CHAPTER TWELVE.

Jackson The house was quiet as Jackson ascended the stairs. Stephanie had arrived earlier when they were wrapping up dinner. She looked much better than when he had seen her last. The dull cast to her eyes had begun to dissipate. Jackson could see how deep the ties ran between Lexie and Stephanie when they were together. They found a perfect balance between each other and it allowed them to draw strength when they needed it.

Stephanie joined them for a gla.s.s of wine before she curled up on the sofa and fell asleep. Her parents had been hovering too much and she needed to be out from underneath them for a little while. She knew they meant well, but she felt like she was disappointing them by not being able to step back into her old shoes. She had told them she tried to force it for their benefit but Jackson could tell it had exhausted her.

When Evan woke up, Cherry saluted everyone and grabbed a new bottle of wine off the counter. She claimed she needed it to get through the night, and no one argued. The house was quiet now other than the sound of the shower running upstairs. Nate had left with Teddy and Dane to head to Lexie's apartment.

Jackson wanted to finish the conversation with Lexie from earlier. It had been on his mind all night and not knowing was grating on him. His mind had been cycling through possibilities because he remembered the look in her eyes before they were interrupted. The only thing he knew for certain was that she didn't think he would like what she was going to tell him.

Jackson glanced in the first room off the stairs and a.s.sumed it was Lexie's mother's room. It was still untouched from when it was pulled apart, but Lexie refused to let anyone enter it. She wanted to clean that room herself when she was ready.

When Jackson walked into the other room he couldn't help but smile. Groupings of pictures covered the walls. He knew Lexie had taken every one by simply glancing at them. She had a way of capturing the world that was uniquely hers.

The bed was covered in throw pillows, just like the bed in her apartment; all different colors and patterns. The bed itself looked like a piece of art. He was glad that Lexie's room didn't sustain much damage. He hadn't seen it before it was straightened, but he imagined it couldn't have looked much different. Jackson sat down on her bed and leaned back against the pillows. He tucked his hands behind his head and looked up at the ceiling. It was covered in what looked a mural made from pieces of magazine cut-outs. All of the colors organized into a beautiful picture of ocean waves, fading into a starry night. It was absolutely breathtaking. Jackson closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The sound of the running water lulled him and he took a moment to rest his tired eyes.

Jackson woke to the sound of shuffling. He opened one eye and saw Lexie standing near him, looking over the camera in front of her face. "I didn't mean to wake you," she whispered.

"No, it's good," Jackson said, rubbing his hands down over his face. "I was waiting to talk to you." He propped himself up on his elbows and noticed that Lexie was dressed in only a towel. Her skin was still damp and glowed from the lamp light. Her wet hair was combed back from her face and hung down her back. He never thought she looked as beautiful as she did then; so raw and captivating. He wanted to be her everything because she had become his.

Lexie set her camera down on her nightstand. She walked closer until her leg b.u.mped into his. "It's strange seeing you on my bed."

Jackson started to push off the mattress when Lexie stopped him, pressing against his chest until he submitted and dropped back down. "Don't get up," Lexie insisted. "Until today, the part of my life with you in it was strange and unknown. Now, you're in the house I grew up in. I'm just surprised how natural it seems."

"That's good?" Jackson asked. The way she was looking at him started to heat his blood.

Lexie grabbed onto Jackson's belt and pulled it from the loop and began to unfasten it.

Jackson placed his hand over hers. "We need to talk first, Lexie." Jackson tried to sound convincing but the fire she was stirring was beginning to roar to life.

"I don't want to talk and I don't want to think right now. I just want to be with you." The tone of Lexie's voice was like throwing fuel on a fire. She pulled his pants down to expose him. His body was ready for whatever she had in mind. He could feel every muscle coiling tight in antic.i.p.ation.

She pulled the towel free of her body and dropped it on the ground. Jackson stopped breathing as he looked at her curves, the dips and lines that he knew would feel like heaven under his fingers, and pressed against his body. He didn't know he could contain so much feeling as it swam through him, full and demanding.

She dropped to her knees and ran her hands up his legs. His body pulsed in expectation, his heart thrummed so loud he could hear nothing else. She grabbed hold of his erection with a firm grasp. The air he had been holding onto rushed from him as she began pulling pleasures from deep within him. Her tongue felt warm as she explored him. It was hard for him to remain still as she pleasured him, his animalistic nature threatened to break free of its cage.

Jackson's heart felt like it was going to explode as pleasure filled him like flashes of lightning, igniting his entire body. As her strokes became more frenzied and her mouth moaned greedily, he almost lost himself. Jackson grabbed for Lexie's shoulder and pulled her up against him. He concentrated on slowing his breathing and clearing his mind.

Her body tensed against his as his erection throbbed painfully against her stomach, angry that he denied himself release. "Don't move," Jackson whispered as he clung to her. Her body began to melt into him and he couldn't believe how satisfying it was to have her bare flesh against his. It filled him with euphoria more potent than any drug.

With her body straddling his he leaned back and brushed the hair from her face. Leaning his head against hers, he looked into her expectant eyes. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"I'm twenty-seven," Jackson said.

"What?"

"I want you to know about me," Jackson said before he pressed his lips softly to hers and brushed her hair back from her face. She nodded, not breaking their eye contact.

"When I was young, I couldn't understand why my father gave his life for his job and left me and my mother alone. I hated the fact that my mother didn't love me. I became a bitter, angry person with no purpose. I hurt many people and did things that I will never forgive myself for. Giles was the reason I got off the streets and put me on a path that I could focus all my hatred on a single goal. Until I meet you, my sole purpose in life was to solve the case my father died for; avenge his death, and bring down the man that was at the helm of it all, John Stodden." Jackson placed his hand against her cheek.

"I didn't think I was capable of feeling anything else but hatred. You changed everything. At first I was angry with you. I hated the distraction, but before I knew it, my world had changed and I was seeing everything for the first time. I realized I was capable of more." Jackson ran his thumb over Lexie's bottom lip. "I'm in love with you, Lexie."

Lexie's eyes watered. The light glistened off them and he pulled her closer, but she began pushing against him.

She shook her head gently. "No, don't say that."

"Why? It's the truth," Jackson asked, releasing his hold on her as she pushed herself off him. She continued to shake her head as tears ran down her cheeks. She began frantically wiping her face. "You can't," she said, her voice was becoming frantic. "You can't love me."

Jackson stood up and pulled his pants back into place. "I can and I do, Lexie." He tried not to let anger slip into his voice. "You don't need to love me back."

"You only think you do. You'll change your mind when you know the truth," Lexie confessed as she turned her back. The pain on her face was breaking him. He stepped closer, wanting to comfort her. He ran his fingers down her arm in a gentle stroke.

"What truth?"

"I'm John's daughter," Lexie gasped and covered her face.

"Lexie..." Jackson wrapped his fingers around her arm and turned her toward him. He pulled her hands from her face and tilted her chin up so she could look into his eyes. "I have always believed you were his daughter. From the first time I laid eyes on you."

"What?"

"I know exactly who you are," Jackson confirmed.

"Why don't you hate me?"

"To be honest, I tried that at first, but it was a sad attempt at best. You have become what's most important to me. That's why I can't bring myself to leave you."

"Then don't," Lexie whispered.

Jackson crushed his lips to hers, tasting the salt of her tears and the divine flavor that was uniquely her. Jackson grabbed her waist and lifted her against him. She wrapped her legs around him as they deepened the kiss. Their actions became emotionally driven as they desperately clung to one another. Lexie ran her fingers through his hair and grabbed tight. He moaned in her mouth as she rubbed her body against his. The pleasure he felt was beyond him and he felt possessed as he laid her on the bed.

Jackson tossed the mound of pillows onto the floor and shoved his pants down. He wanted nothing between them as he lowered himself against her.

"I never had a home, Lexie. I never felt like I belonged anywhere but I want to belong here," Jackson said against her neck as he pressed himself against her entrance.

"You do." Lexie made a beautiful sound deep in her chest as he rubbed against her. Her back arched off the mattress as she grabbed his shirt. He pushed off the bed and reached over his shoulder and hauled it over his head; discarding it on the floor.

Lexie gasped when she looked at his chest. "What happened?"

Jackson looked down at the injuries he had sustained when they had rescued Evan. He had been grazed by a few bullets and was covered in scratches. Dark bruising had formed on his ribs, but he didn't feel any pain. Truth be told; they were relatively tame compared to injuries he had sustained over the years. He had plenty of scars to prove it.

"Hazards of the job," Jackson quickly discarded. "They don't even hurt."

Jackson grabbed her hand that was gently touching his bruised ribs and brought it to his lips, kissing it. "The only thing I feel is you." Jackson looked up at Lexie with a sly smile. "And you feel amazing." The worried crease in her brow quickly melted with her smile.

Jackson braced himself on either side of her as he looked upon her. He wanted to remember every detail of this moment when he would make love to her. He slid his length into her until he filled her completely. He leaned down and kissed her face and she gave a gentle moan of satisfaction. Jackson moved slowly at first: in and out in languid thrusts. He was slowly kneading her pleasure, building it until he ripened it enough just so that she would feel the bliss that currently blurred the edges of his vision and set his body on fire.

Reaching up, Lexie grabbed the bars of her headboard and met each thrust as she demanded him to move faster. Her body writhed and her b.r.e.a.s.t.s bounced with each push. Jackson held her hips firm against him as to not break their connection. He ran his hand down her leg before placing it over his shoulder. Jackson could no longer separate himself from the pleasure he felt as his body was completely victim to it. He grabbed onto the edge, refusing to fall until Lexie joined him. He used his thumb to milk her with each thrust as he rubbed her swollen s.e.x until her body began to jerk against him. He could feel the trembling of her legs as she came undone for him. A beautiful whimper left her lips. Jackson let go and it hit him like a crashing wave.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN.

Lexie Heavy drops fell from the grey sky and splattered on the windshield. It was the perfect weather for the representation of Lexie's loss. She ran her finger over the smooth surface of her mother's urn as she clutched it in her lap. The small ceramic jar contained all that was left of the beautiful person she was. A whole lifetime reduced to ashes in a pretty jar.

Lexie was so grateful to Molly for taking care of the details, she felt like she wasn't even in control of herself as she floated through the day. She had always known her mother wanted to be cremated. She had always said that when she died she didn't want her bones to be buried in the ground out of fear that she would be forever tied to them. She wanted to be set free. Lexie always laughed at her mother's strange belief, but now she felt a sense of peace that she had her wish.

Holding the jar now, she didn't feel her mother's presence. What was in the jar felt like only ash; nothing more. Her mother was no longer bound to the restrictions of her life. Lexie looked out the window and wondered where her mother's soul was. She hoped that she was a gentle breeze that softly caressed a bed of flowers, absorbing their aroma. Drifting free from one place to the next, wherever the sun led her; free as a bird. That was what she wished for her mother, to never feel worry or pain again.

Jackson reached over from the driver's side of the car and placed his hand on her leg. The touch was so gentle but it offered immense comfort. Lexie placed her hand on top of his. He grabbed hold of her fingers and gave them an affectionate squeeze.

When they pulled up in front of the diner, Lexie looked up at the sign. It looked exactly the same but felt so strange. She suddenly felt like a stranger in her own life. Lexie took a deep, shaky breath and leaned back against the seat. Molly decided it was the best place to hold the wake. They had the facilities to handle the food preparation and the seating. Lexie thought it was perfect because her mother spent most of her time within the walls of the diner. She loved this place. There was a sign placed out front stating that it was closed to the public for a private service.

"Do you want me to keep the guys out here? We don't have to go in if you think its best," Jackson offered. "Keep you from having to explain to everyone who we are."

"Are you kidding? The only thing that will keep the questions contained is the fact that most people will be scared to ask with you there." Lexie grinned softly. "I'm sure the whole town has been talking about you."

Stephanie reached up from the backseat and placed her hand on Lexie's shoulder. "Ready?" she asked.

Lexie turned around to see Stephanie and Cherry quietly watching her. "I need you all with me," Lexie said.

Lexie watched Jackson walk around the car and open the door for her. She wished circ.u.mstances were different so she could appreciate how stunning he looked. His dark hair was swept back, accentuating his p.r.o.nounced cheekbones and a jaw that put others to shame. Jackson opened the door and held out his hand for her.

Lexie looked at it and up at him, trying to will her body to stand up.

"Take as long as you need, Lexie," Jackson said.

Lexie looked up and noticed Molly standing in the open door, waving toward them.

"Cherry and I can buy you some time," Stephanie suggested, grabbing Cherry's arm as they huddled under a red polka-dot umbrella.

"We have it covered, doll," Cherry agreed before they both walked off. Evan, Teddy, Dane, and Nate walked toward them. They had traveled in a different car and had just arrived.

"We'll be in shortly," Jackson said as they all looked at Lexie.

"Lexie?" Evan questioned. He looked like a new person after the harsh few days he'd suffered. Thanks to Cherry, Evan was well enough to attend today. He still had a long road ahead of him, but at least he was on the right path. He finally broke the news to his parents that he hadn't made it to rehab. They made him promise he would go and he gladly accepted. He wanted to get his life back on track and Lexie was proud of him. The mischievous twinkle had returned to his eyes and his color was much improved. Now that the physically taxing part of the process had come to an end, the hardest part would be dealing with the reason he'd become an addict in the first place. This was a part of the process that could not be handled in a matter of days. Evan's road was long but he would not be alone.

"I'm fine." She nodded. "Just need a second."

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Evan asked.

"No, go ahead. Molly said she would make extra apple pie, but it won't last long."

Evan glanced back and forth between Jackson and Lexie. "Okay, I'll save you a piece."

Lexie watched Evan throw her one last look before he swung the door open and walked inside. She knew everyone was waiting for her. She knew they would all have questions about why she and her mother had taken off without a word and then weeks later her mother ended up in a fatal car crash. Even Evan and Stephanie's story was altered to keep people away from the truth.

Lexie hated the lies but she knew it was necessary. She was nervous that she would let something slip and expose the truth they were all carefully trying to remain hidden*at least for now.

"I used to spend so much time here as a child," Lexie said thoughtfully, looking up at the sign. "I would fall asleep in one of the booths when Mom worked late and not even wake up when she carried me to the car. It was just me and her for so long. I don't know how to live without her." Lexie teared up as she looked down at the urn.

Jackson crouched down and took Lexie's hand. "She'll always be with you, just in a different way."

"How'd you do it?" Lexie asked. She knew he had lost his mother but he didn't talk about it much. "How'd you deal with the loss of your parents?"

"I don't really know how to answer that for you. Eventually the rawness of it faded but it's still a big part of me. It changed me."

Lexie placed her hand against her heart. "Like a scar?"

"Yeah," Jackson agreed.

Lexie sighed and thought about the beautiful scar her mother left on her heart. She grabbed hold of Jackson's hand and brought it to her face, leaning into his touch. She needed the comfort that only he could provide. Jackson pressed his lips against her forehead. The simple gesture seemed so full of emotion it reached inside her and filled her heart. She never imagined the seed planted when they had met would grow roots so deep and intricately woven. She no longer knew where she ended and he began.

"Thank you for staying with me," Lexie said.

Jackson wove his fingers in hers and helped her out of the car. "Where else would I be?" he replied and they both broke out in a smile.

"I can think of a few places," Lexie replied, looking up into the sky. The heavy drops fell onto her face and they felt refreshing. She had always loved the rain and how it cleansed everything. Even the air was fresher. Lexie closed her eyes for a moment to collect herself before she had to face all of the people that would remind her that her mother was forever gone. When Lexie looked at Jackson, he offered her a warm smile. The look in his eyes made her want to melt.

"Sorry, I'm making you stand here in the rain," Lexie said.

"I like the rain," Jackson a.s.sured her.

"Me too. We should probably get inside, though. Evan's good intentions always go out the window when food is involved. I could really use a big slice of apple pie right now."

"Evan is not allowed anywhere near your pie," Jackson joked.

Lexie laughed nervously as they approached the door. "This will be so painful." Lexie squeezed his hand for strength.

"You got this," Jackson said as he swung the door open.

Lexie took a deep breath and walked inside, holding her mother's urn in one hand while clinging to Jackson with the other. The interior was packed with familiar faces. Everyone turned toward her as she entered. She managed a small smile before Molly gathered her up in her arms. "Sweet Lexie," she said, holding her tight.

"Don't make me cry, Molly," Lexie warned softly.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry." Molly dabbed her eyes with a tissue that had been balled tightly in her hand. "h.e.l.lo again, Jackson," Molly offered with a gentle touch on his arm. "Come with me. There's a table set up over here." Molly led her through the crowd of people that all acknowledged her as she pa.s.sed.

The table had a white lace table cloth and was covered with beautiful pictures of her mother surrounded by white candles.

"This is beautiful, Molly," Lexie said, placing the urn in the center. She picked up one of the pictures of her mother and smiled. Lexie remembered the day it was taken. She'd gone to the beach with Molly and her mother and spent the day looking for sh.e.l.ls. "Thank you so much for doing this," Lexie said gratefully.