say good-bye. She won't know you were here, but you will know. That has to be enough."

Fear coursed through my veins as I heard the familiar sound of the female doctor's voice. Was I dying? This wasn't happening. I wanted to start screaming, but the pain and drugs kept me motionless.

"I can't let her go. I promised to take care of her. Who ordered her to be moved? Why can't I go?" Shepard's voice was broken and full of agony. I felt his strong hands resting against my cheeks over the bandages.

"Shepard, I'm sorry. Her family authorized it. I know it's not your fault, but you have to understand a this is out of your hands. She will be taken care of. I promise. I can't tell you anymore. You have three minutes."

His trembling lips lightly kissed my forehead and hands. The monitors gave away my racing pulse as I heard him falling apart. Ma.s.saging my fingers and palms, over and over again, he confessed his love and apologies. Death would be a welcome respite from the cruel knife twisting in my heart. I prayed for it to come so I didn't have to listen to him cry.

"I will find you, Violet. I don't know when or how, but I will. Wait for me please. Don't give up on us."

The monitors set off a piercing noise as my pulse began shooting through the roof, alerting the doctor back into the room.

"She can hear me! Violet! Violet! I'm right here, I won't leave you."

"You have to go now Shepard, I'm sorry...security!"

The horrific scream coming from him sent me over the edge. This wasn't real; it was a nightmare. I would wake up and everything would be okay. I kept telling myself, Wake up, Violet. Wake up. My veins began to warm as the void returned to swallow me whole. This was just a bad dream.